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Dwarf Fortress Succession Game III:Jawmetal

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Durza Possibly Demonic from Beigeknife Since: Dec, 2011
Possibly Demonic
#1051: Dec 20th 2013 at 11:08:39 AM

Guys, I'm really sorry about missing my stuff. There were some unexpected things that came up and had to be seen to, the end result of which was that I was without an internet connection for the last two weeks.

If no one's started playing yet, I have a file I was just playing for fun that's currently late winter of what would be my year if I'd started when I should have. I can finish that tonight, write some stuff and upload it early tomorrow if that's ok with everyone. I might as well mention that there was a lot of death during this, though. I wasn't intending to subject it onto others.

edited 20th Dec '13 11:10:01 AM by Durza

Your malevolence knows no bounds. I absolutely love it – viha Kirbonium.
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1052: Dec 20th 2013 at 12:11:56 PM

Please, do! I'm sorry we supplanted. Go ahead and write up, and do up, and let us have some Fun. :)

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
Durza Possibly Demonic from Beigeknife Since: Dec, 2011
Possibly Demonic
#1053: Dec 20th 2013 at 1:23:45 PM

I should have it up by tomorrow morning then. There may be dead babies present in the fortress, but I can hardly be held responsible for that, now, can I?

Your malevolence knows no bounds. I absolutely love it – viha Kirbonium.
Jreaper Since: Dec, 2013
#1054: Dec 20th 2013 at 2:42:36 PM

Am loving these fortresses have actually started playing because of you guys would I be able to get dorfed, craftsdwarf for preference

TuefelHundenIV Night Clerk of the Apacalypse. from Doomsday Facility Corner Store. Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
#1055: Dec 20th 2013 at 4:36:00 PM

If I can ever get the damn website to cooperate in Flash I will have something up that has the sum total journals of each players journals in a Book like pic.

I am tempted to say screw it and just go wtih HTML 5 and just make shit loads of linked subpages for it.

Who watches the watchmen?
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1056: Dec 20th 2013 at 5:54:29 PM

Jreaper, we have so many craftsdwarfs that whoever comes up next, I promise you I will give you one as well.

There will be at least two Jreapers roaming free.

Perhaps more, if I get into a namey mood.

I'll name every baby BABBY JREAPER

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
TuefelHundenIV Night Clerk of the Apacalypse. from Doomsday Facility Corner Store. Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
#1057: Dec 20th 2013 at 6:27:09 PM

Lol.

Hey guys just a heads up.

The Big DF update is coming soon. This changes gameplay widely. It allows certain features though like actually retiring a fort instead of trying to kill it. Meaning the fort will still exist. There is a boatload of changes coming for both fortress and adventure mode.

Who watches the watchmen?
Jreaper Since: Dec, 2013
#1058: Dec 20th 2013 at 11:13:27 PM

Just the one dwarf is enough......For now

Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1059: Dec 21st 2013 at 5:54:18 AM

By the way, in my personal Masterwork failFort 'Blameboard', I've turned autolabor on, and have everybody sleeping in a giant dwarfnest in a single room. My dwarves have gone full Soviet!

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
TuefelHundenIV Night Clerk of the Apacalypse. from Doomsday Facility Corner Store. Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
#1060: Dec 21st 2013 at 6:21:21 AM

You fool! Don't you know you should never go full Soviet!

edited 23rd Dec '13 2:35:01 AM by TuefelHundenIV

Who watches the watchmen?
Durza Possibly Demonic from Beigeknife Since: Dec, 2011
Possibly Demonic
#1061: Dec 23rd 2013 at 2:28:25 AM

File: http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=8234

Durza’s Log, 1st Moonstone, 260.

Apparently, Gand is giving control of the fortress to Caspellaer. I’ve used my position as secretary to the mayor, and the fact that he neglected to tell anyone else, to seize control for myself. Nevertheless, I promise not to be evil this time around. Armok shall be glorified, as shall... other gods.

