Line #104 Literature/BaileySchoolKids


1	''The Adventures of the Bailey School Kids'' (or simply ''The Bailey School Kids'') is a series of children's chapter books co-authored by Marcia T. Jones and Debbie Dadey. It revolves around a group of third-grade kids who are convinced that people around them are monsters. In each story, the kids meet an adult who shows signs of being some mythical being.
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3	In 2021, Scholastic Graphix began publishing graphic novel adaptations of the series.
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5	-----
6	[[foldercontrol]]
7
8	[[folder:Contains the following titles:]]
9	#''[[SternTeacher Vampires]] Don't Wear Polka Dots''
10	#''[[DrillSergeantNasty Werewolves]] Don't Go to [[SummerCampy Summer Camp]]''
11	#''[[AlmightyJanitor Santa Claus]] Doesn't [[LimitedAdvancementOpportunities Mop Floors]]''
12	#''[[LittlePeopleAreSurreal Leprechauns]] Don't [[{{Irony}} Play Basketball]]''
13	#''[[Literature/GhostsDontEatPotatoChips Ghosts Don't Eat Potato Chips]]''
14	#''[[GentleGiant Frankenstein]] Doesn't [[RealMenWearPink Plant Petunias]]''
15	#''[[FunnyForeigner Aliens]] Don't [[BracesOfOrthodonticOverkill Wear Braces]]''
16	#''[[Literature/GeniesDontRideBicycles Genies Don't Ride Bicycles]]''
17	#''Pirates Don't [[RealMenWearPink Wear Pink Sunglasses]]''
18	#''Witches Don't Do Back Flips''
19	#''[[NoodlePeople Skeletons]] Don't Play Tubas''
20	#''[[GenderFlip Cupid]] Doesn't [[PunBasedTitle Flip Hamburgers]]''
21	#''[[GripingAboutGremlins Gremlins]] Don't Chew Bubble Gum''
22	#''Monsters Don't Scuba Dive''
23	#''Zombies Don't Play Soccer''
24	#''Dracula Doesn't [[WhenLifeGivesYouLemons Drink Lemonade]]''
25	#''Elves Don't Wear Hard Hats''
26	#''Martians Don't Take Temperatures''
27	#''[[OurGargoylesRock Gargoyles]] Don't [[TheDriver Drive School Buses]]''
28	#''Wizards Don't [[MagicVersusScience Need Computers]]''
29	#''Mummies Don't Coach Softball''
30	#''Cyclops Doesn't Roller-Skate''
31	#''Angels Don't [[KungFuJesus Know Karate]]''
32	#''Dragons Don't Cook Pizza''
33	#''Bigfoot Doesn't Square Dance''
34	#''Mermaids Don't Run Track''
35	#''[[DumbMuscle Bogeymen]] Don't [[UsefulNotes/AmericanFootball Play Football]]''
36	#''Unicorns Don't Give Sleigh Rides''
37	#''Knights Don't Teach Piano''
38	#''[[MrFanservice Hercules]] Doesn't [[DepravedDentist Pull Teeth]]''
39	#''[[Literature/GhoulsDontScoopIceCream Ghouls Don't Scoop Ice Cream]]''
40	#''[[BadassLongcoat Phantoms]] Don't [[CoolCar Drive Sports Cars]]''
41	#''Giants Don't Go Snowboarding''
42	#''Franchise/{{Frankenstein}} Doesn't Slam Hockey Pucks''
43	#''[[AllTrollsAreDifferent Trolls]] Don't Ride Roller Coasters''
44	#''Wolfmen Don't Hula Dance''
45	#''Goblins Don't [[PacManFever Play Video Games]]''
46	#''Ninjas Don't Bake Pumpkin Pie''
47	#''{{Dracula}} Doesn't RockAndRoll''
48	#''Sea Monsters Don't [[CoolBike Ride Motorcycles]]''
49	#''The Bride of Frankenstein Doesn't Bake Cookies''
50	#''Robots Don't Catch Chicken Pox''
51	#''Vikings Don't [[ProfessionalWrestling Wear Wrestling Belts]]''
52	#''Ghosts Don't Ride Wild Horses''
53	#''Wizards Don't Wear Graduation Gowns''
54	#''Sea Serpents Don't Juggle Water Balloons''
55	#''[[FrankensteinsMonster Frankenstein]] Doesn't Start Food Fights''
56	#''[[RuleOfThree Dracula]] Doesn't Play Kickball''
57	#''Werewolves Don't [[PresidentEvil Run For President]]''
58	#''The Abominable Snowman Doesn't Roast Marshmallows''
59	#''Dragons Don't Throw Snowballs''
60	[[/folder]]
61	----
62	!!The franchise provides examples of:
63
64	* AcademyOfAdventure: Even compared to [[CityOfAdventure Bailey City]] as a whole, Bailey Elementary School has some colorful characters. There's a third-grade teacher who may or may not be a vampire, a guidance counselor who may or may not be Dracula himself, a basketball coach who may or may not be a leprechaun, a school nurse who may or may not be a Martian, a bus driver who may or may not be a gargoyle, a janitor who may or may not be ''Santa Claus''... You get the idea.
