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Added DiffLines:

* “First Date” is a note-perfect ArenaRock pastiche about finding new love with a beautiful girl... and committing increasingly-heinous crimes together. The first chorus has Danny enthusiastically suggesting, over a soaring .38 Special-esque riff, “Let’s steal a car tonight!” and the evening escalates from there to art theft, murder, and ''mass'' murder. Perhaps predictably, [[DidNotGetTheGirl there’s no second date.]]


** --->'''Student:''' Dr. Sexbang, did any of that really happen?

to:

** --->'''Student:''' Dr. Sexbang, did any of that this really happen?

Added DiffLines:

** --->'''Student:''' Dr. Sexbang, did any of that really happen?
--->'''Danny:''' *pauses, then nods* [[BluntYes Yeah.]]


** During the concert sequence for "Danny Don't You Know", Danny brags that he has a centaur, played by LetsPlay/{{Markiplier}}. A woman asks "Where'd he get that centaur!?", to which Mark looks over as if to judge [[WorldOfWeirdness why she's even asking]].

to:

** During the concert sequence for "Danny Don't You Know", sequence, Danny brags that he has a centaur, played by LetsPlay/{{Markiplier}}. A woman asks "Where'd he get that a centaur!?", to which Mark looks over as if to judge [[WorldOfWeirdness why she's even asking]].


* The title track, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tW0G9XWaj0 ''Cool Patrol'']], features Dan and Company trying to help a high school student (played by [[LetsPlay/JackSepticEye JackSepticEye]]) stand up to bullies. Their "help" consists of teaching him a highly convoluted instructional dance with steps like "rub that peanut butter on you", "slap a camel", and "grab a bird from the sky and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick eat it whole]]". After the Cool Patrol finishes teaching Jack, he goes to confront the bullies and gets [[OneHitKill KO'd with one punch]].

to:

* The title track, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tW0G9XWaj0 ''Cool Patrol'']], features Dan and Company trying to help a high school student (played by [[LetsPlay/JackSepticEye JackSepticEye]]) LetsPlay/JackSepticEye) stand up to bullies. Their "help" consists of teaching him a highly convoluted instructional dance with steps like "rub that peanut butter on you", "slap a camel", and "grab a bird from the sky and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick eat it whole]]". After the Cool Patrol finishes teaching Jack, he goes to confront the bullies and gets [[OneHitKill KO'd with one punch]].



** During the concert sequence for "Danny Don't You Know", Danny brags that he has a centaur, played by [[https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/LetsPlay/Markiplier Markiplier]]. A woman asks "Where'd he get that centaur!?", to which Mark looks over as if to judge [[WorldOfWeirdness why she's even asking]].

to:

** During the concert sequence for "Danny Don't You Know", Danny brags that he has a centaur, played by [[https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/LetsPlay/Markiplier Markiplier]].LetsPlay/{{Markiplier}}. A woman asks "Where'd he get that centaur!?", to which Mark looks over as if to judge [[WorldOfWeirdness why she's even asking]].


*** [[DontExplainTheJoke It's Brian! Brian has an STD-]] (''song abruptly stops'') [--I'm sorry!--]

to:

*** [[DontExplainTheJoke It's Brian! Brian has an STD-]] STD]]--! (''song abruptly stops'') [--I'm sorry!--]

Added DiffLines:

** The intro of the song, where Danny sings about how him and his date are both very busy people. She has her career, and Danny... shoots an awkward look to a pile of costumes and burgers labelled "Danny's Business Stuff", and then says that he "does 'stuff'."


