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Chief Refreshment Manager
The MC of the game. Was working at a refreshment stand at the zoo when they accidentally curse a bunch of guys with magic water.
  • Achievements in Ignorance: Manages to beat Anon's record time when it comes to hacking into NORAD, while he was also trying to stop them. They were just trying to surf the web!
  • Distracted by the Sexy: In the "Uncut" DLC, the opening scene is expanded upon, where spying a couple of sexy boys making out leads to the magical water being grabbed instead of the non-magic ones.
  • Featureless Protagonist: Much like the sister game, Marshmellow is a featureless, short blob of white in the dates and introductory scenes. Dialogue directed at the player attempts to be gender-neutral when possible.
  • Forgot I Couldn't Swim: Marshmallow meets Kelby by going for a swim and nearly drowning.
  • LOL, 69: Their employee number while they were working at the zoo was #69247... or 69 24/7.
  • Purely Aesthetic Gender: As before, but the starting default is female.
  • Weirdness Magnet: Between what allowed the plot to begin, and meeting individuals like Stirling, Scale, Reece, Finn, and Leo despite the world seeming like a usual, normal world, it's clear that they attract/cause unusual things to happen.
    • They can even lampshade this when talking to Leo.
      Marshmallow: Believe it or not, this is only like the second or third weirdest thing to happen to me.
  • Wholesome Crossdresser: A male Marshmallow can be this in the seamstress and maid jobs.


Voiced by: Morgan Long
A magical being that looks like a red panda. Has the same role as Crush Crush's Q-Piddy, teaching the player how the game works.

Love Interests


Voiced by: Alec Miller
A shy man that was turned into a rabbit. The first boy encountered, staying at the zoo and hoping for a refund.
  • Actually Pretty Funny: As an animal, people greet him with "What's up, Doc?" several times over. He admits that he laughed the first nine times, and that's on him.
  • Easter Bunny: One of his chats comments on him having a dream that he was hiding eggs.
  • Endearingly Dorky: He can be awkward at times due to his shyness, and this is deliberately done on Sad Panda Studio's part.
  • Explosive Breeder: At Max Lover, he makes a joke about rabbits' reproduction in relation to himself and the player.
  • Hair of Gold, Heart of Gold: Pure, kind, and innocent, you would be hard-pressed to find someone more wholesome.
  • Happily Ever After: Says that he's a sucker for fairy-tale endings and wouldn't mind if this is what happens.
  • Ill Boy: Admits at Lovers level that he has a bad heart, but he'd rather have it strained than broken.
  • Insecure Love Interest: Worries that the relationship might be over at Max Lover level since he's no longer cursed.
  • Lucky Rabbit's Foot: Someone apparently asked for one of his feet once he dies. He agrees to do it somewhat reluctantly.
  • Right-Hand Hottie: Works as a "P.A." and his default outfit appears to be what he'd wear to work.
  • Sacred First Kiss: He admits that the curse-breaking kiss was his first one, and as it was literally magic, it makes all other kisses hard to compete with.
  • Stock Animal Diet: Naturally, his dinner as a rabbit is one carrot. On a fork.
  • Sweet Tooth: He admits that before his transformation, he always had a craving for sweets. Once human, most of his gift requests are food.
  • Token Mini-Moe: Downplayed. The achievements involving him explicitly mention he's intended to be the "soft boy" of the bunch, and the shortest of the cast with a two-inch difference from Scale.


