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Must have been one hell of a square dance.

  • In 101 Dalmatians: The Series, Cruella De Vil's cousin, P.H. De Vil, has a sales pitch calling himself an evil genius, mad scientist, and junk food connoisseur.
  • In an episode of 3-2-1 Penguins! a villain is introduced by all of his horrible personality traits: he's rude, he's dishonest, etc. He ends by admitting (unashamedly), "And I don't always floss!"
  • The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius:
  • Adventure Time:
    • In "Root Beer Guy", an exasperated Root Beer Guy, desperate to convince the Banana Guards that Princess Bubblegum is in mortal danger, resorts to implicating himself in the crime. However, he finds that even that isn't enough.
      Root Beer Guy: Don't hang up! Uh, I'm Root Beer Guy. I'm the guy who kidnapped Princess Bubblegum! Yeah, yeah, wrapped her in a carpet, yeah, and I'm gonna dump her in Lake Butterscotch! I'm completely insane, ahahahaha, but you still have time to stop me. Get up to Lake Butterscotch right now, Banana Guard...
      (Banana Guard does not respond)
      Root Beer Guy: Uh... and I took a boat out after 8 o' clock.
      Banana Guard: Emergency! Quickly, Lake Butterscotch!
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    • In "I Am a Sword", after Finn wakes up from a nightmare Jake tries to guess what he was dreaming about: "Break-up, Lich, me dying, you dying, other break-up, growing up, never growing up, or spiders?"
  • Aladdin: The Genie is giving his master (Aladdin) some tips on wooing Princess Jasmine.
    Aladdin: Princess Jasmine, you are very...
    Genie: Magnificent! Glorious! (beat) Punctual!
    Aladdin: Punctual!
    Jasmine: Punctual?!
    Genie: Sorry.
    • Also from the animated series
      Genie: (Pretending to be a pirate) If she dares cross our path we'll keelhaul her! We'll lash her to the mizzenmast! We'll...make fun of her hairdo.
  • ALF Animated Series: Larson Petty, Melmac's most notorious villain, was booted from the Orbit Guard for blowing up the Zucchini Building, stealing the Statue of Bob the Great and insulting Colonel Cantfail's mother. (But she was asking for it!)
  • The Amazing World of Gumball:
    • In "The Boss", Rocky states that The Chanax Corporation pollutes, cuts down rainforests, and their boss invented boy bands. Earlier, within the same episode, Mr. Robinson refuses to get a stuffing transplant from Rocky, claiming that Rocky is an immature deadbeat who never left school, refuses to get a decent job, and dresses like a Canadian.
    • From "The Password":
      Richard: That's it! I've had it with you two! You choked me, you burned me, the steak you fed me was undercooked!
    • In "The Puppets", the puppets sing a song about the dreadful things they're going to do to Gumball and Darwin while "playing" with them.
      We'll make you dance, we'll make you fight!
      You'll smear yourself with worms all night!
      We'll make you eat toenails and grease!
      We'll make you wear an itchy fleece!
    • In "The Fraud", Principal Brown calls Gumball and Darwin out for being naked.
      Principal Brown: "Let me make this perfect clear. If you wear fake clothes, you're NAKED, which is bad! If you pay with fake money, you're a CROOK, which is bad! If you eat fake meat, you're a VEGETARIAN! Which I, guess isn't that bad, just a bit boring.
  • American Dad!:
    • In "Bullocks to Stan", when Stan fights his boss Avery Bullock after the latter walked all over him for most of the episode and at one point rode him like a horse:
      Stan: This is for delaying my promotion! This is for disrespecting my daughter! And this is for not letting me stop at the creek for a drink!
    • In "You Debt Your Life", Roger is about to get hit by a bus and he thinks back to the bad things he's done which included protesting the integration of a University, sinking the Exxon Valdez tanker, and creating Jar Jar Binks.
    • In "My Morning Straitjacket", Stan claims that rock music is the number one cause of teen pregnancy, school violence, and leather pants.
    • In “First, Do No Farm” after Stan converts their property into a vegetable farm he tells Hayley that they must protect their crops from varmints like rabbits, termites, and orangutans.
  • In the Animaniacs episode "Spell-Bound" (which was, incidentally, the first half-hour episode starring Pinky and the Brain extensively) there are no less than three examples. The first case is where the Brain is reading the table of contents of Merlin’s spell book: “Tabby cat turned into duck, tadpoles, magic uses of, Tahoe, how to win at blackjack…” (After reading that last one, he thinks about it for a couple of seconds, and then says, “Nah.”)
    • Second, the first four ingredients for the “Take Over the World Spell” (the one he was looking for) are: six lizard legs, two eyes of newt, two hedgehog spleens, and one half-eaten gingerbread cookie that’s been left on the counter overnight. (Getting the final ingredient, a red dragon toenail clipping, is the main plot.)
    • Later in the episode, while traveling through the Enchanted Forest to the Murky Mountain to get it, the pair comes across a signpost pointing to the "Glade of Woe", the "Chasm of Despair" and the "Pit of Barbecue". (In regards to the last one, the Brain says, "Perhaps later.")
  • Avatar: The Last Airbender:
    • The Earth King when the Gaang break into the palace, and then are caught by the guards, says "You invade my palace, lay waste to all my guards, break down my fancy door, and you expect me to trust you?" (According to the DVD commentary he really loved the fancy door.)
    • In "The King of Omashu", the Gaang is brought before the eponymous King for 'vandalism, traveling under false pretenses and malicious destruction of cabbages.' The cabbage merchant demands death by beheading for that last one.
  • In an episode of The Batman, The Joker kidnaps several people and gives his reasons why:
    The Joker: Now why are you here? 'Cause y'all done me wrong! Wigzell, you sentenced me to life in the loony bin. Detectives, you arrested me. Shame on you. Bagley, how many times do I have to tell you? I hate macaroni and cheese!
  • In the Batman: The Animated Series episode "Girl's Night Out", after Harley, Poison Ivy, and Livewire trash the Iceberg Lounge, the very disheveled Penguin is angrily yelling to someone on the phone:
    Penguin: You heard me! I need chainsaws, dump trucks, hedge clippers, and a bottle of aspirin down here now!
  • Invoked by Red Tornado as he reeled off a list of a villain's crime in Batman: The Brave and the Bold.
    Red Tornado: Felony robbery. Parole violations. Felony assault. Jaywalking.
    • Immediately lampshaded by Batman: "Not NOW, Tornado!"
    • In one episode, there's a montage of the various things Superman did when he was affected by the Red Kryptonite: causes a storm at a beach, severely damaging a bridge by tying it together like shoelaces, and put a cat on a tree.
  • The Beatles daydream they're the Three Musketeers in the episode "Anytime At All." As they identify themselves:
    John: Athos!
    George: Porthos!
    Paul: Aramis!
    Ringo: And Ringo!
  • Uncle Ruckus, a main character on The Boondocks is a black man who hates black people and everything to do with them. He has stated that black people were better off with slavery and Jim Crow laws, and many other outrageous statements, despite his own skin color. His three favorite movies? Birth of a Nation, Gone With the Wind, and Notting Hill.
    • When trying to exorcise Mr. Stinkmeaner out of Tom he brings several items "guaranteed to scare a nigger": a whip, a branding iron, a noose, a nightstick, and a job application.
    • When talking about how God must hate black people:
      Uncle Ruckus: Look around you! That why we in the ghetto! That's why we in jail! That's why we on UPN!
  • Bounty Hamster:
    • "You stand accused of breaking the Prime Directive, 16000 speed limits, and a really nice vase!"
    • On another occasion a bounty hunter arrests a criminal wanted for "12 robberies, 300 counts of dangerous flying, and dropping an ice cream truck into an active volcano."
  • Bozo: The World's Most Famous Clown: in "Beast With the Least," Bozo is running a giant mechanical dragon that the police (and Butch) think is real. An APB is issued:
    Calling all cars...calling all on the lookout for a monster. Height: about 100 feet. Weight: 50 tons. Caucasian.
  • From the "I Am Rainfo" episode of Brandy & Mr. Whiskers: *Lola breaks in* "AAAH! The boa constrictor, it squeezes the life out of its prey!" *Cheryl and Meryl break in* "AAAH! Toucans, they use their beaks to crush fruits and defenseless animals!" *Ed breaks in* "AAAH! The river otter, it tells long boring stories and has a very weak bladder!"
  • In the Bravestarr episode "The Witnesses", the list of convictions for Slugworth Moody reads: "5 convictions: Armed Robbery; 3 convictions: Space Piracy; 1 conviction: Illegal Parking".
  • From Buzz Lightyear of Star Command:
    "Suspect: Torque. Wanted in all fifty sectors on numerous counts of: Armed robbery. Extortion. Smuggling. Unpaid parking tickets..."
