History Funny / BrooklynNineNineSeason4

[[folder: Coral Palms, Pt. 1 ]]

* Jake crying in a hot tub (surrounded by empty beer cans) while eating a burrito [[{{Squick}} that he previously dropped in the tub.]] Complete with Holt's reactions to this.
-->'''Holt:''' ''[with a mixture of pity and disgust]'' No, don't eat the burrito.\\

'''Jake:''' ''[sobbing]'' I'm disgusting!

-->'''Jake:''' Creator/KateHudson?\\

-->'''Holt:''' ''[whispering vindictively to himself]'' '''Carly will be the first to go.'''

-->'''Jake:''' ''[at Holtc]'' You, my friend, we will call Mr. Fart.\\

'''Holt:''' ''[genuinely livid]'' ''Oh go to '''HELL''', Larry!'' That's ''my'' walking group!

-->'''Jake:''' We have to get that video! Can we please just press pause on this fight and work together?\\

'''Holt:''' ''[wounded]'' That's even ''worse''!

* The manager is under the impression that Holt is a stoner, which keeps popping back up.

[[folder: Coral Palms, Pt. 2 ]]

'''Holt:''' ''(turns to face her)'' Oh, I didn't think this was a personal conversation.\\

'''Jake:''' ''(really looking uncomfortable)'' Yes.\\
'''Haas:''' Yes? ''(Jake quickly nods)'' Good. What if this person Larry met was young? I mean, really young.\\

'''Haas:''' Greg, you're really great at being undercover. You both passed the test. ''(gets out of her seat)'' Marco, ¡vámanos! ''(a [[LatinLover Cuban]] {{Hunk}} gets out of his seat several rows behind them and leaves with her)''

'''Rosa:''' Yeah. Tell him I said... ''(nods slightly)''\\

-->'''Gina:''' I would like you to tell Jacob that I'm thinking about him, and hoping that he's safe. ''(Amy and Charles stare at her, confused)'' What? Meet the new Gina, who always puts others before herself. Can you make the whole letter about me doing that?

'''Jake:''' But we don't have any money. ''(gasps)'' Oh my God. I'm the bribe, aren't I?\\

'''Jake:''' Yes, of course, of course. ''(searches his pocket)'' Oh. Would you look at that? I forgot my license, but I do have this big ol' wad--\\

* C.J. is, as it turns out, kind of incompetent.

-->'''Santiago:''' Hey Diaz? ''(looks back at Diaz's desk and sighs)'' Right. The walls. ''(walks to Diaz's desk and rings the doorbell)''\\
'''Diaz:''' ''(stands up to stick her head over the walls)'' Can I help you?\\

'''Diaz:''' Fine. One sec. ''(disappears behind the wall, retrieves the files, and hands it to Amy over the wall, resulting in it hitting Amy's face)''

-->'''Amy:''' What did he give you?!\\

'''Amy:''' ''(shaking her head)'' I'm sending this letter, with or without your signature. Enjoy your blood yogurt.\\

-->'''Sheriff:''' ''(reaching for his keys)'' Ooh, no, no!\\
'''Jake:''' ''(while his lips are pressed against Holt's)'' Is it working?\\

'''Sheriff:''' Not in my jail, no, no! ''(pulling Holt and Jake apart)'' Break it up! Whoa! ''(Jake and Holt shove the sheriff further into the jail and run out of it, slamming the jail door)'' Stop it! What are you doing?\\

'''Jake:''' Yeah, but we were just doing what we had to do. ''We're'' the good guys! ''(gasps)'' This is what they all think.

[[folder: Coral Palms, Pt. 3 ]]

'''Jake:''' OH MY GOD! ''(shudders and turns away, then looks at Holt's leg again)'' OH MY GOD! ''(turns away and closes his eyes)'' It's gonna be fine. ''(looks at Holt's leg again)'' OH MY GOD!

''(flashback to Jake standing on top of a stool retrieving needles, only to have the stool tip over and cause him to fall. He grabs onto the top of the shelf, which results in the shelf falling down on top of him. Then, dogs go after him.)''