Voiced by: Daniel Acosta
A gruff loner that was turned into a wolf.
  • The Big Bad Wolf: He often makes reference to this trope, but rarely seems to act on it.
  • Defrosting Ice King: Halfway through his romance, he's disturbed by the fact that he's having trouble identifying bad things about you.
  • Fashion Model: He apparently is one, but it's never brought up in any of his dialogue.
  • Grumpy Bear: Much moodier than his other half-animal brethren. Doesn't tend to look on the bright side of life to say the least.
    "Hey. Let's be together until the world inevitably crushes our happiness. May as well, right?"
  • Howling to the Night: He finds the moon appealing, and later invites the player to howl at it with him.
  • Man Bites Man: Claims to do this in his half-cured state, when he still has wolf ears and a tail.
    "People are calling me a furry. I'm also still biting a lot of people. These things are connected."
  • Misunderstood Loner with a Heart of Gold: Although frequently hostile, he really is a good person deep down.
  • My New Gift Is Lame: Inverted. At one point, he gives Marshmallow a steak as a gift. Via mailbox.
    "I apologize, because I know how weird that is. Don't make it worse than it already is."
  • No Social Skills: How Volks' compliments come off.
    "You're nice to look at. Good job on your...face."
  • Perpetual Frowner: Almost never has anything but a frown on his face. Extra points for only rarely not having his arms crossed.
  • Sugar-and-Ice Personality: Can go from showering you with gifts and affection to calling you annoying.
    "Stop calling me a 'good boi'. I know what you're doing. I don't care if I like it anyway."
  • Vegetarian Carnivore: As a wolf, Volks will order a salad during the dinner date.
  • When He Smiles: He starts giggling and smiling as the relationship progresses.


Voiced by: Jonathan Ostonal
An athlete that was turned into a rooster. He doesn't let that stop him from exercising or volunteering as a lifeguard, though.
  • Carnivore Confusion: The Dinner date in his animal form is him feeling guilty for eating a chicken drumstick.
  • Innocent Fanservice Guy: Apparently once wanted to try out for a track team completely naked since clothes aren't very aerodynamic.
  • Lovable Jock: He's obsessed with all sports, but is a nice guy overall.
  • Love Makes You Dumb: Fails miserably in his attempts to use poetry to flirt with Marshmallow.
  • Shirtless Scene: In Max Lover level, he will use being sweaty as an excuse to take off his shirt.
  • Unfazed Everyman: Seems to take most things in stride, including his transformation (other than the weird thing about him thinking about him eating chicken as cannibalism) and attributes death threats and murder attempts on him to either bad luck or misguided attempts at kindness.


Voiced by: Michael Kovach
A flamboyant hedonist that was turned into a pegasus with a rainbow mane. He's actually pleased with how fabulous his transformation made him, but won't turn down the player wanting to party with him.


Voiced by: Sean Posvistak
An Scottish/Irish hacker that was turned into a lemur.
  • All There in the Manual: According to the devs, Anon is Nina's brother.
  • Brick Joke: During the Dinner date while he's an animal, he plays around with his phone. During the dinner date when he's mostly human, he shows off a selfie of himself as an animal (presumably taken during the previous dinner date) and mentions how they're paying off for him.
  • Difficulty Spike: He's surprisingly expensive compared to both Garret and Dmitri, and it's likely that a playthrough will finish those two before him because of his requirement for 100 games and a laptop.
    • For earlier players, there's also the 69 drones.
  • Drugs Are Good: He mentions at one point that his diet hasn't changed much since the transformation, eating fruit and leaves...but he used to use leaves very differently.
  • Funetik Aksent: His text boxes are peppered with a fair amount of "ye"s and non-American slang.
  • Happily Ever After: Lampshaded.
    "Looks like ye've cured me with the Power of Love. That's so lame that we may as well kiss and live happily ever after, like the bloody clichés we are."
  • Ignored Epiphany: His time spent as a lemur failed to change his views on equality, as evidenced by one of his partly-transformed statements.
    "Did ye know lemurs have a matriarchal society? Ye could say it taught me about male privilege and equality. But then again, ye could say lots of things. Like, 'I am a banana'."
  • Introverted Cat Person: Some of his dialogue suggests this, such as his initial desire to have been turned into a cat, then later suggesting Marshmallow get cat-ears and tail "to be fair". Alternatively, it might be because he has a thing for cat girls.
  • Lampshade Hanging: Does it several times, especially regarding the method to break the curse.
    "I cannae believe that I'm in some weeaboo bullshit fantasy game."
  • LOL, 69: Two of his requirements are for 69 of an item.
  • Love Triangle: In Max Lover status, he mentions that the situation means he's in one with all the other guys. He doesn't seem too torn up about it and immediately goes on to make a joke about The Illuminati because of it being a triangle.
  • Playful Hacker: His introduction is being impressed by Marshmallow not only hacking into NORAD, but also beating his own best time at it. While he tries to stop it. On accident.
  • Smart People Wear Glasses
  • Techno Wizard: Casually hacks into various secure networks, such as the World Banana Supply Index or NCIC.
    • He even manages to track down Cole's threats and set them on a dead man's trigger so the police end up getting his information should Anon be killed.
  • Terrified of Germs: Downplayed, but one line of dialogue talks about missing the feeling of alcohol-based cleansers, presumably because of this trope.
  • Useless Accessory: Mentions in Max Lover that his headphones were one while he was in his hybrid form, and is glad that they aren't anymore.