    "It's a list of evil things Zurg plans to do: Sabotage our fleet. Bust out all the prisoners from PC-7! And steal my newspaper."
    "Ooh! Messieur XR! You scoundrel! You skeeped out of your bill, enraged the chambermaid, and stole our last blueberry bathrobe."
  • In Captain Sturdy: The Originals, it is mentioned that the diabolical inventions of Captain Sturdy's nemesis Dr. Destructo include the zombie ray, the hyper quantum annihilator, and new age music.
  • In Castle, David Macaulay mentions boiling water, burning coal, stones, and "possibly even a dead cat" as being among the weapons dropped onto invading Welsh soldiers death-from-above-style through aptly-named "murder holes".
  • In Central Park, Season 1 "Rival Busker", one of Bitsy's investors is a rich oligarch named Dmitry, who's in The Mafiya. He and his family deal with murder, arms dealing, and fixing the Oscars.
  • From the Clarence episode "Spooky Boo", Sumo, Chelsea, and Jeff are scared of the haunted house because of rat people, dead infants, and home-grown vegetables, respectively.
  • Codename: Kids Next Door:
    • From the episode "Operation: H.O.S.P.I.T.A.L.", while Numbuhs Two and Three were operating on their hurt fellow operative, who later turned out to be Bradley the skunk, the following items that Numbuh Two calls for during the surgery are a scalpel-laser-claw (a scalpel with a laser attached), a reboninator (a jackhammer-like device)... and a chili dog.
    • In the crossover with The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, Billy's Dad says his lucky pants are immune to lasers, supernatural energy, and mustard.
    • In "Operation: G.R.A.D.U.A.T.E.S." the Kids Next Door are stated to follow a code of bravery, strength, and all-night chocolate milkshake parties.
    • In "Operation: G.I.R.L.F.R.I.E.N.D.", Lizzie goes on a tirade on how Numbuh One is always too busy with his missions to spend time with her, mistakenly beat up her grandmother, and ate a meatball sandwich.
  • At the end of the episode "Room Rage" from The Cramp Twins, Mrs. Cramp gets angry at the boys, to the point of kicking them out of the house, because they filled it with junk, dirt and a poster of Rodeo Rita.
  • In The Cuphead Show!, Porkrind gives a shady customer his requested goods:
    Porkrind: One box of grenades, two sacks of gunpowder, a spool of piano wire, and one tube of toothpaste. Spearmint.
  • In an episode of Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja, when McFist thinks he's destroyed Randy and phones The Sorcerer about it, the latter senses fear, despair, and a sudden spike in the price of Ninja memorabilia.
  • Danny Phantom:
    • "Mystery Meat" gives us two:
      Mr. Lancer: Tucker Foley. Chronic tardiness, talking in class, repeated loitering by the girl's locker room.
      (Tucker gives a sly smile)
      • Later, after Jack and Maddie captured Jazz while she was trying to counsel a goth boy:
        Jazz: You've ambushed me, suffocated me with smoke, and worse, I was pulled away from Spike before he had his breakthrough!
    • In one episode, Mr. Lancer says he hates Halloween because of the kids keying cars, egging houses, and bobbing for apples.
    • What Danny, Sam, and Tucker are in "a world of trouble" for near the end of "Kindred Spirits":
      Jack: Skipping school, stealing and wrecking the Spectre Speeder...
      Mr. Lancer: Calling me "OLD MAN"...
    • "Maternal Instincts":
      Vlad: (to Maddie) I've forgiven [Jack] for many things... causing the accident that ruined my life, stealing you, the backwash incident...
    • In the episode when Jack becomes a half-ghost instead of Vlad after Danny changes the past:
      Maddie: You despicable, lying piece of... cheese!
    • In "Boxed-Up Fury", when Danny is reading about the contents of Pandora's Box:
      Danny: Plagues, pestilence, boy bands, man this is one evil box.
    • In "Phantom Planet", after Danny steals the Infi Map back from Plasmius and tells him he seriously needs therapy:
      Plasmius: Taking my map, destroying my satellite, mocking my mental health... it's time I finished off Danny Phantom once and for all!
  • Danger Mouse traces a revolt of London's machines and appliances to a computer at the Mega-Brain Research Center (episode "Mechanised Mayhem"). Apparently, the computer claims to have 48K megabytes of RAM, an exponentially developing intelligence and two tickets to the Cup Finals.
    Penfold: 'Cor! No one's that powerful!
    • In "Tiptoe Through The Penfolds", DM assesses Baron Greenback's magnetic molecular molder in an attempt to destroy it as it is out of control making duplicates of Penfold:
      DM: Let's see...if that's the phase loop rectifier and that's the PH discriminator, then that must be...a plastic clothes peg!
  • Dan Vs.:
    Dan: So what am I being charged with, treason? Attempted extinction of the human race?
    Judge: Trespassing.
  • Daria:
    Daria: Yeah, why should you be afraid of mass murderers, serial killers, torturers, cannibals, puppy kickers...
  • Occurs quite a few times in Darkwing Duck. Some examples from "Time and Punishment", wherein a distant future Darkwing becomes Darkwarrior Duck:
    Darkwarrior: Just think of it, a time machine capable of taking me anywhere in history! I could lock up criminals before they commit crimes! Banks will be safe, drug stores will go unrobbed, and no one will get away with not brushing after every meal!
    Darkwarrior: (rewriting the Code of Hammurabi in Babylon) For stealing an ox, the penalty is death, coveting wives: death, stealing grain: death, tracking mud through the kitchen: ...death!
  • In Dave the Barbarian, Princess Irmaplotz describes her evil deeds:
    I do all the evil things: destroy civilizations, torment innocent people, return library books...late.
    • In another episode when Chuckles the Silly Piggy is threatening the heroes:
      I could roast you over a volcano! Lock you in a cage with rabid dung beetles! Call you in the middle of dinner and try to convince you to switch long distance carriers!
  • On Drawn Together, Ling Ling's father says that Ling Ling dishonors the family name of Hitler Bin Laden Seacrest.
    • Also Wooldoor finding out that Clara is keeping him sick with drain cleaner, cyanide, and Gerber's Apple/Banana sauce.
    • In another episode, Wooldoor notes that his television show can "entertain kids, annoy adults, and funny third thing!"
  • From Duck Dodgers, the Martian Queen, dumped by Dodgers on the eve of their wedding, reminds Commander X-2 just how much she has suffered.
    Martian Queen: Let me tell you a story, Commander. A story of betrayal and lies, and a woman's heart torn asunder. Let me tell you of a consort's throne left vacant, a bridal chamber left barren, and a reception hall left filled with them big shrimp.
  • DuckTales (1987):
    • Played with "Wrong Way to Ronguay" when Flintheart Glomgold and El Capitan set off the homemade alarm and wake everyone up:
      Scrooge: (startled out of his sleep) Robbers! Thieves! Politicians!
    • In "The Billionaire Beagle Boys Club" (Part 4 of the "Super DuckTales" saga), when Scrooge is arrested by the Chief of Police (thanks to the fact that Ma Beagle has him under her thumb) he's brought up on the charges of trespassing, theft, and interrupting a game of Bridge.
  • In one Dudley Do-Right episode, the eponymous character tries to get kicked out of the Mounted Police so that he can infiltrate Snidley Whiplash's gang, but everything goes wrong, from "You blew up the dam! The irrigation problem has been solved!" to "You burned down that building! We had been trying to tear it down for years and never got around to it!". He finally does manage to get in trouble, though... by eating his peas with a knife, something no Mountie should ever do!
  • From the Earthworm Jim episode "For Whom The Jingle Bell Tolls" after learning that Santa has been kidnapped:
    Earthworm Jim: Without Christmas, the U.S. economy will collapse, anarchy will reign, and I won't get my pony!
    • From "The Conqueror Worm" when Jim's Evil Twin is committing crimes in the city:
      News Anchor: Last night's mysterious crime spree included a bank robbery...
      Earthworm Jim: Pfft, big deal!
      News Anchor: ...Acts of wanton destruction...
      Earthworm Jim: Kid's stuff.
      News Anchor: ...And the theft of condiment packets from fast food joints.
      Earthworm Jim: (gasps) The fiend! he must be stopped for the good of mankind!
  • Ed from Ed, Edd n Eddy does this twice:
    • From "For Your Ed Only":
      Ed: It's Sarah! We are so doomed. Help me guys! She'll tell Mom, and Mom will tell Dad, and he'll say "Not now; I just got home from work."! I'm not in my happy place, Eddy!
    • From "Cool Hand Ed":
      Edd: There are severe consequences to... skipping school.
      Ed: Yeah, Eddy. The school will tell Sarah, and Sarah will tell Mom, and Mom will tell Dad, and DAD WILL JUST SIT THERE AND WATCH TV!
