Wall Bangers: Video Games
"My face turns beet red, I throw the controller against the ground and start swearin', 'Fucking game long chains. Swear to NEVER play a shooter game again.'"
In Video Games
, Wall Bangers
are often also Game Breakers
, and are sometimes called "Controller Smashers" or "Screen Smashers" for the impulses a gamer on the receiving end of a Wall Banger gets. They are particularly frustrating here because video games are all about giving the player control; that makes it significantly worse when the player is railroaded
into doing something completely stupid
See also Gameplay and Story Segregation
(and subtropes like Cutscene Power to the Max
and Insurmountable Waist-Height Fence
) for more examples that make players angry.
Game mechanics are not Wall Bangers, if you see one listed here, please delete it. Go to Scrappy Mechanic instead.
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- In Wing Commander III, a fairly popular character Hobbes turns out to be a traitor. Many players view this as a Wall Banger, particularly if they played the PC version of the game. The scene with him explaining the reason for his treason was cut from the PC version, due to space limitations on PC CDs at the time. The console versions of the game had a scene explaining it, not being so limited.
- The book ''Freedom Flight'' foreshadows this, if somewhat subtly, with the opening scene being a test of the identity overlay, makes the rationale a lot more clear. Even without said book, he had his reasons for fighting alongside Confed, but the events at the time of WC3 were not part of the deal...
- It's also a bit disheartening, as Hobbes was the first indication that not all Kilrathi are bad (for Blair as well as the player), and to think that he only defected because of an established identity undermines the whole idea behind him.
- This is also a case of They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot. By that point in the game Conded intends to blow up Kilrathi home planet - in fact, Hobbes' betrayal was what allowed Kilrathi to take out the more reliable of the two human Planet Killer weapons - and if anything can be a solid, dramatically appropriate reason for switching sides, this is. Identity overlay crap seems like a cop-out meant to eliminate any shadows of grey from the situation.
- Chalk it up to the George Lucas Effect: as Chris Roberts gained more control over the series, he began to purge more and more of the nuance from the setting and replace it with blatantly transparent allegories for historical events. Wing Commander IV is the video game champion of They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot—the hype promised the ability to choose between fighting for Confed or The Border Worlds, each side with their own merits and flaws to create an interesting story. In the end, it turned out that the Border Worlds were completely in the right and the whole war was due to an evil conspiracy within the Confederation, led by Admiral Tolwyn, who was newly divested of any of the redeeming qualities he had in the previous games. Then the Nephilim, who seemed intentionally designed to be utterly impossible to empathize with, were introduced. This trend culminated in The Movie, which was so utterly atrocious that it served as a Franchise Killer for the whole series, and featured such absurdities as Kilrathi fighters dive bombing the Confederation Navy's fleet headquarters in a scene ripped straight out of Pearl Harbor!
- Vivisector: Beast Inside has two kinds of enemies: human soldiers and cybernetically enhanced animals. Even after you switch sides from the humans to the animals after your XO murders a comrade to gain your cooperation, you're still having to fight both. The reason given? You're not authorized to be on the island (and your XO conveniently never clears you, even though he's the one who wanted you on the island, in the first place), making you fair game for the human soldiers, and the animals are programmed to see humans as the enemy, no matter what. That, my friend, was the sound of a genuine headdesk. Here's some aspirin for the pain.
- In a case of this trope meeting They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot, God of War: Chains of Olympus has the basic premise of the sun god Helios going missing and Morpheus, god of dreams, taking over the pantheon and terrorizing the world in his absence. Instead of building on it, it's ditched halfway through the game, where it's revealed Persephone, wife of Hades, had the Titan Atlas kidnap Helios so he could use the sun god's power to topple the column that held the world up and kill everyone, including the pantheon. Her reason: she was sick of being stuck in a loveless marriage and pissed at both Hades and Zeus for tricking her into it in the first place, and felt The End of the World as We Know It was the best way to put her out of her misery and give the two gods the middle finger.
- Doesn't mean that they weren't stupid for missing out on capitalizing on the Morpheus subplot. The fact that his takeover of the pantheon during Helios' absence is only given brief mention, you only fight his warriors in one level, and he runs off like a little girl without a fight once Helios comes back makes the setup for him as the Big Bad even more of a Wall Banger.
- Another case would be the promotional material for the game, which strongly implied Kratos would at some point have The War Sequence with Morpheus' army. No such scene exists in-game.
- Consider this. At the end of God of War II, Kratos basically has the power to travel back in time and change the past. Now, think about his past and how much he hates all of the unspeakable atrocities he has committed. He has the power to change his past now, and doesn't use it. Obviously that would end the franchise, but still.
- The end of Neverwinter Nights 2: Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies. The blow is softened if taken with the expansion, when more information is given.
- While Neverwinter Nights 2 tries to rectify the rather glaring problems with the original's alignment shifts (such as having literally no way of shifting alignment across half the axes), it does seem to go over the top on some, and stride brazenly into Wall Banger territory on others. And while dealing with a City Watchman who looks like he may be about to accept a bribe, one dialog option results in shifting the PC's alignment one point towards chaotic and then immediately shifting it back one point towards lawful without any interceding input.
- The first first game's original campaign had several issues with the plot as well:
- Aribeth spends two acts with the Informed Ability of heroic butt-kicking (we only ever see her in two fights, and one of them's against us, in the entire game), making her The Paladin Who Doesn't Do Anything.
- And every NPC was carrying the Idiot Ball throughout. Especially in the first chapter with their complete inability to get the slightest bit suspicious about the obvious traitor.
- In Minecraft, loading the launcher just to get an error message stating your graphic card isn't supported certainly counts as one.
- It increases when you try to update it and "its already up to date".
- At some point, Notch tweeted that he would add the ability to make fried potato-based snacks to the game, but couldn't because he didn't know whether they should be called "Chips", "Fries", or "Crisps", and whether they would be the long or flat kind. Except that Minecraft has multiple translations, including both American and British English, so the name thing shouldn't even be a problem. Because of that, Minecraft players have one less item in the game.
- Ultima IX: If the fact that it's barely playable and crashes regularly unless you apply a fan-made patch doesn't make you want to shove your head through the nearest wall, the gaping plot holes and inconsistencies with its previous 8 games will.
- There's also the Guardian's "true nature": Avatar's "evil side" separated from him when he became the Avatar of Virtues. Considering that the Avatar is very much capable of doing evil things in all his adventures since his entitlement, and in Pagan he's required to do morally questionable things, this doesn't make sense on any level. This makes it impossible for the Avatar to directly harm the Guardian without the damage being reflected to himself, but not vice versa. Never mind that the "reveal" of his true nature painfully contradicts everything told or suggested about the Guardian in all 4 previous games he appears in.
- Another issue is the Avatar's lobotomy. "Blackthorn! I should have known you were behind this!" Uh, yes, you should have, since you were told that literally half an hour into the game, at the end of the tutorial. In fact, the Avatar should have been surprised that Blackthorn was even alive given that Serpent Isle has books detailing how Blackthorn died on Serpent Isle after repenting the sins he committed in Ultima V.
