TV Tropes Org

Forums

Projects: Long Term/Perpetual:
Trope Description Improvement Drive
search forum titles
google site search
Wiki Headlines
It's time for the second TV Tropes Halloween Avatar Contest, theme: cute monsters! Details and voting here.
Total posts: [1,357]  1 ... 15 16 17 18 19
20
21 22 23 24 25 ... 55

Trope Description Improvement Drive:

 476 Septimus Heap, Wed, 5th Dec '12 4:13:10 AM from Zurich, Switzerland Relationship Status: Mu
Another Wizard boy
The Backwards R is a bit too much Self Demonstrating. Can we move it to SelfDemonstrating/

 477 Fighteer, Thu, 20th Dec '12 12:12:44 PM from the Time Vortex Relationship Status: Dancing with Captain Jack Harkness
I will EXTERMINATE your unhappiness!
I fixed Sadistic Choice to present the trope first and the variations second. As written, it focused too much on the "choose one of two hostages to save" version, when it is much broader.
 478 Marq FJA, Sat, 22nd Dec '12 2:02:49 PM from Saudi Arabia Relationship Status: Shipping fictional characters
O' Allah, save Egypt
Interplay of Sex and Violence's description seriously needs expansion, because it's not clear from a first read what the trope is about.

Also, could I have some assistance with Nigh-Invulnerability's Made Of Diamond variant's entry? The part starting from the third line (boldfaced for clarity) does not clarify how it is "way, way beyond Super Toughness".

edited 25th Dec '12 8:28:26 AM by MarqFJA

Ash-shaʻb yurīd isqāṭ ḥukm al-ʻaskar
Added Alliterative Alien
Transsexual as it is right now is a bit of a mess, and has quite a few definitions on its page which, while relevant to the trope itself, are rather out of place, and don't offer much to the trope's description itself, feeling more like a Useful Notes page.

What could be done about them to help clean the description up?

 480 Septimus Heap, Fri, 28th Dec '12 8:53:14 AM from Zurich, Switzerland Relationship Status: Mu
Another Wizard boy
That page needs a lot of description moved off to Analysis/

 481 shimaspawn, Fri, 28th Dec '12 8:56:09 AM from Here and Now Relationship Status: In your bunk
Actually, that's more Useful Notes material than Analysis.
Reality is that, which when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

-Philip K. Dick
 482 videogmer 314, Fri, 4th Jan '13 4:44:34 PM from that one place Relationship Status: Who needs love when you have waffles?
The suicide prevention note on Ate His Gun seems a bit unnecessary.

 483 Slimbship 4, Fri, 4th Jan '13 9:20:01 PM from The Valley
Musically inclined
Forced Tutorial has an issue with encouraging negativity, especially the self-demonstrating bit popping up throughout the page.
The world needs more capable people. Are you?
Dragon Writer
Soldiers at the Rear could use a more focused description.
 485 Marq FJA, Sat, 5th Jan '13 5:38:41 PM from Saudi Arabia Relationship Status: Shipping fictional characters
O' Allah, save Egypt
Bubble Boy's description is taking the title and article image too literally, compared to examples like Mass Effect's Tali'Zorah. Also, as Shimaspawn had put it, "it looks very short sighted and there are serious examples in scifi all the time. It needs a rewrite and maybe a trip through image picking. Comedic examples are far rarerer than the person who wrote it assumes."

Also, Ninja really needs a chop down on its description, sending a lot of it into analysis.

PS: Currently under a temporary edit-suspension, so the most that I could do right now is to propose my takes on how to fix the problems above. I'll try doing that tomorrow; need some frickin' sleep!

edited 5th Jan '13 7:05:53 PM by MarqFJA

Ash-shaʻb yurīd isqāṭ ḥukm al-ʻaskar
 486 nrjxll, Sat, 5th Jan '13 6:39:02 PM Relationship Status: Not war
[up]I think the Bubble Boy thing might be more suited for a split than a rewrite, actually.