--->'''Danny:''' BACK WHEN SATAN RULED THE LA--
''(Brian goes back to playing his bloopy jam)''

to:

--->'''Danny:''' BACK WHEN SATAN RULED THE LA--
LA--\\
''(Brian goes back to playing his bloopy jam)''jam)''\\



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgSwD4j8v1c Party of Three]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgSwD4j8v1c Party of Three]]Three]]"



** 'Eat a Dick: A Collection of Romantic Poetry'

to:

** 'Eat "Eat a Dick: A Collection of Romantic Poetry'Poetry"



-->'''DJ''': [[AWildRapperAppears Yo, I'm the DJ! Who wants to dan-]]
-->*is shot by Ninja Brian*

to:

-->'''DJ''': --->'''DJ:''' [[AWildRapperAppears Yo, I'm the DJ! Who wants to dan-]]
-->*is
dan]]--?
''(is
shot by Ninja Brian*Brian)''



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5abgDBQHPk Dragon Slayer]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a5abgDBQHPk Dragon Slayer]]Slayer]]"



** The object of Danny's affection ends up choosing [[SleepsWithEveryoneButYou all the other guys but him]]. Also the dragon, Ninja Brian, and [[spoiler: [[CallBack the manticore]]]].
--> '''Danny:''' "Oh. I see you've chosen the football player...''*Sighs*'' And the scientist...aaaand apparently the weightlifter as well...and the dragon...and Ninja Brian...and--[[spoiler: the manticore!?]] ''He wasn't even in this song!''

to:

** The object of Danny's affection ends up choosing [[SleepsWithEveryoneButYou all the other guys but him]]. Also the dragon, Ninja Brian, and [[spoiler: [[CallBack [[[CallBack the manticore]]]].
--> '''Danny:''' "Oh.
manticore]].
--->'''Danny:''' Oh.
I see you've chosen the football player...''*Sighs*'' ''(sighs)'' And the scientist...aaaand apparently the weightlifter as well...and And the dragon...and dragon... And Ninja Brian...and--[[spoiler: the manticore!?]] Brian ...And-- The manticore!? ''He wasn't even in this song!''



-->'''Danny:''' Ninja Brian, would you lay down a sick flute solo for me?
-->''Brian shakes his head''
-->'''Danny:''' Thank you.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Ninja Brian, would you lay down a sick flute solo for me?
-->''Brian
me?\\
''(Brian
shakes his head''
-->'''Danny:'''
head)''\\
'''Danny:'''
Thank you.



-->'''Danny:''' Sorry, I don't know why we said 'fuck' there.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Sorry, I don't know why we said 'fuck' "fuck" there.



-->'''Danny:''' Sorry again?
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lA__rwBKzSw Why I Cry]]

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Sorry again?
* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lA__rwBKzSw Why I Cry]]Cry]]"



--> '''Danny''': Uhh, N... O... C-''[buzzer]'' Fuck it!

to:

--> '''Danny''': ---> '''Danny:''' Uhh, N... O... C-''[buzzer]'' C--''[buzzer]'' Fuck it!



--> '''Danny''': Phew, here we go... N... R-''[buzzer]'' This is literally fucking impossible!

to:

--> '''Danny''': ---> '''Danny:''' Phew, here we go... N... R-''[buzzer]'' This is literally fucking impossible!



--->'''Satchel''': So...what you're saying is you guys had sex all over the world, [[DidYouDie and then you died in space]].
--->'''Danny Sexbang''': That is correct.

to:

--->'''Satchel''': --->'''Satchel:''' So...what you're saying is you guys had sex all over the world, [[DidYouDie and then you died in space]].
--->'''Danny Sexbang''':
space]].\\
'''Danny:'''
That is correct.



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uriJOsWy_zU Cookies!]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uriJOsWy_zU Cookies!]]Cookies!]]"



* ''Dubstep''

to:

* ''Dubstep''"Dubstep"



---> *''Piano smashing sound''*
--->'''Danny:''' Eat dicks, Brian, this is romantic as ''fuck''! Do ''not'' throw that piano at me again!

to:

---> *''Piano -->''(piano smashing sound''*
--->'''Danny:'''
sound)''\\
'''Danny:'''
Eat dicks, Brian, this is romantic as ''fuck''! Do ''not'' throw that piano at me again!



--->'''Danny:''' WHY DOES HE HAVE GRENADES?!

to:

--->'''Danny:''' -->'''Danny:''' WHY DOES HE HAVE GRENADES?!