-->'''Jake:''' All right, this is gonna hurt. But I'm gonna get you through it. ''(looks at the wound and gasps)'' Oh my God, I'm gonna throw up into your cut. ''(turns away)'' Oh, I saw inside of you. How are humans alive?!\\

'''Jake:''' Okay. ''(Holt pulls out the pipe, producing a "squish" sound)'' What was that sound? I did not like that "squish" sound.\\

'''Jake:''' Very much, you know. Oh, God, what if it doesn't go well? We haven't seen each other in a while, and ''(turns to Holt)'' what if it's weird? ''(sees Holt's wound and gasps, terrified, and turns away)''\\

'''Holt:''' I'm sure it will be magical when you see her. Aaaand ''(pulls needle and thread up)'' guess what?\\

'''Charles:''' Yes! Now get to it you lovebirds! ''(Jake and Amy move in for the kiss, and Charles appears right behind them)'' Here we go.\\

** Terry's incredibly creepy lullaby that he sings for the video:
-->'''Terry:''' Go to sleep, Daddy's dead, but his ghost's always watching...

-->'''Rosa:''' What the hell are you guys doing?

'''Jake:''' I didn't. I did. We did it to get out of jail, but it didn't mean anything. Just forget I said anything, right? Rewind. ''(makes rewinding sound)'' And kiss! ''(moves in for the kiss)''\\

'''Gina:''' Ah! ''(pulling dolly away towards the door)'' ''Garbanzo marinara! Pizzeria restaurante!'' Ahh!

''([[GilliganCut cut to]] Gina pushing Holt into the passenger seat)''\\

-->'''Amy:''' ''(pointing a gun at Figgis, who is in his car)'' Get out of the car!\\
'''Gina:''' ''(in the trailer truck, which is driving towards the car)'' YOUNG JEEZY, TAKE THE WHEEL!\\
''(the trailer truck crashes into the car)''\\
'''Holt:''' ''(in the driver's seat, holding his gun out)'' FREEZE, PUNK!\\
'''Gina:''' ''(pulling out a gun, too)'' Yeah, freeze, punk!\\

-->'''Rosa:''' Hey, Figgis. My fiance, Adrian Pimento, said when I caught you, I should read you this letter. ''(reads letter)'' "I want to lick the skin off your body, baby." Oh, that side's for me. ''(flips page over)'' "I want to rip the skin off your body, Jimmy."

[[folder: The Night Shift ]]

'''Gina:''' It's not a secret meeting, Jake. ''(holds up hair buzzer)'' It's an intervention.\\

-->'''Jake:''' Okay, I'll admit it. I went too deep down there in Florida. At one point, I think I forgot where the tip of me ended and the base of the tips began. ''(Rosa rolls her eyes)'' Before we just chop 'em off, would anybody like to say some final words?\\

-->'''Charles:''' Me and Jake are tip buds. ''(seeing Gina cutting off Jake's tips)'' What?! NOOOOO!\\

* "I'm gonna tell you the same thing they told me when they removed my testicle: welcome to your new life."

'''Diaz:''' I don't know. Maybe. Alright, see ya. ''(leaves)''

-->'''Charles:''' ''(in French accent)'' Jacques rolls his own cigarettes, a habit he picked up from a prostitute in Marseille, but that is not all he picked up.\\

-->'''Jake:''' ''(describing the actions of their characters)'' We gotta get out of here, so you turn to leave, you flick your cigarette. ''(traces path of cigarette with his cane)'' Using the cane, using the cane, this is awesome. ''(gasps)'' Voila. ''(in French accent)'' Zee butt!\\

-->'''Jess:''' If you're a cop, name ''one'' law.\\

-->'''Jake:''' He got away!\\

--->'''Jess:''' Man, I thought I had this city licked, but in the end it was me who got licked.
--->'''Jake:''' Wait, did that actually happen? 'Cause there have been some reported lickings recently, and if you got a good look at the guy...
--->'''Jess:''' I was obviously speaking metaphorically.
--->'''Jake:''' Right, me too. Our city is wonderful, it's a great place to walk around.

'''Gina:''' ''[Impressed]'' You're right. I do. God. It's like you're in ''here''. ''[Taps the side of her forehead]''

[[folder: Halloween IV ]]

* Amy announces the Halloween heist by daintily ringing a triangle only to be interrupted by Jake coming in and announcing it by using loud airhorns.
** And then, when Jake is making the announcement, Holt interrupts him with a ''marching band'' playing "Music/RideOfTheValkyries."
*** Amy and Jake's reactions to this are amusing.
-->'''Jake:''' Such a dork.\\

''(Bill, a guy who looks exactly like Charles, if a little taller and younger, walks out)''

