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80% of the universe is made of ninjas:

Is that cake frosting?
Dark matter, as we know, constitutes more than 80% of the mass of the universe, but it is surprisingly difficult to detect — apart from gravitational effects. apparently it is silent, elusive and unseen.

You might notice that these are are the same qualities that ninjas traditionally possess.

Therefore, we can only conclude that dark matter is made of ninjas, lurking around in every corner of outer space and swooping down on Earth (or other planets) in some rare occasions.

As an aside, this easily answers Professors Foglio's Universal Ninja Puzzle.

edited 11th Oct '12 6:37:23 AM by Carciofus

But they seem to know where they are going, the ones who walk away from Omelas.

 2 Pentigan, Sat, 13th Oct '12 3:26:22 AM from Summerland Relationship Status: Complex: I'm real, she is imaginary
Fwomph
I see one flaw in your theory. You state the only way to detect Dark Matter is by it's gravitational effects, ninjas possess no such method of detection. Therefore Dark Matter is not composed of ninjas, but is in fact composed of an imperfect variety of ninja. This of course defeats the theory that Dark Matter is one of the Platonic Ideals as it is not ninjas exhibiting attributes of Dark Matter in a faded state, but Dark Matter exhibiting the attributes of ninjas in a faded state.

And thus I submit to you the following conclusion: Ninjas are one of the Platonic Ideals.
 3 Omega Shadowcry, Mon, 17th Feb '14 2:26:39 PM from ◥▶◀◤ Relationship Status: You cannot grasp the true form
JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?
Ninjas: Made of Dark Matter and Dark Energy.

Why is the universe moving away from?

Ninjas.
"The Stick has sentimental value. It's like an enormous, hideous teddy bear we can kill things with." -rikalous
 4 Maple Platoon, Wed, 26th Feb '14 5:19:21 AM from Middle of Nowhere,Canada
Time Traveling Robot without a cause
[up][up]Actually, ninjas should have mass. Otherwise there particles would fly apart. It's basic physics. Maybe.
Totally not planning to buy Ark Encounter.
 5 Frishman, Mon, 31st Mar '14 9:57:18 AM from Baton Rouge, LA Relationship Status: Too sexy for my shirt
No, ninjas have mass and therefore have detectable gravitational effects. It's just that their gravitational effects are so weak individually that it becomes nearly impossible to detect them without specialized equipment which we don't have, or by detecting the combined incompetence of several ninja at being undetectable, which results in the gravitational effects we have noticed and attributed to Dark Matter.

edited 31st Mar '14 9:57:26 AM by Frishman

"Sicherlich kann man nicht ernst sein."

"Ich bin ernst, und nennen Sie mich nicht Sichirley."
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Total posts: 5
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