Catherine: Out of all the things I didn't expect to happen...and the worst part is, aside from not going to save lives, I may not return in time to propose my girlfriend's hand in marriage.
Mako: Girlfriend?
Catherine: Yeah. Kotohime. You remind me of her, complete with the gentle attitude...and...well...
Mako: ?
Catherine: Well, like you, I'm sure, she had to learn how to cook—sorry!
Mako: It's okay. At least you didn't insult me or faked it like my teammates... (she shook her head)
(And yours truly returns, making the girls shut up. Carter and Matoi join a few seconds later)
Welcome back, livebloggers and readers.
Carter: Previously on Super Sentai Vs. Power Rangers...
...we meet the villains of the series. And we get an author tract about how much the Kalish seasons suck. That's basically all we got.
Matoi: I'm really hoping that my family will not get...butchered...by this.
I...hope not, either. :/
So let's move on with...
The story begins with an author's note detailing that it's getting polished up...okay. I should note that the rough draft has a few...rough patches. Also, at one point, the Operation Overdrive Rangers go onto a suicide mission. Which got deleted, so sadly, I won't bash the shit out of that.
In any event, it's said that one scene is copied from another fanfic. Aaaaaand there's our first official sign of quality, folks! Aside from the tracts, we get copypasting!
Admittedly, I haven't read Super Sentai Vs. Super Sentai, but I heard that it's really good. A lot better than...this.
Also, the author continues to say that the Jetmen—yes, them—will appear. Why? Because it's his favorite Sentai series of all time. Because they keep appearing in fresh plots.
...um...okay. I know that they made several more crossovers, even having Gai show up in Gokaiger. They even had a manga series. But it would be a stretch to say that they keep appearing in fresh plots.
Also, speaking of Gai, he's going to survive! Yay? And we'll get an explanation as to how he either survived or came back from the dead! Double yay?
Mako: After the author's note, we move to the year 2011, in our universe. We and the Goseigers parted ways after we defeated our respective foes.
To recap: Chiaki and Kotoha have school, as well as the former Head of the Shiba Clan, Kaoru. Rynnusoske, everyone's favorite Large Ham Blue Ranger, has moved from Kabuki to higher forms of acting, likely gaining roles as the hammy, memorable villain every time. Wait...where the fuck is Genta?
Oh, well, never mind, I'm sure that they'll tell us later.
Mako: Meanwhile, with the Goseigers and Go-Ongers facing evils, perhaps, I decided to stay in Tokyo and be with Takeru. And...I wouldn't even try to be like, well, this Mako that you see in this story.
Because Story!Mako asks Takeru if he is forgetting about their dinner, and the two prepare themselves. To go to a freaking European-themed dinner.
Um...okay? I'm sure that Story!Mako would easily make dinner for Takeru.
Oh, wait. Let me guess, Akizuki wants us to remember that Mako's a bad cook, and there's no way in Hell that that would get upgraded into something good.
Also, a little note. The story also has the characters listed with their full names. Every. Single. Fucking. One. Yeah, some characters have the same names (albeit different surnames), but is it really that hard to list, say, "Shinkenger!Takeru", or "Takeru S."?
Mako: Anyway, Takeru and the other Mako are lovey-dovey towards each other, complimenting how beautiful they look and how it's a long time for them to sit down and dine together.
Yeah, it's pretty much bland and very much meh. Because...is Mako really a lovesick puppy? I mean...really.
Then a waiter shows up and takes their orders. All while he speaks Gratutious French. We get the couple eating a few minutes later—wait. Before that...Story!Mako was playing with her iPod.
Huh.
More talking happens. Dear God, remember when I ranted a bit about how much the romantic subplot dragged on in Kickboxing Academy? This is exactly like that.
So to sum up the entire scene...Takeru reveals that Genta told him about the place before he left for "personal reasons". Then Mako becomes depressed, at first saying that it's nothing, but then Takeru catches on. He knows that Mako's missing the other Shinkengers.
Then he says, after he and Story!Mako recaps what they did, that they'll see the other Shinkengers again. One way or another. But soon, they realized that they just tempted fate.
Because as soon as they finish complimenting the choices for dinner, dessert, and flowers, enter the Jetmen! Ryu, Kaori, Gai, Ako, Raita, and Aya. Also, the story has to repeat that Aya's there. But hey, we get a reason: she's here with them in order to recruit Sentai warriors so they can fight a new evil.
Aya—I mean, Director Aya—announces to the Jetmen that they found their first recruits, and by damn, they need newer blood in order to help them! Ryu then realizes what he must do, and he walks over to Mako and Takeru.
After arriving, he introduces himself to the two Shinkengers, and he tells them that they were once young, but they're not getting any younger. Why does he say this? Because they're looking for new recruits, of course! But he would like to taste the thrill of the battle eventually.
Eh, you'll get your chance. Many fucking times.
