I've had sex before dating someone, during dating someone, and after dating someone. Then again, I don't attach a lot of emotional significance to sex other than "it's a lot of fun", so it's completely possible for me to sleep with a friend without it ever going past a friendship.
Of course, I'm probably in the minority here, and I do try to make sure the guys understand how I feel about them before any sex happens.
"I don't know how I do it. I'm like the Mr. Bean of sex." -Drunkscriblerian
Sierra 117
The movie portrayal of sex the night of the first date seems like a case of accelerated movie time, along the lines of falling in love with someone you just met.
The Mod with the Migraine
Hmm ... the first girlfriend I had sex with was a week after we started dating. The second was the first date. My wife and I had sex on the second date, which was the day after the first date.
However, with all three of them, I knew them for several months (up to several years) before we started dating. That might make a difference.
That’s the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw
Street Writing Man
Mine go all over the time map, so I'm not sure I can be much help here. Generally, I knew them for a few months before sex happened, but there have been a few that I met that night and ended up with.
Then again, Like DG I don't attach a lot of emotional context to sex by default. It can be there, but it isn't automatically there as far as I'm concerned.
If I were to write some of the strange things that come under my eyes they would not be believed. ~Cora M. Strayer~
NOT THE BEES
Just to throw an outlier into this, my sister dated a guy for about three years before breaking it off with him because he was pressuring her for sex in the first place, then dated her husband for about five years before they got married — not sure when they started, but I get the feeling it was around year four.
I know Everybody Has Lots Of Sex is a discredited trope, given that the Kinsey Institute says 4-6 partners is a more average numberKeep in mind where I come from, that's not a discredit at all; it's proof.
edited 25th Jan '11 2:24:14 PM by Pykrete
To throw another outlier, my best friend was dating her boyfriend for about a year and four months before they started having sex. She didn't have to say anything. The way she suddenly started comparing everything good on this earth to sex was telling enough. ![[lol]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/lol2v12_4863.png "[lol]"){kind=small}
Mine go all over the time map, so I'm not sure I can be much help here. Generally, I knew them for a few months before sex happened, but there have been a few that I met that night and ended up with.I don't know what you're talking about. >__>
"I don't know how I do it. I'm like the Mr. Bean of sex." -Drunkscriblerian
Lost in Space
Outlier: I was a virgin at 24 before I met my future wife. We dated for something like six months before I got up the courage to have sex with her, which she'd been offering for quite some time. She had four previous partners, all of whom she'd known for some time before actively dating.
"It's Occam's Shuriken! If the answer is elusive, never rule out ninjas!"
In Riastrad
Another unabashed sex-isn't-emotional hedonist here.
Several of my friends have been "friends with benefits", as the saying goes, without becoming anything other than just that; close friends who happen to screw when they feel frisky.
However, on the counter side, I don't pressure anyone into anything, ever, so how long it takes my mates is a wild number. Ashley took almost a year, Haley took three months or so, and Shelly was ready to jump after about a week. (Relevant: Shelly's slightly nympho, so yeah.)
EDIT: Just noticed that everyone I've ever dated had a name ending in Y. Very odd.
edited 25th Jan '11 2:53:41 PM by Diamonnes
My name is Cu Chulainn. Beside the raging sea I am left to moan. Sorrow I am, for I brought down my only son.
Everyone likes talking about sex in anonymous venues, so:
I know Everybody Has Lots of Sex is a discredited trope, given that the Kinsey Institute says 4-6 partners is a more average number (although I don't know whether that includes everyone you've ever hooked up with, or just steady partners).
But here's what I'm curious about: How long do people generally date before having sex? The movie portrayal of sex the night of the first date seems like a case of accelerated movie time, along the lines of falling in love with someone you just met. But then, I don't really have anyone except myself to judge by. Therefore, I am asking you to share your experiences.