--->'''Danny:''' [[SuddenlyShouting HEY, DO YOU LIKE PIZZA?!]]

to:

--->'''Danny:''' -->'''Danny:''' [[SuddenlyShouting HEY, DO YOU LIKE PIZZA?!]]



--->'''Danny:''' MORE PIZZA, BRIAN! With funions and ham too!
--->'''Danny:''' [[UpToEleven Now coat me in pizza and throw me, goddamn you!]]

to:

--->'''Danny:''' MORE PIZZA, BRIAN! With funions and ham too!
--->'''Danny:'''
too!\\
'''Danny:'''
[[UpToEleven Now coat me in pizza and throw me, goddamn you!]]



--->'''Danny:''' [[WhatAnIdiot Hang on, I'm going to hop over there and tell her I love her.]]
--->'''*sickening crunching sound*'''
--->'''Danny:''' AAAAUGH!

to:

--->'''Danny:''' ---->'''Danny:''' [[WhatAnIdiot Hang on, I'm going to hop over there and tell her I love her.]]
--->'''*sickening
]]\\
'''(sickening
crunching sound*'''
--->'''Danny:'''
sound)'''\\
'''Danny:'''
AAAAUGH!




* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDK9FIQd3lg&list=RDYDK9FIQd3lg The Sacred Chalice]], a four-part series detailing Danny and Brian's adventure searching for the titular chalice.
** Part 1

to:

\n* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDK9FIQd3lg&list=RDYDK9FIQd3lg The Sacred Chalice]], Chalice]]", a four-part series detailing Danny and Brian's adventure searching for the titular chalice.
** Part 11:



---> '''Kristen:''' Your place looks a lot bigger from outside.
---> '''Danny:'''' Oh yeah, you know...angles.

to:

---> '''Kristen:''' ---->'''Kristen:''' [[BiggerOnTheInside Your place looks a lot bigger bigger]] [[InvertedTrope from outside.
--->
outside]].\\
'''Danny:'''' Oh Oh, yeah, you know...angles.



---> '''Kristen:''' What is that?
---> '''Danny:''' Oh, this old thing? [[UnusuallyUninterestingSight I'm surprised you noticed]].

to:

---> '''Kristen:''' ---->'''Kristen:''' What is that?
--->
that?\\
'''Danny:''' Oh, this old thing? [[UnusuallyUninterestingSight I'm surprised you noticed]].



---> '''Danny:''' Uh, actually there wasn't a hooker, I, uh, just remembered...*singing* that was another robot.
---> ''Kristen nods, genuinely convinced''

to:

---> '''Danny:''' ---->'''Danny:''' Uh, actually there wasn't a hooker, I, uh, just remembered...*singing* remembered... ''(singing)'' that was another robot.
---> ''Kristen
robot.\\
''(Kristen
nods, genuinely convinced''convinced)''



** Part 2

to:

** Part 22:



---> '''Announcer:''' In the last episode of ''The Sacred Chalice: A Quest: [[ColonCancer Part 1]]...
---> '''Danny:''' This is the Sacred Chalice of Ragaloh.
---> '''Announcer:''' And now part 2.

to:

---> '''Announcer:''' ---->'''Announcer:''' In the last episode of ''The Sacred Chalice: A Quest: [[ColonCancer Part 1]]...
--->
1]]...\\
'''Danny:''' This is the Sacred Chalice of Ragaloh.
--->
Ragaloh.\\
'''Announcer:''' And now part 2.