Director Aya explains a bit more about the new alliance: Skyforce and Boukenger's Search Guard Successor Foundation (or as we all know, SGS) have been working together. Oh, and you'll just love the name of the Sentai alliance. Ready for this?
Mako: Sure, what is it? (is making a cake as Catherine's making tea)
The United Super Sentai Alliance. For fucking serious.
Mako: ...
Catherine: What.
Carter: Eh, it could be worse, to be fair.
When recruited, the younger Sentai Warriors will be used for the physical aspects. As for the older guys? Consultants. Despite the fact that most, young or old, can kick ass whenever they want.
Gai repeatedly answers that they need a younger task force (okay, Story!Mako, did you hear them the first fucking time?). Why this time? An old enemy has risen from the ashes, and he has a goal: you guessed it, destroying the universe.
Story!Mako thinks that it's crazy, but Takeru believes them. Oh, and the U.S.S.A, as I'll call them from now on, has already secured the Boukengers (well, duh, you're working with their group!), the Abarangers, and the Dekarangers. Ryu hands them a calling card if they need the group, and he hopes that they will join him. Ending the little segment, Takeru decides to give them a call and join them when the first invasion happens.
...for the record, the villains actually bullshit around, doing next to nothing. Spoiler alert!
Carter: Meanwhile, in the Power Rangers universe, which is said to be living in the shadow of the Super Sentai universe because we're weaker—hah, weaker? Those fuckers haven't met Conner and Jayden!
Matoi: Carter-sama, did you really have to say that?
Carter: I hung out with Rika during the first crossover review, in a sense. When I stayed there too long, I tend to pick up a few things, quirks of hers.
Matoi: ...sounds very frightening.
Carter: It's not that bad. Anyway, Aka Red, the embodiment of all Red Sentai Warriors, visits our world. Which, I should note, is in the year 2005. Yes, it hasn't budged a single year, apparentally.
Catherine: To be fair, I have visited worlds that haven't had much in the way of time and its progression.
Carter: Seriously? Huh. I guess it would kinda make sense...
...except for the fact that, like the Sentai universe, the Power Rangers Universe should at least either be 2011 or 2012. Following what Samurai has to do. But then again, considering that Akizuki thought that Samurai sucked ass...
Carter: ...aaaaaanyway, Tommy thinks about all his friends as he goes to sleep, including both of his ex-girlfriends—Katherine Hillard, there called "Catherine", not to be confused with my alternate counterpart, and the one the story focuses on the most, Kimberly Ann Hart.
But then! As he falls asleep, he has a vision. The five Sentai counterparts to him—Dragon Ranger, Kibaranger, Oh Red, Red Racer, and Abare Black—show up. And we get this.
- "They're me."said Tommy Oliver in surprise "They're all my costumes in the past."But as Tommy Oliver noticed his speech patterns, he was speaking in… Japanese.
That's right. For no reason whatsoever, Tommy Oliver, Mr. Swiss Cheese Memory himself, the man who keeps changing jobs for God knows what reason, is speaking Japanese.
...
Kore wa detaramedesu!*
Catherine: Whoa, hold on there, cowboy! You speak Japanese, too?
Mako: E e, masaka!*
Carter: Hai, Kyasarin to mako. Kami ga dono yōna riyū o shitte iru tame ni dōiu wake ka, watashi wa, sore o hanasu koto ga dekimasu.* **
Mako: No nihongo no nīzu ga hataraku.*
Carter: ...
Tonikaku, tomī wa, seikaku ni daremoga kokoro de onaji koto o gimon ni omou. Kore wa hijō ni wakariyasuidesu. Sentai no senshi wa, karera wa karedenai to iu koto de ikuga, kare wa kanari nagaiai kare no chikara de sorera to kyōyū shite iru.*
Catherine: Abare Black adds just how wholly different the Sentai Universe is to the Rangers' Universe, as if we already didn't know. My God, it feels like it repeats itself. And yes, I noticed the many other times that it did so.
Of course, Tommy is confused. Then the Sentai Warriors dehenshin, I guess, in front of him, revealing their true forms: the deceased Burai, the child Kou, Gorou Hoshino, Kyousuke Jinnai, and Asuka.
And yes, Asuka's a dude.
Carter: Burai wa, kare ga kako matawa shōrai no izureka de kare ni audarou to iu tomī ni nobeteimasu. Sore wa imiwonasanai, subete no ato, burai wa shōrai-teki ni ikite irudearu koto o okonatte inaidesu ka?*
...okay, you can stop it with the Japanese, Carter.
Carter: Watashi wa, Rika ni sore o tasukeru koto ga dekinai!*
(...then Carter literally turns Japanese: his brown hair turns dark, and he changes physically. Out of the surprise from Matoi and Mako, and out of half-amusement, half-"what the fuck?" from Catherine)
...ohhhh shit.