To begin my reign in a fittingly benevolent manner, I’ve ordered the construction of a more efficient dump site. This strange bridge contraption is clogging the fortress with miasma, and frankly I have better things to do than waste my time remembering when a lever needs to be pulled. I’ll leave the bridge there as a memorial to the many lives that were doubtless lost to it.

A quick check tells me that the vampire I had plans for is no more, so I shall instead proceed immediately to the construction of a device which will bring the blessings of Armok down on us, Loving Armok’s Vehicle of Ascension. I shall also create a completely non-lethal day care centre so that the many, many children of Jawmetal don’t get under my heels while I’m drawing plans.

3rd Moonstone.

I’ve discovered a filthy, knee deep pool of water near the entrance to the fortress. Gand tells me that it’s for hygiene, so... I guess I’ll leave it there.

Jawmetal also appears to have obtained several prisoners of war. I think I’ll add most of them to our new rubbish disposal system, though I may keep the general. Note: we appear to have many, many cats. I may add a few of them to my new system.

Additional note: there are several cage traps outside my bedroom. I don’t think they pose any threat to me, but it’s somewhat disconcerting to see the mistrust that my fellow dwarves hold for me.

Last note, I promise: there is a lot of graffiti around the fortress now. While I’m unwilling to remove it for fear of needlessly provoking my peons, I certainly don’t believe that I should make food instead of war, and the Emperor will definitely not be protecting anyone in this fortress.

20th Moonstone.

I’ve modified the plans for the LAVA system somewhat. It shall now include a power source for Bladebound’s THRONE system, and definitely won’t corrupt it with dark energies.

Additionally, a lot of the children in the fortress seem to be novice carpenters or stonemasons. I’m not sure why this should be, but they’re unwilling to obey my orders that they leave the work to their elders.

I’ve decided to do something about the mass of weapon and cage traps that are preventing caravans from accessing our front gate, though in all honesty I doubt anyone has anything that we would want. My options are to dig a very circuitous tunnel so that no invaders would choose to pass through it instead of going directly through the traps, or remove a portion of the traps, though this means that a lot of circular saws will be going to waste.

28th Moonstone.

Unfortunately, to supply fuel for LAVA, I’m going to require a power source blessed by the four gods, and for this I will, unfortunately, need a sacrifice. To this end, I’ve added a lowly peasant to my followers, put his through various rituals, given him a pickaxe and walled him in next to the magma spire. I’ve code named him Isaac.

1st Opal.

My new garbage dump is complete. Instead of needing to remember to pull a lever, items and cats shall be dumped directly into lava, saving time all around. I’ve made sure that the dwarves will be high enough above the lava that no unfortunate splashes occur.

On a completely unrelated topic, I’ve noticed that we’re a bit behind on slab production, so I’ve ordered the dwarves to get back to work in that regard.

10th Opal.

It seems I forgot to strip the prisoners before dropping them into Armok’s eternal embrace, but since most of their equipment was copper and our army is fully equipped, I doubt it matters much.

The mayor stormed into my cottage just now, demanding that we construct low boots. I’ll get around to that once I’ve finished accidentally tossing him into lava.

15th Opal.

The ghost of Shem Ikalmorul has attacked a child. The child seems mostly unharmed, so I’ll try get a slab up for him before it happens again.

Another ghost is howling through the fortress, which I’m sure can’t be good for those who need sleep.

In other news, I think we may have too much food. Certainly more than we could get through in five years, maybe more.

6th Obsidian.

Some guy has created Roastbored the Slow Butterfly, a badger leather leggings.

20th Obsidian.

Oscar the First has bestowed the name ‘The Gleeful Joy’ upon his silver war hammer. I can admire someone who enjoys his job that much.

In other news, a vile force of darkness has arrived. There’s no sign of the master of the goblin civilisation, so I think I might let the traps handle them.

22nd Obsidian.

