Line #26 WebVideo/BrandonsCultMovieReviews


1	[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/screenshot_2021_11_02_205528.png]]
2	[[caption-width-right:350:]]
3	-> "Alright, it's time for [[Film/{{Gamera}} the giant flying turtle]] to [[Film/GameraVsBarugon face off against the rainbow death lizard]] to find out once and for all [[SoBadItsGood who's more ridiculous!]]"
4
5	''Brandon's Cult Movie Reviews'', hosted by Brandon Tenold, is a WebVideo review series focusing on cult cinema, including low-budget sci-fi, dinosaurs, foreign knock-offs and the films of Caroline Munro. Many of the episodes were originally produced in 2011-2014 but were pulled down from Website/{{YouTube}} due to copyright issues. The show returned with new episodes soon after and was picked up by Website/ChannelAwesome, before leaving that platform in a mass exodus in 2018.
6
7	----
8	!!Oh no! Tropes! My one weakness!
9
10	* AbortedArc: In October 2014, Brandon planned to feature all three ''Series/TalesFromTheCrypt'' movies. However, after a DMCA takedown of his review of ''Film/BordelloOfBlood'', he chose not to post a review of the third film, ''The Ritual''. He later would say it's the worst of the three films. {{Subverted\|Trope}} when, in 2017, he finally reviewed the film.
11	* AccentuateTheNegative: Usually averted; his show is less about denouncing bad movies and more about making people discover cheesy old movies, and while he ''will'' sometimes get mad at movies which he thinks are genuinely terrible, most of the time he will just crack jokes and enjoy them, if just for the SoBadItsGood vibe.
12	* ActuallyPrettyFunny: Brandon admits to being amused by ''some'' of the jokes in the generally sub-par ''Student Bodies''.
13	* AskAStupidQuestion: Often gives sarcastic replies to a character's dumb question. To provide an example, in his review of ''Film/BattleBeyondTheStars'':
14	-->'''Cayman:''' [after being compared to [[BigBad Sador]], a BerserkButton because Sador killed his whole race] Sador? Sador of the Malmori?\
15	'''Brandon:''' No, [[OneSteveLimit Sador Smith]]. You probably got them confused. Who the hell do ''you'' think she was talking about?
16	* AuthorAppeal:
17	** Dinosaurs. He even watched ''Epic: Days of the Dinosaur'' because of this [[spoiler:even though it only has one dinosaur in it for a couple of minutes]]. And Caroline Munro, of course.
18	** He's made Top 10 lists of the best Creator/RayHarryhausen movies and the top ''Franchise/{{Godzilla}}'' movies, although he's also reviewed some of the stinkers from the latter. He also made a few jokes at the expense of the producers of ''Film/TheGiantClaw'' deciding not to hire Harryhausen to create the film's monster (instead using an effects company in Mexico to save money, and resulting in one of the most goofy BMovie monsters ''ever'' as a result), even flat out asking "WhatWereYouThinking"
19	** Brandon did a whole month on the LostWorld movies of Doug [=McClure=] and was excited enough that Doug appeared in ''Film/Firebird2015AD'' during his "Canuxploitation-a-thon" that he brought back the opening to [=McClure=]'s month (well, a few seconds of it).
20	** Classic rock. His previous video series was music-centered, and he's worked in [[ShoutOut references]] to Music/DeepPurple, Music/{{Hawkwind}}, and [[Music/GeorgeClinton Parliament-Funkadelic]] in his movie reviews. He also took a short break from reviews in late 2015 to go on tour with his band, where he plays bass guitar.
21	** In early 2016, Brandon has done a "Film/{{Gamera}}-a-thon," a series reviewing the Showa ''Gamera'' films. Although he clamied that he wasn't really a Gamera fan and was mostly doing the marathon due to fan demand.
22	* BaitAndSwitch: After explaining the origins of ''Film/CreepShow'', he finishes off with this comment:
23	-->"So we've got [[Creator/GeorgeRomero two]] [[Creator/StephenKing titans]] of the horror genre finally working together for the first time. [[WhatCouldPossiblyGoWrong What could go wrong?]] (beat) [[SincerityMode Nothing! Sometimes I do movies I like on this channel]]."
24	* BerserkButton:
25	** Not really berserk, as in screaming, raving mad, but Brandon is especially annoyed with the TagalongKid in the ''Gamera'' films, referring to them generically as "Kenny", or in the rare case of a young girl, "Kendra."
