Within the first minutes of this film, I immediately began wondering what on earth the point of this movie was supposed to be. Was it supposed to be an epic Myth Arc-building thriller like The Bourne Identity? No, the plot and every single action scene's choreography were too heavily loaded with Fridge Logic, lacking even the Scotch Tape that would've indicated some kind of a failed effort to staunch my Suspension Of Disbelief's massive hemorrhaging. Was it supposed to be a brainlessly fun “Blow Stuff Up and Kill Dudes” Cliché Storm like Last Man Standing? No, the action keeps stopping while we Contemplate Our Navels. Was it actually trying to make some kind of a point, getting all postmodern and meta like The Matrix? No, because it sprinkled dumb jokes and visual gags throughout the movie, regardless of what was happening a few seconds ago. Was it a comedic send-up of action movies, like Naked Gun, Last Action Hero, or Hot Fuzz? No, when the WE ARE BEING FUNNY switch *clunk*s to the “off” position and the characters say something ernest (yet oh so terribly trite) or an action scene does something horrendously corny, the film plays it without the slightest trace of irony or winking campiness, expecting the audience to treat it absolutely dead serious. Was it, then, a completely heartless cash-grab aimed at disaffected boys like Jumper? In my opinion, no. Its budget was way too high, the cast was too big-name, and the film seemed to be trying way too hard. Not only does Wanted skip randomly between delivering mountains of corn with a completely straight face and trying to crack jokes about itself, it mangles both elements through its clumsy handling. This is not an action film, this is not a deconstruction, this is not even a Troperiffic tour de force of action movies. What is this movie for? So far as I can imagine, maybe it's just a giant prank on everyone who watches it.
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