Having someone come on to you (esp. someone of the same sex)

So how do you tropers feel when this happens? Do you have the same reaction all the time, or does it depend on the comer-on's attractiveness and their ability in carrying it over? Because some people can be really awkward about this, going for you when you're in a huge room full of people who can identify you and gossip about anything you do. One's got to think of one's reputation, it really isn't a trivial matter! Not to mention there's some basic stuff like making your target feel comfortable around you physically, make them earn your affection, etc. etc. Isn't it depressing when an otherwise interesting person blows it up on such trivialities?

edited 19th Mar '11 6:21:56 PM by Ardiente

Yes, it sucks that this is the case for some really great people that can't make a good come-on and their targets. For all our talk about how humans are the greatest social animals in the world, the reality of the situation is that we weren't really made to engage each other perfectly.

I don't think I've ever had this happen, really. Good thing too because it would be massively awkward.

It happened to me once. Creepy as hell.

I don't know; I was probably drunk.

It's only ever happened to me once. I just said I had a bus to catch and walked off.

I'm pretty sure the drag queen in question was intentionally trying to bother me though.

It Worked.

Actually, wait, this has happened to me, volunteering at a coffee van. Except the guy was a creepy guy who said things like that to all the female volunteers, so it was pretty easy to shrug it off. And even if it hadn't been, I would have been able to hide behind my badge.

I've had this happen to me from both male and female people. It's awkward in both cases, bur males add this terror dimension of "even supposing I like you, what am I supposed to do about it in front of so many people, haven't you ever heard of subtlety.

I have also inflicted this on many, many girls in my ignorant years. Those girls, I knew for a fact that they liked me. And I blew it up, again and again.

Then there's people like Blaine who manage to be smoothly seductive without even trying or noticing (actually the one time he was actually trying... Well, actually that vid is very topical, so I'll post it. There's this boy, Blaine, who is in a choir, and he's gay, and Valentine's day was close and he had a crush on a male junior manager at the local GAP (who also happens to be gay and who he had had friendly chats at the coffee shop a couple of times), and he got the club to help him go serenade him... and the result is the most hilariously awkward thing ever. Also it was an Epic Fail, since that got the guy fired:

Seriously, that's actionable, criminal self-sabotage right there.

edited 19th Mar '11 6:57:20 PM by Ardiente

If a did was hitting on me, I'd politely tell him "thanks for the compliment, but I'm straight. Flattered, though."

I mean hell it's a compliment. Maybe not from someone I'd want to fuck, but a compliment nonetheless.

Never had this happen offline, but I enjoy turning people down regardless.

You do? I usually feel rather guilty, like I owe them something even though Ï know I don't.

Well, it's more difficult to enjoy if it's someone I have known for a while, but if the person is a stranger I get more of a kick out of it.

That's kinda messed up to get a kick outta shooting people down. It's one thing to turn someone down; another to enjoy it.

Then again I'm a man who's ONLY been shot down. Ah well, life ain't got me down yet.

Well, I'm a little messed up then.

Hey whatever makes you happy, I'm just saying I view that in a dim light.

Oh, I get it. In fact, it'd be the perfect chance to sing this song:

"I get no kick out of you", with a big smile, "so please GTFO".

edited 19th Mar '11 8:36:03 PM by Ardiente

@Mark I understand completely, I've been turned down too. Alas, one can't say yes to everyone.

I'm not the sort to lead people on and then turn them down, mind you; I like saying no from the get-go.

I said "Yeah, sure. Whatever." and wound up going down on her. Not bad.

Well that I can respect. I've always thought a flat no from the outset is better than false hope.

@Mark Agreed.

Thirded.

I thought this thread was going to be a lot more gross.

edited 19th Mar '11 9:43:54 PM by joeyjojo

I too wasn't quite sure I was using the right idiom.

I was, right?

Someone of the same gender:

1. Shock and panic
2. Then blushing
3. Then shuddering at the thought
4. Then Humiliation
5. Then ego prodding at how popular I am
6. Followed by shame

Someone of different gender:

1. Shock and panic
2. Then blushing
3. Then shuddering at the thought
4. Then Humiliation
5. Then ego prodding at how popular I am
6. Followed by shame

Hm, oddly similar.

If it were my crush though, then a different reaction would result:

1. Shock
2. Bliss
3. Happiness!

I hope it happens, from the bottom of my heart. I just hope she's still around when I get back to class. I've been gone for almost a week because of my illness.