65	* AesopAmnesia: The characters take turns between believing a character is supernatural, considering it unlikely, and teasing their friends for considering it, depending on the book. This becomes particularly [[JustForFun/{{Egregious}} egregious]] when a character who was convinced their science teacher was a sea monster in the last book sneers at their friend for thinking the cashier at a restaurant is a mummy in the next.
66	* AgentMulder: Liza is almost always the one to suggest that someone is a supernatural creature.
67	* AgentScully: Eddie is consistently the most doubtful of the group, making him official Scully. Melody also usually takes more convincing than the others.
68	* AlbinosAreFreaks: In ''Aliens Don't Wear Braces'', the kids believe Mrs. Zork is an alien from a planet without color, as when they first meet her, her skin and hair are pure white and her clothes are monochrome. Throughout the book, the town gradually appears to lose its color, while Mrs. Zork gets more and more colorful, leading the kids to believe that she's stealing the town's color and bringing it back to her home planet.
69	* AlienInvasion: What the kids believe Ms. Zork's plan is. [[spoiler: Turns out she's stealing the world's color to take to her planet.]]
70	* AliensSpeakingEnglish: Ms. Zork speaks perfect, albeit broken, English.
71	* AlmightyJanitor: Regardless of whether or not he's Santa, Mr. Jolly is this.
72	* {{Animorphism}}: In ''Wizards Don't Wear Graduation Gowns''.
73	* ArtisticLicensePhysics: ''Frankenstein Doesn't Plant Petunias'' has the kids making shaped bubbles, including stars and cubes. Soap bubbles are spherical no matter what because surface tension draws them into the tightest possible grouping of molecules -- a sphere.
74	* BizarreAlienBiology: Ms. Zork drains color by touching it.
75	* BluntMetaphorsTrauma: Ms. Zork doesn't pick up on any slang whatsoever.
76	-->'' Eddie:'' If that's a kiln, I'm a monkey's uncle.
77	-->'' Ms. Zork:'' Do not be silly. You look nothing like a monkey.
78	* BrokenMasquerade: Not quite, but if a trio of third graders can point out which grownup corresponds to what pop-culture monster, it's at the very least a "chipped" or "cracked" masquerade.
79	* CainAndAbel: Nessie and Jessie -- from ''Monsters Don't Scuba Dive'' and ''Sea Monsters Don't Ride Motorcycles'', respectively -- are strongly implied to be feuding sisters who got into a fight over a precious treasure that they found in the ocean.
80	* TheCameo: Numerous one-time characters from the other books appear in the illustrations in ''Bogeymen Don't Play Football'', cheering in the stand.
81	%%* CarpetOfVirility: [[WolfMan Mr. Jenkins]] is characterized by this.
82	%%* CityOfAdventure: If the grown-ups are monsters, then Bailey City is this.
83	* ClassicalMovieVampire: Mrs. Jeepers shows every sign of this, being a very suave and ladylike, and even bearing a [[VillainousWidowsPeak widow's peak]], her [[VampireVords Eastern European accent]], her [[LargeHam air for the dramatic]] when she's not being calm and menacing, and her outdated clothes. Although, in the book we meet her family in, they're peasants (farmers who lost a bet and are only allowed to harvest at night) instead of upper-middle nobility (counts).
84	* ContinuityNod: After Dr. Victor's assistant "Frank" becomes an ice hockey coach, he's seen around the ice-skating rink in several later books. His love of cookies is also referenced in later books after he meets his girlfriend Electra, who's a baker famous for her cookies.
85	%%* CoolOldLady: Eddie's grandmother is usually portrayed as this.
86	* CoolTeacher: Mrs. Jeepers, in spades. Although the kids initially suspect that she might be evil (which is left ambiguous), most of the books just portray her as a calm, collected, charmingly exotic woman who's ''really'' good at her job, and ''really'' knows how to keep her students in line.
