Line #23 Funny/TsubasaAbridged


1	Since it's an abridged series, it's not surprising that Tsubasa abridged has these:
2
3	!!Episode 1
4
5	* Sakura discussing the new show with Syaoran:
6	--->'''Syaoran''': Only this time we're older. And you know what that means...\
7	'''Sakura''': [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Damn you, teenage angst!]]\
8	'''Syaoran''': Well, yeah that. And ''other'' things...\
9	'''Sakura''': Damn you, teenage hormones!
10	* Touya and Yukito lamenting the fact that they've been DemotedToExtra. And when Touya wonders who's going to replace them...
11	--->'''[[CampGay Fai]]''': Oh, I wouldn't worry about that...
12	** Yukito's voice. To paint a picture it sounds like what [[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Waylon Smithers]] would be if he was [[CrossdressingVoices were voiced by a woman]]. Which, [[FridgeBrilliance if you think about it]], [[SubordinateExcuse actually]] [[StoicSpectacles kind of]] [[StraightGay makes sense]].
13	* The flashing sign that says "FANSERVICE" when Fai jumps out of a pool of water [[ShirtlessScene shirtless]].
14	--->'''Chi''': Was that really necessary?
15	--->'''Fai''': Jealous, are we?
16	* [[ComedicSociopathy Tomoyo's reaction when she finds out that Kurogane went on a homicidal rampage]] ''[[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking when she specifically told him not to]]'' (emphasis NOT added):
17	--->'''Tomoyo''': Oh he is so getting a spanking!
18	* Syaoran's reaction when Sakura's feathers scatter:
19	--->'''Syaoran''': She fell! And then went all [[BuffySpeak explodey!]] [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Is that bad?]]
20	* "[[Film/TheWizardOfOz Well, I'm off to see the Wizard!]] I mean the Dimensional Witch!"
21	* Syaoran's first question when he sees [[Manga/XxxHolic Yuuko's shop]]: "Did I land in a {{Goth}} convention!?"
22	** His request for Yuuko.
23	--->'''Syaoran''': I ''really'' have to go to the bathroom!
24	--->'''Yuuko''': [[DeadpanSnarker You're not that bright, are you kid?]]
25
26	!!Episode 2
27
28	* Yuuko explaining how the group's wishes are "the same". Syaoran... doesn't quite [[LateToThePunchline get it]].
29	* The entire sequence where Yuuko does her EquivalentExchange thing:
30	** After Yuuko asks for Kurogane to give her his sword and he refuses, she accuses him of "CompensatingForSomething".
31	** Yuuko taking Fai's tattoo.
32	--->'''Yuuko''': From you, I want your tattoo.\
33	'''Fai''': Wouldn't you rather have this expensive looking staff? Think of all the booze you could buy from hocking this thing!
34	--->(''Beat'')
35	--->'''Yuuko''': No.
36	--->'''Fai''': Okay, fine. But if we all die I'm coming back to haunt you!
37	** Syaoran: [[ComedicSociopathy I can pay with this lovely Princess Sakura! She's almost like new, except for a little bit of brain damage...]] Or not.
38	** Syaoran mistaking Yuuko's request for lolicon.
39	--->'''Syaoran''': Keep your pedophilic lesbian hands off her!
40	*** And Yuuko's response. "That's not what I meant." [[FunWithSubtitles Thinking: God,]] [[INeedAFreakingDrink I need a drink...]]
41	** Mokona: You aren't going to lock me in the basement again are you?
42	** Yuuko: Now, all of you, get off my lawn. I'm sick of looking at you!
43	* ''Franchise/TheTwilightZone'' music playing when the group is transported between the worlds.
44	* "My name is Fai and I'm a compulsive liar! That cloak looks simply ''fabulous'' on you by the way."
45	** Fai calling Kurogane "Mr. Hotpants Frownyface" and Kurogane's reaction:
46	--->'''Kurogane''': Are you hitting on me or insulting me?
47	* "Flashback Count: 1"
48	* The Theatre/WestSideStory joke.
49	* "There was a feather stuck to me this entire time? How very convenient and not at all suspicious!" "[[MediumAwareness Thank God Syaoran's never read the manga]]..."
50	* "[[SayingSoundEffectsOutLoud Boom.]]" "[[ItMakesAsMuchSenseInContext Oooh the irony...]]"
