"The height of two men, the weight of four, the strength of sixteen! Sir Boris, finest swordsman in the World! And his brother, Sir Morris...not the finest swordsman in the world! But the most enthusiastic! And their noble pets, Sir Horace the dog, and Sir Doris the Hamster. The Big Knights!"
"FOR BORODZO, AND BOROVIAAA"!!
—The Big Knights
The Big Knights was a 2000/2001 children's BBC series about the exploits of two knights doing heroic deeds in a fantasy Kingdom of Borovia. The pilot appeared in December, 1999. The show ran for thirteen ten-minute episodes before being cancelled.The distant lands of Borovia are threatened by dragons, witches and ogres. It is up to two mighty heroes, Sir Boris and Sir Morris, to ride in and defeat these evil monsters, rescue the Princesses, and restore order to the Kingdom. Unfortunately, these two chivalric brothers happen to be as stupid as they are strong, resulting in numerous mishaps and extraordinary amounts of collateral damage as they attempt to perform good deeds.Humour is derived from the setting (Borovia is not actually in The Middle Ages but in the The 20th Century and extremely backwards) and from the various disasters caused by the Big Knights. Oh, and it has BRIAN BLESSED providing the voice of Sir Morris.
The Series provides examples of:
Bedsheet Ladder: Used to escape from the castle of the princesses' aunties. Sir Morris neglects to tie his on to anything.
Big Eater: Sir Doris the hamster is this — Sir Boris irately claims it's because she's too stupid to ever realise she's full. There's an episode where she accidentally gets swallowed by a dragon and devours the ridiculously huge amount of food in its belly, forcing it to go rampaging across the kingdom to try and sate itself — but it can't, because Sir Doris eats everything it swallows.
Blood Knight: The Big Knights don't care much who or why they fight but they sure enjoy it.
Brick Joke: King Otto continuously jokes about the unlikelyhood of a meteorite destroying his brand new hydro-electric dam. The camera keeps cutting away to a meteorite approaching planet earth, with ominous music playing. The meteorite completely misses the dam, but then Sir Morris accidently launches himself into orbit and falls back down into the side of the dam, destroying it.
Curb Stompbattle: The Big Knights versus pretty much anything is usually this. Except for the troll at the toll bridge, who beats them. Though they are very good natured about losing.
Distaff Counterpart: Aunts Lily and Iris. They're at least somewhat smarter than the Big Knights, but otherwise just like them; just as big, just as strong, just as fearless (they grow Man Eating Plants in their garden even bigger than the wild ones seen in the episode), and just as boisterous (when one of the princesses apologies for a quiet burp, one of the Aunts practically blows them both away with a belch to demonstrate what a "real burp" is).
Empathic Environment: Often. It is perpetually stormy in the Land of the Vampires, right up until the Vampires are all destroyed. Then the country becomes a sunny, tourist location.
Enhanced on DVD: The studio went above-and-beyond to put out the DVD/Blu Ray, digging the source computer files out of their archives and re-rendering the whole show in high definition, restoring the intended widescreen framing and fixing some animation glitches.
Manchild: Sir Morris is extremely na´ve, believing fairy tales to be real, or that food simply appears on the plate by magic (instead of being prepared by their housekeeper). He also likes Sir Boris to read him bedtime stories.
Man-Eating Plant: They grow wild in some of Borovia's forests, and King Otto's sisters grow them in their garden as well.
Meaningful Name: The Big Knights, who live in Castle Big, on the edge of Forest Big.
Perpetual Poverty: The larder is often bare. And what wealth the Big Knights had accumulated, Sir Morris gave away in exchange for a magic bean.
Royals Who Actually Do Something: King Otto begrudgingly attempts to visit his people, open a hydro-electric dam, orders construction of a power plant, and orders acts of espionage to be carried out against the neighbouring country.
Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: The Big Knights travel to the past to warn themselves not to visit Professor Von Proton's loboratory. On being told, their past selves immediately go and do just that.
Schizo Tech: Borovia has 20th century amenities like telephones and television, but the state is still fuedal and the army rely on medieval weapons and castles.
Ultimate Job Security: The Big Knights may cause severe problems (sometimes on a national scale), however they almost always get away with it. This is purely because they happen to be the only people able to rectify the problems they have caused (though not without causing even more damage on the side).
Underdogs Never Lose: Averted. The Big Knights always win at sports, much to the irritation of the normal people of Borodzo.
Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist: Both of the Big Knights, who are oblivious to the damage they do, and also King Otto, who is pompous, cuts corners for money and does not care about his subjects.
Vampire Vords: Although everyone else has similarly vague, central European accents.