87	* DefangedHorrors: Nearly none (the Phantom of the Opera and a color-stealing space alien nonwithstanding) of the monsters seem to mean any harm to anyone, they just seem to be trying to live as normal people. Even the ones who are described as uncontrollably eating people in folklore (werewolves and vampires spring to mind) don't do much in the way of terrorizing the populace.
88	* PrefersGoingBarefoot: Mr. Jenkins avoids wearing shoes until his cabin is filled with wolfsbane, at which point he puts shoes on.
89	* DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything: Although it may not have stood out in 1990, when ''Vampires Don't Wear Polka Dots'' was published, modern vampire mythology often puts them into a sexual context, making one wonder what Mrs. Jeepers did to Eddie in the last chapter.
90	* EarlyInstallmentWeirdness: The kids were portrayed as quite [[KidsAreCruel naughty and mischievous]] in the first book, to the point that they (apparently) drove their 3rd-grade teacher insane, and subsequently had to be [[ScareEmStraight scared straight]] by Mrs. Jeepers. Eddie, in particular, was explicitly described as [[TheBully the class bully]]. This was pretty quickly dropped after the first book, and later installments portrayed the kids as more curious than mischievous. Even Eddie was pretty quickly established as a JerkWithAHeartOfGold.
91	** Book five, ''Ghosts Don't Eat Potato Chips'', has an unusually non-standard plot compared to the rest of the series -- the kids never actually meet the ghost in question (considering he's, you know, a ghost), and instead of either explaining away what made the kids think they encountered a mythical creature or confirming that they were right to both them and the reader, it's made completely unambiguous to the ''reader'' that the ghost is real even though the kids themselves chalk it all up to coincidence in the end.
92	%%* EpilepticFlashingLights: Ms. Zork's spaceship suffers from this when Howie and Eddie tamper with it.
93	* {{Expy}}: The Pizza parlor from ''Dragons Don't Cook Pizza'' is one of the ''Medieval Times'' restaurant chains.
94	* FamilyThemeNaming: The sisters Nessie and Jessie -- from ''Monsters Don't Scuba Dive'' and ''Sea Monsters Don't Ride Motorcycles'', respectively. Subverted, in that they're only strongly ''hinted'' to be sisters, and we never actually see them together.
95	%%* FantasyKitchenSink: Just read the titles of the books.
96	* FireWaterJuxtaposition: Two books revolve around dragons: ''Dragons Don't Cook Pizza'' and ''Dragons Don't Throw Snowballs''. One is about a traditional fire-breathing dragon who may or may not be enslaved by a pizza chef, while the other is about an ice-breathing dragon who may or may not have been transfigured into life by an ice sculptor.
97	* FlawlessToken: Melody is the only black character in the main cast, and she's also the bravest, most polite, and most reasonable of the group. She is often pitted against Eddie, who is a redhead.
98	* FlyingSaucer: What Ms. Zork's race travels in, although she refers to them as [[InsistentTerminology "interplanetary transportation systems"]].
99	* ForcedTransformation: In Wizards Don’t Wear Graduation Gowns, the kids find animals that they believe used to be students who were transformed by the titular wizard.
100	%%* FourTemperamentEnsemble: Eddie is Sanguine, Melody is Choleric, Howie is Melancholic, and Liza is Phlegmatic.
101	* FrankensteinsMonster: Frankenstein's Monster gets a SettingUpdate to be alive in the '90s, now going by the name Frank. He is capable of full speech and has a friendly relationship with his creator, who introduces himself as Dr. Victor.
102	* FunetikAksent: Averted with Mrs. Jeepers; she is said to have a thick accent, but it does not translate into text.
103	* FunnyForeigner: Ms. Zork makes mention of how multiple things in Bailey City are not like where she is from. [[MaybeMagicMaybeMundane How far away her home is is debatable]].
104	* GirlishPigtails: Melody is always drawn with twintails, sometimes wearing a ponytail or braids within the story.
105	* GreenSkinnedSpaceBabe: Ms. Zork the white-skinned alien is quite a looker, particularly in the interior artwork.
106	* HauntedHouse: The Clancy House, which Ms. Jeepers moves into in the first book, is described like this by the students. Eddie's great aunt's house may or may not be haunted by the ghost of her dead husband, as revealed in ''Ghosts Don't Eat Potato Chips''.
107	* HollywoodPudgy: In ''Werewolves Don't Go To Summer Camp'', Liza is described as "plump" and "chubby" a few times, despite this never being mentioned in any of the earlier books, or seen in the pictures, where she's always been drawn as slim.