Voiced by: Connor Ludovice
A friendly animal caretaker and lumberjack that was turned into a blue bull.
  • Demon Lords and Archdevils: With bull horns and a tail in human form, some nuns get the wrong idea about him...
  • Gentle Giant: One of the bigger guys in the game, and his main attribute is caring. Even as an animal, a bull is bigger than most other transformations.
  • The Idealist: Even at the adversary level, Garret sees the situation in a glass-half-full way. Yeah, he no longer has fingers but a tail can come in handy in many situations!
  • A Load of Bull: Aside from being a talking bull, he seems to defy this trope.
  • Kindhearted Cat Lover: His introduction is him being impressed by Marshmallow saving a cat from a tree when he no longer can.
  • Stock Animal Diet: Has a mouthful of hay on his dinner date as a bull.
  • Third-Person Person: Perhaps because he is a Funny Foreigner, but Garret always refers to himself in the third person.


Voiced by: James "Dijit" Tijidor
A boar that won't let his transformation get in the way of what he's passionate about, such as the pottery class he instructs.
  • Big Eater: At least during his animal dates, he's always seen eating something.
  • Fame Gate: You need at least a few reset boosts to get past some of his requirements.
  • Latin Lover: His teaser video has this kind of accent, and he is a very passionate man.


Voiced by: Michael Kovach
The first kiss
A popular streamer that got transformed into a pinkish-purple tiger.
  • Cloudcuckoolander: As a caricature of Markiplier, he tends to amplify him at his "smartest" with some of his quotes.
  • Cowardly Lion: An almost literal example, as the carnival date with a Lawyer-Friendly Cameo of Chica freaks him out even while he's a tiger.
  • Large Ham: Naturally, considering who he's based off of.
  • No Celebrities Were Harmed: Bears a striking resemblance to Markiplier, and references both Mark's catchphrases and individual videos he's done. When Markiplier did his playthrough, he jokingly kept a tally of the similarities between himself and Ichiban.


Voiced by: Brotheroff
The first kiss
A veterinarian turned into a ram. He learned about the curse when Nimh came in for a checkup.
  • Alcohol-Induced Idiocy: Twice.
    • The first time is him enjoying a little too much wine during the dinner date, which causes him to start talking about how it's making his coat shiny. He realizes he might've had too much to drink then.
    • The second is as a human during the boat ride, which causes him to dress up like a Venetian gondola oarsman and sing.
  • Arbitrary Skepticism: Is at first skeptical of the notion of a curse despite, well... being turned into a ram.
  • Devil in Disguise: Averted, of course, but in half-human form, some people scream and call him "El Diablo" because of the horns.
  • Fame Gate: He needs a whopping 250 reset boost on top of the more usual requirements to progress.
  • Kindly Vet: He loves all of nature's creatures equally... except spiders. Befriend him enough, and he says he'd be more than happy to treat any of the other cursed animals' injuries pro bono.
    • He even considers it sweet that a little kid sang "Mary had a Little Lamb" to him for an hour straight.
  • Playing Doctor: Discussed to the point that he actually labels it as a trope.
    "My pet... I don't normally do the 'playing doctor' trope, but in your case, I think I'll make an exception."
  • Pungeon Master: He might not pun more than the others, but he does enjoy a good pun.
  • Romantic Vampire Boy: His Halloween outfit, complete with a toy bat and a statement that not all vampires have to be pale and lithe.


