Follow TV Tropes

Live Blogs Alice in Shivering Isles
Ramus2011-08-18 12:17:42

Go To


Welcome to the Fringe

So, welcome to the Fringe. This is the edge of madness and already boring Alice, let's move on shall we? Has some nice (but boring) scenery though.

*snort*

And then some water hobo attacked Alice for stealing his stash of shrooms. Sure showed him who's Aquaman's favorite. And while we're here, might as well keep reusing more jokes.

Oh, and we can even snort black tar, sweet!

There's not enough time in the world to snort it all!

Yeah, all of these ruins? Kind of pointless.

Welcome to the lovely town of Passwall. Oh! Lookie at the two guys talking. Let's see what they're up to.

"Hi, I'm Alice. What's your name?" "So who's this gatekeeper I keep hearing about?" "Any way for me to get in?" "Waaah, that's mean. But what about the town?"

And then they run off. Alice's a curious girl, so she follows along.

*cough* "So about that gatekeeper." *cough*

OHMIGOSH! He's ADORABLE!

You know, the guard said the same thing that second I left my cell.

ASS SHOT +50

It appears as though he didn't like that. Oh balls.

Well, after several more attempts to pet the gatekeeper gently with arrows and a bow, she decides to settle on looting the nearby corpses and selling the gear for monies. Bleh, it's ugly looking. Sticking to the emperor's robes.

*snort*

"Hello, blue lady!" "Can I live here?" "Well, you're a stupid dummy head too. I want to marry the gatekeeper!" "..." "Look, stupid dummy head, can I or can I not marry him?" "Yayz! So how do weddings work around here?" "Sounds kinky. When can we get started?" ":P" "I have some hobo's head on a stick here, go ahead!"

Well, she didn't take seeing the hobo's head on a stick well, so Alice is on her own for setting up the marriage. But first, burning the evidence.

Deciding to try her luck again, Alice went ahead and visiting Stupid Dummy Head again and see if she'd be better about the whole arrangement now. Lesson number one about how to greet someone properly: Stick a sword up their butt.

Oh no! Mister Doodles! We're going to have to sew you up again! Anyway, her blank stare screams "I still hate you", so maybe some other time.

Alice spends some time asking the other towns folks about various ways to propose marriage. Apparently one way is to kill the person you're proposing to around these parts. What an odd custom and oh noes! Alice already has competition. So she decides to get some practice in. It doesn't go so well. Well, you know the procedure by now.

Now, using this wooden spoon, Alice shall psychically read the dreams of this lady.

Instead, she just gets teleported to another bed. How odd. Might as well do this the old fashion way. Yay for old school videogame unhelpful hints!

*snort*

And now to make a man gay.

"Hi, I'm Alice!" "Oh, you're right, they do look better without skin. I can't believe I never noticed that!" "You want to marry the gatekeeper too, right?" "But I want to bone him!" "That's an odd way to propose, don't you think?"

And that's when Alice finds out Jayred was cheating on his other husband! Injustice! It's time to bring down the cold steel on this guy! But how? She must make this illegal and immoral action widely known so no one thinks she was the perpetrator!

Clearly there's only one person to talk to.

Well, so much for that.

There's only one option left: To become the night and seek relentless justice! She must become the Batlizard!

(By the end of this, writing this stuff is going to make me brain dead stupid.)

No Comments (Yet)

Top