  • The Fairly OddParents
    • In "Bad Heir Day", Mr. Crocker wants the following for his birthday: "Number 1. To make 'em pay! Number 2. To show 'em all! Number 3...a jetski!"
    • In "Emotion Commotion", Timmy had to dive through a lagoon with jagged rocks, alligators, piranhas, a whirlpool, a tornado, and one really angry tourist.
      Tourist: The service here stinks.
    • In "Channel Chasers", Mr. Turner scolds his son;
      Mr. Turner: You dented a 747, destroyed Mr. Joel's glass house, and worse, Dinkleberg won my plaque!
    • In "Where's Wanda?", Timmy fishes up his dad, who wants to be a suspect. The end is taken literally. He stole cable, he ripped the tags off of mattresses, and he jaywalked.
    • In "Sleepover and Over", Timmy is cornered by two junkyard dogs and falls off a hill, where due to Contrived Coincidence he ends up falling into a cat costume, a vat of gravy, and a box of car air fresheners. Subverted when it turns out the air fresheners are mailman-scented.
    • In "Pixies Inc.", the Pixies go over Cosmo's performance record, wherein they find out that Cosmo sunk the city of Atlantis, caused an invasion of super-intelligent cockroaches, and created Super Toilet, all of which happened in previous episodes.
    • In "Blondas Have More Fun", Wanda argues with her sister Blonda over who has it harder. Blonda claims that her job as a professional actor is more difficult than Wanda's job as a godparent because she has to deal with the pressure, the limelight, and lukewarm hot tub water.
  • Family Guy:
    • In the Season 1 episode where Meg inadvertently joins a cult the same day Lois tries to have a birthday party for Stewie, the girl mixing the punch adds in cyanide, arsenic, rat poison, and a copy of Paul Reiser's book Couplehood.
    • In the same episode, Peter admits he's a bad father, a lousy husband, and a snappy dresser.
    • Again in the same episode, during Meg's first birthday Peter states that she says her first word, takes her first steps, and performs her first drum solo.
    • Peter bemoaning the sudden popularity of Joe:
      Peter: Geez, first he takes my friends, then he takes my job! [stops] But the way I wear my hat? No, he can't take that from me...
    • In "Not All Dogs Go to Heaven", a newly born-again Meg joins her fellow Christians in burning "harmful" books, including The Origin of Species, A Brief History of Time, and Logic for First Graders.
    • When Brian prevents 9/11 from happening, Stewie fears that Saddam Hussein could be president, Mexico could be the world's dominant superpower, or that Cookie Monster could have invented Facebook.
    • According to the anti-abortion video in the episode "Partial Terms of Endearment": "Remember, not only is abortion murder, but it's also larceny, jaywalking, and securities fraud."
    • In "Halloween on Spooner Street", when Brian finds Stewie shooting at trick-or-treaters from his window mistaking them for monsters, Stewie claims that they're under attack from zombies, vampires, and a Mexican princess.
    • Sort of a variation, when three tough guys muscle the gang out of their booth at the bar, Peter eventually stands up to them by making a speech about how much that booth means to him, including cutaways to his reaction for certain historic events:
      "I was in this booth when the Challenger exploded!"
      Cutaway: "Oh my god, no!"
      "I was in this booth on 9/11!"
      Cutaway: "Oh my god, no!"
      "I was in this booth when Obama was elected!"
      Cutaway: "Oh my god, no!"
    • In "Something, Something, Something Dark Side", Han (Peter) admits to Darth Vader (Stewie) that Luke (Chris) is on Dagobah, the rebels have a base on Kashyyyk, and he clogged the toilet on the 16th floor. Vader is incensed by the last one because he was forced to use the ugnaught restroom.
  • The Fight for the FoxBox has Michelangelo of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles say this in response to hearing that the FOX Box has been knocked off the air: "We've fought evil ninjas, evil robots, evil monsters... but cancelling my Saturday Morning Cartoons?! That's the evillest evil ever!"
  • The Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends episode "Bus the Two of Us" is about Bloo taking Mac for a joyride in the Foster's bus without Frankie's knowledge. They try to make it back as fast as possible without Frankie finding out. Needless to say, hilarity, and, this being Bloo, major lawbreaking, ensue. Unfortunately, Frankie sees the multiple police cars that followed them home. Over the end credits, she delivers her fury unto him with the following list of all the crimes he committed in the day:
    "Driving without a license, lying on a job application, destruction of private property, destruction of PUBLIC property, illegal use of toilet plungers, AND calling me a heifer! I mean, HONESTLY, Bloo, what do you have to say for yourself?!
    • In another episode, the gang is complaining to Madame Foster about the sinister deeds of an imaginary friend she sold the house to.
      Frankie: Grandma, he's a crook! He locked us in the closet!
      Mac: He sold all the imaginary friends to make money and he's gonna turn Foster's into a casino!
      Mr. Herriman: He made me be his maid! (sniff) Called me his First Lady.
  • In an episode of the Animated Adaptation of Fraggle Rock, Gobo is exploring a cave and sees a sign warning him of a monster that lives there, that will "Bite your head off, stomp you till you're flat as a flapjack, and kick you into a bottomless pit from which you'll never return. And then, it will call you names."
  • Freakazoid!:
    • In "Hero Boy", Freakazoid's arch-nemesis Gutierrez creates an evil twin of Freakazoid who goes around spreading mischief and chaos. Later, a news reporter states that Freakazoid has been charged with the crimes of tax evasion, mail fraud, and impersonating a Shriner.
    • In "Island of Dr. Mystico", the eponymous villain goes into a They Called Me Mad! rant: "They called me mad, insane, Wendell!"
  • Fudêncio e Seus Amigos: It was a Running Gag that the news reporter would list a criminal's doings like murder, and then finishing with something irrelevant such as "composing a cellphone tune".
  • Futurama:
    • Policeman: "You're under arrest for child cruelty, child endangerment, depriving children of food, selling children as food and misrepresenting the weight of livestock."
      • When you think about it that one might also fit the description of Bread Milk Eggs Squick. note 
    • Richard Nixon plans to do this in "A Head In The Polls":
      Nixon: —and after I'm elected, I'll sell our children's organs to zoos for meat, AND I'LL CRAWL INTO PEOPLE'S HOUSES AT NIGHT AND WRECK UP THE PLACE! [Evil Laugh]
    • Zapp Brannigan, in peace talks with the Omicronians, comments that Popplers would go well with "gwackamole".
      Lrrr: STOP EATING OUR YOUNG! And it's pronounced "guacamole"!
  • Garfield and Friends did this a few times, especially in the U.S. Acres shorts. Usually, the last thing mentioned was the lineup/schedule of a rival TV network (the show aired on CBS).
    Roy: Wade's confessing his crimes.
    Orson: What crimes?
    Roy: So far, the sinking of the Titanic, the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, the Spanish-American War, and last season's NBC fall schedule.
    • Garfield also made a few pointed comments in "The Garfield Crime Files: Canine Conspiracy" about acts that should be considered criminal.
      Garfield: Like Benny "The Celery Stalk" Burlap, wanted for embezzlement, armed robbery, and buying a leisure suit after 1971.
      Garfield: Or Sam "The Spatula" Schmidlap, wanted for gambling, smuggling, and having one of those "Baby on Board" signs in his car windows.
    • And again, in "Arbuckle the Invincible":
      Garfield: Don't ever ask anyone to hit you over the head with a baseball bat.
      Garfield: Don't ever ask anyone to drop a ten-ton safe on you.
      Garfield: And especially don't ever sign a contract with an agent who dresses like that. That's really dangerous.
    • In the episode "Feline Felon," an America's Most Wanted parody shows one of the criminals is wanted for burglary, stealing the Klopman Diamond, and using a small child as a bookmark. Then another is wanted for robbery, extortion, and doing the Pennsylvania Polka in Rhode Island. Garfield's own list of crimes is more like "Arson, jaywalking and murder", as it starts with stealing baked goods and moves on to him stealing "a kiss", "third base" (during an actual baseball game), "the spotlight", and even "a fleeting glance" before showing him stealing peoples' pants.
    • In “Bigfeetz” after Jon has run into a tree in his excitement to find Bigfeetz, knocking himself unconscious, Garfield says he’ll go find a doctor, a nurse, or a caterer.
  • Generator Rex: At the end of "Rock My World", Rex lists the crimes Sebastian will be charged with:
    "Attempted murder, assault and battery, construction without a permit..."
  • Gravity Falls
    • In the episode "Dreamscapers", the gang is seen watching TV and discussing what Gideon has done to them.
      Mabel: Remember when I wouldn't date him and he tried to destroy us?
      Stan: He's always trying to trick me into giving him the Mystery Shack!
      Wendy: One time I caught him using my moisturizer.
    • From the same episode:
      Bill: Remember: reality is an illusion, the universe is a hologram, buy gold. BYYYYEEEE!
