First, my credentials: I beat every Battletoads game there is. I am no stranger to pain, and that statement allows me to preemptively dismiss anyone who may accuse me of just complaining that the game is "too hard".
God Hand could have been a contender. I bought it after seeing clips from the game, expecting it to be a hilarious, over-the-top beat-down I was craving.
Instead... I got what is best described as pie covered in sewage. And I beat it strictly out of idiotic gamer pride, but I did not enjoy it. Now, that's not to say that God Hand doesn't have redeeming qualities. There are salvageable bits of unspoiled pie, but it's overall inedible. God Hand bombed for good reason.
The Good Bits
Where God Hand shines is in its boss battles, especially the ones against Elvis. Taunting someone who can obviously beat you into the ground is rewarding in a "Devil May Cry" way, as is mocking them with Gene's dodging tactics. Sure, if they hit you it's going to hurt like crazy BUT that's what makes it thrilling. The rip-off of the Hawaii Five-O's theme song really works and it was a great move to make it play during the God Hand invincibility. Add a useful taunt and ability to generally act like an arrogant jerk ("Nyah-nyah, you can't hit me I'm dodging!") during fights works beautifully, and the Roulette Moves are lots of fun.
The Bad Bits & Sewage
The regular enemies also are far too defensive, and while their blocks can be exploited the fact that they can leap out of a combo just bogs down the combat. Never mind the fact that the tank controls are bloody awful, making it impossible to quickly turn to face threats or even move about the level. The really fun elements of the game - roulette - are too sparse to use. Several levels/bosses are drawn out to the point of being a chore. (Final boss, could you mix it up a little at least?) Speaking of chores, move selection needs an overhaul.
Lazy (or cut-short) development features prominently in the randomization of power-ups and demons, and jerk-ass design appears in the casino (prize tickets). The replay mode is a joke, and the store doesn't allow even a basic health-restoring purchase in-between levels.
Overall
Overall, what should have been a fun, over-the-top beat-em up is just a bad game stuck in the 80's.
Wasted Potential
First, my credentials: I beat every Battletoads game there is. I am no stranger to pain, and that statement allows me to preemptively dismiss anyone who may accuse me of just complaining that the game is "too hard".
God Hand could have been a contender. I bought it after seeing clips from the game, expecting it to be a hilarious, over-the-top beat-down I was craving.
Instead... I got what is best described as pie covered in sewage. And I beat it strictly out of idiotic gamer pride, but I did not enjoy it. Now, that's not to say that God Hand doesn't have redeeming qualities. There are salvageable bits of unspoiled pie, but it's overall inedible. God Hand bombed for good reason.
The Good Bits
Where God Hand shines is in its boss battles, especially the ones against Elvis. Taunting someone who can obviously beat you into the ground is rewarding in a "Devil May Cry" way, as is mocking them with Gene's dodging tactics. Sure, if they hit you it's going to hurt like crazy BUT that's what makes it thrilling. The rip-off of the Hawaii Five-O's theme song really works and it was a great move to make it play during the God Hand invincibility. Add a useful taunt and ability to generally act like an arrogant jerk ("Nyah-nyah, you can't hit me I'm dodging!") during fights works beautifully, and the Roulette Moves are lots of fun.
The Bad Bits & Sewage
The regular enemies also are far too defensive, and while their blocks can be exploited the fact that they can leap out of a combo just bogs down the combat. Never mind the fact that the tank controls are bloody awful, making it impossible to quickly turn to face threats or even move about the level. The really fun elements of the game - roulette - are too sparse to use. Several levels/bosses are drawn out to the point of being a chore. (Final boss, could you mix it up a little at least?) Speaking of chores, move selection needs an overhaul.
Lazy (or cut-short) development features prominently in the randomization of power-ups and demons, and jerk-ass design appears in the casino (prize tickets). The replay mode is a joke, and the store doesn't allow even a basic health-restoring purchase in-between levels.
Overall
Overall, what should have been a fun, over-the-top beat-em up is just a bad game stuck in the 80's.