NOTE: This crossover liveblog, like a few others before, will be done in script format. Also, if the pothole doesn't give it away much, this liveblog is very much loosely inspired by A Day of One Hero, a mockumentary featuring one of the Gokaiger actors.
As such, no celebrities were harmed in the writing of this liveblog, and all references to said celebrities are purely coincidential. Please do enjoy.
(We open to a blank bedroom, with Rika researching...)
Rika: So a shittier fanfic than Super Sentai vs. Power Rangers exists, huh? Well...as much as I don't want to liveblog it, or even read it—I mean, I have a friggin' backlog of other liveblogs I need to do right about now—I suppose I can check it out.
(She types in the words "Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger vs. Power Rangers Samurai" in Google, and...)
(One hour later...)
Oh my. Holy fucking shit. :|
Just by reading the prologue, it's so bad...just...why? I don't get it. I honestly don't understand...gah.
I officially don't understand why hate fics exist. I really fucking don't.
(...she then sees that she has people)
From the batshit insane mind that brought you so many liveblogs comes...yet another damn crossover. Again.
As anyone would know, I actually find crossovers to be intriguing, even though I'm not a huge fan of them. It's because any crossovers I find, they're usually shittastic. If it doesn't suck because of the things that cross over with them, then it sucks because of the execution of what would have been interesting ideas.
All I'm saying is, crossovers can be pretty hard to pull off successfully. Me, I've used tons of crossover ideas, but never to their full fruition. So yeah, I know how hard it can be!
But then you get crossovers where they just...bash one side and glorify the other. And yes, I know I've tackled that shit before, five times, as a matter of fact! But...with this...I think I may lose the will to be sarcastic, folks. Because while The Prayer Warriors gave me loads of material to work with...
This doesn't. This really doesn't. And the worst part is, it's ridiculously short as hell, since it covers four real chapters.
(Rika then falls into a Heroic BSOD...)
(Meanwhile, at a random area, two men bump into one another, speaking a foreign language, until...)
Man #1: ...you know this is just a secret language, right? Just because you landed in this world, it doesn't mean you can speak the language all the time?
Man #2: Oh, right! Sorry, I was excited to meet you! One of the Sentai actors!
(The first man, oh, let's call him Ryota, nods to the second man, Sentai watcher and former Power Rangers actor, oh, Jason. They are later joined by two other Rangers actors, Alex and Rika's favorite gushing target, Sean...)
Ryota: ...those your friends?
Jason: They're Ranger actors, like me!
Alex: Jason, we're here, like you've said in the message.
Jason: Oh, right...
(Jason clears his throat, whereas Sean, not much of a talker, goes through his backpack, half-listening, half-making sure he has everything)
I was honestly thinking of doing our own little Power Rangers vs. Super Sentai storyline!
Ryota: What's it about?
Jason: Well, I've watched several Sentai shows, and I got the gist of them...I was thinking about a story that focuses on teamwork, about the differences we face, about the trials we go through! And we'll reprise our Ranger roles!
Alex: Sounds rather cool! (he turns to Sean, who is just staring at his backpack) What do you—?
(In Sean's backpack, there seems to be a random piece of fanfiction, one titled "Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger vs. Power Rangers Samurai")
Sean: ...how in the hell did that get in my backpack?
Alex: I dunno, did you print that off?
Sean: I never had it before. I...
(Then it whispers a demonic language, and the ex-Ranger actor sports an "oh, shit" expression)
Guys, I don't know what's going on, but I think we're in big trouble. I never had a piece of fanfiction whisper something at me.
(Ryota then grows serious)
Ryota: That's not normal. Give me the bag.
(Sean does so, and Ryota examines the contents)
I'll look at it, and figure out what's going on.
(the other men nod...)
(Back at Rika's room, she recovers from her BSOD)
Rika: So, where were we? Oh, yes.
This fanfic is said to be even worse than Super Sentai Vs. Power Rangers, and seeing it, I definitely know why.
So let's waste no time on it, as we'll liveblog...
Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger vs. Power Rangers Samurai!
So the story begins with, yes, the Author's Note.
- "After a long time, I finally decided to write a new crossover, but this time, this is a battle that I have planned for a long time but have not yet done."
By the way, the author of this fanfic is not Sean Akizuki, but rather, one Arnold McGuire 335. Who is he? Well, you remember when I stated how, in the Pooh's Adventures of the Princess and the Togepi liveblog, the author of that fanfic is a guy who prefers quantity over quality?
Same with this guy. He's written over 90 fucking fanfics, including this one. Most of them are fanfics of Disney and Nickelodeon shows, and unfortunately, yes, some of those are an adult nature.
Yes. Please use the Brain Bleach to your right.
But we're not going to talk about those. We're gonna be talking about this story in particular. Why? This is the type of crossover fic that's just chock-full of Writer on Board moments. You'll see why.
So the trailer starts, showing the 34 Sentai groups protecting world peace, from Gorenger to Goseiger...and then this shit happens.
- "However, what they didn't know… there are also impostors who are doing the same…"
And who are the "impostors"? The Power Rangers. Seriously.
...but I'm not going to cover that yet. Oh, no. I'm gonna save it for a future rant in another chapter.
So the trailer continues, showing the Gokaigers ready to face one of the "fake" groups. For example, Don thinks that the Samurai Rangers aren't the new Shinkengers.
Oh, and the Samurai Rangers? Get this, are you ready? They aren't succeeding the old Sentai groups, rather, Olies Gil is joining forces with them!
And do you know why, kids? Because they corrupt the minds of children everywhere!
One! Chapter! In! I mean...I don't like Samurai, but for fuck's sake! I think my wall needs a new coat of red!
(Rika then slams her head into a wall several times)
(Several minutes later...)
There. Now I'm done.
So after the Samurai Rangers strike a pose, we get that their mission is, yes, corrupting the minds, as if we didn't already fucking know.
Get ready to see that claim many, many times, kiddos.
Gai, the fanboy of Sentai, recognizes the Samurai Rangers, and...seriously? Are they seriously going to repeat, over and over again, that they're corrupting young minds?
Welp, time to do a drinking game! Take a shot when you see...
- The author bitching about how Power Rangers corrupts young minds.
- Said author saying how Super Sentai is true and pure, y'all!
Yeah, you'll get plastered in no time, but remember...
- Read the story very slowly.
- Always assign a designated driver.
So, with the Rangers doing their dirty work, by...pissing off the Toku loyalists...
We get a scene where it's just nothing but pointless bickering, fighting, and Breaking the Fourth Wall-ing. Yeah...I'm definitely going to get to that on the next chapter.
After the fight previews, the question remains. Is the truth going to be with the Gokaigers, or the Samurai Rangers? Who cares, because in the end, the truth (read: whoever the author wants to win) will win!
...also. I hate to be nitpicky, but I'm kinda sure that Captain Marvelous' catch phrase is "Let's make a show of it!". Not "Let's get showy!" Of course, I could be wrong...
And we end it all with Kevin breaking the fourth wall. Get it? Because they said "the truth will be Victorious", VicTORIous is a Nickelodeon show, and Power Rangers airs on the Nickelodeon stations! Ha-ha!
...ugh. How many chapters do we have of this shit? (3 more chapters) Oh, come on!
Will Rika be able to make it alive with her sanity intact, or will this be another Super Sentai vs. Power Rangers? And what of the fanfic appearing next to the Ranger and Sentai actors? Why is it there, and what does it want with them?
Emergency Signal, Now, Forward! To the next liveblog of Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger vs. Power Rangers Samurai!