26	** In his review of 1969 Mexican film ''Film/NightOfTheBloodyApes,'' Brandon gets ticked off when the English-language voice dubs pronounce the name "Julio" as "Jew-lio" instead of "Who-lio."
27	* BrickJoke: His review of Film/TheWarOfTheWorlds1953 ended with him snarkily suggesting that he'd probably follow up his review of a legitimately good sci-fi classic with a movie about "TV Zombies or something". His very next review was of Film/TheVideoDead.
28	* TheCameo: So far, WebVideo/TheCinemaSnob showed up in the ''Alienator'' review, and [[WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall Linkara]] loaned Brandon an "[[CatchPhrase I AM A MAN!!!]]" for ''America 3000.'' Brandon has also cameoed in Linkara's 500th Episode 3-parter. Much later, WebVideo/MonsterIslandBuddies wrote a comedic recap for Part 2 of his ''Film/KingKongVsGodzilla'' review.
29	* CelebrityResemblance: A couple of times he has made jokes about his similarity to Creator/MichaelCHall, or as a fan said it, a "Canadian ''Series/{{Dexter}}''".
30	* CharacterCatchphrase:
31	** An older one was usually uttered in reference to the antagonists' plots, "Of course! The fiends!"
32	** "[[{{Zeerust}} In the far-off future of]]... ''(insert past year here)''!"
33	** ''(observing that characters in a situation [[GenreSavvy tend to die]])'' "Ah, I'm sure they'll be fine."
34	* CoversAlwaysLie: Played with in his ''Film/TheDragonLivesAgain'' review. The DVD case promises it's the strangest martial arts movie ever. Brad gives it a watch to verify the claim, and he finds it pretty accurate.
35	* CriticalBacklash: [[invoked]]He thinks ''Film/Lifeforce1985'' is much better than critics give it credit for.
36	* {{Crossover}}: His only crossover so far, a review of ''WesternAnimation/TheHauntedWorldOfElSuperBeasto'' with The Stupid Team.
37	* DeadpanSnarker: Possibly one of the snarkiest reviewers out there. The movies he reviews often are cheesy in their tone and special effects, and he ''loves'' making fun of them.
38	* DerangedAnimation: So far he's reviewed ''WesternAnimation/{{Felidae}}'', ''Anime/WickedCity'', ''Once Upon a Girl.'', ''WesternAnimation/{{Wizards}}'' and ''Fight! Anime/{{Iczer}} One!''.
39	* DullSurprise: A sailor at the beginning of ''Film/{{Ape}}'' is either stoned out of his mind or really badly dubbed (or both). His dull "Oh shit" made Brandon crack up.
40	* EarlyInstallmentWeirdness: Brandon's riffing was much dryer and more deadpan in the early reviews, later episodes have much more energy and vitriol, more in league with the house style of Channel Awesome. One of Brandon's favorite [[TheStoner hobbies]] may have contributed to the more laid back tone of the first videos.
41	* EveryoneHasStandards: He hates Kennys, but still balks at the thought of them being molested.
42	-->"Never thought I'd say this, but RUN, KENNY!"
43	* FailureHero: From ''[[Literature/TheCorneliusChronicles The Final Programme]]'':
44	-->'''Jerry Cornelius:''' Miss Brunner! I'm losing!
45	-->'''Brandon:''' [[TakeThatScrappy Heh, you suck, Jerry Cornelius!]]
46	* FollowTheLeader:[[invoked]]
47	** This trend created many of the films Brandon has reviewed, including three separate ''Film/KingKong'' rip-offs and the ''Starcrash'' movies. He also made a month-long series of movies (most of them Italian) that ripped off ''Film/{{Alien}}''.
48	** Of particular note is ''Film/TheDark1979'', a film originally about a murderous zombie that was rewritten as a space alien to try and ride the coat tails of ''Franchise/StarWars''. The change was accomplished pretty much solely by badly adding in laser effects during murder scenes.
49	** While he makes plenty of humor about ''Film/{{Gorgo}}'' being similar to ''Franchise/{{Godzilla}}'' (even making a BaitAndSwitch gag when he acts like he's going to review a ''Godzilla'' movie, as he's been asked so often), he also points out that ''Gorgo'' had a few interesting twists (like the fact MonsterIsAMommy -- he even says he likes the little Gorgo more than Minilla).
