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1!!Johnny Van Owen
2[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/johnny_vlcsnap_2015_09_20_22h54m32s193.png]]
3
4->Played by: Music/VanillaIce
5
6A biker and rapper, who drifts from town to town with fellow biker friends. Johnny's a rebellious type who prefers not to be tied down anywhere, but regardless, while stuck in a small, milquetoast town, he falls hard for do-gooder Kathy.
7
8* BadassBiker: A very early [[TheNineties 90s]] take on this.
9* BeYourself: Fiercely believes in this.
10-->'''Johnny:''' If you ain't true to yourself, you ain't true to nobody. Live your life for someone else, you ain't living. Straight up fact.
11* BoastfulRap: In typical Vanilla Ice fashion.
12* CatchPhrase: "Yup yup."
13* CoolPeopleRebelAgainstAuthority: Played straight.
14* CoolShades: Actually, they are pretty cool shades.
15* LovableRogue: SureLetsGoWithThat.
16* [[IAmNotLeonardNimoy I Am Not Vanilla Ice]]: Despite the fact Vanilla Ice is playing a character named Johnny, he's still just playing his public Vanilla Ice persona in the film and most viewers and critics tend to refer to him as Vanilla Ice instead.
17* ImprobableHairstyle: Check out the brick design and lightning bolt shaved into his hair.
18* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: The movie seems to be trying to portray Ice as one. Whether it succeeds is up to interpretation.
19* JiveTurkey: Obviously he wasn't ''meant'' to come off like this, but, well, the Ice phenomenon was over by the time this hit (select) theatres.
20* KavorkaMan: Despite having an obnoxious personality and having [[RummageSaleReject questionable fashion taste]], Johnny captures Kathy's affections early on.
21* ManicPixieDreamGuy: Johnny serves this role for Kathy. Credit where it's due, [[GenderFlip you don't see this one often.]]
22* MightyWhitey: Johnny is the only white member of his crew, but is more or less their leader.
23* MrFanservice: The female fans Vanilla Ice still had when this movie was released were not disappointed.
24* TheNicknamer:
25** Upon finding out that his LoveInterest is named Kathy, Johnny immediately decides to call her "Kat." She appears to be totally indifferent to the name, never even commenting on it.
26** He also calls her boyfriend Nick "Dick." Nick naturally objects to this.
27* NoSocialSkills: How else to explain introducing himself to the object of his desire by knocking her off a horse? And then there's breaking into her bedroom.
28* PetTheDog: He's actually a pretty nice guy to Tommy.
29* PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy: Johnny is played by the king of the trope, no less.
30* RummageSaleReject: Ice- sorry, [[IAmNotLeonardNimoy Johnny]] is an eyesore for much of the movie. He wears all sorts of absurd outfits including a leather jacket with a bajillion slogans on it, pants that are a thousand different colors alongside an orange jacket, and the technicolor suit in the closing sequence.
31* StalkerWithACrush: More or less this for Kathy. The most egregious example is him breaking into her bedroom and waking her up. (With [[ActorAllusion ice]].)
32* TalkToTheFist: The climactic scene with the bad guys pretty much goes like this.
33* TokenWhite: The only white guy in his posse.
34
35!!Sir D, Jazz & Princess
36[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/posse_vlcsnap_2015_09_21_16h56m57s43.png]]
37[[caption-width-right:350:Left to right: Sir D, Princess, Johnny & Jazz.]]
38
39->Played by: Deezer D (Jazz), Kevin Hicks (Sir D), Allison Dean (Princess)
40
41Johnny's posse, who travel with him.
42
43* {{Badass Biker}}s: Again, a very early [[TheNineties 90s]] take on this.
44* BizarreTasteInFood: Jazz makes a sandwich with chunky peanut butter, pickles, sardines, mustard, and pineapple.
45* CoolBike: They go from town to town on these. Jazz' bike breaking down is what kicks off the plot.
46* CoolShades: Just look at Sir D in the above pic!
47* LetsGetDangerous: From the moment Tommy gets kidnapped, they go from goofy and laid back to deadly serious. However, given all the {{Narm}} in this movie, it's not very effective or noticeable.
48* TheQuietOne: Sir D doesn't say much, and seems to be in his own little world much of the time.
49* {{Sarcastic Devotee}}s: The crew all tease each other in good fun.
50* {{Satellite Character}}s: Jazz gets the most dialogue because he gets the plot started, but much of the time they're just there for the sake of Johnny having a crew.