108	* HumanAliens:
109	** Ms. Zork, modeled after the fabled Nordic Aliens, with white hair and ivory skin.
110	** Mr. Sparks and Nurse Redding have implied alien features like "antennae and green skin, respectively."
111	* HypnoticEyes: Mrs. Jeepers' eyes flash green when she hypnotizes Eddie.
112	* IdiosyncraticEpisodeNaming: Each book features a title "[[HelloInsertNameHere <Insert Supernatural Creature Here>]] does not/don't <Insert Mundane Task Uncharacteristic to Said Creature Here>".
113	* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Eddie, who is originally described as the school bully, often comes off as this. Eddie is often quick to insult his friends and others alike but often gets moments where he shows he does care.
114	* KarmaHoudini: Howie and Eddie break into Ms. Zork's house and tamper with her "kiln" (which they believe is a spaceship), resulting in an explosion that destroys her house. Ms. Zork moves away and the boys are never charged for their crimes.
115	* LameComeback: Eddie is prone to these.
116	* {{Leprechaun}}: Mr. O'Grady uses [[AdvertisingCampaigns lucky charms]] to perform magic and is confined to {{Oireland}} due to the vampires stealing his people's [[MacGuffin magic gem]].
117	* LovePotion: ''Cupid Doesn't Flip Hamburgers'' has the kids believe the new lunch lady is making people fall in love with heart-shaped sugar cookies.
118	* MagiTek: One book heavily implies a dragon is being used to fire a pizza oven.
119	* MaybeMagicMaybeMundane: The books rarely come to a concrete conclusion over whether someone is or is not the creature the kids think they are. Except for "Ghosts Don't Eat Potato Chips."
120	* MindControlDevice: The school nurse from ''Martians Don't Take Temperatures'' may or may not be a Martian trying to control the kids' minds. She does it using a special green band that she attaches to their foreheads -- which instantly cures any illness, but also makes them unnaturally placid and docile.
121	* MistakenForSanta: The book ''Santa Claus Doesn't Mop Floors'' is about the kids speculating whether the kindly, bearded school janitor Mr. Jolly is really Santa Claus in disguise.
122	* TheMole: Allegedly, a vampire infiltrated the leprechauns' kingdom as the teacher of their children to take back the gem they stole and seal them in Ireland. It's heavily implied that Mrs. Jeepers was this vampire.
123	* MonsterOfTheWeek: Just about every book has a different person that the children believe to be a supernatural creature, with no clear indication on whether or not their suspicions are correct (except for ''Ghosts Don't Eat Potato Chips'', which makes it clear to the reader that the ghost was real even though the kids believe it was all coincidence).
124	%%* MysticalWhiteHair: Ms. Zork, although it turns blonde towards the end of the book.
125	* NonFatalExplosions: When Ms. Zork's "kiln" (implied to be a spaceship) blows up, it's explicitly stated that she was not hurt, even though her house is so heavily damaged that she has to move away.
126	* NoodleIncident: Whatever Mrs. Jeepers did to Eddie at the end of book one. He tries to pass it off as just a scolding in subsequent books, but it's clear he's hiding something, and he's shaken whenever it's brought up.
127	* {{Oireland}}: "Magic" O'Grady's nationality. Howie's grandmother also hails from there.
128	* OurGhostsAreDifferent: Eddie's Great-Uncle Jasper is confined to the attic of his widow's house and invisible most of the time, although he can make himself visible briefly, and interact with things like potato chips.
129	* OurGoblinsAreDifferent: Apparently goblins are plump middle aged men who teach computer classes, play video games that resemble ''Franchise/{{Castlevania}}'' and ''VideoGame/GhostsNGoblins'', and are [[NeatFreak Neat Freaks]].
130	* OurVampiresAreDifferent: Mrs. Jeepers can go out in the sunlight (which vampires in the original legends were able to do, although it's implied to have something to do with her brooch), but has an allergy to garlic and is shown to be able to hypnotize people. It's implied that she sleeps in a coffin and can feed off people.
131	* OurWerewolvesAreDifferent: Mr. Jenkins is shown to turn into a hairy humanoid on nights surrounding the full moon, and prefers raw meat in human form. Exposure to wolfsbane causes him to turn far less hairy, looking just like an ordinary person at all times.
132	* PrecociousCrush: Eddie has one on Christine the opera singer in ''Phantoms Don't Drive Sports Cars'', not that he wants to admit to liking her or opera.
133	* QuirkyTown: If the adults are not monsters, then Bailey City is this.
