History Quotes / TheDilbertPrinciple

->''Someone who sucked so much on ''Series/InsideEdition'' that Creator/{{Fox|NewsChannel}} decided to give him a job as a bs artist on its network. Also, he hates celebrities because they wouldn't give him the time of day on said ''Inside Edition'' show. Likes to use vibrators on himself.''

->''Let's consider, first of all, Eric Saward's television experience prior to writing [[{{Recap/DoctorWhoS19E4TheVisitation}} The Visitation.]] Well. That was a short list. OK, let's move on to his television experience prior to becoming script editor then: The Visitation. If ever there was a case of promoting someone too fast, this is surely it.''

-->--'''Phil Sandifer''' [[http://www.philipsandifer.com/2012/02/one-tiny-little-gap-in-universe-left.html on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'', ''[[Franchise/DoctorWhoExpandedUniverse Slipback]]''

->''The army with its unerring gift for placing people where they would be least useful and most vulnerable had made the nearly blind Sibley a scout. His reported adventures began when his only pair of glasses was broken and the army's difficulty in supplying him with a new pair reduced his utility as a scout in freezing weather... It is my impression that the so-called 'best and brightest' were routinely killed off which might explain [[TallPoppySyndrome the notoriously low level]] of those now in political life and, to be fair, in the arts as well.''
-->--'''Creator/GoreVidal''', ''Point to Point Navigation''

->'''OOC:''' Why was '''{{Wrestling/Balls|Mahoney}}''' hired, anyway?\\
'''Jay:''' "[[Wrestling/VinceMcMahon Bah, ECW, he's an alum, grumble grumble he's an original, The Originator!]]" I don't fuckin' know. 'Cause he was pickin' the garbage and he agreed to work for 20 quid or something.\\
'''V1:''' A ham sandwich.
-->--''WebVideo/OSWReview'' on ''{{Wrestling/ECW}} One Night Stand 2006''

->''Folks, I could go on and on about how Art’s knowledge of the product was less-than-nil. I could belabor how his “[[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Grampa Simpson]]” style of delivery piped up with some bit of nonsense just often enough to [[LesserStar remind you he was there]], while at the same time, chasing all other cohesive thoughts from your mind. I could raise the concern that his repeated inquiries of 'Did dat really hurt ‘im?' [[{{Kayfabe}} didn’t do any favors]] for us on the suspension-of-disbelief front.''

->The infamous '[[UsefulNotes/WorldWarII Battle of the Bulge]]' in France during winter must have been a particular horror for barely trained eighteen-year-old soldiers. Later, I was shown some of Sibley's letters. The army with its unerring gift for placing people where they would be least useful and most vulnerable had made the nearly blind Sibley a scout. His reported adventures began when his only pair of glasses was broken and the army's difficulty in supplying him with a new pair reduced his utility as a scout in freezing weather... It is my impression that the so-called 'best and brightest' were routinely killed off which might explain [[TallPoppySyndrome the notoriously low level]] of those now in political life and, to be fair, in the arts as well.

->Let's just get this out of the way: As a whole, our society is horrible at getting human beings into the jobs they're most suited for. Look around you -- you'll find yourself under managers who shouldn't even be trusted to manage a stuffed animal tea party, and you'll meet brilliant creative minds who are stuck spinning signs while dressed as Little Caesar.

->You would think there is a higher bar than having a Facebook page to run for president.
-->--'''Bill Maher''' on 2008 U.S. Vice Presidential candidate UsefulNotes/SarahPalin

'''Jay:''' [Wrestling/VinceMcMahon voice] ''"Bah, ECW, he's an ''alum'' grumble grumble he's an original, Teh Originator!"'' I don't fuckin' know. 'Cause he was pickin' the garbage and he agreed to work for 20 quid or something.\\
'''V1:''' A ham sandwich.\\
'''Jay:''' Talentless.

-> Folks, I could go on and on about how Art’s knowledge of the product was less-than-nil. I could belabor how his “[[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Grampa Simpson]]” style of delivery piped up with some bit of nonsense just often enough to [[LesserStar remind you he was there]], while at the same time, chasing all other cohesive thoughts from your mind. I could raise the concern that his repeated inquiries of 'Did dat really hurt ‘im?' [[{{Kayfabe}} didn’t do any favors]] for us on the suspension-of-disbelief front. Or I could just point to the below example that every time the camera showed Art, he just generally looked befuddled as hell.