50	* GratuitousItalian: In his review of ''Film/{{Demons}}'', Brandon tosses a "C'è terminata, stronzo! ([[Film/TheTerminator You're terminated, fucker!]]" when the heroes kill the final demon in the theater, who looks like a Terminator because of its metal mask.
51	** He makes a callback to this in his review of the sequel, when a demon emerges from a TV, distorting the screen: "Lucio Fulci presenta... Film/{{Videodrome}}."
52	* SugarWiki/GushingAboutShowsYouLike: InUniverse he found a way to gush about ''Film/DemonKnight'' in a sarcastic, backhanded manner. Basically he "complained" that because the movie had a strong cast, good writing, and a compelling plot, it was making his job as a snarky critic very hard to do.
53	* HypocriticalHumor: When Brandon reviewed ''Film/GodzillaFinalWars'' he noted the presence of Don Frye, MMA fighter and pro wrestler who the director was a fan of. He briefly made fun of the idea of bringing in a pro wrestler to garner attention, right before his video had a cameo from Simon Gotch (pro wrestler and half of the former Wrestling/{{WWE}} tag team the Vaudevillains).
54	-->'''Brandon:''' ''(smirking after the cameo ends)'' I know a wrestler.
55	* KidAppealCharacter: Brandon dislikes most small child characters in films, noting his disdain for the kids in ''Film/{{Gunhed}}'', and claiming that it's part of the reason that he prefers ''Franchise/{{Godzilla}}'' over ''Film/{{Gamera}}''. In his review of ''Film/SonOfGodzilla'', he notes that while Minya was created to appeal to kids, even when he was young he watched ''Godzilla'' films for Godzilla, rather than his son. It's since become a BerserkButton (or more like "snark button") and he made a label for all of them:
56	* LighterAndSofter: Aside from the aforementioned example of ''Demon Knight'' and his uber-popular ''Godzilla'' reviews, Brandon has gradually started reviewing more films that he actually likes, such as ''Film/BlackChristmas1974'' and the first ''Film/{{Phantasm}}'' film.
57	* LoonyFan: His review of ''Film/GodzillaVsKingGhidorah'' is "forced" into production by one of these, who messages Brandon that he's outside his house and will [[FreudianThreat castrate him with a pair of pliers]] unless he makes a new ''Godzilla'' film review... [[NotHyperbole and when Brandon looks out the window, there he is, pliers and all]].
58	** He makes a reappearance for the ''Film/GodzillaFinalWars'' video, this time with a [[AxCrazy rather large axe.]]
59	** He's finally taken down in the ''Film/GodzillaAndMothraTheBattleForEarth'' video -- not by Brandon, but by the Canadian winter. The last we see of him is him lying facedown in the snow, [[TalkingWithSigns holding a note]] reading "[[GrimUpNorth FUCK ME, IT'S COLD]]!"
60	** And then he comes back for very end of the the ''Film/Godzilla2000'' video, ducking down behind the window as Brandon notices him.
61	* MemeticBadass: InUniverse. As [[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Spoony]] did for Reb Brown and as the [[WebVideo/TheCinemaSnob Snob]] did for Pierre Kirby, Brandon does for Doug [=McClure=], highlighting a scene in ''Film/ThePeopleThatTimeForgot'' where [=McClure=] takes an ''arrow to the face'' and just shrugs it off.
62	* MindScrew: A lack of budget and creative oddities have left Brandon scratching his head in confusion many times.
63	** The crab monster... thing in ''The Lost Continent'', along with many of that movie's twists.
64	** ''Film/OnceUponAGirl'' rallies back and forth between MindScrew and {{Squick}}.
65	** ''Film/RockNRollNightmare'' is probably the most baffling of the films he's reviewed due to crappy monster designs, a last-minute AssPull AND NoEnding to top it all off.
66	** True to the text, Brandon finds TheFilmOfTheBook of ''[[Literature/TheCorneliusChronicles The Final Programme]]'' to be a non-stop MindScrew from beginning to end.
67	* TheMockbuster: Several reviewed films are this, including ''Turkish Spider-Man'', ''Starcrash'', and ''Film/{{Ape}}''
68	* MyCountryTisOfTheeThatISting: He's done several jokes regarding being Canadian, including reviewing several bad movies made in the country (the "Canuxploitation" specials), using the name of the national anthem as a ReviewIronicEcho in them, and multiple jokes about how Saskachetwan [[GrimUpNorth gets very cold in the winter]], and not much warmer in the summer (e.g. ''Film/BlackChristmas1974'' showing a toasty Canadian July).
