I attempt a Vine Swing and crash into a tree. While I'm stunned from the impact, an enormous anaconda constricts me and swallows me whole.
The next poster is attempting to swat a 
I have seen the amateur, and it is me.
Its thousand-strong kin swarm me like a flock of angry Cuccos and eat my flesh.
The next poster is booked for a handicap match against the Bullet Club.
I hope you get tiny bits of eggshell in all your omelettes for the rest of your life!
I enter the wrong Bullet Club and get shot to death.
TNP just saw someone put Pineapple on their Pizza.
Oh, Crap! It's 1987 and I'm at Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria! (crunch)
The next poster did a Blind Shoulder Toss and hit That Poor Cat.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Sir Night, Wayward Hunter-Angel
Oh, so Video Game Cruelty Punishment exists here? ...Crap. I am mauled by a Giant Karmic Mutant Lion.
TNP is undergoing the final ritual that will mark them a winner of the Roguelike.
What rises must fall, what falls may rise again.
Light and Hope
The ritual instead summons an Eldritch Abomination that swallowed me whole.
The next poster is conducting a concert.
Hope: "Let's go. We'll be together." Lightning: "I only know... that soon, we'll be together."
He'll take the case!
Two violinists get into a fight halfway through and in my attempt to break them up, one of them accidentally stabs me through the heart with their violin bow.
TNP is at a skate park.
Word's second most famous attorney with a bird-related name.I am Squashed Flat by a parade of skaters.
The next poster is trying to install a lightbulb.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Blitzy....
I fall down from the ladder, break the lighbulb , and get my throat damaged by broken glass.
TNP is at an arcade.
Just made a server on discord.Come join me.
Sir Night, Wayward Hunter-Angel
Should have checked the Deadly Game advertisement. I am killed in the preliminary rounds of Extreme Electrocution Fighting Tourney.
TNP is competing in a dodgeball match.
What rises must fall, what falls may rise again.
Light and Hope
The ball hits me on the head with a VERY powerful strike, breaking my skull.
TNP is watching Finding Nemo.
Hope: "Let's go. We'll be together." Lightning: "I only know... that soon, we'll be together."
It made me think sharks were friendly, so i went scubadiving. I was wrong. Very very wrong.
TNP is a Mary Sue
...
The fic I'm in is forgotten forever, trapping me in an And I Must Scream limbo state.
TNP is near someone who is disguised.
...
He'll take the case!
Said person turns out to be Agent 47. I am promptly garroted and hidden in a dumpster.
TNP is sightseeing in the Serengeti.
Word's second most famous attorney with a bird-related name.
I have seen the amateur, and it is me.
I get trampled by a herd of wildebeests.
The next poster is attending a Justin Beaver concert (that's Beaver, not Bieber).
I hope you get tiny bits of eggshell in all your omelettes for the rest of your life!
Whether Beaver or Bieber, the same result happens. My ears implode and my head follows suit.
TNP is drinking at a bar with the Demoman from Team Fortress 2.
edited 6th Jun '18 7:33:40 PM by Jaxfirebus
Not Sherlock Holmes
I die of alcohol abuse.
TNP is watching Who Killed Captain Alex?.
“Now! Let us engage in the art of deduction!”
Surprise tiwst: I was Captain Alex. And dead, as the title implies.
Never saw it, sorry.
TNP is riding a ceiling fan.
The ceiling fan falls off the ceiling, bringing me with it. Then it falls down the stairs with me for good measure. Every single bone in my body is broken.
The next poster is making tinfoil hats.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
I have seen the amateur, and it is me.
Turns out those alien mind control beams are real, and the tinfoil hat does nothing to protect me from the Sectoid menace, and my head asplode.
The next poster is the third wheel in a Love Triangle.
I hope you get tiny bits of eggshell in all your omelettes for the rest of your life!It's a Vampire-Werewolf Love Triangle and the werewolf is a yandere. After an epic Fur Against Fang battle, I'm Impaled with Extreme Prejudice on a Wooden Stake.
The next poster attempted a Flirtatious Smack on the Ass.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Not Sherlock Holmes
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
Could you stop using the same prompts? It's getting annoying.
Sorry. Here's a new one.
The next poster encounters a mysterious old grandmotherly figure.
If not for this anchor I'd be dancing between the stars. At least I can try to write better vampire stories than Twilight.
Light and Hope
It turns out the "grandmother" is actually Shang Tsung, who steals my soul.
TNP encounters Master Xehanort.
edited 21st Jun '18 12:30:38 AM by dave_the_assassin
Hope: "Let's go. We'll be together." Lightning: "I only know... that soon, we'll be together."
I step on a loose sewer grate and fall to my death.
TNP is exploring the Amazon Rainforest.
Word's second most famous attorney with a bird-related name.