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History Creator / MitchHedberg

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* CrowdPleaser: "You can't please all the people all the time. And yesterday, all those people were at my show."
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Index wick removal


* DoubleStandard: "[[TheAlcoholic Alcoholism]] is a disease, but [[AcceptableTargets it's the only one you can get yelled at for having]]. 'Goddamn it, Otto, you're an alcoholic.' 'Goddamn it, Otto, you have lupus.' One of those two doesn’t sound right."

to:

* DoubleStandard: "[[TheAlcoholic Alcoholism]] is a disease, but [[AcceptableTargets it's the only one you can get yelled at for having]].having. 'Goddamn it, Otto, you're an alcoholic.' 'Goddamn it, Otto, you have lupus.' One of those two doesn’t sound right."

Changed: 63

Removed: 48

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* PaymentPlanPitch: "They say this product is available for four easy payments. I'd like to see one with three easy payments and one ''fucking complicated'' payment... We're not telling you which one, but one of these payments is going to be a ''bitch''. The mailman will get shot to death, the envelope will not seal, and the stamp will be in the wrong denomination. Good luck, fucker!"
%%** "That last payment must be made in Wampum!"

to:

* PaymentPlanPitch: "They say this product is available for four easy payments. I'd like to see one with three easy payments and one ''fucking complicated'' payment... We're not telling you which one, but one of these payments is going to be a ''bitch''. The mailman will get shot to death, the envelope will not seal, and the stamp will be in the wrong denomination. Good luck, fucker!"
%%** "That
fucker!"[[note]]"The last payment must be made in Wampum!"''Wampum!''"[[/note]]

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