So, someone decided to move the barracks back inside. I’m not sure why, since all it really accomplishes is giving our troops sun sickness and delaying them from battle.

In any case, rather than wait inside the weapon traps, the militia caught sight of the trolls impaling themselves on our saws and ran out to do battle with the goblins. The only casualties are a pair of marksdwarves with several broken bones each.

1st Granite, 261.

One of our sword masters has died of old age. So has a cat.

20th Granite.

So it turns out that someone decided to only allow drinks in our main food stockpile, resulting in our crops rotting in the fields. I’ve rectified that.

LAVA is nearing completion.

A kobold thief recently appeared outside the gates, stabbed a child to death and then ran away. This should provide justification for me keeping the children inside, where it’s safe. Near Armok’s love.

Someone also decided that only seven members of each squad of our militia needs to be training at any given time, which is clearly three soldiers too few.

3rd Felsite.

I seem to have spaced out for a while. The artificial lake near our front gate is dry, and I have no idea how long it’s been like that. I certainly don’t recall opening the floodgates.

15th Felsite.

In accordance with a dream Armok sent me, the purest members of the fortress have joined the Holy Order of Mook, and all taken the name Mook. They shall oversee the continued construction of LAVA.

I’ve found that we have several elf bone crossbow bolts. This pleases me, and I shall do my best to make sure they are fired from wooden crossbows.

I’ve had some dwarves with nothing better to do go through the fortress and mark all the clothes that are too big or damaged for us to wear and mark them for dumping. They claim that these clothes would be useful trade goods, but I cannot think why anyone would be interested in our worn out clothes.

20th Felsite.

The dwarves tell me that there was some sort of ambush, but it seems to have walked straight into our cage traps. We’re having a small problem with smoke coming from our burning prisoners, but it’s not spreading anywhere important.

Infinitus has started screaming that he needs certain things, but I’m not sure that’s any different from how he normally acts.

2nd Hematite.

Infinitus has finished Mostodkosh, the Shameful Slaughter. It’s a tetrahedrite toy hammer, encrusted with various valuable items, with a picture of our second monarch, Nil Tradejudged, on the side. Perhaps taking inspiration from him, the militia seems to be giving names to all their weapons and shields. Naturally, I haven’t succumbed to such foolishness.

15th Hematite.

While trying to find a clothier, I found out that every single dwarf in the fortress claims to be a carpenter, engraver and stonemason. I am genuinely baffled by this. It seems to serve no purpose other than ensuring we have inferior quality products. It seems that before I can teach these dwarves the joys of Armok’s love, I must first teach them the joys of finding a job they’re good at and krutzing sticking to it. Specialisation, people.

20th Hematite.

The elves have left us. I thought they had gone weeks ago.

25th Hematite.

Loving Armok’s Vehicle of Ascension nears completion. I’ve sent the priests of Mook to bless the device and a certain star.

1st Malachite.

It begins. LAVA and the star are fully prepared, and the Mooks have done their duty and earned their eternal reward. Now power can be channelled into the great construct.

5th Malachite.

There’s been a slight problem with LAVA. Several cats have been accidentally sacrificed to Armok.

10th Malachite.

So, there’s been another minor problem involving LAVA. Luckily, I’ve been able to avert it before it flooded half the fortress with magma by implementing MAGMA, the Minor Adjustment Giving Major Achievement.

30th Malachite.

LAVA:MAGMA is now powering up, but a completely unrelated problem is causing a wave of unhappiness in Jawmetal. I barely even sacrificed sixty Mooks, I don’t know what they’re so put out about. They don’t even seem to be satisfied with my explanation that it’s all for the glory of Armok.