51* TheSmurfettePrinciple: Princess.
52* TalkToTheFist: Alongside Johnny, this is their preferred method of dealing with the bad guys at the climax.
53* TrueCompanions: Johnny's a boor who has absolutely no concept of subtlety or boundaries, but his homeboys (and homegirl) remain loyal to him.
54
55!!Kathy Winslow
56[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/kathy_vlcsnap_2015_09_20_23h19m38s31.png]]
57
58->Played by: Kristen Minter
59
60A straight-A student and equestrian who had rather conservative upbringing, in contrast to Johnny, whom she becomes attracted to. The resulting relationship brings out her hidden desires to "do something crazy."
61
62* BreakTheCutie: From TheReveal of her family's past to her little brother being kidnapped.
63* DefrostingIceQueen: The basis of her romance with Johnny. Can't ''imagine'' why she'd ever be resistant!
64* DesperatelyLookingForAPurposeInLife: Reveals she's this to Johnny.
65* FoolishSiblingResponsibleSibling: With Tommy.
66* GirlPosse: Does have a few female friends she seems to hang out with regularly, but we don't see too much of them, though.
67* GrewASpine: Ostensibly does this over the course of the film.
68* LoveInterest: For Johnny, of course.
69* TheTeetotaler: Does not approve of Nick's drinking during the Sugar Shack scene. Granted, they're [[DawsonCasting supposed]] to be underage.
70* {{Tsundere}}: The [[EpilepticTrees only conceivable explanation]] for why Kathy acts the way she does; aka, randomly falling in love with a guy who's done nothing but be a {{Jerkass}} to her. Although given that her (ex-)boyfriend Nick is a massive {{Jerkass}} in ''every'' scene, it's likely she just has appalling taste in men.
71* UndyingLoyalty: To Johnny, despite her father's best interests.
72
73!!Gordon Winslow
74[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/michael_vlcsnap_2015_09_21_17h12m02s138.png]]
75
76->Played by: Creator/MichaelGross
77
78Kathy's father, (apparently) an insurance salesman. Formerly a cop, but was put in the Witness Relocation Program after exposing chicanery between two fellow police officers. However, he's discovered early in the movie when he appears on television with Kathy. Believes Johnny to be associated with the bad guys.
79
80* DisapprovingLook: Johnny gets heaping helpings of this.
81* DullSurprise: Often.
82* PapaWolf: ''Immediately'' suspicious of Johnny after seeing him with Clark and Morrisey.
83* PaperThinDisguise: He has his fingers awkwardly held up to his face while appearing on TV early in the movie. Real smooth.
84* ProperlyParanoid: Of Johnny, given some of his less-desirable behavior in this movie. Granted, he's paranoid for the wrong reason and Johnny does become the LesserOfTwoEvils.
85* TheReveal: Only halfway through does he tell Kathy of his real history as a policeman. Kathy doesn't take it so well at the time.
86
87!!Tommy Winslow
88[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/tommy_vlcsnap_2015_09_21_16h37m08s162.png]]
89
90->Played by: Victor [=DiMattia=]
91
92Kathy's little brother, whom she has a playfully antagonistic relationship with. He's immediately fascinated by Johnny.
93
94* BrattyHalfPint: Not quite as annoying as some cases, but that might be just in comparison to the rest of the cast.
95* DirtyKid: Holds up the movie's sex joke quota by himself.
96* DistressedDude: In the third act.
97* FromTheMouthsOfBabes: Tommy's a friendly kid, but he's got a big mouth. "As soon as you're done making sex?!"
98* HostageSituation: Victim of this.
99* ImportantHaircut: In a display of hero worship, he chops his hair into a crude approximation of Johnny's TotallyRadical style.
100* PluckyComicRelief: The funniest character in the movie.
101* TheSlacker: We never see him at baseball practice as he apparently regularly goes to. Much of his time in the film is spent playing [[UsefulNotes/NintendoEntertainmentSystem Nintendo.]]
102
103!!Nick
104[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/nick_vlcsnap_2015_09_21_22h46m11s185.png]]
105
106->Played by: John Newton
107
108Kathy's boyfriend. He is immediately disgusted by Johnny's rebellious attitude, which is understandable, but he overreacts about Johnny so boorishly that Kathy starts preferring Johnny.
109
110* CrazyJealousGuy: So crazy, he's driven to vandalism!
111* HotBlooded: Nick's a pretty grouchy young man, and -- Johnny aside -- it's a mystery what Kathy saw in him in the first place.