** [[HoYay Rosa's voice when saying "Show me the binder" was also amusingly seductive.]]

-->'''Jake:''' Ah, trying to pick the lock el capitan? That'll take at least three minutes, by which time I'll have taken this plaque and hidden it somewhere you will never find it.\\
''(Jake breaks the lock and takes the plaque)''\\
'''Jake:''' Viola. [[TemptingFate Of course you could break the window, but you would never knowingly break government property. Would you?]]\\

'''Jake:''' Sure, it started out that way. ''[[HoYay [Takes Bill's hand]]]'' [[HoYay But you know how these things go. Spending time together. Sharing intimate secrets.]] ''[Pats Bill's shoulder]'' [[HoYay Laughing about nothing in particular.]] ''[Laughs]''\\

'''Charles:''' ''[Anguished]'' Holt has the plaque! It's hidden in the evidence room in a box marked "Cold Cases 1972"!\\

[[folder: Monster in the Closet ]]

* At the very end, when Rosa goes to Holt's office to thank him for his contribution to the wedding, Holt reacts very cagily and refuses to let her in. When Rosa eventually barges her way in, she discovers he's built a balloon arch over his desk, which leads to this little moment:
-->'''Rosa:''' Oh my God, Captain... she is ''magnificent''.\\
'''Holt:''' Vindi'''caTIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!'''

[[folder: Mr. Santiago ]]

'''Jake:''' Oh yeah?!?! Well I don't want my only girlfriend daughtering a jerk dad! Burn on you!

[[folder: Skyfire Cycle ]]

''(flashback to 1998, with Jake being interviewed by a news reporter)''\\

''(end flashback)''\\

'''Holt:''' ''({{beat}})'' You're fired.

'''Charles:''' Uh-oh, did I? ''(licks his hand)'' 'Cause my skin still tastes pretty raw!\\

-->'''Fanboy:''' Are you the guys passing out the Qwandor petition?\\

''(flashback to earlier)''\\

''(back to present)''\\

'''Amy:''' Okay, Rosa! ''(runs off while Rosa grins, smugly)''

-->'''Jake:''' ''[sobbing]'' It happened again! It happened again, Terry!

[[folder: The Overmining ]]

'''Rosa:''' It's insane! [[ForWantOfANail All because we shut down a foot massage place...]]\\

'''Rosa:''' So it's agreed: we let them stay open. ''(holds out her hand)'' For the sake of the city!\\
'''Charles:''' ''(shakes Rosa's hand)'' For the sake of the city!\\

-->'''Rosa:''' NYPD! Get down on the comfortable matted floor!\\

[[folder: Captain Latvia ]]

-->'''Hitchcock:''' Pop! Pop! Dropping bodies, it’s a stick up your punk as-
-->'''Holt:''' No, Hitchcock. There's no rapping, you grossly misread the situation.

-->'''Hitchcock:''' My rapping’s still on the table.
-->'''Holt:''' It’s not even in the dining room!

'''Charles''': No. I. Don't. I'm gonna shimmy them off. ''(Starts shimmying his pants off while maintaining full eye contact with Jake)''\\

'''Charles''': ''(Gets the pants off)'' I told you, Jake, [[InnocentInnuendo I'll do anything to perk up my little man!]]\\

[[folder: The Fugitive ]]

* Doug Judy hates his foster brother because George stole from his mother, burned their house down, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking stole Doug's vinyl copy of Music/PhilCollins's ''No Jacket Required''.]]

* Rosa admires Marshawn Lynch for his taciturn public nature, and is disillusioned to discover that in private he's ''incredibly'' chatty.

-->'''Holt:''' Do you know how many crimes we're forgiving? Six...
-->'''Jake:''' That's not so bad...
-->'''Holt:''' Hundred!
-->'''Jake:''' Oh, that's way more.
-->'''Holt:''' Grand theft auto, grand theft auto, grand theft auto, [[ArsonMurderandJaywalking dog fraud.]]
-->'''Doug:''' I sold a guy a fake Pekingese. 'Twas a cat!
-->'''Holt:''' You will not win me over with your use of ''twas'.
-->'''Doug:''' 'Twasn't trying to.
-->'''Jake:''' ''(snickers)''
-->'''Holt:''' You are clearly friends with this man, and you have lost your objectivity, Peralta.
-->'''Jake:''' Or have you lost '''your''' objectivity! ''(stands up, Doug follows)'' ''(whispers to Doug)'' What are you doing?
-->'''Doug:''' ''(whispering)'' My bad, thought we were leaving.
-->'''Jake:''' ''(whispering)'' No, I'm just making a point. Sit down.