---> '''Bridge Keeper:''' [[SeriousBusiness And you must eat the crusts too.]]
---> '''Danny:''' [[ComicalOverreacting NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]

to:

---> '''Bridge --->'''Bridge Keeper:''' [[SeriousBusiness And you must eat the crusts too.]]
--->
]]\\
'''Danny:''' [[ComicalOverreacting NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]



--->'''Danny:''' ''Because we must follow the guiding light/ of the North Star/ even though it screwed us over a bunch of times/ What's your problem?/ Go fuck yourself, star!''
** Part 3

to:

--->'''Danny:''' ''Because ---->'''Danny:''' ♪''Because we must follow the guiding light/ of the North Star/ even though it screwed us over a bunch of times/ What's your problem?/ Go fuck yourself, star!''
star!''♪
** Part 33:



---> '''Announcer:''' *now in a thick cockney accent* In the last episode of ''The Sacred Chalice: A Quest: [[ColonCancer Part 3]]...
---> '''Danny:''' [[BigNo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]
---> *Shot of the robot spazzing out*
---> '''Danny:''' [[RepeatCut NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]

to:

---> '''Announcer:''' *now ---->'''Announcer:''' ''(now in a thick cockney accent* accent)'' In the last episode of ''The Sacred Chalice: A Quest: [[ColonCancer Part 3]]...
--->
3]]...\\
'''Danny:''' [[BigNo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]
---> *Shot
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]\\
''(shot
of the robot spazzing out*
--->
out)''\\
'''Danny:''' [[RepeatCut NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]



---> ''Puppies and kitties\\

to:

---> ''Puppies ---->''Puppies and kitties\\



---> '''Danny''': [[SarcasmMode Nice Haiku, Ninja Brian.]] That middle line had eight syllables. Dick.

to:

---> '''Danny''': ---->'''Danny:''' [[SarcasmMode Nice Haiku, Ninja Brian.]] That middle line had eight syllables. Dick.



---> '''Danny:''' Plan B!
---> ''They run.''
---> '''Park Ranger:''' Where the fuck they go?

to:

---> '''Danny:''' ---->'''Danny:''' Plan B!
---> ''They run.''
--->
B!\\
''(they run)''\\
'''Park Ranger:''' Where the fuck they go?





* The Introduction. Danny's riding a magnificent black stallion - who is actually Ninja Brian - across a beach.
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgPpgxVpj6g The NSP Theme Song]].

to:

* The Introduction. Danny's riding a magnificent black stallion - who is actually Ninja Brian - -- across a beach.
* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgPpgxVpj6g The NSP Theme Song]].Song]]"



-->'''Danny:''' I didn't mean to call you fat. [[JerkWithAHeartOfJerk I meant stupid. And ugly. And fat.]]
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUvH7cGiNl8 The Decision]]

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' I didn't mean to call you fat. [[JerkWithAHeartOfJerk I meant stupid. And ugly. And fat.]]
* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUvH7cGiNl8 The Decision]]Decision]]"



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f99njZJod2c If We Were Gay]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f99njZJod2c If We Were Gay]]Gay]]"



-->'''Danny:''' Here's a list of things that Brian likes to suck: [[OverlyLongGag dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick]] [[BaitAndSwitch BALLS]]!

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Here's a list of things that Brian likes to suck: [[OverlyLongGag dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick dick]] [[BaitAndSwitch BALLS]]!



-->'''Danny:''' Unnecessary second poison dart.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' ---->'''Danny:''' Unnecessary second poison dart.



-->'''Danny:''' ''[[spoiler:(after getting back up)]]'' DON'T applaud that!

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' ''[[spoiler:(after getting back up)]]'' DON'T applaud that!



-->'''Danny:''' I like coleslaw but not that much.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' I like coleslaw but not that much.



-->'''Danny:''' I have to go. [[IHaveToIronMyDog I have a...uh...doctor's appointment at the dentist]].

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' I have to go. [[IHaveToIronMyDog I have a...uh...doctor's appointment at the dentist]].



