Reviews: First Try Series

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Awesome fic, but not without its flaws
This has been one of the few really good retellings of Naruto, up there with Team 8 in terms of overall quality. Naruto as a veteran genin surprisingly works and Tetsuo is a great sensei to him, and Suzume and Satoshi are both enjoyable to read about. However, it isn't without its flaws.

One of the biggest flaws is that the author...really has trouble writing action. Its not bad, per say, but it just lacks flow, and instead of showing a full fight scene on screen we get a play by play after the fight ends. What should be entertaining fights, such as Naruto vs Neji or Naruto vs Gaara are practically glossed over with the latter being an almost Off Screen Moment Of Awesome.

Another flaw is how he handles Naruto's character. He turns Naruto from a Genius Ditz who has one of the biggest, most forgiving hearts in the entirety of Shonen (up there with fricken Goku-or even better) into a somewhat cynical person who rarely forgives. This is in complete odds with his canon personality. He refuses to forgive Kakashi and let him train him, he muses that he'll never forgive Gaara (and even doesn't get the whole Not So Different characterization), and genuinely acts like a cynical bastard. Not to mention changing his overall enjoyable fighting style from using his clones in inventive ways to...laying traps. Not that that's bad, but it just doesn't fit with the Naruto we all know and love from canon. And his refusal to even try to learn to use the Fox's power is a Wall Banger in itself and not only short sighted, but insanely stupid.

Another thing he got wrong is KN0 being capable of all these feats when in canon, its a power that even genin such as Sasuke, Neji, or Gaara can handle. The second KN 0 Naruto attacked Zabuza in anger he should have been on the receiving end of a Curb-Stomp Battle after all. Its not like in Part II where it'd be justified, given Naruto has reached Jonin level himself at the start of Shippuden. It just seems like a downgrade for the enemies and an upgrade for Naruto.

However, despite these flaws it is not only an enjoyable fic, but highly recommended from me. Its still a absolute joy to read.
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