When we last left off, Zoey was in the restroom, admiring her sexy but strange and exotic features. She decides to cover her Mark again and rushes out. Luckily, the parking lot is empty, except for some kid wearing those "seriously unattractive gang wanna-be baggy pants".
Zoey, the kid has a life and a personality. He was not created just so you could mock him. Oh, wait. Of course he was. Yes, I know no one on TV Tropes actually cares about House of Night. That still doesn't stop me from live blogging it.
The sun is a little too much for Zoey and she has to shield herself from its heat. Good to know she doesn't start sparkling, like certain other vampires.
Heath is there and Zoey proceeds to say (think?) "crap" a good three times.
I glanced up, looking at him from between my fingers like I was watching one of those stupid slasher movies. He was sitting on the open tailgate of his friend Dustin's pickup truck. Over his shoulder I could see into the cab of the truck where Dustin and his brother, Drew, were doing what they were usually doing- wrestling around and arguing over God only knows what stupid boy thing.* Thankfully, they were ignoring me. I glanced back at Heath and sighed. He had a beer in his hand and a goofy grin on his face. Momentarily forgetting that I'd just been Marked and was destined to become an outcast blood-sucking monster, I scowled at Heath.
Oh, and this part which makes me cringe with embarrassment:
"You're drinking at school! Are you crazy?
His little boy grin got bigger. "Yes I am crazy, 'bout you, baby!"
He... He did not just say that.
With that over with, Zoey begins to put her books and backpack into the passenger seat of her car. She asks Heath why they aren't at football practice, and Heath says that they "got the day off 'cause of the ass-kicking we gave Union on Friday". I'm not sure that's supposed to happen, but oh well.
Heath lets slip that he didn't cheat on her with Kayla and Zoey glares at him, exposing her Mark. Heath sees it and is all like, "The hell is that?" He then shows how big an idiot he really is.
"But you can't be Marked. We're going out."
Zoey's reaction?
"We are not going out!"
spoiler- She completely forgets about this and just about blows up when Kayla decides to pursue her relationship with her not-boyfriend.
Dustin then makes some comment about laying off those cigarettes, to which Heath says that she doesn't smoke, she's just a vampyre.
Great. Wonderful. Heath, with his usual total and complete lack of anything resembling good sense, thought he was actually standing up for me as he yelled at his friends, who instantly stuck their heads out of the open windows and gawked at me like I was a science experiment.
Drew calls Zoey a freak, pissing her off. She snaps at him, telling him to shut the hell up. She begins to feel all good because now she has power, though Heath snaps her out of her stupor.
Dustin starts up the truck, knocking Heath onto the blacktop. Zoey rushes to Heath's side and is about to pull him to his feet, but then she smells something hot and sweet and delicious. For some reason, she doesn't know what it is, but we all do.
There, Heath tells Zoey that he loves her and that they need to get back together. Respect her feelings, you idiot! The fact that she thinks you're a brainless drunkard really says a lot, you know!
Drew and Dustin come back and yanks Heath away, with Drew telling Zoey to leave Heath alone. After all, she is a freak.
Right. So Zoey gets into her Bug and has to try three times before she can get the engine started. She tells herself that she just has to get home and she wouldn't/couldn't think about what had just happened.
Zoey wonders why she wanted to be here so much, but decides it was just so she could get away from Heath and the parking lot. I honestly don't understand why Zoey needs to have a terrible family life. Maybe it's because she needs some reason to completely forget about them!
WMG
Zoey isn't human and was actually genetically engineered just to be the strongest vampyre. That's why her father left, because he couldn't stand knowing that his daughter would one day have to leave and take on a new life. That also explains why her stepfather seems to be so, well, cruel (at least to her) because he knows that in the end, she'll just leave and it won't matter how they raised her. Meanwhile, her mother was kind to her initially since she wanted her to know that humans weren't all bastards, but then changed when she realized that she'd sooner or later get brainwashed into believing it.It actually makes the series somewhat better, don't ya think?