--> '''Zookeeper''': Hi! Welcome to the zoo!
--> '''Danny''': Great! I love the zoo! Look at all those monkeys!
--> '''Zookeeper''': Actually, those technically aren't monkeys, they're macaques!
--> '''Danny''': Wow! [[IncrediblyLamePun Macaque's really hairy]]!
--> *The zookeeper looks unimpressed*
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMv0DNT45MI Puppies In Space]]

to:

--> '''Zookeeper''': --->'''Zookeeper:''' Hi! Welcome to the zoo!
--> '''Danny''':
zoo!\\
'''Danny:'''
Great! I love the zoo! Look at all those monkeys!
--> '''Zookeeper''':
monkeys!\\
'''Zookeeper:'''
Actually, those technically aren't monkeys, they're macaques!
--> '''Danny''':
macaques!\\
'''Danny:'''
Wow! [[IncrediblyLamePun Macaque's really hairy]]!
--> *The
hairy]]!\\
''(the
zookeeper looks unimpressed*
unimpressed)''
* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMv0DNT45MI Puppies In Space]]Space]]"



--> '''Danny:''' We'll wait out here with your girlfriend. Unrelated question, where do you keep all your lube?

to:

--> '''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' We'll wait out here with your girlfriend. Unrelated question, where do you keep all your lube?



--> '''Danny:''' It's not like there wasn't already enough on my mind...like the manticore.

to:

--> '''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' It's not like there wasn't already enough on my mind...like the manticore.



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzIwn5jvQyU You Can Do Us]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzIwn5jvQyU You Can Do Us]]Us]]"



* Accept My Shaft

to:

* Accept "Accept My ShaftShaft"



* Outro

to:

* Outro"Outro"



--> '''Danny:''' Ninja Brian, you did a pretty okay job too. I'm particularly impressed by how you're simultaneously playing piano, pan flute, maracas and a gong next to me right now. It almost makes me regret calling you fat, stupid, ugly, and saying that you have an STD throughout the course of this album. Even though all those things are true.
--> ''The music stops.''
--> '''Danny:''' ...I mean, not true.
--> ''Music starts again.''

to:

--> '''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Ninja Brian, you did a pretty okay job too. I'm particularly impressed by how you're simultaneously playing piano, pan flute, maracas and a gong next to me right now. It almost makes me regret calling you fat, stupid, ugly, and saying that you have an STD throughout the course of this album. Even though all those things are true.
--> ''The ''(the music stops.''
-->
stops)''
'''Danny:''' ...I mean, not true.
--> ''Music ''(music starts again.''again)''



* Intro (Strawberries)
--> '''Danny:''' 'Won't you hold on a moment while I stop having sex.'
--> *cymbal hit*
--> '''Danny:''' Cool. Thanks
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uCft0PaGIM Best Friends Forever!]]

to:

* Intro (Strawberries)
--> '''Danny:''' 'Won't
"Intro (Strawberries)"
-->'''Danny:''' Won't
you hold on a moment while I stop having sex.'
--> *cymbal hit*
-->
\\
''(cymbal hit)''\\
'''Danny:''' Cool. Thanks
* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uCft0PaGIM Best Friends Forever!]]Forever!]]"



-->'''Danny:''' Really, Ninja Brian? During the chorus? *scoff* [[EasilyForgiven I can't stay mad at you]].

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Really, Ninja Brian? During the chorus? *scoff* [[EasilyForgiven I can't stay mad at you]].



-->'''Danny:''' Is that a knife? Oh, it's a knife. I can tell by the way it's stabbing me. *sigh* Good talk, buddy.
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gbra-rKXzk4 Unicorn Wizard]]

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Is that a knife? Oh, it's a knife. I can tell by the way it's stabbing me. *sigh* Good talk, buddy.
* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gbra-rKXzk4 Unicorn Wizard]]Wizard]]"



** '...and that thermos of soup!...I'm hungry, but also thirsty, and you can kind of eat and drink soup at the same ti-LET'S GO!'

to:

** '..."...and that thermos of soup!...soup! ...I'm hungry, but also thirsty, and you can kind of eat and drink soup at the same ti-LET'S GO!'ti--LET'S GO!"



