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What An Idiot / Bar Rescue

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Jon Taffer: When I talk to idiots, I get loud!

In general:

  • A failing bar is hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and is losing thousands a month. The owner has called on a consultant and experts to help the place get back on its feet again.
    You'd Expect: The owners who have called on Jon Taffer for help to follow his directions after his rescue so that the bar can be successful in the long run. At the very worst, if the owner and staff don't agree with the remodeling decisions in mind, they can think about a theme that works for them while also keeping the rest of Taffer's advice in mind.
    Instead: A few owners go back to their old ways completely when Taffer leaves, with disastrous consequences.
  • Many of the rescues Taffer does involve owners who have had zero previous experience managing bars.
    You'd Expect: The owners to act fast the moment they start losing money and to adapt to the changing environments and trends.
    Instead: They keep the same old theme and the same old drinks which drive new customers away. By doing this, they ignore the elephant in the room until they're hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and are months away from closing.
  • After the bar owners do make the call...
    You'd Expect: Said owner to pull his staff together and at least make the bar look presentable when Taffer and his experts arrive. They may be in debt but, as Taffer has mentioned in the past, cleaning the bar doesn't cost all that much and may make the place more inviting for people.
    Instead: Most of the owners do no such thing. When Taffer and his experts arrive for the initial recon, it looks clear that the bar and/or kitchen haven't been cleaned in months and some even risk health code violations. Taffer demands a thorough cleaning of the bar and everyone wastes a day that could have been used for training them effectively.

Specific:

