Line #4 BlindIdiotTranslation/Jokes


1	[[BlindIdiotTranslation Spoken happiness]] (Jokes)
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3	* There is a joke about a German tourist in an English restaurant who wants to order "ein blutiges Steak" (a rare steak). He asks for "a [[DidNotDoTheBloodyResearch bloody]] steak" and the waiter asks him if he wants some fucking potatoes with it.
4	** Better yet is the version which has the Pope going to a steakhouse and ordering a rare steak, then hearing the waiter yell through an order for "One bloody steak!". The Pope is suitably mollified by the explanation that this is the usual expression in the catering trade in New York (or wherever the story is set). He returns a day or two later with one of the cardinals and asks the waiter for "two bloody steaks", and the cardinal, not to be outdone, adds...
5	** A similar joke about the German word "bekommen" (a [[InMyLanguageThatSoundsLike false friend]]; it means "to get" -- as in "to obtain", not "to become"): an impatient customer asks when he'll become a steak, and the waiter replies "I hope never, Sir!"
6	* There is a Russian joke (probably based on a scene with a similar joke in ''Film/{{Casablanca}}'') about two people meeting on the street somewhere in London. Their conversion goes thus:
7	-> - Which watch? [[note]] the speaker means "Which hour?", which is very common way to ask for time in Russian; Russian word "часы" could mean either "hours" or "wristwatch."[[/note]]
8	--> - Six clocks. [[note]] again, word "часы" could mean "hours" or "clock"; this speaker means "six hours."[[/note]]
9	--> - Such much? [[note]] "So late?" or something like that.[[/note]]
10	--> - Whom how. [[note]] Literal translation of Russian "кому как", which is a common idiom for saying "depends on the point of view."[[/note]]
11	--> - MGIMO finishd? [[note]] MGIMO is an acronym for one of the top Russian colleges for those who would work in foreign relations. Presumably their command of English is the best in Russia. Extra points if you can pronounce it so that it's clear it is "finishd", not "finished."[[/note]]
12	--> - Ask! [[note]] Russan: "Спрашиваете!", literally "You ask!" is a short form of "You even need to ask!", meaning "Of course."[[/note]]
13	* Russian jokes love to do this with English in general, as everything can be a mondegreen. A popular joke about the English saying "Easy come, easy go" means "Izya came, then Izya left".
14	** As an example of this, when Vidal Sassoon shampoo brand was advertised with its GratuitousEnglish slogan "Vidal Sasson - wash and go", a joke was that the aforementioned slogan translates as "a lice will leave when it sees a sucker".
15	* There is a French joke that goes like this:
16	** A man sees an ad for "Fast English Lessons". He enters the building and asks: "This the place where I can take English lessons?" "If, if, between!" (''Si'' being both the word used for a hypothetical statement: "If" and the affirmative answer to a negative question: "Yes"; ''Entre'' is the imperative form of the verb ''Entrer'', which means "enter", and also the word corresponding to "between").
17	** An American nun goes to France but gets lost. She asks a local if he speaks English and he proudly responds "Yes, sir" ("sœur" (Sister) is pronounced the same as "sir").

Context BlindIdiotTranslation / Jokes