 487 Marq FJA, Sat, 5th Jan '13 7:06:33 PM from Saudi Arabia Relationship Status: Shipping fictional characters
O' Allah, save Egypt
<shrug> Well, that would have to wait until TRS cleans up. In the meantime, a rewrite would probably have to do.
Ash-shaʻb yurīd isqāṭ ḥukm al-ʻaskar
 488 Septimus Heap, Sun, 6th Jan '13 2:11:11 AM from Zurich, Switzerland Relationship Status: Mu
Another Wizard boy
Personally, I'd trust the rewrite of Bubble Boy to someone who is more familiar with the fictional examples, since my familiarity is mostly about the Real Life ones.

Yeah, ninja needs a huge trimming. I'll think up on that.

Opening Monologue definitely needs work; the first sentence hints towards War Was Beginning rather than the trope it really is.

 490 Marq FJA, Mon, 7th Jan '13 6:07:46 PM from Saudi Arabia Relationship Status: Shipping fictional characters
O' Allah, save Egypt
Lady in Red's description needs clarification on whether or not it's restricted to actual dresses — considering that it's applied in at least one case to a character whose only instances of wearing all-red is when she's in her Latex Space Suit — and whether the red being limited to a specific "main" piece of outerwear consistently despite wardrobe changes still counts (e.g. wearing a red jacket over otherwise changing sets of shirts/pants).
Ash-shaʻb yurīd isqāṭ ḥukm al-ʻaskar
Eating the Eye Candy is in bad need of a shorter and more clearer description. The trope is just "Female Gaze/Male Gaze presented as a character's viewpoint". That or something like that needs be said a lot early in the description.

edited 9th Jan '13 4:14:52 PM by captainpat

 492 Noaqiyeum, Wed, 9th Jan '13 4:56:12 PM from Ockham Asylum Relationship Status: Showing feelings of an almost human nature
the it-thingy
It's also currently in TRS.
Go and get your riot gear! Swing your partner all around -
We'll be dancing on the cinders as the town is burning down!
Well, the point of the trs thread is to give it a better description. Just posting it hear so it has more eyes on it.

 494 Noaqiyeum, Wed, 9th Jan '13 5:51:50 PM from Ockham Asylum Relationship Status: Showing feelings of an almost human nature
the it-thingy
Okay - I just thought it would be a bad idea if someone took it upon themselves to try to fix it up independently. :P
Go and get your riot gear! Swing your partner all around -
We'll be dancing on the cinders as the town is burning down!
All Men Are Perverts is unnecessarily long.

 496 Xtifr, Sat, 12th Jan '13 10:39:36 AM Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
World's Toughest Milkman
Percussive Maintenance takes nearly a dozen paragraphs to explain what should be a fairly straightforward notion.
"Existential Despair" is an oxymoron.
 497 Nohbody, Sat, 12th Jan '13 10:12:07 PM from Somewhere in Dixie Relationship Status: Mu
Just zis guy
It seemed to me that Percussive Maintenance got to the core idea at the start. However, it does have a lot of extra stuff that probably would better be put in Analysis, or plain old dumped in the bit bucket as trash.
 498 Septimus Heap, Sun, 13th Jan '13 1:50:22 AM from Zurich, Switzerland Relationship Status: Mu
Another Wizard boy
The first and last three lines capture the trope.

Everything else can safely be thrown to an Analysis/ page.

 499 Nohbody, Sun, 13th Jan '13 4:09:44 AM from Somewhere in Dixie Relationship Status: Mu
Just zis guy
I left a little more than [up], but I did chop out most of it and move it to the Analysis page, with a link to this discussion in the main page's edit reason.
 500 Xtifr, Sun, 13th Jan '13 2:30:10 PM Relationship Status: Having tea with Cthulhu
World's Toughest Milkman
self-thump. reading failure.

edited 13th Jan '13 2:32:58 PM by Xtifr

"Existential Despair" is an oxymoron.
Total posts: 1,357
 1 ... 15 16 17 18 19
20
21 22 23 24 25 ... 55


TV Tropes by TV Tropes Foundation, LLC is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available from thestaff@tvtropes.org.
Privacy Policy