Voiced by: Skyler Yuda
His partially-transformed state
A musician turned into a chinchilla, who Marshmallow finds helping some old ladies in their knitting club.


Voiced by: Christopher Burns
His partially-transformed state (note the tail and the scales around his eyes)
A vampire turned into a serpent, who is mainly dismayed that his lack of limbs interferes with his favorite hobby: figure skating.


Voiced by: Nina Rhizé Sumter
His partially-transformed state
An apprentice assassin-turned-dragon who was on the hunt for Stirling until his transformation made him set his sights on Marshmallow. His attempt occurs during a piano concert, but being spotted upsets him to the point that he gives up and demands being turned back.
  • Badass Adorable: Youngest in the cast and on the dorky side, but he's still a very competent assassin and is not at all fazed by Cole's threats.
  • Bigger Is Better in Bed: Seems to believe in this, given that he has a smaller organ than the other characters and asks this:
    "I know this is a bit crass, but... If you ever figure out how to temporarily transform me back into a dragon, I was... Let's say more 'endowed' in that form. Just saying."
  • Chuunibyou: Very much so. While he is a ninja assassin, it seems like the only reason he does it is because it's cool.
  • Draconic Humanoid: In his half-human form, he retains the tail and wings of his animal form.
  • Dual Wielding: Always has his two daggers in his hands, if not stripped.
  • Endearingly Dorky: He's the youngest of the entire cast at 19 and it shows in his personality. He wants his jobs to rely on Rule of Cool more than anything else, and despite you being an intended target, warms up to you much faster than anyone else.
  • Honor Before Reason: Gives up on his attempt on your life solely because he was spotted and instead tells you to turn him back.
  • In the Hood: Always wears one in his default outfit.
  • Insecure Love Interest: When in Lover level, he feels the need to assert that Marshmallow likes him better in human form than dragon. He also thinks he's a lot less interesting in this form.
  • Ninja Run: He mentions that running this way is much faster than normal.
  • Screw the Rules, I Have Green Hair!: His hair as a full dragon is green and purple.
  • Shout-Out: His Halloween costume is based on Chat Noir from Miraculous Ladybug. Putting it on him even has him say a line in French, and then ask if Marshmallow will be his "love bug".
  • Steven Ulysses Perhero: His name is Scale and he gets turned into a dragon... which has scales.
  • Third-Person Person: Parodied slightly with one of his quotes while naked.
    "It's Scale! He's still naked! He's also talking in third person because he's awkward at flirting. Please give him a hug."
  • What Is This Thing You Call "Love"?: He mentions that he hasn't really known much beyond killing and sneaking around, and admits he's starting to enjoy things that don't involve that now. Sex, in particular, sends him into a surprised daze in Uncut.
  • Your Size May Vary: Changes sizes repeatedly during the dates as a dragon. He's not always drawn to Scale.

Phone Flings

A shy man that came across Marshmallow's name when one of the love interests left a bookmark with it in a library book.
  • Ascended Extra: Won the second Phone-A-Fling contest to become a full love interest.
  • Be Careful What You Wish For: The official announcement of his victory in the second Phone-A-Fling uses the phrase while noting Cashew's "adorable wish to experience a grand, magical adventure".
  • Insecure Love Interest: Calls Marshmallow to learn more about the apparently amazing lover learned about via bookmark, and becomes a flustered mess when it leads to actually flirting with them.
  • Meganekko: Male example that checks all the boxes.
  • Rewriting Reality: Upon becoming a dateable character, he texts that he acquired a strange notebook at the library's used book sale that seems to be affecting reality, culminating in writing about wanting to be a part of Marshmallow's adventure and suddenly feeling "squirrely".
  • Spear Counterpart: To Peanut from Crush Crush, being a slightly nerdy person with an orange outfit named after a nut that gets tempted into having a bit of naughty fun in a library.