In any case, now seems a good time to reveal LAVA’s purpose. Should there come a time when all seems lost, the faithful shall be gathered together in the dining room under the tombs. A lever in the bottom left hand corner shall be pulled, releasing Armok’s fiery blood to embrace the faithful, allowing them to quickly join him in his great hall beneath the magma seas. Their souls certainly won’t be trapped in an eight pointed star hidden in the fortress, allowing me to reach my true power and take over hell. Definitely not. Anyway, this serves the dual purpose of preventing our enemies making slaves of our craftsdwarves and rendering a large chunk of the fortress uninhabitable should we be unable to hold it. Given enough time, I should be able to improve that to 100% of the fortress with my LAVA:MAGMA:HELLFIRE design (Harmful but Entertaining Local Lava Filling Initiative with R Edesign), and then to the entire area around Jawmetal with the LAVA:MAGMA:HELLFIRE:IMNOTEVENPRETENDINGTOBESUBLTEANYMORE YOUREALLGOINGTOBURNALIVE

5th Galena.

Some child decided to go berserk in the middle of the militia’s training grounds. He... didn’t last long. Current count is eleven miserable, fifteen very unhappy and five unhappy. Perhaps I could have gotten away with a bigger sacrifice.

7th Galena.

A metalsmith has been striken by melancholy. Perhaps I should have warned the others of my plans before implementing them, but doubtless someone would have tried to swoop in and save the Mooks just before the magma engulfed them.

10th Galena.

NES Gamer the second has gone berserk. He’s currently duelling the rest of the Running Shadows. I’d send in the rest of the milita, but it seems like the sort of thing that should be handled by the squad themselves.

11th Galena.

Oscar the First heard NES gamer fighting, ran in and caved his head in with his war hammer. I’d be more annoyed if he hadn’t done it all in a single stroke rather than taking as long as the Running Shadows were doing. NES gamer the Third has been found.

I think I have an idea which will allow me to prevent the rest of the militia going crazy. As soon as the human merchants arrive, I’ll send every unhappy soldier to butcher them, making them happy once they’ve bathed in the blood of their foes.

13th Galena.

Viha Kirbonium keeps throwing tantrums. I might need to throw a Viha Kirbonium. Into a spike pit.

15th Galena.

Viha has gone stark raving mad. I knew I should have thrown him into the spike pit when I had the chance. My instinctive insight into the right thing to do is clearly being clouded by Armok’s influence. I need a more bloodthirsty god.

16th Galena.

Excellent! The goblins have sent us some meat bags to slice up. This should stop the militia complaining all the time.

...but of course a hammerdwarf decided to go insane in the middle of fighting someone. You just can’t find good help these days.

20th Galena.

All the goblins are dead, but the dwarves are still unhappy. I don’t know what’s wrong with them. I’ve given them death, sacrifices, murder, bloodshed, joy, laughter, smiting, maiming, injuries, and butchery. What more could they want?

21st Galena.

Yet another swordsdwarf has gone berserk. I think that once I get this sorted out, we’re going to need some new recruits. Perhaps I should cover the danger room with occult symbols before training them. In the meantime, perhaps now that the dwarves are keeping busy hauling goblin pieces to the lava they’ll stop being so upset just because I burned a few people alive.

Side note: I wonder what happens if a vampire is struck by melancholy? They can’t exactly starve themselves to death...

I’ve had a small channel dug in front of our archery targets in order to conserve bolts.

25th Galena.

Viha Kirbonium the Second has gone berserk. This may be a problem of greater magnitude than I initially thought.

26th Galena.

Viha Kirbonium the Second has been impaled on my spear. I definitely didn’t enjoy it at all. Tee hee. Since he lacks any living relatives, his heir is some random dwarf that I think I saw him talking to once.

30th Galena.

Viha Kirbonium the Third has been struck by melancholy. On the bright side, we are running out of dwarves that aren’t too emotionally scarred to be affected by all this death.

5th Limestone.

Viha Kirbonium the Fourth AND Fifth have both gone mad. I’m going to have to check if that name is just unlucky. I’ve chosen someone who seems both well balanced and used to tragedy to be their heir.

