Need some thoughts on a story about ghosts I'm writing. Not critique yet, even though I intend to hunt for a beta later.
Al is a medium, and has had some problems with his powers. Namely, his biological parents were terrified of him and his sister, and eventually abandoned them. Al and his sister were eventually adopted by a woman who took pity on them (didn't decide wheter she's a medium or not).
But Al's sister died, and he started to wonder why her spirit didn't stick around. Combine his childhood with people being scared of him and thinking he was creepy, and Al became a bit uneasy towards people and started to hope to meet other mediums like him, so he would feel less like a freak. He felt the need to help ghosts in trouble, though, but would always suffer after they moved on (or became wraiths due to being in the world of the living for longer than they should).
Al eventually meets a spirit named Simas. Simas would be a pain in the ass to help, because he simply forgot how he died. This because he changed his mind about not having anything to do in the world of the living at the last minute. Transferring between realms isn't unlike an update, so Simas became not unlike corrupted data. Simas and Al became fairly close.
One day, a boy named Michael appeared. Ghosts can only be seen by medium, or those they have unfinished business with. Michael told Al and Simas he never met Simas before, and both Al and Simas assumed he was a medium. A second ghost appears, and Michael starts to act uneasy. Michael lied about never having met Simas before: the two used to be friends, but had a huge fight not long before Simas drowned. Michael tried to save him, but failed.
Simas was a rather depressed person in life, mainly because he was in a position and situation not unlike Al's (but Simas had healing powers). Michael decided it would be better if Simas didn't remember his past at all, so he would be happier, unaware Simas would turn into a wraith if stayed in the world of the living for too long.
As for their personalities:
Simas: emotional, usually cheerful, can be a bit of a troll, can be a bit snarky, jumps into conclusions, really sucks at lying and dissimulating emotions.
Michael: Helpful, kind, usually cheerful (is faking, though), can be unpredictable, can be stubborn and overly emotional.
Al: Helpful, kind-hearted, comes off as a jerk but really isn't, complains a lot, tries to keep his emotions in check, tries to be strong, has an enormous abandonment complex.
Some problems with this:
- Should Michael be another medium, or he can be lying about also being able to see ghosts? If he's lying, another ghost is a part of the story, so Al and Simas would find out soon enough.
- Would it be too assholish for Michael if he were lying about being a medium?
edited 24th Sep '12 10:23:54 PM by risingdreams