    • When Dipper looks up Bill Cipher in journal #3, a cryptogram behind Bill's picture translates into "LIAR, MONSTER, SNAPPY DRESSER".
    • In the first season finale "Gideon Rises," Stan laments in his Darkest Hour that he's got no money, no friends, and has nothing to do all day but watch infomercials for junk like the "Owl Trowel". Later, after Stan reveals to the town that Gideon's using micro-cameras to spy on them and guess their secrets with his "psychic powers," the sheriff arrests Gideon for corruption, fraud, and breaking the hearts of the townspeople.
    • Near the start of "Society of the Blind Eye", Mabel looks through her scrapbook and laments her bad luck with boys.
      Mabel: (points to a picture of Norman) Turned out to be gnomes... (points to Li'l Gideon) Child psycho... (points to Gabe) Made out with his own hands...
    • In a flashback in "A Tale of Two Stans", Stan angrily explains to his twin brother Ford what he's been through since they last saw each other.
      Stan: I've been to prison in three different countries! I once had to chew my way out of the trunk of a car! You think you've got problems? I've got a mullet, Stanford!
  • The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy:
    • In "Creating Chaos", Eris describes her and Billy's reign of chaos as tornadoes to the north, flash floods to the south, fire snows to the east, and leprechauns astride beaver-tailed babies to the west.
    • In "Complete and Utter Chaos", when Mandy gets the Apple of Discord she claims that she will control chaos, rule discord, be a dark and terrible queen, and she might punch Irwin in the mouth.
    • In "Happy Huggy Stuffy Bears", Eris offers Mandy a chance to work together, where they'll have control, power, and free chicken.
    • In "Bully Boogie", when the Boogeyman laments how children aren't as easily scared as they used to be, he blames cartoons, video games, and the tuba.
    • In Billy & Mandy Save Christmas, the path to Baron Von Ghoulish's castle is to go down Dead Man's Path, through the Crags of Endless Stabbing Pain, past the Tree of Evisceration, through the Cave of Horrible Smells, and through Lovable Pony Meadow. Subverted when Grim makes an off-hand comment about the ponies being violent.
  • Heavy Metal, from the segment Captain Sternn:
    Bailiff: Lincoln Sternn, you stand here accused of twelve accounts of Murder in the First Degree, fourteen counts of Armed Theft of Federation Property, Twenty-two counts of Piracy in High Space, Eighteen counts of Fraud, Thirty-Seven counts of Rape, and one moving violation. How do you plead?
  • Henry's Cat once found himself having to fight a terrifying three-headed dragon. The first head breathed fire, the second had huge, razor-sharp teeth, and the third was worst of all: it told very bad jokes.
  • In Hey Arnold! on the night before Arnold's Grandpa enters a big race.
    Grandpa: I could drop dead in that heat, or those man-eating sharks could get me or my deodorant could give out.
    • The episode where they go to the aquarium plays with this. The security guard rattles off a list such as no video cameras, no tapping on the glass, no feeding the fish, no diving in the shark tank, no smoking, no knives, no guns, no plastic explosives, but his most important rule is no skateboarding.
  • The beginning of "Hobo 13" from Invader Zim:
    Tallest Purple: Plasma-armed battle tanks, Maim-bots, death ray cannons, a sack of taquitos?!
    Zim: Just a few supplies I need to complete my mission.
  • Justin Hammer from Iron Man: Armored Adventures has one:
    "I would rather be doing other things right now: base jumping, swimming with sharks, chasing beautiful women. You know, dangerous things.
  • From the Justice League episode "The Brave and the Bold".
    Gorilla Grodd: Humans are slow, ugly, immoral, and have an unpleasant body odor.
    • From the episode "Eclipsed" when the Flash goes into Orson Welles mode and chews out a commercial director:
      Flash: This bites! Your commercial's stupid, you're a no-talent hack, and your donuts are stale!
  • Kaeloo:
    • In Episode 12, when the gang are discussing what a TV news channel needs, Mr. Cat suggests "blood, pathos, suffering... and a blonde".
    • In Episode 133, Pretty gives Kaeloo the reasons why nobody likes her: she talks to flowers, she doesn't earn money, and she wears woollen scarves.
    • In the episode "Let's Play Treasure Hunt", Kaeloo gets mad at Stumpy for not packing all the important things they needed for a camping trip: the tent, the sleeping bags, the flashlights, and the book of campfire songs.
    • In one episode, Stumpy wants to become a vampire, so Kaeloo explains to him the various downsides of being a vampire, such as that he has to sleep in a coffin, he'll be destroyed if he goes out in the sun, and that he won't be able to post selfies online anymore since vampires can't be seen in photos.
    • In Episode 72, Stumpy is turned into a genius and reveals his plans for the future: build a bomb capable of destroying the planet, Take Over the World, and change the show's name from "Kaeloo" to "Stumpy".
    • After being injected with Truth Serum, Bad Kaeloo admits to feeling inferior and less loved than regular Kaeloo, Mr. Cat talks about the abuse he received at home and his horrible body image, and Stumpy admits that... he enjoys wearing girl clothes and makeup when nobody is looking.
    • In Episode 91, Kaeloo re-dubs a clip of Mr. Cat speaking to say that he has low self-esteem, he has an inferiority complex, and his paws smell bad.
    • Kaeloo has a nightmare about what would happen in her show if it were realistic: Stumpy would be sent to a mental hospital for being insane, Mr. Cat would be locked up in an animal shelter for being a cat, and Pretty would have to work in retail to be able to afford the things she buys on the show.
  • On King of the Hill:
    • After Ladybird is put on the state's vicious dogs list:
      Dale: I, too, am on more lists than I care to mention... the CIA, the FBI, L.L. Bean...
    • When Hank finds out about his birthplace in "Yankee Hankie", Hank tells his father Cotton:
      Hank: Dad, it's your fault I was born in New York, that I can't drive my truck anymore, and that I tried a bagel and actually liked it!
    • When a recovery support group for smokers is shocked at finding out that Bobby was one of the Hills addicted to smoking too, Hank lashes against them. He says they're judgy and whine too much, and then he tells them that their coffee wasn't that good.
  • Inverted in League of Super Evil when the villains attempt to provoke Justice Gene by breaking various ordinances. They include dancing on a crosswalk, offering brownies without nuts, using a fish as a phone, and digging without a permit.
  • The Life and Times of Juniper Lee:
  • The Little Lulu Show episode, "Prisoner Exchange", had Tubby's Criminal Doppelgänger, Marty the Midget, who is wanted for burglary, kidnapping, grand theft auto, and worst of all, not looking both ways before crossing the street.
  • This exchange in The Little Mermaid (1992): during the episode "Scuttle".
    Pirate 1: Hoist the sails!
    Pirate 2: Batten those hatches!
    Pirate 3: Trim that beard!
  • As seen above with Nasty Canasta in Drip-Along Daffy, many Western-themed Looney Tunes shorts had wanted posters with the outlaw's offenses listed as "bank robbery, cattle rustling, and square-dance calling." Adding to that, another poster listed the third crime as square dancing in a roundhouse.
    • Possibly inspired by this, the 'Wanted Poster With Your Face On It' souvenir available at Legoland's 'Western' section features a long list of crimes ending with " robbery, cattle rustling, horse theft, and kicking little old ladies in the knee."
  • Also used in the Looney Tunes classic "What's Opera, Doc?", when Elmer uses his Magic Helmet to attack Bugs Bunny with "Typhoons! Hurricanes! Earthquakes! SMOG!!"
    • To be fair, smog is quite toxic.
    • A non-lethal example: the Porky Pig cartoon "Get Rich Quick Porky" (1937) has Porky taking a bag of money to the bank. His sidekick Gabby Goat entreats him to use it to buy a car, or yacht, or a trip to Europe, or a chocolate sundae.
    • In "The Adventures of the Road Runner," the Coyote answers a young viewer's question about why he wants to catch the Road Runner:
      Coyote: Actually, the Road Runner is to the taste buds of a coyote what filet mignon, champagne, caviar and chocolate fudge are to the taste buds of a man.
  • In The Loud House episode, "Driving Miss Hazy", Leni failed her driving test for the 14th time due to Lori's sabotaging for failing to check her mirrors, driving on the left side of the road, and commenting on the driving instructor's weight.
  • Coop of Megas XLR was fond of this method. Once an Episode, he'd confront the Monster of the Week, and deliver a long monologue with the following format:
    Coop: All right you intergalactic snots! You busted up my car show!
    Jamie: Yeah!
    Coop: You wrecked my friends' rides!
    Jamie: Yeah!
    Coop: AND! You made me run half a block!
    Jamie: Yeah! (Record Scratch) Wait-Half a block?
    Coop: Now, it's payback time!
