History Podcast / TheJohnDredgeNothingToDoWithAnythingShow

* NamesTheSame: A few characters are named after real-life celebrities but bear no further resemblance to their real-life namesakes - the most prominent example probably being Don Durbridge.

The show can best be described as surreal SketchComedy with lots of audiophonic weirdness, similar to Radio/TheGoonShow, [[Creator/KennyEverett Kenny Everett's]] work or Radio/TheBurkissWay. It also features a number of recurring characters and Shows Within a Show, the latter usually appearing once per series.

* CaptainErsatz: Two different sketches parodying Franchise/ScoobyDoo: ''Doggie Doo, What Kind Of Dog Are You?'' and, even more thinly disguised, ''Scooby-Don't''. Then there's ''[[Series/{{Batman}} Gasman & Robert]]''.

--> '''David Lynch''': As usual, Keith Chegwin is with our outside broadcast, you nit. Sorry, that should read, with our outside broadcast unit.

--> '''Listener''' (''calling in''): Yeah, they need to take the A14. That'll take them directly from Omicron 3 to Prestwood Town Centre.

--> '''Phil Oakey''': But don't they have / any synthesisers of their own?\\
'''Secret Service Head''': Their synth pop technology is way behind ours. They've only just mastered the [=LinnDrum=].

--> '''Lift girl''': Eighth circle: Fraudsters, thieves and fundamentalists, hypocrites, astrologers and comedy impressionists. Going down... Ninth circle: Satan, treachery and pants.

--> (''sounds of Gasmobile being powered up'')\\
'''Gasman''': Atomic batteries to Power. Turbines to speed. Ready to move out. Let's go!\\
(''Gasmobile breaks down'')\\
'''Gasman''': On second thoughts, we'll take the bus.\\
'''Robert''': I'll get me Oyster card then.

* CausticCritic: Peter Pilbeam, the show's resident hotel reviewer. Although some of his criticism is rather outlandish, it has to be said…
--> Well the first thing I noticed when I got to the hotel, was the awful stench. This later turned out to be the result of a sandwich that had been left in my pocket for several weeks, but nevertheless it did not bode well.\\

--> '''John''': Why, it's amateur film director and avant-garde weather man, David Lynch. If you don't mind me saying so, David, you look like you've been dragged through a picket fence backwards.\\
'''David Lynch''': That's one of my hobbies, John.\\
'''John''': Well, apart from being dragged through a picket fence backwards, what have you been up to recently?\\
'''David Lynch''': I've been nailing things to other things, John.\\
'''John''': Why?\\
'''David Lynch''': I don't know. I suppose I'm just naturally gifted at that sort of thing.

--> To cap it all, I was very offended at the end of my stay, when I was expected to pay the bill. I found this both awkward and uncomfortable, especially as I had no money. I was then moved to a room that looked almost like a prison cell, which I'll be reviewing next week. And let me warn you: It's not going to be pretty! Thank you!

--> As I was putting on my bicycle clips and getting ready to leave later in the day, I was heartened to see that my overnight work on the carpet in my room had been discovered, as all of the staff had come to show their appreciation by throwing a generous amount of fruit my way, obviously trying to make up for the mistake they'd made at breakfast.

--> '''Greg''': You'd better write me into something soon, or there'll be trouble! T R U I B L S F - trouble!

--> '''Greg''': I don't want to blow my own xylophone…

--> '''Hans Keller''': Before we continue further, I must give a special mention to Radio 3's very own "Smiley Miley", who buried my car in ze sand yesterday as a so called "prank". Needless to say, I immediately contacted ze police und expect ze subsequent court proceedings to result in a custodial sentence. I bet he isn't smiling now.

--> '''Jeff''': A flying saucer, Jeff?\\
'''Jim''': I'm Jim, you're Jeff.\\
'''Jeff''': Sorry, that's the trouble with having two characters with similar names, Jeff.\\
'''Jim''': Jim.
* PaperThinDisguise: Town crier Derek [[Characters/DoctorWhoAliensAndMonsters Dolak]]. Although John is getting a bit suspicious…
-->'''John''': I must say, you rather remind me of someone.\\
'''Derek''': Well, I am well known locally.\\
'''John''': Your telescopic manipulator arm in particular looks familiar.\\
'''Derek''': What? This little thing? (''boing'')\\
'''John''': Yes.\\
'''Derek''': It's just there for show, John! JUST! THERE!! FOR!! SHOW!!! (''exterminates a tree'')

--> Maycausedrowsinessdizzinessdisturbancesintheforceanddeath.

--> '''Policeman''': Right, I'll get down to the nick and we'll be in touch as soon as there are any developments. (''sound of car door'') Exits in police car.

* SmallNameBigEgo: Greg Haiste's character, who feels he's clearly one of the greatest actors around. Unfortunately for him, nobody else shares that view…
--> '''John''' (''reading out a letter''): Dear Dredge, I'm a big fan of the Nothing To Do With Anything Show, but feel that the main supporting actor, Greg Haiste, is somewhat underused. What do you propose to do about it? Yours hopefully, Greg Haiste. Well Greg, we've taken everything you've said on board - and completely dismissed it.

--> '''Magic Grumbling Hedge''': Well, that takes the biscuit, attacking me with that thing. I've had it up to the back teeth with people like you, I really have. I'm going to write to my MP and the Guardian about this and then you'll be sorry.

-->(''various fighting noises and the Batman TV theme tune'')\\
'''Narrator''': Hell! Blam! Thwack! Kvetch! Block! Ftwang! Twerge! Genug! Etcetera!\\
'''The Broker''': Curse you, Gasman! You have overpowered me with your onomatopoeic fighting noises.

** In a later episode, ''The Human League'' has to prevent a race of evil aliens from stealing all the synthesisers in the world:

* BeCarefulWhatYouWishFor: After meeting the [[GenieInABottle Genie of the Magic Truncheon]], PC Rhomboids wishes for there to be no more crime in the village for ever and ever. His wish is granted and everyone lives happily ever after - except for PC Rhomboids himself, who was made redundant.

''The John Dredge Nothing To Do With Anything Show'' is a [[PodCast comedy podcast]] by British comedian Creator/JohnDredge. It gradually evolved out of a number of different approximately five-minutes-long programmes which were originally published on ''Comedy 365'' and are now mostly archived on the ''[[http://404media.blogspot.co.uk/ 404 Funny]]'' podcast ([[http://funny404.libsyn.com/ archives here]]). Many of the shows regular characters first appeared in one of those predecessor programmes.