- There's also a large error that is summed up in three words. "What's a paladin?" This is coming from the Avatar, who was good friends with a paladin, and knows what they are. In fact, a lot of the expository questions the Avatar asks, such as what are gargoyles or what the Codex of Wisdom is are considered Wallbangers because they are a complete insult to the entire Ultima franchise, completely out of character for the Avatar, and are only there just in case someone new to the Ultima franchise picked it up.
- And let's not forget the summoning of Pyros, the God of Fire from Pagan, another dimension! How the hell is the Avatar able to summon a god who he killed in the previous game, a god whos essence he then proceded to absorb into himself, a god who no longer has any traces of his body left?! Whatever was left of Pyros was inside of the Avatar! The Avatar killed him Deader Than Dead! This however was a case of Troubled Production since it was originally intended for the Slasher of Veils to be summoned instead of Pyros, but this fact does little to soften the blow.
- To add to that Shamino clearly states that in order to defeat Lord British's sealing ritual that's preventing access to the Stygian Abyss, you have to summon a powerful creature native to the Abyss. Then Malchir tells you that summoning Pyros will work, which presents another problem with this point: Pyros is not a native of the Abyss at all, he's a god from Pagan, another realm entirely. So really, summoning Pyros should not have been able to open the Abyss, his being dead aside. At least in the original storyline, the Slasher of Veils actually was native to the Abyss.
- And then there is the begining of the game. In the end of Pagan, the Avatar had become the Titan of Ether, basicly a god of magic, but arrived too late to Britannia and saw it all taken over by the Guardian, who had basicly turned the whole place into his personal Mordor. In the begining of Ultima 9, The avatar wakes up on Earth, has none of his magical powers from Pagan left or any items from that place either, has the lowest stats possible (including intelligence,wich you probably have noticed wile playing this game), is unable to cast nearly any magic and has no clue that the Guardian has messed up Britannia! In fact, Brtiannia looks nothing the way it did at the end of Pagan! And to further add insult to injury, not even Lord British is entirely sure what evil has been unleashed in Britannia when he has an orb that can see the entrance to the Guardians gargantuan new lair!
- In Half-Life 2, Gordon's dumb move in the Citadel: getting into the capture-coffin twice was pretty wall-bangeresque. Wouldn't a trapped elevator or something have worked just as well, plotwise?
Dr. Breen: That moron. He climbed willingly into what is essentially a steel coffin.
Henderson: A steel coffin that can't be opened from the inside, and we control where it goes.
Dr. Breen: Then it's over. Sheez, that was easy.
- And, in at least the first case, you can get into the coffin going the other way, which within seconds, takes you to a beam that kills you instantly. It's a bit strange that they don't have more security checkpoints with that kind of trap.
- There's also the part about how the field mysteriously powers up the Gravity Gun, although it's more forgivable since the part after it gets powered up is one of the best parts of the game. And it's, again, lampshaded in Concerned.
- Command & Conquer 4: Tiberian Twilight. The whole thing. The sad thing is, EA was actually doing all right. C&C3 and Red Alert 3 were both good titles. So what the hell happened? Nearly all of the good plot bits from all the previous Tiberium games were dropped (including but not limited to no Scrin, no LEGION or Marked of Kane, no Forgotten, and the removal of all allusions to the Abrahamic religions from which Nod originally got its name) in favor of a half-assed plot about GDI and Nod uniting for little reason, and then getting into a civil war. The plot changes Kane from a Badass Magnificent Bastard to a God-Mode Sue trying to save humanity. All of the wars from the first three games were made totally pointless as a result, and the whole game fucks up what mystery and supernatural presence the Brotherhood of Nod had. And no matter who you pick, you more or less get the same ending: The GDI leader is killed, the Non-Entity General player character dies opening a Scrin portal, and Kane and Nod get away with nearly destroying the planet three times over AND calling down an alien invasion, by "Ascending" through the portal. This makes the end of the Tiberium storyline all the more bitter and all the less sweet.
- The Indigo Prophecy (a.k.a. Fahrenheit) started off as a really fun adventure game in which you play as both a man wanted for murder and the cops who are on his trail. About 3/4ths into the game, however, the main character and his girlfriend both die off-screen, he becomes undead (she's not as lucky) and gains Neo-like powers, and fights both a sorcerer and the holographic avatar of the Internet. "Holographic" in this case meant "Invisible, and half-covered in yellow post-it notes".
- And that's not even the worst of it: Suddenly, two of the game's player characters decide they're madly in love with each other and decide to bonk each other's brains out, just in case the world ends tomorrow. Yeah, totally not awkward at all. Also, one of the aforementioned player characters is a reanimated corpse. The other comments about how cold he is, but isn't bothered at all. And how the hell does he get an erection if he not longer has blood flowing through his veins? There is even a further Wallbanger here because, despite being a walking corpse, he is still able to father a kid!
- The indie game Aquaria has a perfectly satisfying normal ending, but going to the trouble of retrieving all of Naija's lost memories gets you to the secret ending, where it turns out her mother, Mia, had set up the entire plot of the game to turn Naija into a living weapon that she could later possess and control. This struck many players as not only being incredibly frustrating, but as being dangerously close to a bad Evil Plan or Deus ex Machina setup, giving it Wall Banger status in many people's minds.
- The Wall Banger status for quite a few people was the sudden and inexplicable addition of a love interest halfway through the game, which came right the fark out of nowhere and took over the entire last half of the plot. Many of those same folks agree with Naija's mother when she babbles on about 'spending the rest of your life burping babies'.
- Extra Wall Bangery is that this secret ending is used to set up a sequel that may never come about since the two guys who made up Bit Blot dissolved the label and went their separate ways to work on other projects.
- For Mercenaries 2, the developers hadn't fixed the "falling 5 feet gives you damage" bug. Thats just lazy.
- Star Wars: Galaxies. Started as a great idea, but Sony VERY quickly turned the game into one massive wall banger.
- Three words: New Game Enhancements.
- Particularly idiotic is the role Jedi play in the game. When it got released initially, there were no Jedi characters that you could play, which was keeping in canon, the game being set in original trilogy's timeline, thought you could become a Jedi through a VERY long series of finding random crap. Then the expansion gets released, which makes Jedi an available class from the start, leading to thousands of players dumping their old characters and restarting as Jedi. Not only does this completely take a shit all over the established canon of the series, it also pissed off players who had completed the associated Fetch Quest to be Jedi pre-expansion.
- It was a pendulum overswing. In the initial release, it took nearly two MONTHS for the first person to complete the absolutely and completely hidden requirements to unlock their "Force Sensitive" stat. Several people had already accused the game of lying and that there was no way to make a Jedi. They went too far, agreed, and now it can't be taken back.
- Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance: why in the bloody hell would Dracula's castle have a room that you can decorate however you want?! What's the point of it, if the castle crumbles to dust each time you kill its master? And isn't Juste supposed to be worrying about killing Dracula more than interior decorating?