* Rosa climbs over a wall with ease after Terry claims it's impossible to climb.

-->'''Rosa:''' Now you know my greatest shame.

[[folder: The Audit ]]

'''Amy:''' ''[wide-eyed and strangled]'' Yep.\\

'''Amy and Jake:''' ''[in unison]'' [[OverlyLongGag Yep]].\\
'''Rosa:''' ''[resigned]'' We had a good run.

''[[{{Touche}} (Jake and Amy nod)]]''

-->'''Rosa:''' Did it work?
-->'''Charles:''' Nope. Now they call him pee-boy. It's much worse off.

-->'''Jake:''' How did you ever date him? Oh no... He has a really big wiener, doesn't he? Wait! Don't tell me if it's true! Unless it's not. But no if you don't say anything I'll know that it is! Gah! Why aren't you saying anything about his wiener, Amy?
-->'''Amy:''' ''[trying to calm him down]'' Jake...
-->'''Jake:''' Stop, stop, stop, I don't want to hear about your ex's wiener. You are not making me feel better! How could you do this to me?
-->'''Amy:''' ''[grabs Jake's shoulders and shakes him around]'' Jake, stop spiraling!
-->'''Jake:''' Every time you shake me, I see it flopping!

-->'''Holt:''' I've never been more proud of you for anything in your life.
-->'''Terry:''' I mean... I've solved a lot of cases for you?
-->'''Holt:''' ''[completely deadpan]'' And yet crime has continued.

-->'''Teddy:''' ''[calmly, to Rachel]'' Okay, should we hit up the Tenement Museum?\\
'''Rachel, Amy, and Jake:''' ''[in unison]'' '''''No!'''''

[[folder: Serve and Protect ]]

-->'''Amy:''' Hey it's time for some girl talk! Lemme see that... bra.
-->'''Hopkins:''' Excuse me?

-->'''Rosa:''' Listen to yourself. You are letting this cloud your judgment.
-->'''Jake:''' I love clouds! They keep the sun away on hot days.
-->'''Rosa:''' He doesn't want us to solve the case. He's buying us off. He's shady.
-->'''Jake:''' I love the shade. It keeps the sun away on hot days.

-->'''Woman:''' Hey, sexy! Ready to go?
-->'''Grayson:''' [[ImplausibleDeniability That's my... goddaughter.]]

-->'''Charles:''' From now on, the only [[DoubleEntendre black male]] I want anything to do with is you.
-->'''Holt:''' That is incredibly inappropriate.
-->'''Charles:''' I know but I just thought of it. I was so proud I had to say it.

'''Mark:''' ''[instant capitulation]'' [[KnowWhenToFoldEm I stand corrected. Yeah. You got me. I did it. Good job.]]

[[folder: The Last Ride ]]

-->'''Jake:''' Time to gear up. It's not the best case ever without some toys.
-->'''Charles:''' Oh yeah, toys for boys!
-->'''Jake:''' I don't if I like that...
-->'''Charles:''' Adult toys!
-->'''Jake:''' Still sounds wrong...
-->'''Charles:''' Male toys?
-->'''Jake:''' Let's just not call them toys. It's my fault, I started it.

-->'''Amy''': There are ten hours left, sir. If you talk fast, you can teach me '''everything'''.
-->'''Holt''': Interesting. ... Okay. You have to take notes, do you think you can keep up?
-->'''Amy''': [''cocky''] Let's just say I was president of the Stenographers' Club in High School ''for a reason''.
-->'''Holt''': Was the reason because you were the only member?
-->'''Amy''': [''long pause''] Yes.

[[folder: Moo Moo ]]

-->'''Jake:''' TV and cake were my parents. ''[nervous laughing]''

-->'''Amy:''' ''[comforting Jake]'' It's okay.

-->'''Terry:''' Cagney can't sleep without Moo Moo. And if Cagney doesn't sleep, Lacey doesn't sleep. And if Cagney and Lacey don't sleep...
-->'''Jake:''' Terry doesn't sleep.
-->'''Terry:''' No, Jake doesn't live!
-->'''Jake:''' Oh, my god.

