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--> '''Jennifer''': Hey. [[ShoeSlap I can throw my shoe]] at them if you like.

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* The Mercs [[AddressingThePlayer chiding you]] when you ''insist'' in firing their weapon when its out of ammo:
--> '''Mattias''': What am I supposed to use...[[HarshWordImpact harsh language?]]


* The mission to recover a deadly, amazing weapons system for the UP mercenaries known as "The Devastator." You drive to the location, and there's this big, scary tank there... that isn't the objective. [[spoiler: It's actually a little pink moped with a flower basket and silver skulls on the front, which is ''behind'' the tank. You then have to drive it through a crowded city, and the UP mercenaries will make fun of you when you get it to them]].

to:

* The mission to recover a deadly, amazing weapons system for the UP mercenaries known as "The Devastator." You drive to the location, and there's this big, scary tank there... that isn't the objective. objective and you can't use it. [[spoiler: It's "The Devastator" is actually a little pink moped with a flower basket and silver skulls on the front, which is ''behind'' the tank. You then have to drive it through a crowded city, and the UP mercenaries will make fun of you when you get it to them]].them. It's just them hazing the Mercenary before letting them see their boss]].

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* Mattias' confusion about babysitting returns. Made ever better by his tone of voice making him sound ''genuinely concerned that people do this.''
--> ...why would someone sit on a baby?


* [[PressXToNotDie Mattias can hijack tanks and vehicles quickly and with little fuss.]] ''[[GenreSavvy He knows this]].''

to:

* [[PressXToNotDie Mattias can hijack tanks and vehicles quickly and with little fuss.]] ''[[GenreSavvy He ''He knows this]].this.''

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* Mattias finding a Stinger when faced with incoming hostile helicopters.
--> I haven't been this happy since I was nine, and got my first box of Ettans [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snus snus!]]


* The mission to recover a deadly, amazing weapons system for the UP mercenaries known as "The Devastator." [[spoiler: It's actually a little pink moped with a flower basket and silver skulls on the front.]]

to:

* The mission to recover a deadly, amazing weapons system for the UP mercenaries known as "The Devastator." You drive to the location, and there's this big, scary tank there... that isn't the objective. [[spoiler: It's actually a little pink moped with a flower basket and silver skulls on the front.]]front, which is ''behind'' the tank. You then have to drive it through a crowded city, and the UP mercenaries will make fun of you when you get it to them]].


* The cutscene with all three mercs together is pretty funny as well: it's funny enough when Chris (or Mattias if Chris is selected) exclaims the selected merc can't sit down because they got ShotInTheAss. But select Jennifer, and she basically mutters [[AllMenArePerverts how it just figures]] [[MaleGaze he was staring at HER ass.]]

to:

* The cutscene with all three mercs together is pretty funny as well: it's funny enough when Chris (or Mattias Jennifer if Chris is selected) exclaims the selected merc can't sit down because they got ShotInTheAss. But select Jennifer, and she basically mutters each merc has a unique line when snarking back:
--> '''Fiona:''' "(Player Merc), sit down."
--> '''Chris/Jennifer:''' "They can't. They got shot in the ass!"
--> '''Mattias:''' "'''[[InsistentTerminology Upper thigh]].'''"
--> '''Chris:''' "[[FemaleGaze You checkin' out my ass?]]
[[AllMenArePerverts how it just figures]] There's hope for you yet...]]"
--> '''Jennifer:''' "''[[AllMenArePerverts Trust you to be]]
[[MaleGaze he was staring looking at HER my ass.]]]]''"

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* Putting Mattias in the Chicken outfit and... well, doing anything, really.

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** And just as a potential player-created BrickJoke, [[spoiler: you can choose to bomb the hell out of UP H.Q. in a Chinese mission]]. One can pretend it was for progressing in the story, but it [[DisproportionateRetribution comes across as comical revenge]].

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** Really, pretty much everything that comes out of Misha's mouth is one of these.


-->I've been shot! I'm dying! Not...bleeding, though...[[BreakingTheFourthWall stupid T rating....]]

to:

-->I've been shot! I'm dying! [[BloodlessCarnage Not...bleeding, though...[[BreakingTheFourthWall ]][[BreakingTheFourthWall stupid T rating....]]

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* In one mission, you have to escort a UP executive while he's burning documents. If he gets killed, his has this wonderful line:
-->I've been shot! I'm dying! Not...bleeding, though...[[BreakingTheFourthWall stupid T rating....]]

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* The mission to recover a deadly, amazing weapons system for the UP mercenaries known as "The Devastator." [[spoiler: It's actually a little pink moped with a flower basket and silver skulls on the front.]]


-->'''Mattias'''[[hottip:*:(in much the same tone of voice a small boy would talk about a particularly exciting Christmas present)]]: They sent me a ''tank?!''
-->'''Mattias'''[[hottip:*:(when driving a flaming vehicle that [[EveryCarIsAPinto is about to blow up from under him)]]: Time to bail out, and steal another one.

to:

-->'''Mattias'''[[hottip:*:(in -->'''Mattias'''[[note]](in much the same tone of voice a small boy would talk about a particularly exciting Christmas present)]]: present)[[/note]]: They sent me a ''tank?!''
-->'''Mattias'''[[hottip:*:(when -->'''Mattias'''[[note]](when driving a flaming vehicle that [[EveryCarIsAPinto is about to blow up from under him)]]: him)]][[/note]]: Time to bail out, and steal another one.

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