"This comic started as an attempt to make pornography. It degenerated into sex comedy pretty much immediately. Even so, there are some things depicted that are best kept away from children and work. Please click on the button below to certify you're over 18. Of course, if you are under 18, you can't legally certify anything. So if you're a minor, please get a parent to click the button which says you aren't. Thank you. (Taking moral advice from cartoon characters is probably a bad idea.)"
— opening disclaimer
Oglaf is a very well-drawn and often seriously NSFW webcomic by Trudy Cooper and Doug Bayne. Most of the episodes (called "stories") are single non-sequential pages, though some stretch out longer; the very first one was eight pages long. The comic started out as a gag-a-week work, but slowly started including longer Story Arcs, most of the time focusing on Ivan and his never-ending torment at the hands of Mistress and Sandoval, the Ambassador of Xoan.(Just a note: Click "Next page" to see the next page of a story. "Next story" to see the next story. "Epilogue" to see epilogues. The last page of each story (and epilogue) has a small diagonal cutout at the bottom right-hand corner.)Most strips are very, very NSFW. So many that the strips that are work-safe are the ones slapped with a warning label. However, the comic also features many gags that are quite innocuous or just "immature". The comic features creative character design, excellent artwork, inventive jokes (SFW or otherwise), and is definitely worth a look if you are over 18 and nowhere near your workplace.Recurring characters include (but aren't limited to):
Mistress: A cruel dictator, usually busy either ruling her nation or finding new ways to torture her slaves. When she's not doing either, she torments Ivan for giggles.
Ivan: Mistress' sorcery apprentice and the ostensible protagonist. Not allowed to have sex (or even wank) under castle regulations. To make sure he doesn't get distracted from that rule, Mistress cursed him with walking, talking semen. As of 5/22/11, in a magicalsleep.
Cumsprite: The walking, talking semen. Its job is to run to Mistress and tattle whenever released. Notably, a Cumsprite is conjured from his semen whenever he ejaculates, whether by masturbation or not.
Sandoval: The Ambassador of Xoan. Staying with Mistress as a political guest, he sexually harasses Ivan whenever he's bored. He also seems to be sexually attracted to food, especially desserts.
Oglaf: A farm boy. The Chosen One, although chosen for what, we're not sure.
Ponce de Leon & assistant: Two adventurers in search of the Fountain of Youth. They haven't been seen since the Fountain of Girl incident.
The Snow Queen: The personification of Winter. Satisfying her is necessary for Winter to end and for Spring to start. Greir gladly takes up the challenge. invoked
Kronar, Son of Man: A Barbarian with serious honor.
Vanka: Female thief. Exceptionally clever and light-fingered. One half of a Battle Couple with a male thief.
Navaan: Female vampire. Captures Ivan in Vanorva with the intent to kill him, but soon finds him useful for...other things. Is now a "doctor".
The Dwarves: Three little men with bad teeth, limited fukken vocabularies, and lunatic enthusiasm for creating bizarre and fukken awesome magical items.
Because the site has a SFW "Do you really want to see this content?" page, this page will have indirect links to NSFW content. (So much of it's NSFW that, in accordance with the site's preferred style of warning, we'll warn for the pages that are actually worksafe.)
Alt Text: Please note that each strip has not only an ALT text but also a TITLE text, both different. Which one you see when mousing over it is dependent on your browser — Google Chrome, for example, shows the Alt. Text. Only for the first few comics (which possibly didn't have Alt. Text) does the Title Text show up.
A Man Is Not a Virgin: Averted with Ivan, if only because the in-universe definition of 'virgin' is fairly strict. To the residents of Vanorva, who are all virgins, he's "the slut" and consequently the hero of some hilariously improbable fanfiction.
Amazon Brigade: The Mistress' castle is entirely staffed by female guards in revealing outfits.
The Baroness: The Mistress is definitely a Sexpot, but depending on who you are (i.e. a very straight guy), her intentions might be nasty, placing her under the Rosa Klebb variety.
Beware the Silly Ones: Just when you begin to think Mistress rules through nothing more than sexual deviance, odd devices, and a lot of willing retainers, this happens..
Biggus Dickus: Subverted here. The fair maiden in question seems relieved rather than disappointed.
When Ivan refuses to go for the offered antidote and instead threatens to tell everyone that Sandoval poisoned him in "Premature Requiem", Sandoval sees this as romantic and offers him a locket as evidence instead. In "Infffirmary", we see two other patients showing similar symptoms to Ivan's, clutching lockets. Busy night, ambassador?
Ivan's tattletale jizz turned into one on at least two occasions.
On a third occasion, Navaan is disappointed when someone else's fails to do so.
Characterization Marches On: Greir's thing now appears to be that she hates fun, and doesn't seem to understand the concept. But in her earlier appearances, particularly "Meltwater," she clearly had at least some idea what it was.
Cerebus Syndrome: Oglaf has always had re-occurring characters and some gags built on top of previous ones, but as time has gone by the strips involving Ivan in particular have shifted into gradually longer multi-week arcs, which put him in ever more dire situations. Often still funny, but also part of longer and more serious stories.
The Cutie: The Snow Queen. Especially here (warning: page is SFW)
A Date with Rosie Palms: Ivan the Apprentice, constantly, even though for the longest time he was forbidden even this. He managed to find a way to beat the system though. Oglaf may be the only thing that's not American Pie that managed to turn it into an important recurring plot point.
Double Standard Rape: Female on Male: Well, most of the characters seem to think so. Of course, most of the characters are horrible people by any standards.
Everyone Calls Him Barkeep: The Mistress is known only by her title. Ivan is generally referred to as "apprentice," and Sandoval is usually just called "the Xoan Ambassador".