[[folder: Cop Con ]]

-->'''Jake:''' If there's one thing I know, it's how to sneak out to a party without your parents finding out. I used to do it all the time.
-->'''Amy:''' ''[squints at Jake]''
-->'''Jake:''' Once.
-->'''Rosa:''' ''[also squints at Jake]''
-->'''Jake:''' To go to a Magic: the Gathering tournament. I got stuck in the window like Winnie the Pooh. There, you know everything!
-->'''Amy:''' ''[unconvinced stare at Jake]''
-->'''Jake:''' My mom had to pull me back in with my ponytail.

--> '''Jake:''' Ah! I also hate the sound which [[BlatantLies I can definitely hear.]]
--> '''Charles:''' Me, too. It's so high-pitched ... or low-pitched! ''(shuts it off)'' Oh, that was bogus to the extreme!
--> '''Jake:''' Ugh, so bogus and not tubular. ''(completely deadpan)'' My ears are ringing from the pain of being young.
--> '''Charles:''' [[TotallyRadical So not gnarly.]]

* When Holt is about to discover the party, Amy has to Shush everyone. Rosa is impressed and it leads to an... interesting exchange with Jake when he compares Amy to a librarian with a noticeable note of arousal in his voice.
-->'''Rosa:''' You mean like a sexy librarian?"\\

--> '''Woman''': Your hands feel a bit clammy.
--> '''Scully''': Yeah, they're covered in clams.

--> '''Amy''': Dont talk about your foot fungus. Or your eye fungus. In fact, just avoid fungus entirely.
--> '''Scully''': *later* Guess what my foot and my eye have in common! Oh wait. *looks at the list* Nothing.

-->'''Scully:''' ''[dejected]'' I'm no Hitchcock when it comes to the ladies.
-->'''Amy:''' You don't want to be.
-->'''Scully:''' He's fearless! I once saw him ask out a breastfeeding mother.

* Hitchcock shouting "beer me!" once Amy declares the party to be back on. A beer can hits the back of his head, knocking him out.
** The gang had to throw their own party because the Boston cops hosting the first party got arrested for accepting bribes. They claim it's because "they partied too hard".
* When the gang wakes up after the party, they realize that they lost Holt's laptop over the course of the night, but since they cant remember anything they have to retrace their steps. Among other things, Terry shot Jake in the chest with a roman candle, Jake jumped into the pool to put the fire out and ended up wearing a pillowcase as a shirt, Amy threw up in said pillowcase, and Boyle threw a robot cop off the balcony.

-->'''Holt:''' I want to show you a picture from last night that really upset me.
-->'''Jake:''' Okay, but in my defense Rosa bet me 50 cents that I couldn't drink all that shampoo.
-->'''Holt:''' That's not what I wanted to-- [[DoubleTake you drank shampoo?]]
-->'''Jake:''' What? No. [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial You're the one farting bubbles]].

[[folder: Chasing Amy ]]

-->'''Jake:''' You cae it, you relax, you nail the real one, you become a sergent and you make grateful love to me for fourteen hours straight.\\

'''Jake:''' Alright, One hour. Fifteen minutes. Eight. Three but they're mind-blowing!

-->'''Scully:''' ''(holding a mountain of snacks)'' What a day!
* This about Amy being worried about her test.
-->'''Jake:''' Ames, I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but you gotta calm the F-train down! You're gonna ace this test.\\
'''Amy:''' You think that because you love me, and love has made you dumb.\\
'''Jake:''' I disagree; if anything, love has made me smarter. Remember last week, when I boiled that egg?\\
'''Amy:''' That was big. I was really proud of you.
* Jake observes that Amy's panic levels have different signs. At level 1, she obsessively braids her hair. At level 2, she "creepily sings songs from the Great American Songbook" (cut to Amy creepily singing "You're A Grand Old Flag" while studying in bed, with Jake huddling next to her).
-->'''Jake''': So, yeah, it's a little tough right now, but I think the worst is behind us.
-->'''Amy''': [''screaming at the microwave''] '''WHY''' ARE YOU TAKING SO LONG TO COOK MY '''FRICKIN'''' OATMEAL?
-->[''She rips it off the counter, flings it to the ground, beats it repeatedly with her baton and then stomps on it.'']

-->'''Holt:''' All aboard! The train will be departing in 45 minutes. ''([[LiteralMinded starts waiting]] [[NotHyperbole with clocks ticking in the background]])''

[[folder: Your Honor ]]

-->'''Amy:''' You are looking at the Second Circuit Court of Appeals Judge Laverne Holt.
-->'''Charles:''' Captain Holt's mom?
-->'''Jake:''' *Gasp* The creator!

