"hai plz. this game has no instructions plz. plz go right. plz." -the entire tutorial
In I Don't Even Game
, a Web Game
on lawlolawl.com, you are a nameless, genderless, cartoonishly drawn
kid bent on buying a cup of lemonade. To do this, you must take a dangerous journey through Cloudcuckooland
full of puzzles, ninjas, and a buttload of Leet Lingo
. Be warned, however, for there is no turning back. Literally. The controls won't let you.
I Don't Even Game contains examples of:
- Art Shift: Sort of. Almost immediately after the nuclear core level, the background changes from solid white to a grassy, full-color meadow. With a lemonade stand.
- But Thou Must: There is no way to avoid dropping your key in the grate the first time.
- Subverted the second time you obtain a key... or, in this case, four of them. When you go up to the grate, your character automatically stops.
- Chekhovs Gun: The A key and the Q key. When you come across the door in Level 5, you press the A key to open it. You do the same in Level 30, where you can't see the door. Also, you press the Q key to drop the purse bomb early in the game, the baby a bit later, and finally to receive your lemonade at the end.
- Chekhov's News: The Egg Media weather report.
- Classic Cheat Code: Timothy the Ghost asks to know the 30 Lives Code, i.e., the Konami Code.
- Cloudcuckooland: The world that this game takes place in comes complete with spikies, evul monsters that look like octopi, and flying fish.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Everybody. Literally.
- Endless Level: Lampshaded, then subverted at the last minute. In the same level.
- "i is beginning to think that this place goes on 4ever."
- Thankfully, after 8 times running through the same level, you get to move on. Phew.
- Fission Mailed: In Level 71, you are sent back to what appears to be the very first level. But you find out that it wasn't really the first level once you leave it.
- Obviously Evil: The ghost king. All of his dialogue suggests this. For example: "joo cannot control!joo can not control!!!1!!!!11one!" And yes, that is exactly how he says it.
- Heroic Mime: The player character does not talk. At all.
- Hopeless Boss Fight: Try as you might, it's impossible to outrun Timothy the ghost racer. Don't worry, he lets you go anyway, if you can tell him the "30 lives code".
- Humble Goal: The player risks being enslaved by scientists, eaten by monsters, and murdered by pirates... for a cup of lemonade. In fact, the achievement for beating the game at least once is named "Sweet Lemonade".
- Item Get: Lemonade get!
- Literal-Minded: You have to be this in order to win. In Level 5, one of the many examples, when the door says that "joo need A key, not AN key", you have to press the actual A key.
- Running Gag: Egg Media, which you can witness a total of three times in one game. In fact, there is an achievement for doing so.
- Stepford Smiler: The player character never. Stops. Smiling. Even when he/she's being attecked by a monster.