    • A classic:
      Coop: Listen up you dorky-sounding, ice-grubbing, robotic chump! You dinged my chrome, made me break my window AND snapped my favourite key! (Ator clears his throat) Oh yeah. You also tried to cut up the planet of the space Bigfoots...
    • Often things were included in the list that weren't the villain's fault, usually things Coop himself had caused.
      Coop: This alien chick thinks she can get my ride towed, make me go to the DMV and take a road-test? I DON'T NEED NO STINKING ROAD TEST!
      Jamie: Eh, dude, none of that stuff is her fault.
      Coop: Yeah...Well she's still trying to kidnap Kiva, that ain't cool neither.
    • And once it was all HIS fault.
      Coop: Listen here, you walking water heater. YOU guys attacked me.
      Jamie: Nope, that was you.
      Coop: YOU screwed up my warp drive.
      Kiva: You did that too.
      Coop: AND you made me miss the Monster Truck combat of the century!
      Jamie: Again, all you.
      Coop: Ya mind? I'm on a roll here.
    • Coop lampshades this in an episode where he's yelling this at the Glorft leader who is actually on his side:
      Gorrath: Are you talking to me? I'm on your side now, remember?!
      Coop: Oh. Sorry, force of habit.
      • Interesting note: that latter actually happened during the Crimean War, where the elderly Lord Raglan would repeatedly call the enemies "the French", despite the fact that the French were now on his side and they were fighting the Russians.
    • In Magnanimous's second appearance:
      Kiva: I knew there was something more to this than some stupid fight. This is about revenge!
      Magnanimous: It's about more than that, red. You put me in a quantum singularity, destroyed my empire, made me broke, and gave me this twitch. (eye twitches) It's about hurting you and I wish to go on hurting you, so I am going to humiliate you live. And while I'm at it, I think I might do a little destruction number on this planet of yours!...Oh wow, I guess it is about revenge.
  • Metalocalypse:
    Skwisgaar: [after an attempted attack on Dethklok] Dude, where's are we's?! What the *pinch harmonic* we just flies in?! ...what the hell was wrong with your guitar sounds tonight?
  • In the Mother Goose and Grimm episode "The Wickedest Witch" when Mother Goose has been turned into a frog by a witch, Grimm doesn't recognize her and tells her she’d better leave because Mom doesn't like slimy things in the house, like frogs, snakes, and insurance salesmen.
  • ¡Mucha Lucha! gives us the gem:
    Tibor the Terrible: He called me a pirate! Plundering, scavenging, downloading MP3s!
    • Of course, in the whole series, masked wrestlers fight for "Honor... family... tradition... AND DONUTS!"
  • My Life as a Teenage Robot
    • In "Unlicensed Flying Object", Tucker scolds his brother Brad for fooling around with the controls of an alien spacecraft, saying "You're gonna blow us up, or vaporize us, or get us grounded!"
    • In "Hostile Makeover", after Jenny is turned into a raging behemoth by a Cluster parasite she contracted fighting Vexus, she hears Tuck's familiar scream of terror and we're shown a flashback of him screaming at being stuck on a stalled Ferris wheel in the episode "Raggedy Android", being in the above-mentioned alien ship with Brad, and Neapolitan ice cream.
    • In "Girl of Steal", when Jenny returns home after stealing a new multi-function MP3 player and accidentally creating a villainous alter ego in the process, she asks her mother if the latest emergency is over aliens, evil puppets, or the kid in her 3rd period who eats glue.
  • My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic:
    • In "Keep Calm and Flutter On", the protagonists list Discord's offenses from the previous season as turning Ponyville into a World Gone Mad, turning them into the opposite of their true selves, and making it rain chocolate milk without any whipped cream to go with it.
    • "Castle Mane-ia":
      • As the organ triggers various secret passages, Applejack is swapped for a statue, Rarity is tossed outside by Luna's throne, and a bowl of carrots pops up in front of Angel.
      • Later, when the girls are all separated, they all scream at terrifying things: Rainbow Dash at the scary suit of armor Applejack is swapped with; Applejack at a dragon statue on an outdoor ledge; Fluttershy at suddenly being alone; and Rarity at the bit of tapestry she accidentally ripped off.
    • In the two-parter episode "The Cutie Re-Mark", Twilight Sparkle ends up in different Bad Futures each dominated by a different villain. They go, in order: King Sombra, Queen Chrysalis, Nightmare Moon, Lord Tirek, Discord and... The Flim-Flam Brothers.
  • In an episode of the New Woody Woodpecker Show, Woody's car stalls near a conveniently placed bowling alley in the desert, run by none other than Buzz Buzzard, who offers a prize to who can beat him. Of course, being Buzz Buzzard who he is, he rigs the match completely so that he'll end up winning with a 300 score to keep with his reputation as "Champion" of the place. Turns out that, after he flees, Woody finds out his long list of offenses to the law, which includes "unlawful toenail clipping". But there's more: upon seeing this, he immediately calls the police on the phone and starts listing his offenses. At first, this trope is inverted, with Woody listing Buzz's crimes starting from the least severe like cussing and littering, and going up to the most severe with bank robbery. The donut-munching officer on the other end of the line pays no heed to any of these; only when he mentions: "but Officer, he parked in a no-parking zone!" do the cops decide to flock in on him and arrest him (he was trying to escape in Woody's stalled car).
  • Ninjago: Jay catching up Sensei Wu in the episode "The Green Ninja".
    Jay: Zane is a Nindroid, Nya is the Samurai, and Cole's a dancer.
  • In The Owl House when Eda is listing off the different magical creatures that have managed to escape into the human world.
    Eda: Yep! Griffins, vampires, giraffes,
    Luz: Giraffes?
    Eda: Oh yeah, we banished those guys. Buncha freaks.
  • Phineas and Ferb:
    • In "One Good Scare Ought to Do It", Doofenshmirtz realized that he brought Perry along when he tried to escape from him:
      Dr. Doofenshmirtz: Okay, let's make sure I didn't forget anything in my haste. Let's see, I've got my old basketball, the lamp, the Christmas lights, Perry the Platypus, the Disintivaporator, my golf clubs... PERRY THE PLATYPUS!? [Beat] THE DISINTIVAPORATOR!? [Beat] MY GOLF CLUBS!? I don't even play golf!
    • In "Phineas and Ferb's Quantum Boogaloo", Future!Candace accidentally creates a Bad Future in which Dr. Doofenshmirtz managed to rise to power on a tide of Moral Guardian hysteria. He turns Danville into a dystopia where fun and creativity are outlawed, children are kept in People Jars until adulthood, and Doof makes everyone else change their names to "Joe" so he doesn't have to bother memorizing them.
  • In an episode of Pinky and the Brain, the main characters are in Egypt observing an archaeological expedition in the Great Pyramid of Giza for Brain's latest scheme. Suddenly, a creepy Egyptian guy walks in on the archaeologists:
    Egyptian Guy: Beware! Beware, ignorant fools! To open the sacred burial chamber of Khufu is to invite a plague of misery upon humanity: fire shall rain down from the sky, locusts shall devour crops, the Olsen Twins...will make more movies.
    [Pinky and Brain gasp in horror]
    • In "The Pink Candidate", Brain was found guilty of "sedition, abuse of power and shoplifting".
    • In "Napoleon Brainaparte", an aristocrat tells his assistant (a hunchback) that to prepare for Bonaparte's return, he is to issue an order to "clear the streets of any undesirables, rabble-rousers, revolutionaries... in fact, anyone who looks really weird." Then he quickly adds, "Except you".
    • In "Whatever Happened to Baby Brain", Brain tells Pinky in preparation for his plan of impersonating a child actress so he'll make a lot of money, that he spent hours studying the cutest living things which include babies, puppies, and former New York mayor Fiorello La Guardia.
  • An episode of The Powerpuff Girls (1998) involved a Straw Feminist villain named Femme Fatale avoiding capture by the girls by claiming to be committing crimes in the name of women's rights. To counter this, Ms. Bellum and Ms. Keane gathered several female Townsville residents to talk to the girls:
    Bank Teller: Was Femme Fatale looking out for me when she stole from my bank?
    Policewoman: Was she looking out for me when she broke my arm?
    Teenager: Was she looking out for me when she stole my hairstyle? (everyone glares at her) Well, she did!
    • Another episode shows Mojo Jojo robbing a bank, a jewelry shop and... a DVD store.
    • In the episode "Impeach Fuzz", when the Girls and Ms. Bellum try to convince The Mayor to take back his rightful position, they tell him that Fuzzy won't let the Girls fight crimes, has turned his office into a literal example of a pigsty, is tarnishing the image of what it is to be the Mayor, and is wearing his hat. That last one is The Mayor's Berserk Button.
