Crazy Teachers

Hoo boy. Well, we have my middle school health teacher. He once put his chair on top of his desk, shoved a tissue into his nose, and taught like that for about ten minutes. And in order to demonstrate how blood cells move through veins and arteries... he jumped out of the fucking window.

Then we have my current English teacher. His craziness is more of an Informed Attribute. Apparently, when he worked at a Catholic school, he managed to get a NUN to drop the F-bomb on him. He says he deserved it, but he won't tell us exactly how. Also, he threw a stapler at someone last year. (The student in question reportedly kept saying "You won't do it!". He took it as a challenge.).

edited 10th Mar '11 5:50:16 PM by Parakus

[DATA EXPUNGED] - I would NEVER do that to a kitten! -Dr. █████

I know it may be late to post this. There is this sub teacher I've met called Mister Schwertfeger. He is married to this very nice lady who left our school back in October. I asked her what is first name is and she replied she can't pronounce it. Mister Schwertfeger has this thick German accent, is fond of giving people death glares, doesn't let us call him Mister S and once chased and picked up a tiny 8th grader because she wasn't playing soccer. My dad says he sounds like a teacher who should be on South Park.

Seeing all these piss ant tropers trying to talk tough makes me laugh. If Matrix were here, he'd laugh too.

I had an English teacher in my Sophomore and Junior years of high school that was pretty good. He was stern when needed, but our last assignment was probably the best. We studied archetypes by going through the entirety of Avatar The Last Airbender. Then after we got done, we cosplayed as characters (my costume was horrible :P) and after we got done with that we watched The Big Bang Theory for the rest of the year.

That is the face of a man who just ate a kitten. Raw.

I just found out my music professor did the music for The Book Of Pooh, Bear In The Big Blue House, and Pepper Ann.

Insert witty and clever quip here. My page, as the database hates my handle.

My chemistry/physics teacher in high school was formerly an Army demolitions expert, and was working on his masters in forensic evidence while teaching. So we did awesome things like bake cookies to study endothermic reactions, and blow up model rockets to study momentum. The year after I graduated he took a year off of teaching to go do field work in Bosnia excavating the mass graves.

My English teacher junior year was an utter dick, though. Unless you were a member in one of the three clubs he ran, you would not get an A on any assignment. Ever. He was fired after that year of teaching, and eventually went on to teach at Reno university.

My fencing professor at UNLV was Russian, and had in fact trained the Russian Olympic fencers for the 1980 (or maybe 1984) Olympics, and moved to the US soon as he could. He was Crazy Awesome, and frequently would take on two or three students from the advanced fencing class at the same time. Half the class dropped out because he expected us to put in more time than the listed class hours.

My professor for Political Science and American History never assigned homework, but instead gave a ten question quiz at the start of every single class. Cumulatively, those quizzes were 60% of our grade, so there was one guy who was always late, missed every one, and then failed. She also had some lovely anecdotes about how sexist the Poli Sci department at UC Berkeley was when she went there back in the 50's.

I had a private teacher for violin and viola lessons, who was older than my mom but smoking. One day while at her house for a lesson, two Mormon missionaries came to the door, and since she was on the phone, I answered it. While I was trying politely to make them go away, she came to the door, and then introduced me as her boyfriend*

. Cue rapid retreat.

That’s the epitome of privilege right there, not considering armed nazis a threat to your life. - Silasw

My humanities teacher in middle school.

Wasn't so much that he was personally strange, just a little... dull.

I remember my sister telling me about a game her class invented called "Beet Bingo" (Mr Beet being the name of the teacher), where everytime he said one of his key words like "Ok", or referenced himself in the third person, you'd make a mark down or something.

But yeah, still the only teacher to dissuade me from History, and the only teacher I've had to reference themselves in third person.

"You'd never do something as irrational as dying."

Another candidate would be my high school Social Studies teacher - we had homework, reading assignments, and tests, but other than that, very little work was actually done in class. On a typical day, we'd listen to oldies radio for a while, then he'd tell jokes and have conversations with students until class ended, then maybe at the last minute we'd be given reading or homework. I got this joke from him - another example would be the time he went to the blackboard and wrote "FIRETRUCK" on it, first writing the "F", then writing the "K" at the end and working his way backwards. He then told us that we could go home and tell our parents that he used a word that started with "F" and ended with "UCK" in class. We weren't actually learning anything that had to do with firetrucks, he just did it for the sake of the joke.

edited 12th Dec '12 11:43:36 AM by MikeK

Earth is the only planet inhabitable by Nicolas Cage.

• One of my Geometry teachers had a variety of weird vocal tics, brought his 4 parakeets into school and drank a large Pepsi every day. He would also put Calvin And Hobbes and Pearls Before Swine strips on our exams and tests.
• One if my Spanish teachers told us of his intention to read 50 Shades of Grey. "Just to see what it was like." He would also go on long existential rants occasionally, he was awesome.
• Another one of my art teachers was basically the definition of Hippie Teacher. He rode his bike around the class room once, gave us a 5 minute lesson on Canadian accents, put on a Woodstock documentary which had both severe profanity and repeated drug references just because he 'liked the music'
• One of my math teachers gave a motivation speech to a friend which cumulated with the phrase "Fuck. You. All." Made even more amusing due to the fact he was very soft spoken usually.

edited 11th Feb '13 5:12:11 PM by TheMuse