The point of this live blog is a personal writing challenge - write a ~250 word blurb about (preferably a character introduction or pilot voice-over) the characters generated by the They Fight Crime generator (found on the appropriate trope page). Originality, and hilarity, are mandatory. Guest writers welcome! (Use the comments section, I guess...)
Round 1: "He's an otherworldly native American jungle king on the run. She's a hard-bitten antique-collecting stripper with someone else's memories. They fight crime!"
Whoooah boy, that's a doozey. Here we go!