Marshmallow's boss at the zoo. Fired them for the gross incompetence that caused the animal transformations, but still expected them to come to work for no pay, leaving the place short-staffed and him fuming.
  • Clothing Damage: He has a bad habit of ripping his shirts to shreds when angered.
  • Innocent Fanservice Guy: He sends Marshmallow pics of him tearing his clothes in anger as a form of intimidation, seemingly unaware that half-naked men with abs are conventionally attractive.
  • Strangely Arousing: Trying to calm down Boss with conventional methods doesn't work; he's so business-minded that asking him to envision incremental data on spreadsheets is more of a turn-on than ocean waves or calm winds.
  • You Are Number 6: Only addresses Marshmallow by their (former) worker ID number, #69247.

Felix in his usual, non-protesting outfit.
An energetic protester who dials Marshmallow's number at random to send out uplifting messages.
  • Badass Biker: He's got a motorcycle and absolutely no love for authority, plus the usual attire when not nude.
  • Full-Frontal Assault: His favorite way to protest is fully nude, evading cops with, at most, a small piece of paper with a peace sign covering his privates.
  • That Came Out Wrong: When he gets chain lubricant for his bike, he first says that he has to pick up lube on the way home, which Marshmallow proceeds to mention.

An adventure-seeking time-traveler, whose gear (and clothes, save for his scarf) got magic'd away upon entering Marshmallow's era.
  • Bizarre Human Biology: Apparently has two livers.
  • Expy: A fusion of The Doctor and either Newt Scamander or a Pokémon trainer.
  • Genre Savvy: He's fairly certain that making references to various science fiction will help him return to his time.
  • Full-Frontal Assault: He's either completely nude or only in underwear while fighting the Shenaniphant during the lead up to his final CG.
  • LOL, 69: You have two options when he gives you a math problem, one of which is this, and the other is 42.
  • Naked First Impression/Naked on Arrival: Something caused all of his clothes to disappear, except for his trademark scarf.
  • Non-Human Sidekick: Picks one up while looking for his "Plot Device", in the form of a large turtle he names Professor Tennant.
  • Raging Stiffie: In the Uncut, he's aroused in both his second and third images, the former when he's riding on top of Professor Tennant, and the latter right after he successfully defeated a monster. He later admits this is because he's been thinking of Marshmallow the entire time.
  • Reluctant Fanservice Guy: It's not that Reece wants to walk around naked. It's just that he got transported to his location without any clothes, except for his trademark scarf. (In the SFW version, he manages to find a pair of underwear.)
    • That being said, he's surprisingly willing to accept compliments about his physique and body, and (at least in Uncut) admits that the last picture he sends is a deliberate attempt to arouse Marshmallow.

A member of BATS! (the Baseball Aid and Trust Society), and a friend of Kelby, who tries to recruit Marshmallow for a charity game when they're short on players.
  • Ambiguous Disorder: At one point, Ace says that he's not good at picking up on social cues, which might suggest autism of some kind.
  • Brick Joke: It's hard to say if it's the start of one or the end, but in one of the conversation options, you can choose to mention vampires. Ace will say that they are discouraged from playing baseball and are better suited for ice skating, which is exactly what Stirling does.
  • Lovable Jock: Much like Kelby, he's a sport star who has a really good heart.
  • Shout-Out: He explains that BATS! is a baseball society, and not the weird musical with the strangely sexual dancers.

A fatigued office worker from Crop Corp. Inc., randomly calling to conduct a survey on what consumers expect from their food products.
  • Brutal Honesty: His mental filters seem to have stopped functioning from working too hard, so he's incredibly honest about how much he hates his coworkers and how his good looks are due to lucky genetics rather than a healthy lifestyle.
  • Erotic Eating: First lampshaded in his initial picture, in which he eats a donut, then invoked when his second picture has him eating a banana.
  • Noodle Incident: Brings up that someone actually accepting a survey is the happiest he's been since "the lawsuit", and can mention that his rival Patricia from HR is an actual gorilla and not a transformed human, but quickly realizes that's TMI for a phone survey.
  • No Product Safety Standards: Crop Corp. apparently wants to make food with "nearly organic" substitutes to sell to the public.
  • No Such Thing as H.R.: Evidently, considering how many things he can complain about regarding his job.

