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Oh dear
This was utterly hilarious. I was laughing throughout the entire thing. To see Alex become singlemindly dedicated to protecting that kitten was strangely entertaining. And to see Blackwatch dedicate all its resources to find said kitten creates the funniest parts of the story. Having every character except Cross and Alex be reduced to baby talking idiots at the sight of the cat makes this the funniest thing I have read in a while. I highly recommend this if you have played the game and need a laugh.
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Can I hold him? Pleeease?
This is one of the most hilarious things I've ever been fortunate enough to find. Alex Mercer, by chance, discovers a powerful beast. One that can send Hunters packing at a single cursory glance, one that can melt the minds of all who gaze upon it. This is DEATHCAT PRIME.

The humor is brilliant, snarky, and trying to picture this sort of thing in-game will have you laughing hysterically.

Let's just say getting Dana Mercer a birthday present is not as simple a task as it may seem. Then again, since when is anything easy for Alex?
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A Thousand Dead Voices Scream "Awwww, Kitty!"
In short: It's Batman humour. There is just nothing funnier than the thought of the big bad grumpy tentacle hoodie monster finding, carrying and protecting a kitten for his baby sister's birthday.

The writer gets more mileage out of the concept than one might expect, including Blackwatch, Randall, Cross, and a few cameos from other game franchises; the world's most punctual and least diligent pet store employee; the recurring idea of kitten grenades; and a truly bizarre method for winning a fight with a Hunter. It's all topped off by a genuinely cute ending, a rare thing in Prototype fanfiction. It's the very last place you'd look for it, but if you want short, sweet and funny, it's recommended.
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