69	* {{Narm}}: InUniverse he laughed at the second kill in ''Film/TheDark1979'', due to the shoddy effects added in.
70	* ObligatoryJoke: Brandon stops himself from making a "dingoes took my baby" joke while watching ''WesternAnimation/Epic1984''
71	* OhCrap: Brandon's reaction to learning that the Patreon goal for the ''Film/{{Gamera}}''-a-thon has been reached is to yell, "Oh, shit!"
72	** He's also created a minor running gag out of a clip of a character from ''Film/{{Ape}}'' giving a very [[DullSurprise bored line-read]] of "Oh shit."
73	* OlderThanHeLooks: [[https://twitter.com/BrandonTenold/status/920786206870331392 Would you believe he's 32]] in 2017?
74	* OscarBait: Even labeled as such on-screen with [=McClure=]'s character's dying speech in ''Film/ThePeopleThatTimeForgot''.
75	* OverusedRunningGag: Not so much lampshaded that he uses it a lot so much as lampshading why he didn't used it: In his review of ''Film/MiamiConnection'' he points out that he didn't used the "no-one will be seated during the ''[[SarcasmMode thrilling]]'' [boring segment where nothing interesting happens]" RunningGag because there are ''so many'' segments where nothing happens that he would have run it into the ground.
76	* PoliticallyIncorrectHero: Joked about in his review of ''Film/MiamiConnection'', after the hero band sings a song called "Against The Ninja". Brandon lampshades the bad guys are a ninja dojo and says that maybe the reason they are out to kill the heroes is because they are offended by the song.
77	* ProductPlacement: Brandon spoofs ''Rock and Roll Nightmare'' and its constant Coke product placement (at one point, Jon Mikl Thor conspicuously turns a can around so that the label on a can of Coke is facing towards the camera).
78	* RealLifeRelative:[[invoked]] For the ''Film/CryingFreeman'' review, Brandon mentions that stars Mark Dacascos and Julie Condra are married in real life.
79	* ReferenceOverdosed: Like any internet critic worth their salt, Brandon throws references into his comments whenever he can.
80	* ReviewIronicEcho: During each of his "Canucks-ploitation-a-thons", he's done an annoyed "Oh, Canada!" to close out one of the reviews.
81	** Also done heavily in his "Get Mean" review, whenever the characters lampshade how insane the situation is.
82	* RunningGag: Several.
83	** "Maybe we'll get to see some nudity?" [NOPE].
84	** Any movie with a bunch of alternate titles will have ''Film/ABayOfBlood'' be the last listed.
85	** Dubbing in [[Series/ChappellesShow "Psych!"]] whenever a movie does an AssPull. After his review of ''Film/{{Ape}}'', this has alternated with a clip of a sailor saying a very bored "Oh shit".
86	** An episode-specific one: Frequently shouting "Holy shit! I think Marty's the killer!" in the review of ''Film/SlaughterHigh'' after the "twist" is telegraphed in the first couple of minutes.
87	** Whenever Caroline Munro appears, she's accompanied by the song "Warrior of Love"... which is actually sung by her.
88	** "No one will be seated during the thrilling..."
89	** "Of course! The fiends!"
90	** "[[VideoGame/BrutalLegend DECAPITATIOOOOOON!]]" whenever someone is decapitated.
91	** In ''Film/DemonKnight'' he used the line "Put a cork in it, [[Creator/BillyZane Zane]]!" from ''Film/{{Zoolander}}''.
92	** "TitleDrop!"
93	** Playing a clip of Pharoahe Monch's "Simon Says (Get the Fuck Up)" whenever Godzilla is awakened from sleeping/being knocked unconscious to wake him up.
94	** (Something odd or mundane kills someone on-screen) "(Something odd or mundane)! His/Her/Its ''one'' weakness!" Occasionally varied by pretending it's the dying character saying this.
95	** Playing the battle music of ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'' episode ''Amok Time'' (also known as [[WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}} the Decapodian National Anthem]]) OnceAnEpisode during a fight sequence in his "Creator/DougMcClure-a-Thon".
96	** Snarking constantly about the description of the bird as "a giant battleship" in his review of ''Film/TheGiantClaw''.