-->'''Danny's Mom:''' Danny! Danny, wake up!
-->'''Danny:''' Oh! Hey mom! I had the craziest dream! I was the unicorn wizard!
-->'''Danny's Mom:''' Aww...shut up.
-->'''Danny:''' Uuuuunicorn wizard....
-->'''Danny's Mom:''' I said shut up.
-->'''Danny:''' YOU shut up!

to:

-->'''Danny's --->'''Danny's Mom:''' Danny! Danny, wake up!
-->'''Danny:'''
up!\\
'''Danny:'''
Oh! Hey mom! I had the craziest dream! I was the unicorn wizard!
-->'''Danny's
wizard!\\
'''Danny's
Mom:''' Aww...shut up.
-->'''Danny:'''
Aww... ''shut up''.\\
'''Danny:'''
Uuuuunicorn wizard....
-->'''Danny's
wizard...\\
'''Danny's
Mom:''' I said shut up.
-->'''Danny:'''
up.\\
'''Danny:'''
YOU shut up!



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjs3flF-vQk Let's Get This Terrible Party Started!]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjs3flF-vQk Let's Get This Terrible Party Started!]]Started!]]"



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsICgp7SAcI Next To You]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsICgp7SAcI Next To You]]You]]"



-->'''Danny:''' You should know that I'm not doing this for myself. It's partly for you. But most of all, I'm doing this [[PatrioticFervor for America]].

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' You should know that I'm not doing this for myself. It's partly for you. But most of all, I'm doing this [[PatrioticFervor for America]].



-->'''Danny:''' You're welcome for Ninja Sex Party video. Did that one have enough jacking off for you? *laughs* Me neither.
** Danny then admonishes Ninja Brian's stealthiness as he poorly hides behind a pot plant...[[spoiler: while the real Ninja Brian comes in from the side and chokes him to death]].

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' You're welcome for Ninja Sex Party video. Did that one have enough jacking off for you? *laughs* ''(laughs)'' Me neither.
** Danny then admonishes Ninja Brian's stealthiness as he poorly hides behind a pot plant...[[spoiler: while [[spoiler:while the real Ninja Brian comes in from the side and chokes him to death]].



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDK9FIQd3lg The Sacred Chalice, Pt 1.]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDK9FIQd3lg The Sacred Chalice, Pt 1.]]]]"



* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEl96I_4PuI Everybody Shut Up (I Have An Erection)]]

to:

* [[https://www."[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEl96I_4PuI Everybody Shut Up (I Have An Erection)]]Erection)]]"



-->'''Danny:''' If it makes you feel better, I'm a fucking rock star...WITH AN AMAZING PENIS! (rainbows fire from his dick area) [[ItsAllAboutMe But enough about you, let's focus more on my crotch...]]

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' If it makes you feel better, I'm a fucking rock star...WITH AN AMAZING PENIS! (rainbows fire from his dick area) [[ItsAllAboutMe But enough about you, let's focus more on my crotch...]]



-->'''P'''enis
-->'''T'''ouching
-->'''A'''ssociation

-->'''D'''icking (oh so)
-->'''V'''ery
-->'''D'''elicately

-->'''S'''uch
-->'''A'''mazing
-->'''T'''hrusting
-->(that you'll)
-->'''G'''et
-->'''R'''eady (for)
-->'''E'''cstasy

-->'''R'''eally
-->'''P'''ound (your)
-->'''G'''roin
-->(while you)
-->'''A'''chieve
-->'''B'''utt
-->'''C'''limax
-->(and)
-->'''M'''ake
-->'''S'''ex
-->'''G'''ravy

-->'''V'''ery
-->'''I'''ntensely
-->'''P'''ounded
-->(by)
-->'''D'''ick
-->'''M'''ade (out of)
-->'''V'''ictory

to:

-->'''P'''enis
-->'''T'''ouching
-->'''A'''ssociation

-->'''D'''icking
--->'''P'''enis\\
'''T'''ouching\\
'''A'''ssociation\\\
'''D'''icking
(oh so)
-->'''V'''ery
-->'''D'''elicately

