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Wolfenstein, if it was directed by Seltzer and Friedberg
I admit, I put a lot of weight on a cool concept. I know that's generally a bad thing, but that's just how I am. For instance, I played through Turning Point Fall of Liberty several times despite it being an Obvious... PreAlpha simply because it had a really cool premise of the Nazis winning WW 2 and then invading America. I literally played through a crap game multiple times because I was intrigued by this premise. And seeing as how I also immensely enjoyed the Wolfenstein series for its Stupid Jetpack Hitler and Ghostapo inspired storylines and gameplay, I must say I was actually quite looking forward to this movie.

I hated it.

Yeah, the concept of a Nazi army invading from the moon was not enough to outweigh the absolute awfulness of this movie, and here's why. It's a parody movie. Now the concept of Nazis invading from the moon is an inherently comical idea, so I was expecting it'd be like a parody of those old pulp novels that feature Nazis in high tech blimps menacing a dashing hero, but no, it goes the Seltzer and Friedberg route of simply lampooning everything it can think of. We see an idiot President that's totally not Sarah Palin. This was released in 2012. Way to keep up with the times, movie. That's not even going into the fact that it basically calls all Republicans Nazis, which is stuff you see in stupid Youtube debates, not in movies attempting to have intelligent humor. And then there's pointless parody scenes like the one that parodies Der Untergang simply because of the Gag Sub phenomenon. It has nothing to do with the plot at all. The characters are also terrible. Everyone is either a Nazi (meaning we hate them by default), a Jar Jar Binks-like black guy, or a parody. Nobody is likeable, so you don't care about anyone at all. This is a Seltzer and Friedberg movie. It doesn't matter if it's a Finnish movie, the style, tone, and everything else about it is pretty much a Seltzer and Friedberg movie, and it's about as funny.

When I first saw the trailer, I wanted to see this movie because of its ludicrously awesome premise, but then I never heard anything about it anymore, and now I know why.

Frankly, the movie would've been better if they just made it a straight action/adventure movie. You wanna know what would be the result? Wolfenstein
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