- The plot of Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia is the epitome of a Shoot the Shaggy Dog story. Yeah, it's a pretty decent game, but what's the point if the plot makes it more of a Gaiden Game than those rendered Canon Discontinuity?
- The overall plot of Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin is highly annoying. Monster ass-pulls and Retcon about the Vampire Killer whip for some reason devouring lifeforce - considering the ORIGINS of it in Lament of Innocence, what in the blue Jesus cookies is that about? WHY would it do this? Also, the bizarre and needless redesign of Eric Lecarde, the fact that he and Johnny/Jon Morris die offscreen, and that absurd Nostradamus business... Also, why didn't John tell his son about the drawbacks of the whip? Jonathan might not have been as resentful of him if he did. But no, he opted to keep Jonathan Locked Out of the Loop, and made his best friend promise to do the same. What the hell John?!
- Those radio plays. They are worse than bad fanfiction. The veteran voice cast is gone, replaced by a new crew who range from decent-if-strange (Mamoru 'Riku' Miyano as Alucard?) to very poor (everyone else, which is shocking because most of them are usually good). Richter is wangsty, Maria is utterly Chickified and reduced to a Damsel in Distress, Alucard's navel gazing is tedious in the extreme, and once again the rules of the Vampire Killer are broken as it starts reacting to something that is not a vampire. The new characters add nothing whatsoever to the story, too. Honestly, the PachiSlot games have better stories than this. What exactly went wrong here?
- Silver Surfer is very difficult, given the combination of ridiculous enemies, Bullet Hell, Everything Trying to Kill You, you being a One-Hit-Point Wonder, and everything else actually being tougher than you. However, you're playing the Silver Surfer, a character whose powerset includes Nigh-Invulnerability. And yet, if you so much as graze a wall, you die, even though you're not even going that fast. "You" means Silver Surfer or any part of his surfboard. That's right, a Wall Banger that actually involves banging into a wall.
- The reason this is a wall banger is the disconnect of having one of the toughest beings in the Marvel Universe getting killed by a pumpkin (or anything else for that matter).
- In Untold Legends: Warrior's Code, you must spend the entire storyline protecting the young teenage prince as he is related by blood to the evil usurping emperor and thus the only person who can wound him. He is extremely weak a fighter, is very annoying to protect, and he will willingly run into enemies away from you where you can't defend him. And when you finally meet the evil emperor, it turns out that you just so HAPPEN to share some ill-defined blood relation to him after all and you were able to do the job on your own all along. It just makes you want to beat the hell out of the little runt for every whiny potion request he makes. Was he REALLY supposed to be a hero, and how can his people possibly see him as their leader, honestly?
- In the DS version of Chrono Trigger it's revealed that DALTON of all people is responsible for bringing down Guardia and the potential deaths of Crono and Marle between Chrono Trigger and Chrono Cross. This is a Wall Banger because Dalton is portrayed as a Small Name, Big Ego and borderline Butt Monkey, and is one of the easiest bosses to beat in the game. Both times you fight him, even. How the player is supposed to believe that he managed to kill a grown-up and probably highly-leveled Crono and Marle...
- There is the scene where, right after Crono has sacrificed himself to Lavos and Schala teleports the rest of the party away, he knocks all three members of the party out with a single fireball spell (Cutscene Power to the Max). Maybe he was using an extreme form of Obfuscating Stupidity, or maybe he pulled a villainous Let's Get Dangerous. It still seems kind of... underwhelming, though.
- The Japanese explain it by him saying something along the line of "Hey, behind you!", making the main characters turn back and allowing him to cheap shot them.
- Do they ever explain how in the name of Magus's codpiece Dalton even knew what Guardia is or when it is? Why would the party tell anyone this, and why would anyone they told BELIEVE them?
- Even with Fanon explanations, this is still a Wall Banger, not for credibility reasons, but for theme reasons: Chrono Trigger is about triumphantly overcoming inevitable fate. Throwing in a random 'and everyone dies in the end', into a sequel that constantly berates the player for having the sheer audacity to try and save a world where Humans Are the Real Monsters, feels like a slap in the face. Plus you still have to use time-travel to save Kid and enable Serge to be saved in the past, so the moral is somewhat twisted when time travel is okay as long as you're saving Masato Kato's favorite characters.
- We all know this one. In Chrono Cross, you can recruit a fellow called Guile, who strongly resembles Magus. Originally, he was going to be revealed to actually be Magus, and have a subplot about discovering his identity and his connection to what was going on, but it was left on the cutting room floor. They cut out a direct link to Chrono Trigger that would have decidedly improved Cross, yet they left forty-four recruitable characters, many of which are objectively awful. Yes, we want stupid wacky characters like the pink dog and the vegetable knight! Don't give us Character Development!
- In the original Chrono Trigger and all its remakes, The Trial subplot is utterly ridiculous. The moment Crono returns Marle home, the chancellor immediately comes to the rash conclusion that Crono is an evil villain who kidnapped the princess and has him imprisoned without giving him a chance to explain himself, and he has Crono put to trial where he demands that Crono be executed immediately. Okay, fine so far; maybe he's just ridiculously overprotective of his princess? That notion is tossed out the window if Crono is found innocent — The chancellor outright lies about the verdict to the captain of the guard (claiming some lost paperwork) and orders Crono be executed. But even after this, none of the protagonists call him out on this when they encounter him again, even though he clearly couldn't be more evil and they should know for a fact just how much of a bastard he truly is now. Nope, Stupidity Is the Only Option, and they instead have to wait until he pulls this trick of making somebody a scapegoat again, only this time he sets up Marle's father, the King himself.
- Street Fighter character T. Hawk, or Thunder Hawk: he's a Native American, but they can't seem to decide which kind, exactly. For one thing, he fights in stereotypical Mexico, complete with Aztecs in traditional costumes behind him, but he doesn't look at all like one himself, when winning he sits and makes a "How!" gesture like a TV Cherokee, and his victory quote is about his totem, which were made only by the Pacific Northwest tribes. His stage being in Mexico is explained as his tribe being forced to relocate, so he's definitely from the US. The other two things, though, seem to indicate a lack of research.
- Well, there's the other issue that Dee Jay's characterisation is dead wrong. We have a supposed resort in Jamaica... and the music AND instruments are out of Venezuela or Colombia or something.
- In the console versions of Street Fighter Alpha 3, when they added T. Hawk to the roster, Capcom couldn't be bothered to make Noembleu, the Shadaloo Doll apparently meant to be T. Hawk's missing girlfriend, into a playable character as well, so they just shoehorned the blatantly German Juli into T. Hawk's backstory by explaining that she's actually Julia, a missing member of T. Hawk's tribe. The Udon comic series attempts to fix this by having T. Hawk search for both, Noembleu and Juli, with Julia being revised into the daughter of a German doctor who befriended the Thunderfoots.