  • BlackLight District Bar's owner Dave deserves a special mention when the show reaches the point where Taffer remodels the bar.
    You'd Expect: Dave to appreciate Taffer's generosity, and remember that someone who has rescued over 100 bars and runs a highly successful hospitality industry consulting firm that's helped hundreds of other businesses likely knows what he's talking about.
    Instead: Dave makes it clear to Taffer during filming that he only intended to use the show for the free remodeling, upgrades, and publicity. Everything else, including any theme changes, themed cocktails, and management advice was going to be tossed right out the door behind Taffer the second he left. When Taffer makes it clear he isn't going to bother wasting his and the Bar Rescue crew's time and effort if it's just going to be discarded, Dave chooses to tell Taffer to get out. And Dave does so while insulting Taffer's intelligence and questioning what Taffer knows about the business. Dave's bar kept its history of negative reviews on travel websites, and eventually closed in 2018. Gee, wonder who's the expert? Even after the bar shutdown, Dave maintains a Never My Fault attitude and claims it was just haters and fans of the show looking to bash the bar for being a music venue. From an update found by a fansite of the show, quoted directly from a Facebook post:
  • Dave actually gets a second mention for his reaction to longtime Vandals bassist Joe Escalante's warnings about basing a bar around punk music: Escalante pointed out that while he personally loves punk, it isn't a popular enough music genre to keep a bar in business by itself, an opinion that is seconded by Taffer.
    You'd Expect: Dave to acknowledge Escalante's knowledge of the music industry and alter his business plan to include punk as one element of a more varied musical climate.
    Instead: Dave mocks Escalante's "grandpa sweater" and acts like he knows more about punk music than a man who's spent decades in one of the most renowned punk bands ever.
  • During Taffer's recon at O'Face, one of the customers asks co-owner Matt about the bar's signature "O-Gasm" shot. Specifically, what's in it.
    You'd Expect: Matt to just give her a quick list of what kinds of alcohol are used in the drink, and possibly some rough percentages to go along with it.
    Instead: Apparently afraid that the customer is trying to steal one of their recipes, Matt refuses to tell her anything. Jon explains that it can cause overconsumption and is irresponsible. The customer subsequently refuses to buy the shot.
    It Gets Worse: The recon of the above bar is cut short when a manager attacks a server in the parking lot, prompting Taffer and his mixology expert to intervene. An enraged Taffer demands that Matt and his wife Karen fire the manager, threatening to abandon the rescue if they fail to do so.
    You'd Expect: That Matt and Karen would comply, not only because of all the trouble they presumably went to in order to get Taffer's help, but because, as Taffer points out, the manager's an assault lawsuit waiting to happen.
    Instead: Out of favoritism for the manager, Matt and Karen decide to fire the server, claiming that she bought it on herself. Taffer is as good as his word, and ditches them, only returning when Matt and Karen see sense and lay off the manager. The whole business ends up wasting the time that Taffer and his experts could have spent helping the staff.
    To Make Matters Worse: The manager is rehired after Taffer abandons the rescue. Furthermore, they fire the security official for refusing to commit a Destination Defenestration on another employee and also for actually being receptive to Taffer's attempts to help.
  • Worth a special mention are owners who fire employees who are cancer to the business during the episode, then rehire them shortly thereafter. Chix On Dix/Power Strip has one such instance where the manager has a rebellious dancer (who constantly drinks on the clock) and a worthless talent coordinator.
    You'd Expect: The manager to find a different dancer and talent coordinator after Taffer cajoles him into firing them.
    Instead: He rehires both of them after Taffer leaves. The manager reveals that he wound up with even fewer customers than before the rescue... and is left wondering why.
  • Similarly, the owner of Weber's has a thieving bartender.
    You'd Expect: Said bartender to be fired immediately.
    Instead: The owner never does until he faces pressure from Taffer and every other employee in the building. At the end of the episode, the epilogue reveals that the bar is still struggling and that said bartender was rehired.
  • As part of the rescue of Stand Up Scottsdale, Taffer has a brand new green room built for the convenience of the comedians, at the expense of losing 60 of the comedy club's seats. A follow-up episode reveals that the owner, Howard Hughes, was none too happy with this, prompting him to get rid of the green room.
    You'd Expect: That if Howard was insistent on getting rid of the green room, he'd at least have the sense to replace the 60 seats that were there before it was added.
    Instead: He puts a DJ booth in one half of the room and uses the other half for storage. Taffer lampshades the stupidity of it magnificently:
    Jon: This is a bad joke. Howard has turned an A-list quality green room into a junk drawer! [to Howard] I'm an asshole because I took away your 60 seats, [to live audience] then he turned it into a closet and never got the 60 seats anyway! [to Howard] Why would you get rid of that so the comedians don't have it, you don't have the seats OR the green room?!
  • One of the most infamous examples is Piratz Tavern which insisted on relying on its pirate theme to draw in customers, calling it the ultimate "Peter Pan fantasy" because the owner once hosted a successful pirate party during her previous career in finance. They invested so much into the overblown theme, even walking around in full pirate cosplay, accents, and all that the quality of the food and drink suffered heavily for it, and it only isolated them as they were right in the middle of a heavily corporate section of Maryland.
    You'd Expect: The owner to understand that - after racking up a whopping $900,000 in debts and being forced to sell off her house and live in her parents' basement with her husband and daughter - the pirate theme was not a feasible venture, and that she'd embrace Jon's proposal for a more contemporary, business-friendly atmosphere.
    Instead: She insisted "it was not her enemy" and remained unwilling to implement any of the changes recommended by Jon. She eventually realizes the truth, but this is quickly followed up by a server badmouthing Jon's ideas, prompting a brief but volatile exchange that sees the server storm out in the face of the criticism.
    To Make Matters Worse: The night of the bar's relaunch as The Corporate Bar and Grill, the owner and her husband remain hostile to the new theme and even its menu even as the restaurant is fully packed for business and receives glowing feedback not just from the customers, but their own servers! Barely a week later, she reverts it back to Piratz Tavern. To add insult to injury, she and her staff held a bonfire destroying the new restaurant's sign and posted a video of the event in which they insult Jon Taffer at length for his efforts. Surprise surprise, Piratz continued to sink deeper into debt and was eventually forced to close permanently.