The marksdwarves don’t seem to want to shoot over a hole in the ground, so I’m getting them covered back over. I guess we’ll just have to waste a few bolts.

10th Limestone.

Viha Kirbonium the Sixth has been possessed. That’s it. I’m leaving.

5th Sandstone.

I’ve cleared a path for the caravans through the trap field. In order to make up for this, I’ve ordered the construction of some ballistae in case any invaders manage to make it through our traps. Perhaps I can test it out on some elves.

VK VI wants bones for his mysterious construction, and we don’t seem to have any. We also don’t have any animals large enough to give bones when killed, and the hunters don’t seem to be bringing back any kills. Viha Kirbonium the Seventh has been named.

10th Sandstone.

Viha Kirbonium the First has been found dehydrated to death. Viha no longer looks like a word to me.

In other news, I have grown attached to this spear of mine. I still don’t understand the way the rest of the militia fawn over their weapons and give them names, but it is a VERY nice spear. Plus there’s still dwarf blood all over it.

15th Sandstone.

Viha the Third has died.

26th Sandstone.

Viha Cirbonium the Fourth and Fifth have been found dehydrated and starved, respectively.

13th Timber.

So I was testing the ballistae out, and one of the arrows is now perched on top of a tree. Anyway, the dwarven caravans have arrived.

15th Timber.

A large force of goblins is coming from the south. I’m sending our military to meet them, and we’ll have to hope that the caravan guards can deal with the trolls.

17th Timber.

A squad of hammer goblins have gone around the militia and are currently engaging the caravan guards. I’m trying to get the dwarves closest to them to help, but they seem to want to go to their original destination before the new one, which would result in them travelling the entire width of Jawmetal before doing anything useful.

18th Timber.

The hammer goblins have been eliminated, though one of the caravan guards died in the process, and the captain of the Vigilant Hunters has several broken bones.

19th Timber.

The goblins have fled, aside from one axe goblin that is currently getting turned into a pincushion by the Shot Trouble. The wagons have survived unscathed.

20th Timber.

The wagons are now unloading. A dyer has been possessed, probably by some form of Viha Kirbonium, and is now gathering rocks.

23rd Timber.

Viha Kirbonium the Sixth has been found dead of thirst.

28th Timber

Vucar has created Athserastel Niles Éthes, a gabbro crown. It has an image of Zuntir Atticwheels admiring cheese on it. I don’t know who that is, or why he admires cheese so much. Perhaps he likes the holes?

3rd Moonstone.

The merchants are refusing to accept any offerings from Jawmetal, and I’m not entirely sure why. I gave them a very favourable deal in our trading, the goods were all made here, and they have plenty of space left in the vans.

There are also a frankly ridiculous number of dead goblins recorded in Jawmetal’s history. I can’t think why they are so determined to take the fortress, unless they want Armok’s blessings for themselves.

10th Moonstone.

LAVA:MAGMA is now fully powered, aside from a few stubborn sixes lingering about. Some of the dwarves tell me that I should have included some way to fire it at our enemies, but I can’t think why we’d want to immerse them in Armok’s love.

20th Moonstone.

Every dead dwarf in the fortress now has a slab engraved for them. In other news, Ghostbuster stock has fallen a shocking 90% in value.

30th Moonstone.

There are now no unhappy dwarves left in Jawmetal, one way or the other.

1st Opal.

So... I woke up this morning and couldn’t get out of my house. The doors are all locked and barred, and I can’t very well dig through an adamantine floor with just a spear. The guards outside my door tell me that I was actually voted out of power several months ago for reducing the population of the fortress by a third in less than an hour, and Condorito just didn’t take control because he didn’t want to deal with the miserable citizens. It doesn’t matter. Armok has shown me the way, and I have earned his favour. The others shall know that I was right all along soon enough.