- Apparently T. Hawk was supposed to be American, but his nationality was changed to Mexican after they realized that were more Americans in SF II (Guile, Ken, Balrog) than characters from other nationalities.
- Also, the other victory quote is "Your scream sounds like a pathetic war cry". I'm willing to bet that Capcom got "scream" and "war cry" backwards, since the former would imply fear while the latter would be used to imply badassery.
- Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition added four new characters to the SSF4 roster: Yun, Yang, Evil Ryu, and Oni. Like all of the other characters, they are given rival matches in their arcade storylines. The problem is, these rival matches have no cutscenes whatsoever, making it look like just another match, but with the chosen character's theme playing in the background. Especially jarring for Evil Ryu and Oni, as both have Gouken as a rival. How does Gouken respond to seeing his brother succumb to pure evil and his student succumb to the Satsui No Hadou? "You'll make for an interesting opponent." IE, the same thing he says to EVERY OTHER OPPONENT.
- In Valkyrie Profile, in order to see the actual plot of the game, you have to min-max a stat that has no obvious purpose, wait until a little over halfway through the game to go through a couple of optional dungeons, with no indication that this will have any effect, and eject a certain plot-important character from your party at a certain time, again with no indication that this is important, possible, or desirable. If you don't do every one of these things, the entire game is just a series of unconnected vignettes about random medieval warriors dying. Meanwhile, you can get practical immunity to all forms of death for all party members using only accessories and skills that it's damn near impossible to miss. Do the programmers' priorities seem backward to anybody else?
- In the first Etrian Odyssey game, you reach a point where you are asked to kill the forest folk to continue the plot. No, you don't get a choice. No, they didn't do anything to deserve it either. The in-setting justification that the mayor does for why he assigns you this task? To defend the town's tourism industry.
- It gets worse. When you finally confront the Big Bad, he reveals his plan to...revitalize the war-ravaged world using the Heart of yggdrasil. Yes, that's right, the "villain" is trying to legitimately save the world. And the party still kills him and destroys the Heart, ruining hundreds of years of research and possibly dooming the world, all for some pretty trinkets! In fact, one could argue that at this point, Etrian Odyssey is meant to be a Deconstruction of dungeon delving for fun and profit.
- Even the in the second and third Etrian Odyssey, the villains could be considered Well Intentioned Extremists.
- Who says Super Robot Wars is always a good 'Crossover done right'? OG Gaiden shows how even a plot can be a Wall Banger. The ODE Incident, which is taken from the OVA, which is already a Wall Banger. It pulls Lamia Loveless into the main spotlight of the plot, but only to see her butt naked against her will, smack her with a Distress Ball on the size of a planet even though she's a mightily competent Action Girl. That's just the OVA, but the game cranks this up to eleven. She is later shot down and killed by a third banana villain, and would've stayed dead if a second banana villain didn't bring her Back from the Dead. She is later restored, but her whole scenario gives her no benefits or development at all, instead it only lets us see how grumpy Kyosuke gets to act un-grumpy, and for Axel to show off that he had an honest Heel-Face Turn. That also means that it doesn't matter if she lived, her record will be forever stained that she was defeated by that third banana guy. So basically, despite her being the center of that certain sub plot, she gains nothing out of it and only acts as a plot device for other characters to develop themselves.
- Unfortunately, even the ODE Incident right from the origins (the OVA) rides on Wall Banger surfboard in order to EVEN SUCCEED. Let's see, what's established after the end of Original Generation 2? Graien Grazman took over EFA, and despite his ruthless method, at least he'll make sure that there'll be no more rebellion, especially incidents like this. Then the ODE System and Bartolls, for no good reason... got past Graien's (crap) radar and supervision (as if he suddenly got lenient). Seriously, you may be a minor character, Graien, but WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED WITH YOUR TOTALITARIAN, SUPER STRICT STANCE that you even let that thing pass!? That's seriously something that would happen if Midcrid was still in control, not Grazman. Mind you, there is a reason why SRW fans shun the OVA and would rather consider the ODE Incident and Lamia's humiliating and pointless moment to be one Big Lipped Alligator Moment (except, you know, the one involving Axel's Heel-Face Turn) in OG Gaiden and never talk about it anymore. This trope is the reason.
- For a non-OG Wall Banger, Super Robot Wars has some... silly choices for secret characters. Well, in Super Robot Wars Destiny you can recruit the diabolically evil, irredeemable bitch Katejina Loos. WHO IN THE RIGHT MIND WOULD RECRUIT HER!? Likewise in J, that unsympathetic, smug bastard Jonathan "Johnny Boy" Glenn will join you pretty late; and in K, Asuham Boone, the poster boy for Disproportionate Retribution and Motive Decay, is playable. WHAT THE HELL, BANPRESTO! WHAT THE HELL! You know we'd rather kick them to kingdom come!
- Actually, Asuham isn't that bad in K, since he never gets to the Disproportionate Retribution point. The real problem is they let you recruit Fasalina and Michael, who make very little sense to be recruit-able (Specially Fasalina, who has NO justification other than she has big breasts) while Carossa and Melissa... don't get so lucky. Dammit, why can't we save the poor little kids but let the nutcases join?
- Because the Michael and Fasalina just sort of die five seconds after finding a purpose in life other than following the Claw when a rock (or some rubble or something) literally falls on them at the end of the show? But on the subject of K, and Gun x Sword... "There's other fish in the sea, Van!" Really, Mist? REALLY?
- In MX, they FORCE you to not only see Asahina from RahXephon's death but MAKE YOU KILL HER to continue.
- In terms of machines, it looks like the Black Getter is one of those "player bragging rights"-type units. Alpha 2, you start out with this unit and keep unit the end of the Getter Robo story. In Kusuha and Zengar's routes, you can choose to save the unit and Musashi, but he's forced to stay with Michiru, relegating him to a playing sidekick to a somewhat-useless machine. Black Getter? Can only be piloted by the original Getter Team. And I'm sure a lot of people would rather stay with G than Black at that point. Alpha 3 makes it an unlockable unit, but again, with the same restrictions. In Destiny, the Shin Getter Team is left without a Getter after Shin Dragon is left inoperable for a time. However, you still have Getter Robo and Black Getter. I'm sure at that point, most people chose classic Getter over Black because of its three forms.
- In more Super Robot Wars crossover fail, we have the mere inclusion of Mobile Suit Gundam SEED in Alpha 3, which is a wallbanger on many levels. First, the director of the series shoved it in because he's a fan, even though the story does not fit very well into a universe with a pre-established space colony faction and requires the player to actually swallow that Coordinators and the PLANTS always existed, it's just that no one had any reason to start a war with them until now. It also kneecaps the appearance of Gundam Sentinel, which was going to show up and would have been a logical extension of the Titans storyline from the previous games.
- And, in a related wallbanger, it also allows you to save Mu La Flaga from his canon death in Alpha 3, which means that not being able to save him in Judgment is rather puzzling, since both games feature similar circumstances that would have made keeping him from getting killed easy to implement.