->Somehow, Square Enix concluded the most suitable recipient of ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXII''[='s=] executive producer reins was a man who has pretty much been quoted as saying "yeah, I'm aware that the games I've made have [[VideoGame/FinalFantasyII never been]], [[VideoGame/LegendOfMana you know]]...[[VideoGame/SaGaRPG good]].
-->--'''Pat R.''', [[http://socksmakepeoplesexy.net/index.php?a=ff12 "The Twelfth Final Fantasy"]]

->Look, I know we go on and on about the various celebrities and media outlets who continue to attach themselves to Richardson, but no matter how loudly people scream about what a terrible, shitball of a human being he is, there seems to be no shortage of famous people who are willing to laugh it off and gleefully pose in his terrible photos...I have shot better pictures of my feet accidentally while I was drunk. COME ON.

-> Folks, I could go on and on about how Art’s knowledge of the product was less-than-nil. I could belabor how his “[[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Grampa Simpson]]” style of delivery piped up with some bit of nonsense just often enough to [[TheGarfunkel remind you he was there]], while at the same time, chasing all other cohesive thoughts from your mind. I could raise the concern that his repeated inquiries of 'Did dat really hurt ‘im?' [[{{Kayfabe}} didn’t do any favors]] for us on the suspension-of-disbelief front. Or I could just point to the below example that every time the camera showed Art, he just generally looked befuddled as hell.

->Somehow, Square Enix concluded the most suitable recipient of ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXII''[='s=] executive producer reins was a man who has pretty much been quoted as saying "yeah, I'm aware that the games I've made have [[VideoGame/FinalFantasyII never been]], [[VideoGame/LegendOfMana you know]]...[[{{Franchise/SaGaRPG}} good]].

->Somehow, Square Enix concluded the most suitable recipient of ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXII''[='s=] executive producer reins was a man who has pretty much been quoted as saying "yeah, I'm aware that the games I've made have [[VideoGame/FinalFantasyII never been]], [[VideoGame/LegendOfMana you know]]...[[{{VideoGame/SaGa}} good]].

-->--'''Bill Maher''' on 2008 U.S. Vice Presidential candidate SarahPalin

'''Jay:''' [VinceMcMahon voice] ''"Bah, ECW, he's an ''alum'' grumble grumble he's an original, Teh Originator!"'' I don't fuckin' know. 'Cause he was pickin' the garbage and he agreed to work for 20 quid or something.\\

->'''Jay:''' [[Wrestling/BallsMahoney Mahoney]] gets the three in 5:04 -- of ''[[{{Jobber}} course]]'' he did. Balls was hired for the new ECW, while [[Wrestling/MasatoTanaka Tanaka]] was not. And Tanaka is '''not''' bumping for him like he would for 'else.\\
'''V1:''' And he fucking shouldn't.\\
'''OOC:''' It was a waste of time--Why was '''Balls''' hired, anyway?\\

->Fuck you on ''my'' behalf, fuck you on the behalf of all the wrestling fans who have to suffer through the effluvia that you put out on the airwaves, fuck you for the professional wrestlers' careers that you have shortened or made less profitable, fuck you for the wrestling promotions [[Wrestling/{{WCW}} that you have bankrupted]] (or the one that's [[Wrestling/{{TNA}} headed that way]]), and fuck Dixie Carter and everybody else that's stupid enough to give this fucking cretin a job in the professional wrestling business. He doesn't like wrestling, he doesn't like wrestling fans; but he likes to suck a living off of something he has no talent for...But nobody seems to get it. And he continues on his oblivious, merry way, running shit into the ground for whoever he works for, and everybody else in the world is '[[GiftedlyBad just nuts]]'.
-->--'''Wrestling/JimCornette''' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onRn_Lq_kew on]] Wrestling/VinceRusso

->Why the {{WWF}} thought he was qualified to be a color commentator is anybody’s guess, but then again, this is the company that put Wrestling/JimRoss out to pasture, while Todd Grisham still reports to the makeup chair every Monday afternoon... Folks, I could go on and on about how Art’s knowledge of the product was less-than-nil. I could belabor how his “[[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Grampa Simpson]]” style of delivery piped up with some bit of nonsense just often enough to [[TheGarfunkel remind you he was there]], while at the same time, chasing all other cohesive thoughts from your mind. I could raise the concern that his repeated inquiries of 'Did dat really hurt ‘im?' [[{{Kayfabe}} didn’t do any favors]] for us on the suspension-of-disbelief front. Or I could just point to the below example that every time the camera showed Art, he just generally looked befuddled as hell.