134	* {{Recurring Character}}s: A few of the "monsters" show up in multiple books. Notable examples include Dr. Victor and his assistant Frank, Mr. Jenkins the Summer camp coach, and Mr. Drake the guidance counselor. Nessie (the swimming coach at Camp Lone Wolf) is also referenced in another book, though she doesn't appear.
135	* SantaClaus: Mr. Jolly is shown to have magical abilities, visits a different school every year to check on the local kids, and drives a [[CoolCar red sports car]] with the license plate reading [[VanityLicensePlate "HOHOHO"]].
136	* SealedEvilInACan: Although not evil so much as tricksters, the leprechauns were confined to {{Oireland}} by the vampires.
137	* SelfPlagiarism: An entire page was reused whenever the character Howie visited his dad at the [[FunWithAcronyms Federal Aerospace Technology Station]], depicting their entrance and the facility itself.
138	* SeriesContinuityError: In ''Sea Monsters Don't Ride Motorcycles'' we meet Jessie who reveals the character from ''Monsters Don't Scuba Dive'' is her sister but the characters reference her as doing the events the character from ''Mermaids Don't Run Track'' did instead.
139	* ShownTheirWork: In ''Frankenstein Doesn't Plant Petunias'', Liza gives a surprisingly good summary of Mary Shelley's ''Frankenstein'', avoiding most of the [[CommonKnowledge misinformation]] that has been ingrained in the public's minds after the movie. The only one mentioned is the angry mob at the climax, and Frankenstein's fear of fire, both of which are plot points in the movie. The follow-up ''Frankenstein Doesn't Slam Hockey Pucks'' also features the kids speculating that Frank learned to ice-skate at the North Pole -- referencing the relatively little-known ending of the novel, where the Creature flees to the North Pole.
140	* SignificantGreenEyedRedhead: Mrs. Jeepers is described as having pumpkin orange hair and, of course, those infamous hypnotic green eyes.
141	* SpiritualAntithesis: Intentionally or not, the series' premise is essentially "''Franchise/ScoobyDoo'' in reverse". Most of the books are about monsters who pretend to be ordinary people (not [[ScoobyDooHoax the other way around]]), the audience [[MaybeMagicMaybeMundane usually never finds out]] if the monsters are ''actually'' monsters, and most of the "monsters" are shown to be [[DarkIsNotEvil perfectly nice people with mundane jobs and hobbies]].
142	* SternTeacher: Mrs. Jeepers
143	* TakeOurWordForIt: Whatever Mrs. Jeepers did to Eddie in the first book is briefly explained at the beginning of the second: Mrs. Jeepers scolded Eddie.
144	* TastesLikeFeet: Eddie's reaction to Howie's favorite flavor of potato chip (garlic) is that it "tastes like warthog".
145	* TitleDrop: [[OnceAnEpisode Once a book]]. Almost -- It's absent in ''Werewolves Don't Go To Summer Camp'', though that could be chalked up to EarlyInstallmentWeirdness.
146	%%* TokenMinority: Melody
147	* TrueMeaningOfChristmas: The ending to ''Santa Claus Doesn't Mop Floors''.
148	* VampireEpisode: the books "Vampires Don't Wear Polka Dots", "Dracula Doesn't Drink Lemonade", "Dracula Doesn't Rock and Roll", "Dracula Doesn't Play Kickball", "Vampires DO Hunt Marshmallows", "Vampire Trouble", and "Vampire Baby".
149	* VampireVords: Somewhat averted in that she's said to have a realistic Romanian accent, rather than the exaggerated one that comes with the trope.
150	* VileVillainSaccharineShow: Erik Gaston, the violinist the kids suspect of being a TheatrePhantom in ''Phantoms Don't Drive Sports Cars'', is nowhere ''near'' as goofy and hammy as most of the series's ambiguously mythical adults, and his obsession with pretty opera singer Christine extends to possibly threatening Eddie (who is ''nine'') for taking up any of Christine's attention whatsoever (even though again, Eddie is nine years old and Christine is simply being nice to a child). He comes off worse than the original Phantom of the Opera, due to his lack of a comparable FreudianExcuse and no sign of the original's occasional bleeding-heart tendencies.
151	* WhosLaughingNow: The kids' last teacher before Mrs. Jeepers quit because of Eddie's pranks, but before she did, she warned the kids that they were going to be sorry before letting out a cackle.
152	%%* WolfMan: Between the descriptions and the illustrations, Mr. Jenkins is probably something like this.
153	* YouKnowTheOne: Referring to Mr. Jolly as "SC" feels particularly unnatural after a while.

Context Literature / BaileySchoolKids