- In Spellforce, to get your siege units to use their anti-building attacks against buildings, you have to set them next to the buildings without ordering them to attack — otherwise, they'll use weak melee attacks.
- The Bittersweet Ending of Wild ARMs 5. Avril's Laser-Guided Amnesia was explained by her being trapped in a Stable Time Loop, and that the events over the course of the game were just one of many, many times she's done this, and she is doomed to repeat those events for all of eternity, never to be with Dean except for the brief period during the game. You couldn't at least have given us the ability to break the time loop and save her, developers?
- Jak 3 attempting to disguise its Darrin-ing of Keira's voice...by giving her a staggering one, maybe two lines in the entire game, and disrupting both of the previous game's established romances to try and set up Jak with Ashelin. To make matters worse, the only line of Keira's was in support of Jak, making him look like a high-grade dick. Of course, in Jak X, they just pretend none of this Jak/Ashelin Shipping ever happened.
- Most fans would say that most of TLF counts, though the one example that really sticks out would be Jak's dismissal of Daxter's Superpowered Evil Side. Especially considering that in Jak 3, he freaked out over what would happen to Daxter if he was exposed to more Dark Eco (which is exactly how the aforementioned Superpowered Evil Side came to be), and his reaction to finding out that the Aeropans had a Dark Warrior Program. And yet, his reaction consists of a couple snarky comments. * thud, thud, thud...*
- There are two in Banjo-Tooie:
- It'd be too difficult to list all the Wallbangers in Kingdom Hearts Coded, but one stands out: the big emotional high point of the game is that Data Sora gets to say "Thank you" to Data Namine, finally fulfilling Sora's promise to Namine from Chain of Memories. There's just one problem. Sora never promised to thank Namine! The promise Sora and Namine made was to meet again, a promise that was fulfilled at the end of Kingdom Hearts II; Namine said as much! The "Thank Namine" thing was just a thing Jiminy made up to remind the whole group (Sora, Donald, Goofy, and Jiminy himself) to thank her for restoring their memories. So when did "Thank Namine" become such a big deal, and why is it attributed solely to Sora (Aside from phasing out of Disney characters in favor of the KH-original ones in importance)?
- In fact, if you go back to the end of Chain of Memories, it's actually ONLY Donald, Goofy, and Jiminy (the Disney characters) that talk of "Thank Namine", Sora literally said nothing about it, let alone make a promise to thank her. Attributing it solely to Sora nothing....it's being re-attributed to a character it was never attributed to in the first place!
- Regarding The King of Fighters, at the time of KOF 96, they recorded new voice samples for King from Art of Fighting. The voice made her sound like a combination of not caring, lazy, and condescending, but the vocals got rerecorded for 97, didn't they? No such chance. Anyone worth a damn had new vocals except King. Fast forward to 2001 and....SHE'S STILL USING THAT GODDAMN VOCAL COLLECTION. From Bad to Worse in SNK vs. Capcom 1 and 2. There King was playable and....she STILL had her 96 to 2001 (or 2002 Unlimited Match) vocals! Compare that to every other SNK character who had brand spanking new vocals for that crossover! Now that, SNK, was just plain LAZY. They could have AT LEAST given King a bit more love and effort than that, but it just proves that They Just Didn't Care. Thankfully the whole thing was fixed when in KOF 2003 King FINALLY had new vocals for the first time in at least SIX OR SEVEN YEARS.
- And what she did get sounded like something right out of a Dead or Alive game. Her vocals were re-recorded again for KOF XIII to an even worse result that makes one wonder if SNK isn't trying to lure in Ryona fetishists.
- Same vein, Geese Howard. Despite he really had his sprite redrawn time after time, his stance animation is still as unsmooth as years ago, EVEN contrary to his son Rock and, one possible exception of this, his Capcom VS SNK appearance. Gaw, come on, SNK! He is your TRADEMARK boss, as well as Rugal!
- While most of the Chzo Mythos story is brilliant, some of the more... unique plot points left some players (including DeceasedCrab) groaning, the main example being the Trilby Clones from 6 Days a Sacrifice. The sex scene in the same game runs a close second.
- Also: "I JUST WANTED TO GO INTO SPACE!"
- The sex scene is an interesting case, as revealed when Yahtzee himself showed up to discuss the games in Quovak's Let's Play on the Something Awful forums. To cut a long story short, the scene isn't supposed to be titillating, but because it was awkwardly written, we have the unique case where both the creator and the audience are on the exact same pagenote , but the audience has been given the wrong impression of what the creator was trying to accomplish.
- In Warriors Orochi, Date Masamune is suddenly turned into a frantic Orochi worshipper and think they can't beat Orochi, even when they DO beat him in the first game. What's making it more wall-banging is that when in Samurai Warriors 2, he pulled off The Starscream to the Tokugawa, he didn't do it to Orochi, even after the hidden cutscene when he makes it clear that he still have The Starscream inside him. The fact that the overly confident Masamune is suddenly turned into an extreme ass-kisser and seems to have lost faith to all humanity and it looks like KOEI seems to hate the Date clan and wants him to be the Dong Zhuo counterpart of the Samurai Warriors series is... very wall-banging.
- Sly 3: Honor Among Thieves: It's not too bad an example, as it's immediately followed by one of the series' best boss fights, but Sly referring to General Tsao as the worst man he's ever met. Mind you, Tsau is a nasty piece of work (kidnapping a woman to use her as a baby maker, manipulated her father into passiveness as it happened, left a Chinese village in terror with his crimes and necromancy, and kicked a puppy twice.) But Sly seems to be forgetting about Clockwerk, a Big Bad of the series who was so obsessed with hatred on the Cooper family that he literally lived off it for centuries, terrorizing them for generations before he finally murdered Sly's parents right in front of him, then left Sly alive in the hopes of watching him grow up to be a miserable failure. And Sly spent a good chunk of the last game describing just how horrible Clockwerk is, raising Clockwerk to something close to an Eldritch Abomination. And apparently his evil pales to a really powerful sexist.
- Haze doesn't really have that far to fall to be terrible; stand-out moments are when Teare turns down Shane's Nectar administrator with the claim that "his pack is slipping" when Mantel soldiers don't wear packs, writer Rob Yescombe not knowing that you don't call a Sergeant sir ever, and especially not if you're one yourself, the peaceful village having it's own nuclear missile, and a series of confused Metaphorgotten issues that lead to the game claiming that people fight wars due to propaganda, which is a natural resource like oil.
- BioShock 2 has generated a few:
- It's considered a "good" act to allow Gil Alexander to survive in his profoundly mutated state despite his pleas in his prerecorded message that he desperately wants to die.
- From Bad to Worse. Not only are you letting him live, regardless of the fact that his recordings begged you to do it. But it's also implied that he wants to flush himself out into the sea. You're letting a gigantic ADAM bloated monstrosity that's totally insane out into the wide world at large. This is a good thing?!