    • From the episode "Just Desserts", when Mrs. Smith shows Mr. Smith the features of the Smith Family Mini-van:
      Mrs. Smith: All-terrain slash-proof white-wall tires, blinding 3000-watt headlights, five turbo jet engines for optimum speed, six liquid titanium rocket launchers, rotating laser cannon turret, and a spacious leather interior that comfortably seats a family of four.
    • In the episode "Not So Awesome Blossom", one of Mojo Jojo's robots destroys the Museum of Fine Arts, the Opera House, and a 98¢ store.
    • In the episode "I See a Funny Cartoon in Your Future", Madame Argentina goes to a voodoo shop and buys three voodoo dolls of the Powerpuff Girls, a box of pins, and a box of gumdrops.
    • At the end of "Monkey See, Doggy Do", Mojo Jojo gets turned into a dog after the Anubis head's spell breaks. The girls ask the Professor if they can keep him as a pet, and the Professor tells them that they'll have to keep him from causing mayhem, chaos, and chewing the furniture.
  • In The Powerpuff Girls (2016), Mojo flashes back to him trying to deliver the girls a tainted pizza covered with evil ingredients: Forbidden artichokes of the Sahara, Transylvanian wurst pepperoni, broccoli of the doomed, and pineapple, just because he likes it.
  • In the Ready Jet Go! episode "Earth Camping', Mr. Peterson, Jet, Mitchell, and Carrot get lost in the middle of the woods on their camping trip. Carrot reveals that he has been marking their trail with Mitchell's jellybeans, but then a nearby squirrel comes and eats up the jellybeans that Carrot had laid.
    Mitchell: Hey, that squirrel took all my jellybeans!
    Jet: This is bad. He's eating our trail markers back to camp!
    Carrot: Plus, his teeth are gonna be just awful if he doesn't brush.
  • In Red Hot Riding Hood, the wolf offers Red the following if she would just go with him:
    I will give you diamonds, furs, ermine. I will even give you a new set of white sidewall tires.
    • Red Hot Riding Hood came out in 1943, or, in other words, during World War II. Rubber was one of the several substances that were rationed as part of the war effort. It still fits the trope, but it's not quite as incongruous as it seems today.
  • Regular Show has Mordecai going through the contents of Death's fridge.
    Mordecai: Soul juice... goat's feet... Ewww! Almond milk!
  • The Ren & Stimpy Show: In "Sven Hoek", Ren is furious when he finds Stimpy and Sven have wrecked the house while he was out, and threatens to rip off their lips, gouge their eyes out, tear their arms out of their sockets... then push them over and laugh at them.
  • In the Rocket Monkeys episode "Zombie Bananas", when Wally and Gus are attacked by Lord Peel's zombified primates they exclaim "Zombie baboons! Zombie gibbons! Zombie chrysanthemum!"
  • Rocky and Bullwinkle:
    • In the "Buried Treasure" story, Boris' alias "Babyface Braunschweiger" is a notorious forger, thief, bank robber, gunman, and litterbug.
    • The start of the "Wossamotta U." portends disaster for the university — enrollment is down 80%, the buildings are crumbling...and they're taking the Coke machine out of the faculty lounge! (sob!)
  • Rugrats:
    • From "The Legend of Satchmo":
      Grandpa Lou: "Some folks call him 'Bigfoot', others call him 'The Abominable Snowman', the rest just call him 'Sir'."
    • From "Tommy and the Secret Club":
      Angelica: "If you don't remember to ask for the password, anyone could just waltz right in! Count Draculator, Sandman Husseiney, or even Chuckie!"
    • From "The Mega Diaper Babies":
      Angelica (as Angelitron): "Now, prepare for battle! Order out my robot army, unleash my zombie warriors, release our secret weapon, and get me more cheese balls!"
    • From "The Sky is Falling":
      Angelica: "First, the sky fell, then rivers overflowed, mountains crumbled, and finally, all the TV shows were cancelled."
      (Tommy, Chuckie, Phil, and Lil all gasp)
  • In the Sheep in the Big City episode "The Wool of the People", General Specific finds to his frustration that he can't capture Sheep because of a new law defending his rights. The general then gets the idea of going around the restriction by running for mayor, listing the advantages as being able to repeal the pro-sheep law, using his power to capture Sheep and use him in the sheep-powered ray gun once he's banned sheep from the city, and being able to have all the ice cream he wants.
  • The Simpsons:
    • One prime example is when Burns chews out Homer after reviewing his performance record for the last ten years, citing "causing seventeen meltdowns, selling plutonium to the Iraqis without any markup, and taking the Hamburglar's birthday off last Monday and Wednesday! Which is it?"
    • In "Bart Gets Hit By a Car", Bart has a near-death experience in which he goes to Hell. On his way out, the Devil advises Bart to "Lie, cheat, steal, and listen to heavy metal music!"
    • Burns complains in "Last Exit to Springfield" about having to deal with the plant workers' union. "Benefits, perks, a green cookie on St. Patrick's Day?"
    • "Homer vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandment": Homer imagines himself being sentenced to prison for assault, manslaughter, and stealing cable TV.
    • "Treehouse of Horror III", "Clown Without Pity": Homer buys Bart a talking Krusty the Clown doll for his birthday. The proprietor of the House of Evil where he gets it warns him that the doll is cursed, the free frogurt that comes with it is also cursed, and the frogurt's toppings, which Homer can choose from, all contain preservatives.
    • "Treehouse of Horror IX", "Hell Toupée": Snake gets three strikes, The first two were for torching an orphanage and blowing up a bus full of nuns. His third strike? Smoking in a No Smoking Zone.
    • "Treehouse of Horror XVIII" had a sight gag version of this. As Ned Flanders is granted the power to make a mystical Hell House which shows the children of Springfield the wages of sin in Hell, he shows them the Seven Deadly Sins. While Homer is certainly a glutton and is consumed by spaghetti, and Willy shows Wrath and is beheaded by the machine he was futilely kicking, poor Dr. Hibbert is shown proudly sticking a "My Child Made the Honor Roll" bumper sticker on his car. He is immediately crushed by a truck driven by Mole Man and dies in agony for the sin of Pride.
    • In "How I Spent My Strummer Vacation", when Marge mentions that she's taking Homer to somewhere where the family won't bother him again, Homer watches terrified as they drive past a mental institution, a slaughterhouse, and a Santa's Village.
    • In "Funeral for a Fiend", Sideshow Bob defends his case of attempting to kill Bart by asking the jury about the bad things Bart has done to them.
      Luigi: He ordered pranks pizzas to 888 Poopypants Lane. Everybody knows Poopypants Lane ends in the 700 block!
      Cletus: He mocked my folksy ways!
      Homer: He cheats at Uno!
    • In "Stop or My Dog Will Shoot", Bart has a fantasy of being approached by expies of Pinhead and Jason Voorhees, then by a giant math book before Santa's Little Helper (as RoboCop) comes to save him.
  • Sonic the Hedgehog:
    • Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog:
      • In the official first episode "The Super Special Sonic Search and Smash Squad", Robotnik lists to his robots Sonic's offenses; ruining his schemes, escaping his traps, and helping nice people.
      • From the episode, "Spaceman Sonic":
        Dr. Robotnik: "You lost my rocket ship, you let the hedgehog foil my plans again, AND NOW YOU'RE RUNNING UP MY LONG-DISTANCE BILL!"
      • From the episode, "Birth of a Salesman":
        Dr. Robotnik: "Listen, Weasley, you are brash, arrogant, obnoxious, pushy, rude, and you dress funny. You're my kind of guy!"
      • The weapons detector in the episode "Mass Transit Trouble" has settings for bombs, guns, knives and spitballs.
      • In the episode "Coachnik", Robotnik puts every kind of explosive in his long bomb, with the final one being a well-shaken can of soda.
    • Sonic Boom:
      • The robot fireman at the beginning of the episode "Buster" does the exact opposite of everything a good fireman does. He sets things on fire, puts a baby walrus in a burning house, and puts a cat in a tree.
      • At the beginning of the episode "My Fair Sticksy", Sticks has defense systems for meteors, wildfires, floods, and people trying to read her thoughts.
      • In the episode "Don't Judge Me", Sticks claims that Dr. Eggman's machines destroy mountains, level cities, and put songs in your head that you can't get out.
      • In the episode "Mayor Knuckles", when Knuckles abuses his power as mayor by approving too many laws, Sonic and his friends team up with Dr. Eggman to stop him. As retribution, Knuckles outlaws boomerangs, hammers, inventions, spin attacks, and mayonnaise.
      • From the episode "Unnamed Episode", when Sticks finds out that the unnamed village used to be named by her great-great-grandfather, Jebediah Badger:
        Sticks: Jebediah Badger stood for everything I hate in this world; abuse of power, oppression, shoddy sign construction...
  • South Park:
    • This trope is probably why "and she has stupid hair" is one of the funniest lines in the "Kyle's Mom is a Bitch" song.