97	** Playing a snippet of "Drinkin' Boys" by DJ Ozma (AKA the one with a bunch of naked singers covering themselves with paper fans) when he wants to refer to Japanese media being ''weird''.
98	** Fans constantly asking him when the next review of a ''Godzilla'' movie will come out, as well as ''Godzilla's Revenge'' being a personal TraumaButton.
99	* RunningGagged:
100	** After playing the battle music from the ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'' episode ''Amok Time'' OnceAnEpisode during his "Creator/DougMcClure-a-Thon" (with varying degrees of earnestness) he played only five seconds of the music in the final review ("Warriors of Atlantis") before stopping it and saying he was bored of it.
101	** The above-mentioned running gag with "Drinkin' Boys" comes to an end in the review of ''Film/LegendOfDinosaursAndMonsterBirds'' with him stopping the video snippet and saying he's tired of it.
102	** In his review of ''Film/HorrorExpress'', he exploits the fact that one of the characters is played by Creator/TellySavalas to drop three "[[Series/{{Kojak}} who [x]'s you, baby?]]" jokes and say (after Savalas' character is appropriately killed off) that "ok, I swear I'll stop with the 'Kojak' jokes."
103	* TheScrappy: InUniverse, he considers any obnoxious kid, that gets far more screen time than reasonable, to be this for a movie, particularly any "Kenny" character in a ''Gamera'' film.
104	* ShallowParody:[[invoked]] Brandon's chief problem with ''[[GenderFlip Queen Kong,]]'' even comparing the level of humor to Creator/SeltzerAndFriedberg.
105	* SharedUniverse: Because of his cameos and his inclusion onto Channel Awesome, he's part of the Reviewaverse.
106	* ShoutOut
107	** Numerous to ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000''; there used to be a reference to or clip from the show in pretty much every review.
108	** ''Series/DoctorWho'' also comes up in a lot of jokes. It's even been lampshaded a few times, such as during the review of ''Film/TheGiantClaw''.
109	** To mock the really shoddy 3-D in ''Film/{{Ape}}'', Brandon cuts to [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLVZAoQB2fI Doctor Tongue's Evil House of Pancakes]] from ''Series/{{SCTV}}''.
110	** Another from the ''Film/{{Ape}}'' review: he can't think of a joke about the lead actress being the mom from ''Series/GrowingPains'', so he cuts to a clip from ''WesternAnimation/TheVentureBros'' that makes the joke for him.
111	** Played the [[Wrestling/HulkHogan "Real American"]] theme as the intro to the Doug [=McClure=] tributes, at least before the copywriters chimed in.
112	** He gave one to Website/ThisVeryWiki in his ''Film/GodzillaVsKingGhidorah'' review where he shows the JapanTakesOverTheWorld page after the film mentions Japan becomes the world's greatest super power in the future.
113	* SigningOffCatchPhrase: "Well that's all for now, until next time."
114	* SoBadItsGood:[[invoked]] Brandon's genre of choice, although he ranks some above others.
115	* SoundtrackDissonance: Several of his reviews feature him noting the ill-fitting music, notably ''Film/LegendOfDinosaursAndMonsterBirds'' and ''Film/SonOfGodzilla''.
116	* SpaceWhaleAesop: Invoked at the end of his Film/GodzillaVsHedorah review:
117	-->"The important lesson to take away from this movie is to respect the environment, because if you don't a giant sludge monster will force you to star in the world's biggest [[{{Hentai}} Bukake]] video"
118	* TheTeamNormal: According to [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wEXKDt6fWRk this]], he is pretty much the most normal reviewer on Channel Awesome.
119	* ThisIsGonnaSuck: The review of Film/CreepShow3 begins with him groaning into his hands before angrily saying "screw it! Get to the title card!" He repeats a similar action after seeing the animated opening sequence.
120	* TitleDrop: [[ShoutOut Referenced by name]] when it happens in ''Film/TheLandThatTimeForgot'' and ''The Final Programme.''
121	* TopTenList: He did a list of the 10 worst films he reviewed, and then updated it a few years later. The second list was paired with the 10 best films he reviewed.
122	* WatchItStoned: [[invoked]] He's made a few jokes about using drugs to watch a movie (or go through its review) [[INeedAFreakingDrink if he considers it just that bad.]]

Context WebVideo / BrandonsCultMovieReviews