- Devil May Cry 3 contains a particularly absurd example of Gameplay and Story Segregation towards the end of the game. Lady, the Weak, but Skilled Badass Normal, inexplicably becomes capable of tanking Dante for the duration of the fight against her. The fact that she barely seems injured afterwards is just the icing on the cake.
- Devil May Cry 4:
- Sanctus royally pissed off Credo and Nero, two of his best soldiers, by turning them against each other for little to no reason, then kidnapping Kryie to use her in order to activate The Savior. Dante was better for the plan, and with the Yamato and Sparda in his possession, what else could Sanctus possibly need to lure the guy?
- It seems like the writers behind the game couldn't focus on whether or not to put plot in or leave plot out of the story. First Vergil wasn't involved in any way. Then, Nero has a freaky right arm that looks an awful lot like Vergil is bound to it since Nero has some unexplained proficiency with Vergil's sword (after restoring it, no less). Then the novel comes out and says that the Devil Bringer is not Vergil's soul bound to Nero's arm, removing his involvement in the story. But oh yeah, Nero is his son, which means Vergil was involved in the events of the game anyway.
- Throughout most of the game, the player's given control of Nero. One of the best things about his arm is that it can extend to grab/pull things towards him in less than two seconds. Does he use it in the cutscenes to save his girlfriend? No, twice. Would it have helped? Hell yes.
- Devil May Cry 4 certainly seems to have some odd ones. You have to wonder why Nero, someone with the arm of a demon, was allowed to join an organisation as anti-demon as The Order. At the beginning of the game, Nero kept his arm in a sling, presumably to hide the fact but it still makes no sense; don't The Order do a medical? Or a background check? Even if they're not exactly too modern but you'd think they'd notice if one of their members — the only one who doesn't wear white, therefore sticking out like a sore thumb — was part-demon. Why was Nero even in The Order anyway? It's implied that he joined because of Kyrie but it's more than a little clear that he's not the best ... Orderist, or whatever the term is for someone of the religion. Which leads to a less intriguing plot; Nero didn't feel any big sense of betrayal because he wasn't that involved with The Order to begin with. Wouldn't that have made for a better storyline, made it a revenge piece and given the payoff much more gravitas? Instead, it seems as if Nero is already suspicious of The Order — like the majority of pretty boys in Japanese games, he's portrayed as near-infallible (in this case, to the point that he knows plot developments before they even come up) — and therefore expresses no surprise when he's betrayed.
- While there are many issues with Twisted Metal 3, one of the most annoying one is found in Auger's backstory. In his profile, it was said that Auger was a construction worker who had his buildings destroyed by the Twisted Metal competitors. So he wanted revenge on those people. However, upon finishing the game, the story ending had Auger wishing for "everyone to see his inner childhood." Auger's ending and wish has nothing to do with what had been established in his profile.
- Almost every ending in the game is a wallbanger, as Calypso goes well beyond his classical Literal Genie to pervert many wishes into things people never asked for. Axel explicitly wanted to be merged with the machine he was trapped in so it would be an extension of his body, not be turned into a novelty watch! Also, what police officer would consider a perfectly crime-free environment to be a bad thing, even if it meant you had little to do? No wonder the game is regarded as The Scrappy and Canon Discontinuity.
- The constant stupid gender restrictions in the Smackdown vs. Raw games since the 2006 edition. That version for some reason blocked the players from having female wrestlers in any type of extreme rules match. And they were also restricted to appearing in matches that can only have up to four participants. The 2010 edition cleared it up a bit as the women are now allowed in extreme rules matches (excluding Hell in a Cell and the Elimination Chamber) and this time it's a five-women-per-match limit but the game decided to outlaw intergender wrestling altogether so now the only match where men and women can both be in is a Mixed Tag match but the men get disqualified for hitting the women even if it's by accident. And if a man and woman are legal in the ring one of them has a five count to make a tag or it's automatic DQ. So much for gender equality.
- The Mixed Tag Match is a Wall Banger in itself. If you're beating up on your opponent and they tag out, then you're forced to tag your partner in or face a DQ. Okay fine. However, all you really have to do is tag your partner back in, which forces your opponent to do the same. Let the beatdown continue!
- In 2011, you can add the fact that Divas only get one spot on the computer generated Universe cards. Sure you can edit the other matches, but they don't count toward rankings. It reaches extreme Wall Banger territory when you get to Night of Champions, which has the tag line of EVERY title being on the line. At any PPV, only one female championship can be on the line.
- On the point of the men being disqualified for hitting the women? This can happen in any match (Even those where the opposite gender serves as a manager), even if it's a counter.
- And the accompanying restrictions for CAWs. For those who enjoy creating established wrestlers not featured, it will be extremely frustrating to find the only things matching some wrestlers are only available for the wrong gender.
- WWE 2K15 certainly alleviates the CAW problem when it comes to Divas. Because now, you can't create female wrestlers AT ALL. That's right, folks, a feature almost as old as the series itself was suddenly removed, along with several other popular create modes that got the axe with no explanation. This seems less like 2K is trying to accurately reflect the WWE's rules and more like they're slowly trying to kill the very concepts of creativity and fun.
- In Just Cause 2, the ending of the main story sees America take over the island of Panau after tying the last leader to a nuke and using it to blow up the island's rich oil field. Apparently the island suffers no ill effects from having a nuke exploded a couple of hundred metres away from it. And the people are happy to accept American government after they brutally murdered their last leader and sent you to blow up their stuff and support the island's dangerous gangs and drug dealers.
- America seems like a preferable governor to the previous brutal dictatorship. Also, no-one but the Agency knows that Rico was a government agent - they all think he's a mercenary called Scorpio.
- In Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha As Portable: The Battle of Aces, Fate's Evil Twin Material-L is the only one that doesn't get to fight with her original in the Story Mode. She doesn't even show up in any of the CGs either.
- The ending to the released version of Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords. To be fair, Executive Meddling is responsible, but the ending as presented was still done in the worst possible way. The part where the game outright tells you what happens to your characters was lame, but felt more like the creators throwing the fans a bone than anything else. But the sequence leading up to the final battle is where things really fell apart. We are given a sequence in which Bao-Dur's robot helper is given a subquest by a holographic message from Bao-Dur. There is a reason for this: in the cut content, Bao-Dur had died, and he recorded this message in advance. The subquest is fairly simple: turn on a device on a series of crashed republic vessels. However there's a scene where another character attempts to stop him, and the story never returns to the scene, but the final cutscene in the game makes it very clear the mission is successful (if you get the Light Side ending that is). What was supposed to happen was another character was supposed to pull a Big Damn Heroes moment, but that got cut too. So the question is: why didn't they just cut the scene where the other character tried to stop the remote? Additionally: Why didn't they replace the hologram of Bao-Dur with the real thing, since in this version there was no reason to think he was dead?. And that's without even mentioning the HK-50 Factory. The ending was so nonsensical that several Star Wars handbooks felt the need to directly reference plot elements from the cut content just so they could give a coherent canon.
