Yes, but then we'd have to go on Yahoo Answers.
This one girl had a Mary Sue Classic in the works:
I urged her to Deconstruct the story and not portray the protagonist so perfectly:
Secondly, why doesn't the celebrity return the girl to her aunt? That would be the more sensible course of action than taking someone in who you don't know. And, for that matter, why doesn't the story show more sympathy with the aunt? Isn't she worried?
This story could be interesting, so long as you don't portray your protagonist as a paragon of virtue. Because she isn't. Judging from your premise, she's reckless (leaving her home without making arrangements for food and shelter), stubborn (trying to convert others to her way of thinking), and a bit manipulative (concealing the fact that she is dying from the actress). Show her to be so. Have others call her out on it. Have her be wrong because of it, and have her change, too, instead of just the actress.
Got a link to this? I need to share so more people can laugh at it!
My name is Addy. Please call me that instead of my username.Aww, don't be mean like that! Every good author has done some crap work in their past, and it's all about moving beyond that and improving.
I write pretty good fanfiction, sometimes.It's just like C Me Dance! Does Satan then show up to thwart her converting plans?
The result?
There comes a point where I'm not sure a work can be saved, much less that it should be. I have job/wife/ownwritings so at some point I simply have to cut my losses.
This applies to Yahoo Answers in general at this point, much less most of the work on it.
Nous restons ici.Wasn't trying to be mean; I was trying to salvage the story, as it seemed it was headed straight down the tubes. Of course, it was probably going to wind up as her Old Shame, as my Mary Sue Classic now is, but she'll never get better if she doesn't get criticism.
Another plot that, while not Mary Sue, is a bit of a Cliché Storm:
I urged the author to put a twist on the story to make it fresh, and warned that it would seem cliche without it:
Some twists:
- The boy is a pacifist. He wants to be a nurse, too, but he's being pushed into the army by overconservative parents, or drafted.
- One of them has a secret fetish, and is unfulfilled without a partner who will be open to it. The other character is the only one who knows.
- They both share an interest/obsession with some topic, which becomes a motif in the story.
- Also, it's kind of a gender stereotype that the female romantic lead will have trouble trusting after abuse, and the male will have trouble committing after a bunch of shallow flings. Maybe you could flip that on its head. Make the male character the abused one who can't trust, and the female the one who has shallow flings.
- One or both of them has autism or asperger's, which makes understanding and relating to people hard for them.
edited 31st Jul '11 6:18:36 PM by LeighSabio
"All pain is a punishment, and every punishment is inflicted for love as much as for justice." — Joseph De Maistre.You weren't being mean, you're pretty much the only person being polite. Keep it up.
edited 31st Jul '11 6:20:29 PM by Five_X
I write pretty good fanfiction, sometimes.I am a Christian and I agree that was a Mary Sue can I help?
Make your hearth shine through the darkest night; let it transform hate into kindness, evil into justice, and loneliness into love.
In the Books and Authors section, there are many wannabe authors asking if their stories are good. I reckon they could use some help from the tropers.
"All pain is a punishment, and every punishment is inflicted for love as much as for justice." — Joseph De Maistre.