112* {{Jerkass}}: This guy does ''not'' handle jealousy well. Sure, Johnny's not the most pleasant of guys, but Nick doesn't endear himself the way he practically forces himself on Kathy and later tries to smash Johnny's bike (which [[MisplacedRetribution turns out to not even be Johnny's]]).
113* JerkJock: Ostensibly moreso than Johnny.
114* PhraseCatcher: Johnny constantly calling him "Dick."
115* ThePreciousPreciousCar: His white Corvette.
116* VehicularSabotage: On Sir D's bike.
117
118!!Roscoe & Mae
119[[quoteright:296:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/old_couple_vlcsnap_2015_09_20_22h53m13s35.png]]
120
121->Played by: Creator/SydneyLassick (Roscoe), Dody Goodman (Mae)
122
123A [[CloudCuckoolander very kooky]] old couple whose home is one of the most bizarre pieces of architecture since ''Series/PeeWeesPlayhouse.'' When Jazz' bike breaks down, it's Roscoe who lets them stay while he and Mae work on it.
124
125* BunnyEarsLawyer: Especially Roscoe.
126* CloudCuckooland: What is ''up'' with their house? It's like one big acid flashback.
127* {{CloudCuckoolander}}s: Their initial MistakenIdentity exchange with Johnny and his crew firmly centers them in this trope.
128* CoolOldGuy[=/=]CoolOldLady: Two of the more interesting characters in the movie.
129* DestructiveSavior: Roscoe is this at first, when he takes Jazz' bike completely apart, instead of, you know, fixing it.
130* GadgeteerGenius: Double subverted. They claim they're the best mechanics around, but in the first act all they do is succeed in taking it completely apart, prolonging the posse's stay with them. But later, the bike is back together, good as new, as promised.
131* {{Leitmotif}}: A few of their scenes are accompanied by this goofy, carnival-esque organ music, just to remind us, the viewing audience, that these people are weirdos.
132* MistakenIdentity: They have a goofy misunderstanding and mistake Johnny and his crew for people they were supposed to do business with.
133* PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy: They really get into the idea of ''dancing'' like Johnny's posse. And they actually aren't terrible!
134
135!!Clark & Morrisey
136[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/bad_guys_vlcsnap_2015_09_22_10h49m32s16.png]]
137[[caption-width-right:350:Left: Morrisey. Right: Clark.]]
138
139->Played by: Creator/JackMcGee (Clarke), S.A. Griffin (Morrisey)
140
141The aforementioned bad cops, who discover Gordon's location and become a threat to him and his family.
142
143* BadassBoast: Morrisey gets off a genuinely good one.
144-->'''Tommy:''' Back off, I've seen America's Most Wanted!
145-->'''Morrisey:''' Oh, yeah? Did you see the episode I was on? ''[cuts the phone cord]''
146* BaldOfEvil: Morrisey.
147* {{Big Bad}}s: Of the movie and of much of Gordon's life.
148* CurbStompBattle: Their final comeuppance.
149* {{Dirty Cop}}s: Dirty enough to take hostages.
150* FatAndSkinny: Clark's the heavy-set guy, Morrisey's the balding, lanky guy. In a twist on the trope, Morrisey is the guy shown constantly obsessed with eating.
151* FauxAffablyEvil: Crack a lot of dumb jokes throughout the movie, but always have Gordon shaking in his boots. It's most obvious in the final act, when they engage in goofy repartee to torment a child they kidnapped.
152* HarmlessVillain: They seem this way at first. Despite carrying guns, they prefer to act threatening to achieve their goals. [[SubvertedTrope Then they kidnap Tommy...]]
153* KickTheDog: By abducting Tommy.
154* LaughablyEvil: Morrisey is... an ''attempt'' at this kind of villain.
155* ObsessedWithFood: Morrisey even fantasizes about eating junk food while spinning the barrel of a gun around.
156* ObviouslyEvil: To a laughable extent.
157* TrademarkFavoriteFood: Morrisey is all about fast food in general.
158* {{Troll}}s: Johnny asks them for directions to the Sugar Shack, and they waste several minutes of his time by giving him fake directions, again and again. (Of course, it gives Johnny enough time to [[NotWhatItLooksLike be seen with them, by Gordon.]])
159* WouldHurtAChild: In this case, Tommy. They aren't shown actually harming Tommy, though there are heaping helpings of psychological abuse. And it's pretty plain that neither would bat an eye at striking him if came down to it.

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