->Dan Snyder is proof that you can have an approximate IQ of [[PointyHairedBoss one hamster on a wheel]], but as long as you own an {{NFL}} team, the NFL will prop you up no matter how absurdly bad your decision making is. You never hear a good thing about this team in the news. It is just one bad PR disaster after another, to the point where you have to wonder how [[ProfessionalButtKisser team stooge]] Tony Wyllie still has a job. Did you get insulted in a second-rate newspaper? Don't ignore it like a sensible person. Instead, sue them, make a circus out of it, and in fact [[DeathByIrony draw more attention to what was said]]. That's the Wyllie Way! Don't change the name of your absurdly racist team where the misconceived color of a person's skin is in the title. Instead, trot out [[SomeOfMyBestFriendsAreX token Native Americans]] to try and prop yourself up and then have them [[ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules tell you to fuck off]] and take that prop right out from under you. Working for Snyder must be the easiest job in the world. You could be the absolute worst at it and, unless you deliberately and openly torpedo it...Snyder will still overpay you to be there.
-->--'''''Deadspin''''', [[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2014-washington-redskins-1629678313 "Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Washington Redskins"]]

->Y'all remember this guy right? He'd say his name at the beginning of each of his songs? and ''sucked''? He was one of many low-grade {{Music/Usher}} wannabes who came in to replace Music/ChrisBrown. And he definitely the most successful, notching three straight Top 10 hits. And he was by far the worst of them. Let me say this straight-up: I've covered worse songs from far worse people, but there is no one I can think who I respect less as a performer than Music/JasonDerulo. What makes him so bad? I-I don't know how else to say it: The man simply has no talent. Have you ever gotten mad at {{autotune}} that's a lazy cover for people that can't sing? Trust me, you weren't thinking of Music/TPain or {{Music/Kesha}} or Music/LilWayne; you were thinking of Jason Derulo. And even after being autotuned, he ''still'' [[DreadfulMusician had a voice like a squeaky chair]]... Matter of fact, I think you can blame Chris Brown's post-assault resurgence entirely on the fact that we tried to replace him with the only person in the universe that can make ''Chris Brown'' [[WeWantOurJerkBack look charming and charismatic]].
-->--'''WebVideo/ToddInTheShadows''' on "Talk Dirty"

->Look, I know we go on and on about the various celebrities and media outlets who continue to attach themselves to Richardson, but no matter how loudly people scream about what a terrible, shitball of a human being he is, there seems to be no shortage of famous people who are willing to laugh it off and gleefully pose in his terrible photos. What exactly do you think you're getting when you agree to go with this guy, anyway? This shit? I have shot better pictures of my feet accidentally while I was drunk. COME ON.

->Somehow, Square Enix concluded the most suitable recipient of ''FinalFantasyXII''[='s=] executive producer reins was a man who has pretty much been quoted as saying "yeah, I'm aware that the games I've made have [[FinalFantasyII never been]], [[LegendOfMana you know]]...[[{{VideoGame/SaGa}} good]].

->''"The infamous '[[UsefulNotes/WorldWarII Battle of the Bulge]]' in France during winter must have been a particular horror for barely trained eighteen-year-old soldiers. Later, I was shown some of Sibley's letters. The army with its unerring gift for placing people where they would be least useful and most vulnerable had made the nearly blind Sibley a scout. His reported adventures began when his only pair of glasses was broken and the army's difficulty in supplying him with a new pair reduced his utility as a scout in freezing weather... It is my impression that the so-called 'best and brightest' were routinely killed off which might explain [[TallPoppySyndrome the notoriously low level]] of those now in political life and, to be fair, in the arts as well."''

->''"Let's just get this out of the way: As a whole, our society is horrible at getting human beings into the jobs they're most suited for. Look around you -- you'll find yourself under managers who shouldn't even be trusted to manage a stuffed animal tea party, and you'll meet brilliant creative minds who are stuck spinning signs while dressed as Little Caesar."''

->''"You would think there is a higher bar than having a Facebook page to run for president.”''

->''"There was once a time when presidents would win elections and then scour universities and think-tanks for a brain trust; that’s how Henry Kissinger, Samuel Huntington, Zbigniew Brzezinski and others ended up in government service while moving between places like Harvard and Columbia. Those days are gone... the primary requisite of seniority in the policy world is too often an answer to the question: 'What did you [[ProfessionalButtKisser do during the campaign]]?' This is the code of the samurai, not the intellectual, and it privileges the campaign loyalist over the expert."''
-->--'''''The Federalist''''', [[http://thefederalist.com/2014/01/17/the-death-of-expertise/ "The Death of Expertise"]]

->''"Some might say that it's a bit odd that a magazine would make an 'Economics Correspondent' out of someone who [[KnowNothingKnowItAll has no background in economics]], but what those critics fail to take into account is that [=McArdle=] is very tall."''
-->--''RationalWiki'' on pundit Megan [=McArdle=]

->''"I really want to say something nice about this guy but he’s such a jobsworth he makes it difficult. Is it true (correct me if I’m wrong) that when considering a shake up in the series at the beginning of series four that both Kes and Kim were in the running for an axing but they kept Kim because he was in the top 50 of a ‘[[ScrewTheRulesImBeautiful best looking guys on TV]]’ competition? Imagine a show fronted by four women as strong as Janeway, Kes, B’lanna and Seven? Imagine a show ''without'' Harry Kim? Makes you feel warm inside, doesn’t it?"''
-->--'''[[http://www.docohobigfinish.blogspot.com/2012/02/voyager-season-one.html Doc Oho]]''' on ''Series/StarTrekVoyager''

