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** His and Lazar Wolf's conversation in the bar. Lazar Wolf is talking about his plans to marry Tevye's daughter. Tevye thinks he's talking about buying some cows. HilarityEnsues.

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** His and Lazar Wolf's [[OneDialogueTwoConversations conversation in the bar.bar]]. Lazar Wolf is talking about his plans to marry Tevye's daughter. Tevye thinks he's talking about buying some cows. HilarityEnsues.


* Tzeitel's imitation of Yenta during the song "Matchmaker".

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* Tzeitel's imitation of Yenta during the song "Matchmaker"."Matchmaker"
** Even funnier in the film when Hodel joins Tzeitel to tease Chava, and Chava glances back and forth between each of her older sisters, looking thoroughly unimpressed by their dire predictions,

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** When Tevye subsequently approaches Golde for a dance, she scoffs and turns away from him. He insists by shouting her name and clapping his hands before pulling her onto the dance floor. We then see Motel attempt to dance with Tzeitel by shouting and clapping his hands in an exact imitation of Tevye, but the nebbishe Motel is far less intimidating than the burly Tevye. (However, it still works!)


** "'''[[EarWorm TRADITIOOOOOOON]]'''"


--->'''Tevye:''' I'm sorry. As Jacob said, "I am slow of speech and slow of tongue."'

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--->'''Tevye:''' I'm sorry. As Jacob King David said, "I am slow of speech and slow of tongue."'



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* In the Yiddish production, at the end of ''"Der Kholem"'' ("The Dream"), Golde goes ''"Tfu, tfu, tfu!"'' (A Yiddish superstitious phrase, the equivalent of "kina hora"), and Tevye mockingly imitates her ''"Tfu, tfu, tfu!"'' and goes to sleep.


--->'''Tevye:''' As Jacob said, "I am slow of speech and slow of tongue."'

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--->'''Tevye''': As Abraham said, "I am a stranger in a strange land."
--->'''Mendel''': Moses said that.
--->'''Tevye:''' I'm sorry. As Jacob said, "I am slow of speech and slow of tongue."'

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*** Later becomes a TearJerker with Chava. ("There ''is'' no other hand.")

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** They're even funnier in the Yiddish production. Jackie Hoffman really milks her role!

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* The irony that United Artists chose Norman ''Jew''ison to direct under the assumption that he was Jewish. (He's not. He's Protestant.)


--->'''Tevye:''' I AM THE HEAD OF THIS FAMILY! AND I WANT TO SEE MOTEL'S MACHINE! ''(Pokes his head inside for literally one second then slams the door)'' Now let's go home!

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--->'''Tevye:''' Do not make me angry, woman! When I am angry, even ''flies'' do not fly!
--->'''Golde:''' [[SarcasmMode Oh, I'm so terrified. Maybe when I get home, I'll faint.]]
--->'''Tevye:''' WOMAN,
I AM THE HEAD OF THIS HOUSE! I RUN THE FAMILY! AND I WANT TO SEE MOTEL'S NEW MACHINE! ''(Pokes his head inside for literally one second then slams the door)'' Now let's go home!NOW LET'S GO HOME!

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** As the dancing ramps up Tevye mischievously distracts ''the Rabbi'' and tricks him into holding hands and dancing with a woman. When the Rabbi realizes the trick, he gamely compromises by separating their hands with his handkerchief.


* Yente: The way she sees and the way he looks, it's a perfect match!

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* Yente: The Yente, the village matchmaker, is describing one match she's come up with: a very ugly man with an extremely nearsighted woman.
-->The
way she sees and the way he looks, it's a perfect match!

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-->'''Villager:''' IT WAS TWEEEELVE! *waving arms wildly*

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