Poe's full outfit, not seen during his Phone Fling.
A student currently majoring in English with a penchant for poetry and a habit of musing through text. Accidentally texts Marshmallow when he thinks he's talking to his phone's Sirina.
  • Ascended Extra: Won the first Phone-A-Fling contest to become a full love interest.
  • Connected All Along: Based on his descriptions of his professor and her CGs in Crush Crush, it can be surmised that the professor in question is Miss Desirée.
  • Goth: Of the gloomy variety.
  • Idiot Ball: As a dateable character, he ends up transformed into a bird after purposely going for a walk in some eerily foggy woods and drinking water pooled in a stump, which he did mainly for aesthetic reasons.
  • Irony: Upon becoming a dateable character, he remarks that he's not surprised to have turned into a bird...but is rather upset to be a magpie, when it would be more thematically appropriate for him to be a raven.
  • Multicolored Hair: A grey streak in his otherwise black hair.
  • Naked First Impression: In Uncut, the first picture of his is him lying in bed sans clothing, not realizing until it's too late he's technically sent an unsolicited dick pic to a stranger.
  • Named After Somebody Famous/Steven Ulysses Perhero: Named after Edgar Allan Poe, and really into poetry.
  • Parental Issues: At one point, he can say that "Sirina" has "failed [him] worse than [his] father", before quickly mentioning that he was kidding... about Sirina failing him, at the very least.
  • Professionals Do It on Desks: In Uncut, he mentions he likes the idea of being teased by Marshmallow while working until the point he can't take it anymore and "[they] just fuck on the desk".
  • Raging Stiffie: In Uncut, he apologizes for the second picture being "dick-picky" because he's become somewhat aroused. He was going for an artistic shot instead.
  • Squick: In-Universe, he reacts like this when thinking of the possibility he could end up arousing his teacher if he submits smut as homework.
  • Sudden Name Change: Was named "Serral" when he was first released, with it being changed to Poe around twelve hours later.
  • Too Many Belts: One as a collar, nine on his jacket, one used normally, and two on each boot.
  • Walking Shirtless Scene: Doesn't wear a shirt at all in any of his Phone Fling CGs, and depending on the version, doesn't wear anything until becoming a dateable character.
  • Waxing Lyrical: Marshmallow can reply to him mentioning his weird dreams that "Sweet dreams are made of these." Poe will then reply, "Who had a mind to disagree?"

A firefighter who contacts you after rescuing a small cat, assuming it was yours. He has a very poor choice in words and can come off strangely.
  • Cat Up a Tree: The first picture he sends heavily implies that this was the situation he got the cat from.
  • Kindhearted Cat Lover: He makes it clear how much he loves cats, and he's a firefighter because it makes him feel like a hero when he saves others.
  • Endearingly Dorky: Despite the guy's appearance and being bigger than quite a few members of the cast, he has a very naive chat pattern and tends to put smileys. It's lampshaded at one point in Uncut.
    Logan: You... Uh... Wanna see..? :D
    Dialog Option 2: That's probably one of the nicest ways someone has asked to send me a nude.
  • Modesty Towel: His final CG in the SFW version has him wearing this.
  • Perma-Stubble: There's always a line of very short hair along the outline of his chin.
  • Shower Scene: Subverted. He sends you a picture before he takes a shower and right after, but not during.
  • That Came Out Wrong: During the conversation leading up to the first CG in the Uncut, he says that he has "pictures of your pussy" and keeps digging himself deeper. It's only after he sends the picture that he realizes how wrong it sounds.
    • Again in Uncut, he doesn't realize that it sounds like he's asking for permission to send a nude pic.
  • Walking Shirtless Scene: In Uncut, all of his CGs have him not wearing a shirt.