I leave one hundred and forty eight dwarves alive in Jawmetal, in addition to several thousand gallons of blessed lava, a reasonably high frame rate, and thirty seven named weapons.

edited 23rd Dec '13 4:32:40 AM by Durza

Your malevolence knows no bounds. I absolutely love it – viha Kirbonium.
TuefelHundenIV Night Clerk of the Apacalypse. from Doomsday Facility Corner Store. Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
#1062: Dec 23rd 2013 at 2:36:50 AM

Nice body count.

Who watches the watchmen?
vihaKirbonium Next time I die, I get a free sundae! from Limbo City Since: May, 2013 Relationship Status: Robosexual
Next time I die, I get a free sundae!
#1063: Dec 23rd 2013 at 3:29:07 AM

I'm up to seven?! Jesus fucking christ what happened, me? [lol] Also, I can help but notice when you pick an heir who seems well balanced, they always seem to run into possession at a later time. I'm starting to think you're just really bad luck.

Anyhow, whenever VII rolls around, make him a hammer master, mix some shit up. I'm still laughing at how a great big chunk of that log is "Viha Kirbonium (insert roman numeral here) has royally lost his shit"

—-===Journal of Viha Kirbonium VII, 2 Opal===—-

Father used to tell me our family was cursed. He spoke of a malevolent evil named Durza, who constantly seemed out to kill our family's progenitor, usually through a pit trap; and I thought him to be mad. As fate would have it, he was later possessed, and run ragged. Rotpar damnit, Durza. From what I can tell, we don't have any family heirlooms; and let's face it, no one's going to willingly mate with a dwarf who's family members have a horrendously bad habit of going mad and dying... So fuck it. I'm gonna pick up a hammer and I'm gonna start crushing skulls.

If I should die of madness or possession, I request my son to change the family name, and break this miserable curse.

edited 23rd Dec '13 3:36:58 AM by vihaKirbonium

"'LEEROY, JE- *shot in the head*' - the battle cry of the Viha." — Madnessincarnate
Durza Possibly Demonic from Beigeknife Since: Dec, 2011
Possibly Demonic
#1064: Dec 23rd 2013 at 4:29:04 AM

I think Viha 7 is already a legendary axedwarf. Honestly, the first two deaths were accidental, the next three were me picking the rest of the miserable dwarves in the fortress, and the sixth was just unlucky.

edited 23rd Dec '13 4:37:43 AM by Durza

Your malevolence knows no bounds. I absolutely love it – viha Kirbonium.
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1065: Dec 23rd 2013 at 8:58:07 AM

I had it downloaded before I got to work, tonight I'll open it up, and we'll have a look-see. Wife and I have to work through Christmas, so I'll probably just play through.

So.

PULL THE LEVER, KRONK!

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1066: Dec 23rd 2013 at 5:05:02 PM

Journal of 'Condorito' Stinthadethab, Boozesmith, upon ascension to Overseer, 1st Opal, 261.

Wat.

Da.

Krutz.

Is that magma suspended over the krutzing dining hall?! Is it being held in check by a few bridges?! Where's the lever! Dismantle it immedia-nodon'ttouchit!!! None of these levers are labelled! Is this like some kind of human dance/sacrifice thing?

Is that a kiddie pool of magma?

I'm both cofused, infuritated, and terrified at the same time!

I need a drink.

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
Jinxmenow Ghosts N' Stuff Remix from everywhere you look, everywhere you look Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: Not caught up in your love affair
Ghosts N' Stuff Remix
#1067: Dec 23rd 2013 at 5:10:52 PM

Can I get involved if I've never played Dwarf Fortress before? I know what it is, I've read Boatmurdered, but still, can I join in?

edited 23rd Dec '13 5:11:12 PM by Jinxmenow

"Monsters are tragic beings. They are born too tall, too strong, too heavy. They are not evil by choice. That is their tragedy."
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1068: Dec 23rd 2013 at 5:21:13 PM

Now, how do you want to join in, exactly?

