Ruin the above power

You accidentally cut someone with your vision.

The power of hydrokinesis.

only works with your urine

ability to turn into SCP-682

edited 19th Sep '12 6:59:50 AM by WaitDidIDoThat

You'd be stuck in existence forever, right down to the cell, and even if you were at a point where you wanted to die, you never, ever could.

The ability to shoot subservient bees from your hands.

You can't create matter, and all those bees are produced from your flesh and blood. Just one swarm gets rid of your hands entirely. Also they're subservient but not intelligent enough to distinguish you from things to sting. And all they want to do is build a hive, anyway, not randomly sacrifice their lives to sting people.

The power to summon delicious grapes from the grape dimension, in any location.

edited 19th Sep '12 9:22:14 AM by Anomalocaris20

The grapes are sour.

Super Weight class 7 IRL

Reality itself becomes a triviality to you, shallow in its mutability and ephemeral upon your whim. Simple pleasures give way to intellectual pleasures, storytelling, devising puzzles on a grandiose scale, which give way in turn to simply stimulating your brain to experience pleasure constantly. Pleasure becomes pointless. You begin to experiment with joy, with fear, with despair, with surprise.

Surprising yourself proves increasingly difficult. You consider rewriting yourself, to improve your imagination, to forget or selectively ignore things you've prepared for yourself, or even alter entirely the kinds of stories you prefer to tell, just to switch things up. You are apprehensive about this for a long time, as you have already perfected yourself in your own eyes and question the transition in identity that would occur. Apprehension is a delightful feeling for a while but eventually gives way to further ennui, without satisfactorily answering the question for yourself.

Your first change is to give yourself confidence in whether or not your identity remains intact. After all, making yourself feel pleasure by default was a step in this direction in the first place. And you can't know whether or not you've already done this anyway, and even if your identity is somehow subsumed or eradicated in the process it's not as if you could be unsatisfied. And so you change. Now the games are about yourself - you are the protagonist, and the antagonist, and the trickster, and ultimately as the game goes on all the shallow side characters and mooks as well, as you put yourself in increasingly convoluted casts and situations to at least temporarily alleviate your own entropic malcontent.

The process is endless - timeless, really. You can do everything, and so you do - out of desperation to find something that is not maya.

Mortality.

You die. If you are unlucky, very soon due to things like illness or accident.

The power to instantly and controlledly conjure up well-made cake anywhere.

It is consistantly the wrong kind of cake for the situation. You need a delicious cake? Too bad. You get a gluten-free, vegan cake. You need a cake for a child's birthday party? Too bad. You get a boob cake (like what you can get at any erotic bakery).

The power to make anything funny.

You have no control over the power. Things that should not be funny are made funny. After attending a funeral, you are branded "a colossal jackass". This is also hilarious, somehow.

Projection Magic (see Archer and Shirou of Fate Stay Night for an example).

You can only "project" bad movies.

Awesome rap skills.

You can only rap in nonexistant languages.

Touch typing

You can only type in Armenien.

Being an Omniglot.

You have no fingers.

The power to go to bed.

You can never get back up.

The power to never get ninjaed in forums.

Despite being in bed, you cannot sleep. You are instead distracted by a billion other things, such as all the myriad ways that this power could be ruined more effectively.

Well, this is ironic. Instead of being ninja'd, you gain uncontrollable precognition so you are instead reverse-ninja'd every time you post. Every one of your forum posts is immediately before the one that it is responding to, without fail.

The power to be wherever you have to be, whenever you have to be there.

edited 3rd Oct '12 12:27:55 AM by CompletelyNormalGuy

You are, however, always completely inappropriately dressed.

The power to kill a yak, from two hundred yards away. WITH MIND BULLETS!

It only works on yaks. Also they explode causing huge collateral damage.

ability to speak any language.

While you can speak any language, you cannot understand any language. Sure you know what you're saying, but you have no idea how people are responding.

The ability to shoot pretzels from your fingertips.

You soak up some of the sodium each time you fire. Can you say "hypertension"?

Any gun you wield gains Bottomless Magazines.

All guns you use also turn into nerf guns. Good for nerf games, only hilarious when the big bad arrives in his humongous mecha.

Ability to eat ice cream without brain freeze like 2/3 of people.

edited 3rd Oct '12 2:04:42 AM by Jusamies

You do not experience the pain of brain freeze. However, all you've done is remove the pain sensation, not the cause of the pain; you end up eating too much ice cream and suffer brain damage as a result.

The power to transform anything into a doorstop.

It only works on little wooden wedges and extremely lengthy books.

Technomancy.

You live in 12th century B.C.

indestructable left arm.

Your right arm is incredibly frail.

The power to give great speeches and relate with people.

It's called charisma. Which, as far as abilities go, isn't really all that special.

You can send any non-living object you touch to a personal pocket dimension, and retrieve it instantly with a click of your fingers.