An elf who contacts you after being pointed your way by a female deity who says that you hold the knowledge and power required to defeat Harddix.
  • Clothing Damage: Gets attacked by a snake while gathering flowers and loses his shirt that way.
    • He then loses his pants while escaping Harddix later on.
  • Continuity Nod: His dialogue suggests that Pamu is the goddess that gave him your number.
  • Elfeminate: Despite his muscular physique, he has a very soft face.
  • Expy: Of Link. You can even make him accidentally perform the Song of Storms, and his world is known as Thighrule.
  • Late to the Punchline: If you mention the pun in Harddix's name, he takes a while to realize it, then expresses disappointment that he didn't notice it sooner.
  • Moment Killer: Briefly subjected to one while trying to finish his date with Rosie Palms in Uncut.
  • Play-by-Post Game: Like with Boss, you engage in sexual roleplay with him in Uncut.
  • Pointy Ears: Has them, as part of being an elf.
  • Raging Stiffie: In Uncut, he ends up falling into a field of "Lusty Lilies" with this being the result.
  • Shameless Fanservice Guy: Doesn't mind being naked at all.

A cyborg whose console links up to Marshmallow's cell phone. As a result, he identifies them as his master and follows their orders as he tries to save the world.
  • Bigger Is Better in Bed: In Uncut, one of the parameters that can be chosen for him is a "big dick".
  • Clothing Damage: Suffers from this during his fight with a monster.
  • Endearingly Dorky: Despite his usual calm attitude, he gets easily flustered and his messages freak out briefly when flirted with. Marshmallow comments on this.
  • Expy: Of Genos, being a heroic android with short curly hair.
  • Going Commando: Notably, his second CG in Uncut shows this, while the same image in the standard version has him wearing boxer briefs underneath his clothes.
  • I Call Him "Mister Happy": "Dick.EXE"
  • My Sensors Indicate You Want to Tap That: Mentions that his sensors indicate that Marshmallow isn't displeased by the clothing damage he suffers.
  • Naked on Arrival: Only wears boxer briefs in the standard version in his first image, and nothing during all of the uncensored ones.
  • People Jars: Is inside one to receive upgrades in the first CG.
  • Power Perversion Potential: Says that he'd disintegrate Marshmallow's underwear instead of removing it just because it's something he can do in Uncut. Also, his tongue (and dick) can vibrate.
  • Robot Maid: A later conversation with his creator, Alfie, reveals that he was built to be "a sexy butler" in addition to being a hero.
  • What Is This Thing You Call "Love"?: It's possible for him to download love.

A friend of Stirling's, and a literal devil. Challenges Marshmallow to wager their soul and answer his riddles, but promises to fulfill any outlandish requests on defeat.

An adventurous Australian who wandered into the brush days ago and randomly found a phone there.
  • Connected All Along: A little while after his first photo, we learn that he is Garret's cousin.
  • Excessive Mourning: His motivation for abandoning civilization for a bit is to deal with the grief of losing some friends.
  • Funny Foreigner: His Ozzy-ness is very much played up, such as him being upset that he can't wear thongs in the jungle.note 

A student of Snogwarts (where Vellatrix still teaches) who was held back a year, mainly because a curse prevents him from practicing magic while wearing more than his underwear. Contacts Marshmallow because they're a Professor of Charms and Transformations, making reference to the magic water from the game's introduction.
  • Connected All Along: Is familiar enough with William to try and use him as an intermediary to give Marshmallow a doctor's note.
  • Expy: Of both Harry Potter (magical prodigy hindered by He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Referenced) and Draco Malfoy (name, appearance).
    • He also bears some similarities in appearance to Ricken.
  • Naked First Impression: His first photo sent was him naked (or at least in his underpants) casting a magic spell.

An online gamer that befriends Marshmallow after they're randomly matched as teammates in a game.
  • Connected All Along: He mentions that his regular gaming friends include a girl that likes retro games and two hackers, the male of which has a sister that messes with him, implying that he's friends with Myu, Anon, and Ruri.