    Jon: It’s disrespectful and insulting that they would burn down all the tools I gave them. In all my years as a bar consultant, I’ve come up against people who challenged my ideas, but Piratz Tavern is the only one who outright threw ’em in the trash!
  • In "Thugs With Mugs", Jon Taffer reveals the bar was selling cheap liquor brands in premium bottles, most of whom are thugs the owner invited in.
    You'd Expect: The owner would try to defuse the situation with an apology or offer to refund people's orders. It would make their financial situation worse, but it would salvage their reputation somewhat.
    Instead: He tells a guy who demands a refund to "Shut the fuck up", escalating the incident to a full-on riot.
  • In "The Sound of Failing Music", a bartender accidentally drops a glass in an ice bin and has to get blue curaçao, which was left by the owner in another room.
    You'd Expect: She'd cover the ice bin and tell everyone behind the bar about her mistake so no one uses the ice bin till the problem is resolved.
    Instead: She tells nobody and the bar owner, thinking the guest (Ami from ZanZBar) hasn't been served yet nearly scoops ice from the bin. The only thing that saved Ami was he was standing right next to the ice bin so he saw what was going on.
  • Radio/Artful Dodger from "Bug Bite" does an 18 and over night (the presence of this sort of thing is for another entry) and Jon Taffer does the Stress Test with these conditions to show how such a promotion will fail despite the best efforts to ensure no one under 21 gets a drink.
    You'd Expect: The underage patrons to notice the unsubtle camera crew in the building as soon as they walk in and be on their best behavior or leave.
    Instead: They get drinks illegally and are shocked that the camera crew caught them.
    As A Result: They end up trying to steal the cameras to delete the footage but end up being restrained or failing due to being plastered and in heels.
  • The owners are far from blameless either. While Jon Taffer points out there is no way to safely ensure a successful 18-and-over night, they came up with the closest thing possible by putting purple wristbands on those 21 and over and black X's on the hands of those under 21.
    You'd Expect: They would use a Sharpie or some other permanent marker. It may be inconvenient for the guest,but their liquor license is worth more than that.
    Instead: They use a water-soluble marker.
    As A Result: Jon sets a trap by having a legal-age patron pose as underage, and she's easily able to wash the X's off in the bathroom and get a drink. She even points out that underage patrons surely do this all the time.
  • Not even Jon Taffer is immune to this. At "Second Base" he goes in to chew out Garry for slacking off and putting his remodel to waste. The bartenders immediately jump to Garry's defense and insist he's doing the best he can with the resources Terry is giving him, which is none, and he feels no reason in doing small things like dusting the light fixtures if he's not given money for big things like fixing the Kegerator.
    You'd Expect: Jon Taffer to put two and two together since Terry said earlier that he doesn't know his staff's name and feel that the accusations may be true.
    Instead: Jon continues to throw Garry under the bus and embarrass him in front of the customers and only looks like a bigger jerk the next day when he finds evidence that Terry really wasn't putting money into the bar.
  • Not as catastrophic as the others, but this one is worth an entry. KC's Neighborhood Bar & Grill is a members-only bar, which is a concept that can work if done correctly. The place even has a bouncer to check for membership. Jon's recon team that night, however, aren't members.
    You'd Expect: That the bouncer would tell them how to become a member, and, if they're still not interested, say he can't let them in but politely tell them the offer is always open if they ever change their minds.
    Instead: He apologetically tells them he can't let them in without a membership, thereby not only making membership difficult but making them feel unwelcome in the bar and unlikely to return.
  • In "Life's a Beach" Sean, who previously owned the Sandbar, enjoyed a successful business at first, but eventually landed in such horrible debt that he lost his home, and had no other form of income. He reaches out to an investment company later on, which costs him his ownership, and reduced him to a manager. This doesn't keep him from claiming to be the owner.
    You'd Expect: That he would understand that the investment company was only there to give him loans until he can pay his debts off.
    Instead: He treats these loans as handouts to bail him out.
    As a Result: To say the least, he earns the ire of everyone around him, especially Mike, the head of the investment company.
    You'd Also Expect: Given the seriousness of the situation, Sean would do everything he can to help himself.
    Instead: He sits in his office feeling sorry for himself and making excuses.
    That's Not All: When Sean's experience in bartending is called into question, he tries to justify his lack thereof by saying he doesn't drink.
    As Such: Amy, the mixologist, teaches him how to make a drink, and he learns surprisingly quickly, all things considered. When she asks why he didn't learn before, he has no response. Mike tells her that Sean would rather just keep spending his money.
    Later On: Soon before the bar opens, Mike is sitting outside, at his wit's end with Sean's repeated failures at paying back his loans, ready to fire him. He also admits to being angry with himself for letting it go on so long. Jon convinces him to let Sean perform in a stress test and see if that changes his mind.
    Come the Stress Test: The bar is divided in half by tape, with Sean and one bartender on one side, and Kenny, another manager along with another bartender, on the other. Kenny has his bartender's back the whole time and is doling out drinks left and right. Meanwhile, Sean is waiting tables, collecting orders from multiple tables at once, and leaving his bartender in the weeds. Jon has to hunt him down to help his bartender. When he does go to the bar, he fumbles with the very same drink that Amy taught him how to make earlier that day.
    Ultimately: Mike's patience runs out, and he pulls Sean away to fire him. Mike tries to let him down easy, but Sean continues to piss him off with excuses, believing that he was intentionally put at a disadvantage. It takes Jon stepping in to get Sean to finally leave. To rub salt in the wound one last time, Mike apologizes to the rest of the employees for not firing Sean much sooner.
  • In "Arnold's Lounge" a worker named Marc acts irresponsibly to the point that the owner, Philip, has no choice to fire him. Marc then quits in response.
    You'd Expect: Even if Marc thinks he's being unfair, he'd recognize that it's the owner's business and has a right to permit who he wants on his business and leave, even if for no reason than just to not make himself look like a jerk on camera.
    Instead: In an act as disgraceful as Kevin from "Fairways", he stubbornly refuses to leave, while the cameras are still running nonetheless, despite having just quit.
    As A Result: Marc has the cops called on him and narrowly avoids being arrested for trespassing thereby ruining any possibility of being given a second chance like Julio from Natalie's and other potential employers can see how he acted on camera.

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