    • In "Freak Strike," Cartman in his out-of-control persona claims to belong to twelve gangs that only commit hate crimes; to have run for Congress, won, then had sex with an intern, killed her, and hid the body; and to have digitally edited Jabba the Hutt into Star Wars.
    • In the movie's trailer, we get this funny bit:
      Mr. Garrison: Eric, did you just say the F word?
      Sheila Broflovski: Did he say the S word?
      Mr. Mackey: Young man, did you just say the Q word?
    • Also from The Movie, we have Cartman's string of swears at the climax:
      Cartman: Fuck! Shit! Cock! Ass! Titties! Boner! Bitch! Muff! Pussy! Cunt! Butthole! Barbra Streisand!
    • In the Jewpacabra episode:
      Cartman: You can't scare a Jewpacabra, Butters. Don't forget we're dealing with a creature that drinks blood, hides in the night and has absolutely no belief in the divinity of Christ
    • Cartman in the episode "Scott Tenorman Must Die", where he has Scott's parents killed, grinds their corpses into chili which he then feeds to Scott and causes Scott to cry in front of his favorite band. Who then call him a "crybaby".
  • SpongeBob SquarePants:
    • Squidward talks about the Hash-Slinging Slasher, who accidentally cut off his own hand:
      Squidward: And he replaced his hand with a rusty spatula. And then, he got hit by a bus! And at his funeral, they fired him!
    • There's also the scene where the Flying Dutchman, trying to be scary again, haunts Squidward with a series of freakish nightmares, including his own mother asking why he hasn't called her and then melting, and a giant SpongeBob dissolving into a pile of spiders. The scene ends with the Flying Dutchman doing the old severed finger magic trick, to which Squidward screams "No! Noooo! That's impossible!" and runs away terrified.
    • In "No Free Rides", Mrs. Puff steals SpongeBob's boatmobile, and they go through three road signs. One says "Giant Clams", but SpongeBob goes through it anyway. The next one says "Cheese Graters" and he survives through the giant cheese graters. But when they reach "Educational Television"...
      SpongeBob: "Educational television?!" OH, NO!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
    • In "Once Bitten", a concerned Squidward, after having just been bitten by Gary, asks SpongeBob whether Gary had all of his shots in order. The shots he lists are "rabies, snailpox, soft shell dance, bagitis, lumpy bump trump, and teen angst."
    • In "Sandy, SpongeBob, and the Worm", SpongeBob describes the Alaskan Bull Worm as "Big, Scary, and Pink."
      Sandy: So's Patrick's belly-button, but I ain't afraid of that neither!
    • "Life of Crime":
      Patrick: Confess!? Are you out of your mind!? Do you have any idea what they do to people like us? We're not talking about some dumb mail fraud scheme or hijacking here! WE STOLE A BALLOON!
    • "Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy V": After Barnacle Boy, Man Ray, and the Dirty Bubble defeat Mermaid Man and the other superheroes (or, rather, the latter defeated themselves), Barnacle Boy delivers his list of demands to his former mentor.
      1. I want to be treated like a superhero, not a sidekick.
      2. I want to be called "Barnacle Man".
      3. I want an adult-sized Krabby Patty.
    • In "Nautical Naughty Neighbors" when SpongeBob describes the bath scene:
      SpongeBob: My best friend, my ex-best friend, and... RUBBER BATH TOYS!
    • And another scene after Patrick interrupts SpongeBob's singing and SpongeBob throws a huge tantrum:
      SpongeBob: (Strumming violently before slamming bassinet into floor) And Patrick is a dirty, stinky, rotten, friend STEALER!
    • In "Hooky" Mr. Krabs warns SpongeBob about the hooks and what happens if he gets caught.
      Mr. Krabs: First they cook ya, and then they eat ya! Or worse!
      SpongeBob: What could be worse than that?
      Mr. Krabs: Gift shops.
    • In "Krab-Borg," Squidward and SpongeBob confront the "robot" Mr. Krabs, intent on interrogating him:
      Mr. Krabs: Oh. Hello, boys! What can I do for you? Why did you lock the door? Why do you have that rope? WHO'S WATCHING THE CASH REGISTER?
    • In the episode "Krabs à la Mode" when Mr. Krabs confronts Plankton:
      Mr. Krabs: [gasps] You've gone too far this time, Plankton. You can pound me employees, [punches SpongeBob through the gut] try to destroy me restaurant, but nobody messes with me thermostat.
    • From "Pizza Delivery":
      Squidward: Well, you backed up. And you know what? I think we're out of gas! And, you know what else? We're in the middle of nowhere!
      SpongeBob: And you know what else else? I think the pizza's getting cold.
      Squidward: And the pizza's COLD! Oh, the pizza's cold! Not the pizza!
    • In "Sing a Song of Patrick", SpongeBob and Patrick take over Bikini Bottom's main radio station to play Patrick's newly-written song. The song ends up making the entire town so irritated that they start an angry mob, complete with vendors giving the entire crowd torches, pitchforks, and cotton candy.
    • In "Pest of the West", when Dead-Eye Plankton runs SpongeBuck out of Bikini Gulch, SpongeBuck later comments that he's run out of food, water and lip balm.
    • In "Pineapple Invasion", when SpongeBob comes home and sees it in a mess after Gary's quarrel with Plankton, they're shown to have knocked over SpongeBob's first Krabby Patty (which he had bronzed), shredded his Mermaid Man underwear, and knocked over his glass of water.
    • In "Clams", Mr. Krabs goes into a deep depression when he loses his millionth dollar to a giant clam. SpongeBob and Squidward volunteer to help him get it back, and he refuses to let them go back home until they get it back. Squidward tries to pass off one of his own dollars as Mr. Krabs' millionth dollar, but Mr. Krabs soon finds out that Squidward's dollar has been crumpled up, torn slightly, soaked in a lagoon, and kissed with Coral Blue #2 Semi-Gloss lipstick.
    • Inverted in "Bubble Buddy". The crimes leveled against Bubble Buddy include spending too much time in the bathroom, calling others fat, washing Pearl's flipper, owing Krabs money, demanding excellent customer service from Squidward, letting one of the beachgoers drown, and bringing famine and plague unto Bikini Bottom. It should be noted that the final one is also a complete lie (but it could happen!).
    • In "Kracked Krabs", three crabs were nominated for Cheapest Krab and show different videos of their cheapness. In the first, Mr. Krabs scams the customers into believing he's giving away free Krabby Patties, then charges them a dollar per footstep. For the second, Beuford BargainBottom scans a grocery three times, because it's "three times the flavor", thus three times the price. In the third video, Dwight T. Wadd, unlike the others, simply ties used toilet paper onto a clean roll.
    • From "The Secret Box":
      SpongeBob: What could be in that box that Patrick doesn't want me to see? Maybe it's the world's only albino jellyfish! Or maybe Patrick's a master jewel thief and it's full of diamonds. Or maybe Patrick's a deranged maniac who keeps his victims' severed heads in a box! Or even worse... maybe it's an embarrassing snapshot of me from the Christmas party! AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!note 
  • This bit from the episode, "wej Duj" of Star Trek: Lower Decks when Shaxs remembers his tone in the Bajoran Resistancewhile making pottery:
    Shaxs: I'm going to fight! I'm going to get revenge! I'm... going to make a cute little ashtray for my incense. It's going to look like a puppy.
  • Similar to one of the Juniper Lee examples, in the Star vs. the Forces of Evil episode "Crystal Clear", the prisoners that Rhombulus has preserved in crystals include a guy who destroyed a planet, a girl who was in the process of creating a black hole, and a pizza guy who delivered to the wrong address.
  • Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Invoked, rather than played straight, in "To Catch a Jedi". While Ahsoka is on the run after being framed for bombing the Jedi Temple, she recalibrates a holobooth's frequency to prevent anyone from tracing her transmission. Seeing that, Ventress sarcastically remarks that by doing so, Ahsoka is adding another act to her own criminal record — a record which by that point includes sedition, terrorism and multiple murders.
  • Star Wars Rebels: In "Rebel Resolve", a shot's shown of Kanan's wanted file. His crimes are listed as "Theft of Imperial supplies, resisting arrest, assaulting officers, piloting without license."
  • Used in the Static Shock episode "The Big Leagues", when Static apprehends Ferret:
    Static: Let's see, so far I have you down for robbery, vandalism, and excessive cruelty to produce.
  • In the Steven Universe episode "Catch and Release", the Crystal Gems manage to capture Peridot and take her back to the temple. When Steven frees her to ask her more questions about "the Cluster", Peridot tries to slap Steven silly because "You smashed me into a limbless clod, you trapped me in your bubble dungeon, and... you called me cute!"