Do you want to take a turn, or do you want to be dwarf'd (have a dwarf be given your name), or what were you thinking?

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
TuefelHundenIV Night Clerk of the Apacalypse. from Doomsday Facility Corner Store. Since: Aug, 2009 Relationship Status: I'd need a PowerPoint presentation
Night Clerk of the Apacalypse.
#1069: Dec 23rd 2013 at 7:21:02 PM

If you have never played before I encourage you to learn to play before taking a turn with the fort.

Who watches the watchmen?
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1070: Dec 24th 2013 at 5:40:21 AM

Continuations of the Journal of Condorito:

I've started a project called I. D.O.N.T. W.A.N.T. T.O. L.I.V.E. I.N. A. K.R.U.T.Z.I.N.G. H.O.L.E. I.N. T.H.E. D.I.R.T. I.M G.O.N.N.A. C.L.A.S.S. T.H.E. K.R.U.T.Z. O.U.T. O.F. T.H.I.S. P.La.C.E. I'm also using the acronym to either trigger the kind of madness that ends up with a solid platinum quern, or the kind of madness that ends with a swim in the lava kiddie pool. Which I repurposed into a nice dump zone. Which anybody has yet to use. Stupid elves and their stupid wooden swords. If they didn't bring the goblins, they'd be useless.

Also, somebody went and ripped out all my glorious traps in the front. This will not do at all. Sure, caravans gave the hairy eyeball to that mass of death an doom they had to cross over, but there was always at least one suicidal donkey with a load of booze. And that's all that matters.

Also, if we're going to have a massive gaping workshop floor, and a massive gaping stockpile floor, shouldn't we move the raw materials next to the workshops? Just sayin'.

I'm going to make a decorative sporran out of the next person who comes to me with a problem.

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1071: Dec 24th 2013 at 10:18:39 PM

Continuations of the Ruminations of one Condorito, Boozesmith:

Caspellaer has named his Iron Shield Nakassodel. It literally means The Enjoyable Shield.

A dwarf once asked me, "When will you know you have enough barrels? When will you know you have enough bins?" I smacked that foo. And the foo dwarf found enlightenment.

Bladebound must have been feeling left out, because he named his iron shield Togalzefon, the Stormy Fountains.

And Spring has arrived. I'm ready to actually begin ruling. Huzzah.

edited 24th Dec '13 11:31:51 PM by Condorito

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
Journeyman Overlording the Underworld from On a throne in a vault overlooking the Wasteland Since: Nov, 2010
Overlording the Underworld
#1072: Dec 25th 2013 at 7:06:40 PM

What exactly have I (Edmond) been up to since the day I napped on the dump bridge?

vihaKirbonium Next time I die, I get a free sundae! from Limbo City Since: May, 2013 Relationship Status: Robosexual
Next time I die, I get a free sundae!
#1073: Dec 27th 2013 at 3:22:50 AM

Can't be as bad as dying in six different bodies xD

"'LEEROY, JE- *shot in the head*' - the battle cry of the Viha." — Madnessincarnate
Condorito Dorfy from Sanity Since: Oct, 2012 Relationship Status: And they all lived happily ever after <3
#1074: Dec 27th 2013 at 5:07:59 AM

tried to get the descriptions and dispositions uploaded for everybody, but the max pixels on here are little better than a thumbnail. I'll upload the images either tonight, or tomorrow.

But everybody's doing fine. I'm not building any fatality-inducing superweapons. This time.

"...An overfed, long-haired, leaping gnome..." - Eric Burdon/War
vihaKirbonium Next time I die, I get a free sundae! from Limbo City Since: May, 2013 Relationship Status: Robosexual
Next time I die, I get a free sundae!
#1075: Dec 27th 2013 at 7:01:30 AM

Aw come on, I need somethihng to give a stupidly long acronym to.

"'LEEROY, JE- *shot in the head*' - the battle cry of the Viha." — Madnessincarnate

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