-->'''S'''uch
-->'''A'''mazing
-->'''T'''hrusting
-->(that you'll)
-->'''G'''et
-->'''R'''eady (for)
-->'''E'''cstasy

-->'''R'''eally
-->'''P'''ound (your)
-->'''G'''roin
-->(while you)
-->'''A'''chieve
-->'''B'''utt
-->'''C'''limax
-->(and)
-->'''M'''ake
-->'''S'''ex
-->'''G'''ravy

-->'''V'''ery
-->'''I'''ntensely
-->'''P'''ounded
-->(by)
-->'''D'''ick
-->'''M'''ade
so)\\
'''V'''ery\\
'''D'''elicately\\\
'''S'''uch\\
'''A'''mazing\\
'''T'''hrusting\\
(that you'll)\\
'''G'''et\\
'''R'''eady (for)\\
'''E'''cstasy\\\
'''R'''eally\\
'''P'''ound (your)\\
'''G'''roin\\
(while you)\\
'''A'''chieve\\
'''B'''utt\\
'''C'''limax\\
(and)\\
'''M'''ake\\
'''S'''ex\\
'''G'''ravy\\\
'''V'''ery\\
'''I'''ntensely\\
'''P'''ounded\\
(by)\\
'''D'''ick\\
'''M'''ade
(out of)
-->'''V'''ictory
of)\\
'''V'''ictory



-->'''Danny:''' If you want me to F your A say 'yeah'!
-->*silence*
-->'''Danny:''' ...oh.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' If you want me to F your A say 'yeah'!
-->*silence*
-->'''Danny:''' ...oh.
"yeah"!\\
''(silence)''\\
'''Danny:''' ...Oh.



* Shredded Metal

to:

* Shredded Metal"Shredded Metal"



-->'''Danny:''' That's just the underwater effect on the same song. Come on, man.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' That's just the underwater effect on the same song. Come on, man.



-->'''Danny:''' BACK WHEN SATAN RULED THE LA-
-->*Brian goes back to playing his bloopy jam*
-->'''Danny:''' GODDAMNIT!

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' BACK WHEN SATAN RULED THE LA-
-->*Brian
LA--
''(Brian
goes back to playing his bloopy jam*
-->'''Danny:'''
jam)''
'''Danny:'''
GODDAMNIT!



-->'''Danny:''' ...and you've got a sandwich that I'd like to fuck!
-->*Ninja Brian and your mom looks horrified*
-->'''Danny:''' ...I mean, eat.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' ...and --->'''Danny:''' ...And you've got a sandwich that I'd like to fuck!
-->*Ninja
fuck!\\
''(Ninja
Brian and your mom looks horrified*
-->'''Danny:''' ...
horrified)''\\
'''Danny:''' ...
I mean, eat.



-->'''Danny:''' Oh... but... not the one you're eating right now, Brian... Alright, I fucked that muffin too! You gunna judge me? You gunna be a Judgy Jason about this?
-->''Ninja Brian cleaves Danny in two with a katana.''
-->'''Danny:''' [[MajorInjuryUnderreaction ....You have cleaved my entire body in half.]]

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Oh... but... not the one you're eating right now, Brian... Alright, I fucked that muffin too! You gunna judge me? You gunna be a Judgy Jason about this?
-->''Ninja
this?\\
''(Ninja
Brian cleaves Danny in two with a katana.''
-->'''Danny:''' [[MajorInjuryUnderreaction ....
katana)''\\
'''Danny:''' [[MajorInjuryUnderreaction ...
You have cleaved my entire body in half.]]



* Outro

to:

* Outro"Outro"



-->'''Danny:''' Hold on a moment while I start having sex again.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Hold on a moment while I start having sex again.



-->'''Danny:''' Well, I am off to change my name and address. Just as soon as I stop having sex. *beat* There we go. *beat* Wait, no, I started again.

to:

-->'''Danny:''' --->'''Danny:''' Well, I am off to change my name and address. Just as soon as I stop having sex. *beat* ''(beat)'' There we go. *beat* ''(beat)'' Wait, no, I started again.