51	* "Look boss! A pedestrian!" "Let's shoot him! Because killing bystanders is fun!"
52	* [[FunWithSubtitles PWNED (by a rock)]]
53	* "FLAME ON!"
54	** "And I thought ''you'' were [[CampGay flaming]]...
55
56	!!Episode 3
57	* "Are we having flashbacks to things that haven't even happened yet?"
58	* Shogo's [[Franchise/{{Pokemon}} Squirtle]].
59	* Syaoran trying to give Sakura's feather back.
60	--->'''Fay''': Syaoran, I don't think shoving it in her mouth is going to work. More importantly, I'd like to know [[ItMakesSenseInContext how that kid over there reproduced asexually]].
61	* Sorata telling the group that if they fail to pay rent he'll have to break their legs.
62	--->'''Mokona''': Break 'em good!
63	* [[Theatre/{{Cats}} Memory]] playing when Syaoran has another flashback.
64	** "Damn, she looks good walking away!"
65	* "I must never let them know that I'm scared of the dark."
66	* The curse Tomoyo put on Kurogane
67	--->'''Tomoyo''': That is a curse that will make every slightly effeminate bishonen in the area hit on you relentlessly...''and you will subconsciously like it!''
68	--->'''Kurogane''': Damn you!!!
69	* "What do you think, Sexy Back?" "Stop calling me that!" "Sure thing, Hot Cakes."
70	* This gem:
71	--->'''Syaoran''': (''after Kurogane runs off'') Should we follow him?
72	--->'''Fay''': Maybe we should keep him on a leash...with a spiked collar...and leather straps...and by "we" I mean "I".
73	* "Everyone's abandoning us. I think it's ''your'' fault."
74	* The gang leader asking Kurogane out.
75	* The end credits with Kurogane lip-synching to ''Sexy Back''. Fay popping in every now and again for the background vocals just makes it funnier.
76	* Sakura waking up in TheStinger.
77	!!Episode 4
78	* "Yeah, that dead girl you had in your room? I kinda lost her..."
79	** "How do you lose a comatose?"
80	* "Oh well, back to pedophilia!"
81	* Sakura's response when Shogo asks if she wants to ride his big, strong...Squirtle.
82	--->'''Sakura''': Didn't my parents tell me not to go for rides with strangers? Oh right I have amnesia!
83	* This:
84	--->'''Sakura''': Oh, for the love of God! You were not in the Manga/{{X1999}} manga! They only wrote you into the movie because they hadn't come up with Kakyo yet.
85	--->(''Beat'')
86	--->'''Shogo''': I was too!
87	--->'''Sakura''': That's it, I'm jumping. I'd rather kill myself than listen to more of you talk!
88	* Sakura's reaction when she starts flying. Or not.
89	* "It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "No! It's Princess Sakura!"
90	* "I'm glad I took all those princess grabbing classes!"
91	* Mokona and the kid who was following the group getting kidnapped by Primela. And no one cares.
92	** And [[TheUnintelligible Mokona]] singing what sounds suspiciously like ''[[WesternAnimation/TheLionKing1994 Hakuna Matata]]''.
93	*** Primela forgetting to send the ransom note.
94	* Primela declaring herself the "[[SmallNameBigEgo world's leading]] [[EvilDiva female popstar]]". Syaoran's never heard of her.
95	* "It feels like every brain cell in my head is turning on the one next to it and they're all setting each other on fire..."
96	* Mokona: Who said I wanted to be rescued by you chumps?
97	* This exchange:
98	--->'''Primela''':[[AttentionWhore QUIT IGNORING ME!]]
99	--->'''Fay''': Or what? You'll dye our hair unnatural colors?
100	** And then this one:
101	--->'''Primela''': [[ThePowerOfRock I CALL UPON THE POWER OF POP STARDOM!]]
102	--->'''Fay''': [[TakeThat Oh, so you're going to lip-synch?]]
103	* Fay shouting every action he does when Primera throws an attack at him, like "Dodge!", "Running and Jumping!" etc.
104	* When Fay gets into an...[[TheCharmer interesting]] position with Primela:
105	--->'''Kurogane''': Oh my God, is he actually straight!?
106	--->'''Fay''': How about some Barbara Streisand instead?

Context Funny / TsubasaAbridged