->''"Fuck you on ''my'' behalf, fuck you on the behalf of all the wrestling fans who have to suffer through the effluvia that you put out on the airwaves, fuck you for the professional wrestlers' careers that you have shortened or made less profitable, fuck you for the wrestling promotions [[Wrestling/{{WCW}} that you have bankrupted]] (or the one that's [[Wrestling/{{TNA}} headed that way]]), and fuck Dixie Carter and everybody else that's stupid enough to give this fucking cretin a job in the professional wrestling business. He doesn't like wrestling, he doesn't like wrestling fans; but he likes to suck a living off of something he has no talent for...But nobody seems to get it. And he continues on his oblivious, merry way, running shit into the ground for whoever he works for, and everybody else in the world is '[[GiftedlyBad just nuts]]'."''

->''"Why the {{WWF}} thought he was qualified to be a color commentator is anybody’s guess, but then again, this is the company that put Wrestling/JimRoss out to pasture, while Todd Grisham still reports to the makeup chair every Monday afternoon... Folks, I could go on and on about how Art’s knowledge of the product was less-than-nil. I could belabor how his “[[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Grampa Simpson]]” style of delivery piped up with some bit of nonsense just often enough to [[TheGarfunkel remind you he was there]], while at the same time, chasing all other cohesive thoughts from your mind. I could raise the concern that his repeated inquiries of 'Did dat really hurt ‘im?' [[{{Kayfabe}} didn’t do any favors]] for us on the suspension-of-disbelief front. Or I could just point to the below example that every time the camera showed Art, he just generally looked befuddled as hell."''

->''"Dan Snyder is proof that you can have an approximate IQ of [[PointyHairedBoss one hamster on a wheel]], but as long as you own an {{NFL}} team, the NFL will prop you up no matter how absurdly bad your decision making is. You never hear a good thing about this team in the news. It is just one bad PR disaster after another, to the point where you have to wonder how [[ProfessionalButtKisser team stooge]] Tony Wyllie still has a job. Did you get insulted in a second-rate newspaper? Don't ignore it like a sensible person. Instead, sue them, make a circus out of it, and in fact [[DeathByIrony draw more attention to what was said]]. That's the Wyllie Way! Don't change the name of your absurdly racist team where the misconceived color of a person's skin is in the title. Instead, trot out [[SomeOfMyBestFriendsAreX token Native Americans]] to try and prop yourself up and then have them [[ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules tell you to fuck off]] and take that prop right out from under you. Working for Snyder must be the easiest job in the world. You could be the absolute worst at it and, unless you deliberately and openly torpedo it...Snyder will still overpay you to be there."''
-->--[[http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2014-washington-redskins-1629678313 "Why Your Team Sucks 2014: Washington Redskins"]]

->''"Y'all remember this guy right? He'd say his name at the beginning of each of his songs? and ''sucked''? He was one of many low-grade {{Music/Usher}} wannabes who came in to replace Music/ChrisBrown. And he definitely the most successful, notching three straight Top 10 hits. And he was by far the worst of them. Let me say this straight-up: I've covered worse songs from far worse people, but there is no one I can think who I respect less as a performer than Music/JasonDerulo. What makes him so bad? I-I don't know how else to say it: The man simply has no talent. Have you ever gotten mad at {{autotune}} that's a lazy cover for people that can't sing? Trust me, you weren't thinking of Music/TPain or {{Music/Kesha}} or Music/LilWayne; you were thinking of Jason Derulo. And even after being autotuned, he ''still'' [[DreadfulMusician had a voice like a squeaky chair]]... Matter of fact, I think you can blame Chris Brown's post-assault resurgence entirely on the fact that we tried to replace him with the only person in the universe that can make ''Chris Brown'' [[WeWantOurJerkBack look charming and charismatic]]."''

->''"Somehow, SquareEnix concluded the most suitable recipient of ''FinalFantasyXII''[='s=] executive producer reins was a man who has pretty much been quoted as saying "yeah, I'm aware that the games I've made have [[FinalFantasyII never been]], [[LegendOfMana you know]]...[[{{VideoGame/SaGa}} good]]."''

->''"Look, I know we go on and on about the various celebrities and media outlets who continue to attach themselves to Richardson, but no matter how loudly people scream about what a terrible, shitball of a human being he is, there seems to be no shortage of famous people who are willing to laugh it off and gleefully pose in his terrible photos. What exactly do you think you're getting when you agree to go with this guy, anyway? This shit? I have shot better pictures of my feet accidentally while I was drunk. COME ON."''