  • Superjail! has Jared announce that DJ Diamond was "wanted for countless crimes from petty theft to necrocide. He has impersonated the handicapped, assaulted a donkey, grafittied the elderly, swallowed gum..."
  • In the Sylvester And Tweety Mysteries episode "Bull Running on Empty", the criminal is arrested for "stealing the Pamplona Periscope, kidnapping Senor Gabriel, and failing to use a good underarm deodorant."
  • TaleSpin:
    • In "Louie's Last Stand", Douglas "Dougie" Benson, one of Shere Khan's employees, attempts to evict Louie from his island by forging Khan's signature on a document authorizing the Khan Pilot Force to do whatever he says. When Khan finds out, he fires Benson for forgery, misuse of company property, and his soot-covered suit not being up to the company dress code.
    • In "Bringing Down Babyface", after Baloo and Babyface Half-Nelson escape from the police, Officer Malarkey calls for backup, telling them, "Suspects are armed, dangerous, and wearing festive party hats."
  • Teen Titans (2003):
    • One episode Robin and Cyborg getting angry and insulting each other. Cyborg's is: "You're bossy, you're rude, you have no taste in music!"
    • There's also Killer Moth's ultimatum to the city, in which he'll unleash his army of mutant moth monsters unless the city declares him its ruler, the Teen Titans surrender, and Robin takes "this lovely young woman" (Killer Moth's extremely spoiled daughter) to the prom.
    • While phrased in a humorous manner, Starfire's first three reasons for why she feels left out when her sister visits are understandable.
      I am happy to see her, but Blackfire rules the video games and she is able to share very depressing poems and she knows the cool moves and she always knows when people are not talking about shovels.
    • In the episode "Switched", this is combined with an I Take Offense to That Last One! after Starfire and Raven are the victims of a "Freaky Friday" Flip, courtesy of the Puppet King:
      Starfire: (As Raven): But what if they find us? What if our friends are doomed? What if I'm stuck looking like this forever?!
      Raven: (As Starfire): We'll fix it. I don't know how, but we will rescue the boys and we will get our bodies back. (Beat) What's wrong with the way I look?
      Starfire:: (Beat) Nothing.
    • In the episode "Lightspeed", there's the list of the HIVE Five's potential targets.
      Gizmo: We got multiple targets: an armored car on Main, three jewelry stores, and a taco stand.
  • In Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987):
    • In "The Maltese Hamster", a mobster uses a tractor beam device given to him by Shredder to find the eponymous Hamster. Its settings include Toys, Home Furnishings, Men's Underwear, and Antiques.
    • In "New York's Shiniest", robot police officer REX-1 had this to say to some security guards:
      REX-1: You are charged with disturbing the peace.
      Guard 1: Put us down you hunk of tin!
      REX-1: Resisting arrest.
      Guard 2: You ain't never getting away with this.
      REX-1: And using a double negative.
    • Casey Jones does this in his premiere episode. The crimes committed by the villains he stops includes: breaking-and-entering, attempted theft, armed robbery, loitering, and ripping off Casey's costume idea.
      Casey Jones: Trademark infringement? How low can ya get?
    • In the crossover movie, Turtles Forever, the 2003 Turtles explain exactly how bad their Shredder is to their 1987 counterparts:
      Leonardo: You don't understand. The Utrom Shredder isn't like your Shredder. He's vicious...
      Donatello: Lethal...
      Michaelangelo: COMPETENT!
  • In the Thomas & Friends episode "No More Mr. Nice Engine", Sir Topham Hatt scolds Hiro for causing confusion and delay, and for spilling milk all over his trousers.
  • Tiny Toon Adventures:
    • In the short, "The Learning Principal" (part of "Looniversity Daze"), the Great and Powerful Principal tries to think of an appropriate punishment for Buster for disrupting Yosemite Sam's class. He considers boiling him in oil, stretching him out on a rack, and confiscating his stereo.
    • In the "Night Ghoulery" special, during the "The Devil and Daniel Webfoot" sketch, Mr Scratch presents his Jury of the Damned to Plucky, consisting of some of the most vile scum to ever walk the Earth; Pirates, Thieves, Traitors, and Network Executives.
    • Within the same special, during the "Frankenmyra and Dizzygor" sketch, Elmyra orders Dizzy to fetch a brain for her monster. While he doesn't find a brain, he does find a spleen, a pancreas, and some frozen waffles.
  • Used memorably in The Transformers, in the episode where the Decepticons sent Big Bad Galvatron into therapy for being too Ax-Crazy. In word association therapy:
    Therapist: Just say anything that comes to mind.
    Galvatron: Kill! Smash! Destroy!
    Therapist: Continue.
    Galvatron: Rend! Mangle! Distort!
  • In an episode of Top Cat where Officer Dibble has been replaced by another, even more strict, cop, T.C. convinced said cop that city's mayor is Cha-cha Charlie, a gangster wanted by police for extortion, smuggling and leading a dance school without permission.
  • On one episode of Total Drama Island, a monsoon hits Wawanakwa, and the inevitable flood washes the campers away. Owen, who's been in the confessional outhouse, finds said outhouse floating in the lake and delivers this gem:
    "I'm all alone! Adrift at sea! Without breakfast!"
  • Tuca & Bertie: In the episode "Bird Mechanics", Bertie attempts to calm her anxiety by repeating words that her partner, Speckle, is saying. The words end up being "brutalist", "skeletal", and "paperwork".
  • In the T.U.F.F. Puppy episode "Snappy Campers", the camp is surrounded by a nuclear reactor, a dynamite factory and an 88¢ store. Subverted in that the 88¢ store sells bombs for 88¢ each.
  • Uncle Grandpa has Card-Carrying Villain Evil Wizard deciding if he should demolish a pet store, set fire to an orphanage, destroy the planet, or mess with Eddie.
  • From VeggieTales, there's this exchange at the ending (or lack thereof) of "The Song of the Cebu":
    Archibald: Wait! What happens next?
    Larry: Um...
    Archibald: Does the hippo see them? Is the poor mute cebu successful in communicating the imminent danger to the other passengers? Is the boy injured? Why is the sad cebu sad? Is the canoe wood...or aluminum?
    • And in another episode, the Babylonian priests' song where they're plotting against Daniel. In between proposing to have him thrown in jail or eaten by a crocodile, one of them comes up with the idea to give him jelly donuts and then take them away.
  • From The Venture Bros.:
    Gary: I've seen my only real friend die, I've seen a giant panty roll over a guy dressed up like a rainbow, I've seen the Donkey Kong kill screen, I've seen attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion...
  • In The Wacky Adventures of Ronald McDonald episode "Scared Silly", Grimace sends a message to Ronald telling him he's too scared to watch any more television. Every channel he turns to is playing movies involving vampires, monsters, and baby ducks.
  • Wave Twisters: The Red Worm is wanted for crimes including firing at pedestrians from a moving vehicle (drive-bys), riding in a stolen baby carriage (jacking), urinating on an ant farm, set of figurines, magnifying lens and role-playing game (mayhem), slamming a man's head in a copy machine while making copies (copyright infringement), and repeatedly slapping a dog across the face in a train yard (dirty deeds).
  • We Bare Bears:
    • From the "Our Stuff" episode:
      Police Officer: This is the police, we have you surrounded! Give up now!
      Grizz: Hahaha, this is all a big mistake, we were just getting back our stuff, see? [Beat] Wait, what? Action Buddies? This isn't ours!
      Player #41: It's mine, dummy! I rented it an hour ago!
      Grizz: What the—? Uh hahaha, so innocent mistake, no harm no foul, right?
      Man in crowd: Those guys have been running around the city, destroying stuff!
      T-Shirt Salesman: They ruined my T-shirt stand!
      Waitress: Those guys came into my restaurant, and only ordered ice water!
      Grizz: Hey, we tipped!
      Waitress: Yeah, with a table mat drawing!
    • From "Food Truck", a park ranger fines the bears for feeding human food to the animals, selling without a permit, driving an unregistered truck, and disturbing the peace.
  • Xiaolin Showdown:
    • When Jack Spicer gets his hands on the Sands of Time, he plans to create an army made of the biggest villains in history. The first people he brings from the past are Attila the Hun (although he looks more like Genghis Khan), Blackbeard, Billy the Kid, and his first-grade teacher. Subverted when he travels to the future to bring his future self, double subverted when he brings a very old version of him who proves to be the least useful among them.
    • The three things Dojo learns not to talk about in the episode "Something Jermaine": religion, politics and Omi's head. Guess which one makes Omi glare at him.
    • In "Oil in the Family", after taking offence at being compared to a dinosaur, Dojo claims that dragons are better because they breathe fire, fly and chew with their mouths closed.
  • Glowface's minions in an episode of The X's are the Scream Queens, Sasquatch, the McVampires, Missing Link, Bio-Harold and Some Old Guy (who asks "Is this the nickel store?").