- Halo: Reach
- Noble Six remains behind to defend the Pillar of Autumn as it escapes Reach. To do so, s/he must destroy an approaching Covenant cruiser with a MAC Cannon. Six tells this to Keyes as he arrives in a Pelican to pick the Spartan up. Who else is in the Pelican? A dozen marines. There were several zealots and a field marshal between six and the gun, and lots of incoming banshees and phantoms on the way, so a dozen marines wouldn't have been able to pull it off. However, they could've at least tried to soften 'em up while they were pulling away.
- The Covenant dropship comes out of nowhere, from the direction the second Pelican was actually looking. It may have snuck behind the mountain, but the first warning the UNSC men apparently got was the plasma bolts it shot from just off-frame. Apparently, it was invisible until then. It might make sense that a Field Marshal would have a cloak-capable Phantom (like the one the Arbiter's support team uses in The Covenant in Halo 3), but showing it actually coming out of cloak would have been nice.
- Kat's death. It occurred as Noble Team was making a dash to a nuclear bunker to wait out the Covenant's bombing of New Alexandria. As is explained in supplemental materials, Kat highly dislikes her armor's energy shields, and has them turned off at all times when she deems them unnecessary. But the Wall Banger part is that not even God would know what Kat deems "necessary" for energy shields. All we know is that Kat deems escaping a nearby bombing while in an extremely tall building is apparently deemed unnecessary for energy shields being activated. It could've been overconfidence issues, similar to being as much of a threat as a trio of Grunts armed with only Plasma Pistols at that particular moment, and it's not like she KNEW there was a whole in the ceiling that a Phantom and a Needle Rifle-toting Field Marshal were waiting, but still.
- Heavy Rain:
- Among many other things, the reveal that the Origami Killer is Scott Shelby, despite the fact that you spend a quarter of the game in his shoes with access to his thoughts. Though the game's ridiculous need to have Madison near or completely nude and constantly sexually assaulted is a close second. Even if you pay attention to what they are thinking during the course of the game the reveal doesn't make a whole lot of sense when you break down the story. This is mainly due to an ungodly number of plot holes that seem to be handwaved away in an effort to provide tension as to who the real killer is. In most other games they could have been easily fixed but due to Heavy Rain's very strict storyline requirements the holes are left gaping. This is practically a wallbanger in and of itself.
- A related, smaller one is how Scott was able to perform the kidnappings: by impersonating a cop. Or rather, he was a cop, but retired. And the police just let officers who are no longer working with them keep their badge and ID?
- NBA 2K10 and 2K11: The My Player mode has some real wallbangers. For example, if your team is down by five, there's a minute left, your player is a three point specialist, and is wide open, but if he misses, the game claims "Bad Shot Selection". It goes From Bad to Worse: You can have a layup turn into a Bad Shot Selection just because someone ran over to you and the animation changed into one of those difficult contact layup animations. Instead of being a foul, you get a missed shot and your teammate grade goes down. And then there's the CPU initiating bumping animations which prevent your player from following the playcall diagrams on the court, breaking the play. If you have a good 3pt shooting PG like Aaron Brooks, watch in helpless anger as he jacks up a fade away 3 because the CPU wouldn't let you set a pick.
- In Valkyria Chronicles II, at the end of the Yuel mission, The Chick Cosette freezes up in an Heroic BSOD when it's time to help the wounded - nevermind that she treated wounded people a lot of times before that, and must have seen blood by the bucketload, making this look like a contrivance to get the plot going. And what does Avan do to help her recover from that? If you think that this Replacement Scrappy for Welkin Gunther just took his own gun and shot himself in the gut to force Cosette into action, you're sadly right. Seriously, there's Idiot Hero, and then there is this; at least Avan got called out on his stupidity, though he definitely got off easier than he deserved. This was apparently so bad that in Valkyria Chronicles III, the developer introduced a storyline mission that justified Cossette's phobia. It's not so much fear of blood, it's just a similar situation happened when she was a wee lass, during the Imperial invasion, in that very same city. Heavy duty Player Punch, that.
- Before the first battle with the Steel Witch in Luminous Arc, it's revealed she has one of the Lapistier in her body. After the battle, rather than finishing her off and claiming the Lapistier, every decides to leave her there and make tracks. This is reasonable for the main party, being the Neutral Good heroes and all. Vanessa, on the other hand, explicitly joined you for that class alone as an Enemy Mine, explicitly said she'll raise hell in her independent quest for the Lapistier and get them whatever the cost, and has already shown herself to be more than impulsive and pragmatic enough to rip the stone out of her chest, leaving her with no excuse and falling squarely into this trope.
- The Splatterhouse remake, although a very solid brawler, has one glaring flaw. The ending. The Big Bad is defeated in a cutscene, and the "final battle" is literally nothing but a ludicrously difficult Escort Mission. On the plus side, there's a blatant Sequel Hook, so at least there's hope that the next installment won't end on such an Anti-Climax.
- In DC Universe Online, if you create a hero character aligned with Wonder Woman, you'll meet and work with Zatanna. If you have any knowledge of her character, you'll take it for granted that she'll be shouting stuff like "namtaB tegrof" or "wolb tihs pu!" But for whatever reason (and even though Oracle tells you about her unique spellcasting method before you meet her), all of her lines are delivered straight: "heal ally," "drain Faust," etc.
- If you play through Touhou's seventh game, Perfect Cherry Blossum, as Marisa, you will come across a big gate that serves as Hakugyokurou's gate to the world of the living and will be confronted by the Prismriver Sisters. Marisa will insist that they open the gate for her, which leads to the fight. Guess what happens afterwards? Apparently, the gate is just a decoration, and you just need to fly over it, which effectively defeats the point of fighting them.
- Valkyria Chronicles. Faldio's entire plotline is a big, Anvilicious showcase for the game's anti-war Aesops, specifically that escalation and the pursuit of military power through WM Ds is wrong, but when you actually look at the events of the war, he was absolutely right. The fact that he shot Alicia to awaken her powers is the only reason Gallia wasn't wiped off the map by Selvaria. If he had only been imprisoned for it, because regardless of his reasoning, he did commit treason, that would have been fine. But no, he escapes from prison just long enough to apologize and then die as an apology in a completely needless Stupid Sacrifice, and Selvaria obliterates all the people he saved in her own Stupid Sacrifice.
- In Starcraft II The Tosh-Nova decision in New Folsom. Letting Nova be a choice between the two people, despite her clear affiliation with the Big Bad. As Tosh best states, "She won't even join you." Ghosts being "classic" and Nova being attractive cannot possibly be justifiable reasons for such possible Character Derailment of Raynor, who spent the last two Covert Missions helping Tosh anyway to get funding for more troops and upgrades to already-attained schematics to put a blow to Mengsk in the long run. The irony in all this is Tosh himself does not prove to Raynor any distrust, and there is nothing that supports Nova in the campaign...at all. Tosh even explains the inhabitants of New Folsom to be political prisoners.