The actual story
Zoey calls Dustin and Drew retards. I hope you know that that word is actually very offensive, young lady. Actually retarded people wouldn't take it too kindly. Oh, but then they could have been freaked out by her Mark. After all, people are scared of vampyres.Then she finally realizes it was the blood she was lusting after, not any cologne Heath might have had. Not Heath himself. Gee, sure must be hard being Heath, knowing your girlfriend really only cares about your blood. I— Oh, geez. Now we sporkers are putting more thought into the actual story than the Casts themselves most likely did.
No! No! No! Blood was not beautiful or desirable. I must be in shock. That's it. That had to be it. I was in shock and not thinking clearly. Okay... okay... absently, I touched my forehead. It had stopped burning, but it still felt different. I coughed for the zillionth time. Fine. I wouldn't think about Heath, but I couldn't deny it anymore. I felt different. My skin was ultrasensitive. My chest hurt, and even though I had my cool Maui Jim sunglasses on* , my eyes kept tearing up painfully.
Why must I always choose to spork the parts that you can't spork?
"I'm dying..." I moaned, and then promptly clamped my lips shut. I might actually be dying. I glanced up at the big brick house that, after three years, still didn't seem like home. "Get it over with. Just get it over with." At least my sister wouldn't be home yet- cheerleading practice. Hopefully, the troll would be hypnotized by his Ultra Force: Black Hawk Down video game (um... ew). I might have Mom to myself. Maybe she would understand... maybe she would know what to do...
Zoey decides to talk to her mom, who is siting on the couch, reading Chicken Soup for a Woman's Soul. Okay, then. Back before her stepfather came into the picture, her mom used to read exotic romances and wear makeup. Turns out he doesn't allow them. Wonder w- Oh, wait. Yeah, that's why.
She calls her mother Mama, like she used to. This catches her attention and she's worried for a second there, but then she sees Zoey's Mark. Zoey tries to convince her that this being Marked business has nothing to do with her herself. It just happened to her.
Her mom panics over what her father's going to think, obviously pissing Zoey off.
I wanted to scream how the hell would any of us know what my father was going to say, we haven't seen or heard from him for fourteen years! But I knew it wouldn't do any good, and it always made her mad when I reminded her that John was not my "real" father. So I tried a different tactic- one I'd given up on three years ago.
Yes, Casts, we all know it's been three years. Now please stop reminding us.
Zoey begs for her mom not to tell John, but she says that you can't even cover it up with makeup. Then it turns out that there's a special kind of makeup that serves just this purpose!
The two get in an argument which is really too ridiculous to spork. Well, the real reason is that it's late and I want to finish this soon, but still.
Oh, and this part:
"No, Mother. The truth is that because of him you haven't paid any attention to your kids for three years* . Did you know that your oldest daughter has turned into a sneaky, spoiled slut who's screwed half the football team? Do you know what nasty, bloody video games Kevin keeps hidden from you? No, of course you don't! The two of them act happy and pretend to like John and the whole damn make-believe family thing, so you smile at them and pray for them and let them do whatever. And me? You think I'm the bad one because I don't pretend- because I'm honest. You know what? I'm so sick of my life I'm glad the Tracker Marked me! They call that vampyre school the House of Night, but it can't be any darker than this perfect home!" Before I could cry or scream I whirled around and stalked back to my bedroom, slamming the door behind me.
-I hope they all drown.
What a kind and sympathetic protagonist. Also I'm listening to Haddaway so I'm not nearly as annoyed as I should be right now.
And that whole "couldn't be any darker" thing? What if the House of Night is just them raping and cutting you open and brainwashing you into believing that being a vampyre is just the best?
Besides, it can't be that bad. We don't know how much time John really spends at home.
Geez, sporkers have it hard...
Her mom calls John and tells him about the whole thing.
Zoey empties all the stuff out of her backpack so she won't have to cry, like she's tempted to. She thinks about what she's going to bring with her. She settles on a couple of black T-shirts, an aqua cami, some stuffed bras, thongs, and hair and makeup things. Oh, and her stuffed fish, Otis.
John knocks on the door, and so Zoey has to go to the living room to talk to them.
Hmm, I wonder how this is going to go.
Review
We're only two chapters in and already this is getting hard to bear. I should tell you, the characters all have personalities: in other words, Zoey says they're like that, so they're like that. You know, it's not like they always fail to live up to how Zoey describes them.I'm already on the third chapter, we can't give up now!