* The title track, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tW0G9XWaj0 ''Cool Patrol'']], features Dan and Company trying to help a high school student (played by [[LetsPlay/JackSepticEye JackSepticEye]]) stand up to bullies. Their "help" consists of teaching him a highly convoluted instructional dance with steps like "rub that peanut butter on you", "slap a camel", and "grab a bird from the sky and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick eat it whole]]". After the Cool Patrol finishes teaching Jack, he goes to confront the bullies [[spoiler: and gets [[OneHitKill KO'd with one punch.]]]]

to:

* The title track, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tW0G9XWaj0 ''Cool Patrol'']], features Dan and Company trying to help a high school student (played by [[LetsPlay/JackSepticEye JackSepticEye]]) stand up to bullies. Their "help" consists of teaching him a highly convoluted instructional dance with steps like "rub that peanut butter on you", "slap a camel", and "grab a bird from the sky and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick eat it whole]]". After the Cool Patrol finishes teaching Jack, he goes to confront the bullies [[spoiler: and gets [[OneHitKill KO'd with one punch.]]]]punch]].
-->'''Danny:''' Your training is complete! Now, go show the fuckers who's boss!\\
'''Jack:''' Okay! ''(confidently strides towards the bullies)'' Hey, guys! Listen up! "You put your hands in"--\\
''(PUNCH!)''\\
'''Danny:''' ''(flinches)'' OH, GOD! He might... He might actually be dead.\\
''(Ninja Brian nods)''



-->'''Crowd:''' D! A! N-N-Y! He's a super awesome guy! D! A! N-N-Y! He is not afraid to cry!
-->'''Danny:''' [[FlatWhat What?]]
-->'''Crowd:''' D! A! N-N-Y! He cries almost all the time!
-->'''Danny:''' Uh...
-->'''Crowd:''' D! A! N-N-Y! He cries and cries and cries and cries!
-->[Cut to Ninja Brian, [[WithFriendsLikeThese who is holding up cue cards]]]
-->'''Danny:''' OK, thanks guys. [[SarcasmMode Very helpful]]. Thank you. OK, shake it off, shake it off...

to:

-->'''Crowd:''' D! A! N-N-Y! He's a super awesome guy! D! A! N-N-Y! He is not afraid to cry!
-->'''Danny:'''
cry!\\
'''Danny:'''
[[FlatWhat What?]]
-->'''Crowd:'''
What?]]\\
'''Crowd:'''
D! A! N-N-Y! He cries almost all the time!
-->'''Danny:''' Uh...
-->'''Crowd:'''
time!\\
'''Danny:''' Uh...\\
'''Crowd:'''
D! A! N-N-Y! He cries and cries and cries and cries!
-->[Cut
cries!\\
''[cut
to Ninja Brian, [[WithFriendsLikeThese who is holding up cue cards]]]
-->'''Danny:'''
cards]]]''\\
'''Danny:'''
OK, thanks guys. [[SarcasmMode Very helpful]]. Thank you. OK, shake it off, shake it off...

Added DiffLines:

*** After claiming to have "cured all diseases last week" it shows Barry taking a swig from the "cure" and looking immediately better. [[RunningGag Brian snaps his neck anyway.]]


** In the live version the bloopy reggae jams turn into a parody of [[Music/BobMarley Bob Marley's "One Love" about buttsex.

to:

** In the live version the bloopy reggae jams turn into a parody of [[Music/BobMarley Bob Marley's Marley's]] "One Love" about buttsex.


** In the live version the bloopy reggae jams turn into a parody of Bob Marley's "One Love" about buttsex.

to:

** In the live version the bloopy reggae jams turn into a parody of [[Music/BobMarley Bob Marley's "One Love" about buttsex.

Added DiffLines:

** In the live version the bloopy reggae jams turn into a parody of Bob Marley's "One Love" about buttsex.

Added DiffLines:

--->'''Danny:''' WHY DOES HE HAVE GRENADES?!

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