-->'''Jake:''' I'm very excited to meet you. And let me just say, I'm a huge fan of your early work. Talkin' about this guy right here. ''(indicates Holt)''\\

-->'''Gina:''' Okay, fine. But on one condition: You buy me lunch.
-->'''Amy:''' What? No! I'm doing you a favour!
-->'''Gina:''' Phone.
-->'''Amy:''' Okay no no no no! Whatever you want! Fine! Just let me teach you please! I need a win today.

-->'''Laverne:''' ''(flatly)'' Oh my, that is shocking. [[ThatMakesMeFeelAngry I am shocked right now.]]
-->'''Holt:''' ''(flatly)'' [[ThatMakesMeFeelAngry And I am enraged. We are shocked and enraged.]]
-->'''Jake:''' Yes, and we're all showing it.

[[folder: The Slaughterhouse ]]

-->'''Holt:''' Oh Santiago, You're faking.
-->'''Amy:''' Faking? What? Uh, did you hear that "grr"?
-->'''Holt:''' Just admit it.
-->'''Amy:''' Okay, fine, I was faking the whole time, but I only did it because I wanted you to enjoy it.
-->'''Holt:''' That ruins it. I mean, it's supposed to be good for both of us.
-->'''Amy:''' It was good! Just because I didn't get angry doesn't mean I didn't get anything out of it.
-->'''Holt:''' Yeah, but the whole point is for you to get angry. Did you even get close?
-->'''Amy:''' Uhh...
-->'''Holt:''' What about your last CO? Could he make you angry?
-->'''Amy:''' Wellll, he-
-->'''Holt:''' You know what, I don't wanna know. Don't tell me. I don't wanna know.

[[folder: The Bank Job ]]

-->'''Instructor:''' Keep wagging back there!
-->'''Jake:''' I '''''AM''''' wagging, '''''BRENDA'''''!
* Hitchcock turns out to be a fan of Literature/TheFaultInOurStars.

-->'''Charles:''' Put your hands up! And clap for me! Cause I'm gonna be a daddy.
-->'''Suspect:''' ''(claps above head)''
-->'''Charles:''' ''(excitedly)'' Thank you!

-->'''Pimento:''' Great. (grabs knife) Who are we killing? I won't do kids. That's a rule. But that rule is negotiable if that kid's a dick.

-->'''Jake:''' Is there anything off limits?
* Pimento tries to teach Rosa and Jake how to fake snorting cocaine, but ends up snorting it 3 different times. This leads to him taking his shirt off, talking about the Statue of Liberty, and trying to juggle knives.

[[folder: Crime and Punishment ]]

* One of Rosa's alibis was that she was at a Film/LaLaLand sing along.

** The hackers find out about his modelling gig for a Japanese catalog, his nineties dance video "Da Bassment" and an order of anklets.

-->'''Holt:''' Why would she give you her jacket and motorcycle helmet?
-->'''Hitchcock:''' Cause we're in love, ''doy''!
-->'''Holt:''' ''(bewildered and disgusted expression)''
* The recurring gag that Gina can read the jury's facial expression. They range from painfully obvious to humorous.

-->'''Doug:''' I sold a guy a fake Pekingese. Twas a cat!
-->'''Holt:''' You will not win me over with your use of 'twas'.
-->'''Doug:''' Twasn't trying to.

* Doug Judy hates his foster brother because George stole from his mother, burned their house down, and stole Doug's vinyl copy of Music/PhilCollins's ''No Jacket Required''.

* Jake decides to use the floor-waxing time period as the opportunity to, as he puts it, "full bullpen", which is to slide across the floor, wearing socks, straight from the office he and the rest of the team are huddled in all the way over to the elevator. Ramping up the funny is when the elevator door opens just as Jake is about to reach it, and he sails in to encounter Captain Holt. A few moments later...

'''Holt:''' ''(calmly, in front of Diaz and Santiago)'' Don't ever speak to me like that ever again. ''(walks back to his office)''\\

* Rosa's scarily spot-on impression of Amy.

** After the MTA confronts the Holt and makes a crack about the Nine-Nine being the only bomb, Amy replies with an incredibly LameComeback

* Pimento tries to teach Rosa and Jake how to fake snorting cocaine, but ends up snorting it 3 different times.

-->'''Holt:''' '''Carly will be the first to go.'''