Well, anyway, Kou tells Tommy that he must give up his second power to someone. Who's the someone? Who the fuck knows?
Then enter Banba, also known as BIIIIG OOOOOONNNEEEEEEEEE!!!1. (Yes, that's exaggerated.) Why does he show up? He's the parallel to Tommy as far as being the mascot goes. Actually, now, Power Rangers' mascot is Bulk himself, being in more episodes than any other character.
Or he should be.
Then we get this from him.
- Banba: "Tommy Oliver as you know, your world and mine are somewhat correlated and your world started to activate its super powers in the year 1993 of this world. Ours was in 1975 and we had a temporary peace by 1978. This era of temporary peace has come now."
Yes. Fuck how the other teams before them had powers (Wild Wild Rangers, anyone? How's about the fuckton numerous origin stories?). The powers were first discovered in the year 1993.
Didn't do the research much?
Also, Banba knows the Ranger world for quite some time. After that, he leaves. And that rendered his time...(ding ding!)...completely fucking pointless.
Carter: Aka Red wa kare ga sentaku sareteiru koto o tomī ni tsugeru, arawaremasu. Shikashi nani no tame ni, anata ga motomeru koto ga dekiru?*
The answer: to obtain his powers. He believes that he's closer than ever, and if Tommy follows his five counterparts...well, who knows? And whoever'll be the new Aka Red, he'll be in a red light.
Spoiler alert: it ain't going to be Tommy.
After the dream, Tommy wakes up. Ending that segment.
Back at the Sentaiverse, Story!Mako and Takeru receive news from their mentor that their city's under attack. Who's attacking them? Who knows?
Oh, and they use the motorcycles in order to go into battle. Seriously.
Upon arriving, they see the Grinams, and they think that, yeah, they're from past evil forces. They henshin into Shinken Red and Shinken Pink, and they fight. However, the forces, which later include the Anaroids, beat them. Who can help them? Well, Takeru feels that the Dekarangers should show up—since, apparentally, they're also Alienizers or some shit.
And wouldn't you know it. Banban Akaza—Deka Red—and Marigold—Deka Gold—show up! Good God, this feels like the same anticlimax as was featured in the Mook vs. Ranger Operator Series Red fight in "Clash of the Red Rangers"!
Takeru wonders if the Sanzu River was overflowing. Banban doesn't reveal the answer, and after he and the others introduce themselves, Takeru decides to join the fight.
The rest of the chapter details the coming-together of several Sentai teams, so I'll make it short and sweet. First, Ryu tells them that they'll be on a space station after Mako requests for him to find the Shinkengers. Upon heading over there, which is described as a cross between the Animarium (run! A random singing princess appears!) and Terra Venture, they meet Doggie Kruger.
Kruger adds that yes, the Special Police Dekaranger had a hand in making the U.S.S.A, too! Then Ryu tells them about how their old enemy, Vyram, has resurfaced. Along with several other evils.
And yes, we're told that they have to form the alliance for that reason: to beat the new U.A.O.H. Akizuki, we're not fucking idiots. Stop repeating yourself, man!
Then Satoru and Sakura, Bouken Red and Bouken Pink, show up. They show the Shinkengers around the spacecraft. While the kids of the Jetmen play on, the parents teaching life lessons and all that. NEXT!
After that, Sosuke meets up with Takeru, and the latter hopes that Alata, Gosei Red, would show up soon. Then we get to flashbacks with the Jetmen facing Vyram's main Big Bad, Radiguet, who everyone knows is one sadistic mofo. Seriously, to put it this way: you know how Queen Bansheera doesn't give a shit about her allies? This guy did it before she did.
The chapters end with the various Jetmen talking about Radiguet and his army, how he'll gather the other villains, and other ca-razy hijinks including Ako hitting Gai with a frying pan because he's smoking. Dude, seriously? Yeah, Gai can be a...well, jerkass, but isn't that completely OOC for Ako?
Also, Gai thinks that living through his stab wound isn't a good idea after all. Okay, so there's another victim of Character Derailment-itis. Oh, and do you know how he survived? It happened thanks to "mysterious circumstances".
Matoi: So this person's rewriting history as he sees fit?
Damn straight. And that is always annoying as fuck. I mean...I liveblogged not one, not two, but three stories that featured author tracts and how a writer lives his life through his character(s), for fuck's sake!
Carter: Watashi wa kore o teishi suru ni wa yoi bashoda to omoimasu.*
Agreed. Well, two chapters down, a fuckton to go. Who will the U.S.S.A recruit next? Who's the mysterious successor to Aka Red? And what is Radiguet planning to do, exactly, anyway? And will Akazuki stop repeating what we already know?!
Emergency Signal, Now, Forward! To the next liveblogging of Super Sentai Vs. Power Rangers!!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I do apologize for the excessive use of Google Translate here.
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