Live Blogs You're only reading this because I rated the game 3/10! Let's read horrible GameFAQs reviews!

Ephraim2252011-04-19 00:10:18

Game FA Qs is perhaps one of the most informative Video Game websites known to man. Created in 1995, the site is a database of video game information, nearly all of which is submitted by volunteer contributors. You can find just about anything you'd want to know about any given game: walkthroughs, maps, cheats, secrets, release dates, box art, reviews...

Haha reviews

Game FA Qs is already notorious for its many Fora, the userbase of which is known to consist primarily of Trolls, idiots, console soldiers, and people too lazy to read the FAQs the damn site is named for. But that wouldn't be enough, for there is a second cesspit of hatred and lies on this otherwise awesome website - the reviews section, where users are allowed to give their opinions on a given game or system.

Maybe you've come across that one review on that one game, and something seems a little off. That is, you can't understand where the reviewer is coming from, or his spelling sucks, or maybe he didn't even play the damn game. I, Ephraim225, am here to expose the worst, most incomprehensible, unreadable, and possibly painful Game FA Qs reviews you have ever had the misfortune of hearing about.

Now, don't get me wrong, we all have opinions. Mine might be different, that's just life etc. etc....but hear me out. I've seen Game FA Qs users write good reviews before. I've seen reviews that I don't agree with but are well-written. We're here to find the reviews that will make you let out a Flat "What", among other unexpected expected reactions.

Let's read horrible Game FA Qs reviews.

Comments

Envyus Since: Dec, 1969

Apr 21st 2011 at 9:06:46 AM

good god this dude was an idiot

slowzombie Since: Dec, 1969

Apr 21st 2011 at 9:29:35 AM

It's this kind of thinking that really turned me away from any sort of RPG for a while. Sure, genre conventions and tropes is one thing, but when any attempt at originality and flair, as the Mario RPGs tend to do is deemed too much of a deviation, well, then your genre probably has a problem. This liveblog is looking to become interesting, partially because I find blatant Fan Dumb hilarious.

AwesomeZombie22 Since: Dec, 1969

Apr 21st 2011 at 2:34:38 PM

I like the Paper Mario series and I can still enjoy Final Fantasy 6, partially because my tastes are varied and partially because the reason why the Mario RP Gs are so good in my opinion is that they add variety and flair, and can even get people who don't like RP Gs to play them.

This guy (the reviewer, not the liveblogger) is one of those gamers who doesn't like variety. I really don't understand people who will say a game sucks because it does something different (unless said difference is completely unrecognizable as the genre / series, which Paper Mario doesn't do, it's recognizable as a Mario RPG, unless you're blind).

As for your liveblog, it's great. I really don't get how this guy can't hit a tree with the hammer, either. Especially since most trees are in corners. I could hit flying enemies with the hammer when I was eight (it takes timing). The only area in the game I remember getting lost in was the maze to get to the castle, but that's because I forgot things easily as a kid, but at least I was able to navigate the battle menu as a wee one. For a guy who only plays TRUE RPGS he's surprisingly bad with menu systems.

gentlemanorcus Since: Dec, 1969

Apr 21st 2011 at 4:12:44 PM

I liked this one, mostly because I hate people who say that anything that deviates from the normal formula is NOT A TRUE GAME. The other stupidity was just icing on the cake.