Played with in the strips dedicated to Ponce de Leon's search for said fountain with his dowdy assistant. They eventually do find a magical fountain, only to realize too late it's actually the Fountain of Girl (mild nudity). Well, at least they were young that way too...
There might also be a Fountain of Doubt (SFW), though they're not sure.
Genius Ditz: Navaan. She is perceptive enough to notice things such as disguised statues and is even able to understand specifically how to deal with a severed immortal's head without lungs despite believing that the function of a doctor is to "solve mysteries." First link is SFW.
God Guise: The malevolent god worshipped by the fools' cult is an inversion; a real god disguised as a fake god according to one of its followers. It looks like a bunch of people in a lousy costume when it's actually a very real and very dangerous deity. An immortal warrior found this out the hard way and lost her sword and everything below her neck for her troubles.
Horny Devils: Mistress's pair of captive succubi. It's not (yet) known what they would do if she ever unchained them. One of Ivan's duties is to oil their naked bodies twice a day.
The Ambassador has made several advances towards the Apprentice, who definitely prefers women. This seems not to bother the Ambassador at all.
The bounty huntress Greir seems to be ladies-only, but has been hit on at least twice by men (one a shapeshifter who quickly and awkwardly attempts to rectify the situation).
The Informant: Ivan's curse is that his semen comes to life and runs to tell the Mistress what he's been doing.
Just Like Robin Hood: Parodied here. He steals from the rich, all right, and he kinda gives it to the poor, but his methods of distribution are a bit unorthodox.
Logic Bomb: A simple one, but then the dwarves aren't the most sophisticated creatures around.
Love Letter Lunacy: The Apprentice here started receiving odd love letters from anonymous sources, who in some cases weren't even sure of his gender. The notes quickly got rather more ridiculous.
Memetic Sex God : The protagonist of this strip becomes one In-Universe, thanks to a magic amulet.
Mind Control: Probably more examples in the archives, but in Frog 2, a woman is "cursed to be a slut" by a witch. A very forward thinking witch, it seems — when the traditional kiss-to-cure trick is tried by a local maiden, it turns out its a case of Viral Transformation, too.
Morton's Fork: The Ambassador tricks the Apprentice into eating a poisoned cake then offers him to suck the antidote off his penis. Turns out the antidote was poison too. Refusing doesn't save the Apprentice any suffering in the end.
Orifice Evacuation: Ivan's semen turns into a Cumsprite whenever he ejaculates. After being so cursed, he manages to get fellatio. The predictable happens, but the woman declares it to be adorable. Then averted: He comes within seconds of being able to talk himself into getting a second round of anal, although it's not the cumsprite that breaks the deal.
Out with a Bang: One of the more unusual plays on this you're likely to find - Ivan's spooges end their "lives" by splashing on (so far) a woman's face or breasts.
Plot with Porn: Word Of God is that the comic started out as an attempt to make pornography, until it "degenerated into sex comedy pretty much immediately."
Progressively Prettier: Ivan evolved from being a goofy looking comical character in the beginning to a genuinely hot pretty boy with ever-so curly hair. Though how much of this is Progressively Prettier and how much is simply Art Evolution is unclear.
Protagonist Title Fallacy: Oglaf is simply one of many recurring side characters. If there's a protagonist, it's Ivan.
Rule of Funny: Although most episodes are NSFW, the gratuitous nudity and sex plays second fiddle to this.
The Reveal: The Funpire is none other than Navaan, an actual vampire. The Funpire, in turn, faces another reveal: not all blowjobs are adorable like Ivan's cumsprites.
Scheherezade Gambit: Deconstructed here (SFW). (Apparently if you leave the Sultan in suspense, he might do the same to you.)
Schmuck Bait: Subverted in Blue Door (mild swearing) and in Book of Love. Played straight and lampshaded in Glove. It should be noted that the schmuck in all three examples is the same guy, although he only falls for it the third time. And even then, he was pretty sure it was a trap from the start.
Serial Escalation: In-Universe in this comic, two warriors in a bar make BadassBoasts on how they will defeat a monster while handicapping themselves, each one more outrageous than the last. It gets to the point that the monster arrives to terrorize the bar and finds everyone inside dead from cutting themselves and everyone there apart to fulfill their bravado.
Shaggy Dog Story: Several, particularly the whole arc that starts with "Shaft" and seems to end in "Wake" on the words "stupid f'ing town". Justice/Atonement is another example.
Too Kinky to Torture: Ivan — at least, Navaan seems to think so. You have to wonder how her other victims reacted to the threat of sexual intercourse with a hot woman...
Considering that the entire city is populated with virgins who are terrified at even the possibility that someone sexually promiscuous might be running about, Navaan probably expected such threats to elicit a somewhat more fearful reaction.
Twincest: The first sign that the "Felicia" hallucination is beginning to break down is when Ivan sees that his hot wife has given birth to two fully-grown twins who are making out with each other.
Viewers Are Geniuses: What do you mean you don't get the joke in Salome? How did you not know that the biblical Salome's dance convinced Herod to behead John the Baptist, and that in Oscar Wilde's adaptation of the story she kisses his decapitated head?
Not to mention Scherazade's occasional appearance.
Virgin Sacrifice: Navaan has been sending virgins "out" of Vanorva to be eaten by her fellow vampires. It's not clear whether the victims have to be virgins or if virgins are just the easiest prey.
The religious order in "Lapis Lazuli." When Vanka comes to plunder their idol, she's clever enough to deflower her attackers before making off with her prize.
Visual Pun/Multiple Reference Pun: Sandoval's funeral outfit includes a bundle of sticks on his head; i.e. a faggot. Sandoval is gay. It's also mourning wood.
She's about to torture a man in a way so horrible once you understand that it's a good thing when her pet falcon incinerates him with its laser eyes. Although this prompts her to sell the bird.
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