A professional detective who uncovered Marshmallow's number while trying to ascertain the whereabouts of his assistant, Winston. Treats mysteries like games, with the solution as its own prize.
  • Forgotten First Meeting: The case for something stolen that he wants Marshmallow's assistance with is actually his way of saying that Marshmallow "stole" his heart after a forgotten one-night stand.
  • Sherlock Homage: His whole gimmick, complete with the outfit and a so-so relationship with Scotland Yard.

An all-natural merman who contacts Marshmallow through a magic mirror. Though initially dismissive, he quickly becomes enamored to the point of purposely endangering himself to keep their attention on him.
  • Attention Whore: Quickly becomes one for Marshmallow.
  • Mermaid Problem: Played with between the normal and uncensored versions. The normal version naturally has the usual problem, but in the uncensored version, his genitals are exactly where they would be if he were a human, and are always on full display.

A DJ who has lost his groove. Contacts Marshmallow for help regaining it, after getting his number from Myx.

A web content creator whose videos focus on food, he was intrigued by the one known as "Marshmallow", having been told of their existence by online friend Theo.
  • Big Eater: His gimmick, even if he's not as big an eater as he pretends to be.
  • Food Porn: Food is a big focus of his videos.

    Alfie Alfalfa 

The billionaire inventor who built Leo, now trying to recruit Marshmellow to his organization.

    Sascha Ton van Twilhaar 

The prince of a foreign land whose father died while wrongfully imprisoned. He needs Marshmallow's help to retrieve his rightful fortune, and all they have to do is send him a thousand dollars...

  • 419 Scam: His request has all the trappings of one. He's being completely honest.
  • LOL, 69: He's 69th in line to the throne, which is apparently still close enough to have his own lavish house and servants.
  • Unusual Pets for Unusual People: He claims that the red lobster seen in his first pic is actually his pet, and is just lying on a plate because it loves lettuce.

DLC / Limited Time Events

His partially-transformed state
A man that was turned into a hedgehog, fastest of all animals by an internet link that he clicked on. He found out about Marshmallow and approached them with the request to help them with the curse in exchange for teaching the ability to speed date.

A mentally-unstable young man that was turned into a panther. He murders a fish in a bathroom, expecting Marshmallow to be called to investigate due to their reputation in saving animals. (Fortunately, the fish doesn't appear to have been a cursed boy.)
  • Art Shift: The first guy in the game with a fully-animated portrait.
  • Cats Are Mean: In contrast to Ichiban, he's the evilest character in the game.
  • Crazy Jealous Guy: Transitioning to him from any other boy might have him comment on the other boy and express how much he dislikes them.
  • Destructive Romance: Most of the achievements for his relationship levels even state this.
  • Evil Sounds Deep: One of the deepest voices in the game.
  • The Fourth Wall Will Not Protect You: His icon's eyes occasionally widen and stare directly at the player for a few seconds, unlike all the other boys' icons which will remain static.
  • Living Emotional Crutch: He admits that Marshmallow quickly becomes this for him.
    Cole: Your embrace is the only thing that makes me feel safe, or sane.
  • Mad Artist: A bloodstained one as a... “Halloween costume”.
  • Messy Hair: As a human, his short black hair is always disheveled.
  • Mugging the Monster: He threatens all of the other main boys in the game, including Scale and Stirling.
  • Spear Counterpart: Has the exact same gimmick as Ayano from Crush Crush, even considering to Murder the Hypotenuse—that is to say, all the other boys.
  • Threat Backfire: He tends to attempt to threaten the other boys a lot, and in most cases it doesn't work due to the others Comically Missing the Point or aren't at all afraid of him.
    • Given the nature of the game, this also crosses over into Ineffectual Death Threats considering any of his attempts are doomed to fail.
  • When He Smiles: Marshmallow is more than capable of making him give a genuine smile instead of the unhinged one he tends to have.
  • Yandere: Oooo boy, is he ever a clear example. If him wielding a kitchen knife in nearly all his post “awkward besties” date pictures wasn’t a clue, or his “Halloween costume” being covered in “red paint” didn’t give any indication, then you need only listen to the way he talks and look at his dialogue boxes.

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