- The way Zeratul, one of the wisest characters of the first game, is reduced to an utter moron. Upon seeing a ghostly, translucent figure of Tassadar, that announces: "I have come to you from beyond this world", all he can utter is: "But you are dead!" Well, DUH! Another time he engages a Protoss-Zerg Hybrid and incredulously inquires about who could possibly create such monstrosity, despite the fact he met said creator in person and heard his confession!
- The Reveal the Dark Voice aka the Fallen One, Amon, enslaved the Zerg Swarm to destroy the Protoss, and, subsequently, all life in the universe, so that he could remake it In Their Own Image. Too similar to Warcraft to be a coincidence.
- - Hey, people, we have to destroy the space platforms the Zerg use as spawning ground for their air forces! - Ok, let's Nuke 'em. - We can't! The nests are too deep underground. - So what's the plan then? -Why, we'll go there in full force and assault the surface-mounted generator...reactor...stabilizer...thingies that, when destroyed, will trigger a chain reaction blowing up the whole platform. - So why don't we Nuke THEM?
- Golden Eye 1997: One word: Natalya. She is the most irritating character ever. You kill her former friend who is in league with the person trying to kill her; what does she do? Thank you? No, she hates you and refuses to go on. You go into a control room and blow up all the computers except one; what does she do? Insist on using the one you destroyed, IGNORING the one you left, running off and telling you to stop 'clowning around'. After all this, it's satisfying to just shoot the damn bitch and be done with it.
- LEGO Island 2 was a HUGE offender on Castle Island. Apparently the Brickster broke the bridge between the two smaller islands, and now the neighbors can't battle. First of all, if you look at the bridge, it's a five-foot gap. They could easily just jump the gap, cut down some of the trees and lay them across it, or swim across it, but instead, they make Pepper do all of the work by making HIM repair the bridge himself. Secondly, how the heck is it a bad thing that the war is postponed? Once you get all that ridiculous crap over with, you have to win a joust, and there's one point where you have to get a horse, which the people up in the castle just toss down from the top. How did the horse get up there at all, and how did he get thrown down so easily without a scratch? Once you get the joust done, you have to battle Cedric by using cannons. Okay, if the war was postponed, why couldn't they use the cannons? What's even stranger is how the cannons can't be destroyed if you're not in them.
- In the books, having Ron Weasley suddenly develop the ability to mimic a phrase in a rare, non-human, magical language he'd only ever heard twice before was a wall banger of mammoth proportions: the desperate act of an author who'd painted her characters into a corner and had to break her own rules to get them out of it. Giving him the ability to open any Parseltongue puzzle in Lego Harry Potter Years 5-7 was far, far worse: it removed any point in having Harry Potter in the Free Play part of the game. long explanation
And the most wall-bangery part? The part of the storyline where Ron is required to use his author-granted ability isn't even shown in the game — not even as a cutscene!
- Clock Tower:
- In the first game, why wasn't there any effort to protect Dan given his Mama Bear? And the can of gasoline just kind of exploded on him? How? Why was there even a tank in the caves at all? And what possible reason did Mary have for bringing the girls to the mansion to torture them anyway, besides For the Evulz? Plots that take wild leaps of logic are nothing new to Survival Horror games, but unlike, say, Silent Hill, Clock Tower just doesn't have that interesting of a plot to even excuse the wall bangers.
- Then in the second game, we learn that Dan somehow survived in the body of a normal young boy. How? Why? While there are fanon explanations, canonically that's just an epic Ass Pull to give the sequel a connection to the original.
- Alien grenadiers in X-Com: Terror From The Deep. Despite the fact that the Vibro Blade weapons they carry are supposedly capable of "cracking through the toughest armor", they never use them in combat with your troops - not even if they've run out of grenades.
- GTA: San Andreas: In San Andreas, the player controls the character CJ, a lower income African American gangsta type who left due to one tragedy and returned due to another. He is met with initial disrespect for his absence the past few years and labeled a Busta by just about everyone in his family and local gang; this wouldn't be an issue if it actually changed by game's end. By game's end the player has probably collected all that can be collected, tagged all that can be tagged, reclaimed all territories, purchased all land, he has connections with the government, fronts a popular rap artist, owns half the country and is the sole deciding factor in his elder brother's freedom from jail, who by the way got his own self in the slammer due to his pig headedness and even after all this, all the stuff he has done for his family, all the shocking reveals of how much CJ's brother just flat out sucked as a leader considering how many traitors were in their midst, his brother still calls him a 'busta' and the absolute biggest Wall Banger of it all, CJ agrees with him. The main character is solely responsible for his brother escaping the daily pole dance in jail and he agrees with him on being basically what amounts to an unreliable loser? Sure Ten Penny needed to be stopped before he came after them again, but come on, show some Backbone CJ. And t only reason why GSF is back in game is that CJ came back and joined. Also, he is also allied with powerful Chinese Triad. Worse yet, CJ never points out how much he has accomplished in such a short time, no matter how much Sweet calls him out.
- In Bad Company 2 where they just ignore the truckload of gold from the previous game and make no explanation to where it went.
- The ending of Star Wars: Republic Commando. So, right after you complete the final mission by blowing up the Separatist warship with four rocket turrets, one manned by each commando, Boss, Fixer, and Scorch reunite and get ready to be picked up. Sev then radios in and calls for help, as he is being attacked by multiple enemies, and then his radio is filled with static. Delta Squad wants to rescue him, but they are ordered out immediately by their clone advisor, who has direct orders from Yoda to do so. "What is the problem with that?", some you may be thinking. "That's war for you, tragedies happen all the time." My response: yes, but this goes far beyond "tragic necessity" and veers right into "just plain stupid and extremely poorly handled" territory. Why? Because there was no reason to leave him behind. True, the Republic may be beginning its invasion of Kashyyk, but it's not a dire emergency and it's not like Delta Squad is another 501st; they're commandos, not infantry troops. It probably will be a while before they can begin their next mission anyway. Furthermore, the commandos could EASILY have rescued Sev. The four rocket turrets were all in the same relatively small arena (each overlooking the main floor), which by the way has a large opening for the pickup gunship. There is NO reason Delta Squad could not have quickly run back to Sev's position, bailed him out, and have the gunship pick them up from Sev's turret position, considering the design of the arena. If they really are that many enemies, the gunship can just blow them to smithereens, like it did during at the end of the Geonosis droid factory level and the Trandoshan supply camp level. It shows poor handling on the game developer's part, and, in-universe, all it does is show more reason to despise the Jedi as assholes and idiots. You know it's that bad when, as the novels show, Delta Squad enthusiastically assists in wiping out the Jedi and look up to a new non-clone leader who has developed an enormous disdain for Force users in general.
- In Ōkami, there's a moment when Amaterasu and Issun fight Orochi in the past era of Kamiki. Before they do so, however, Oki (who recklessly followed them prior) attempts to slay the enemy with a sword that just doesn't work when the wielder only thinks about brute force. The Wall Banger occurs when he is told that a previously missing character, Lika, was under the bell that hid the demon's weakness, and he says he doesn't care at all, because he only thinks about becoming stronger and stronger so he can later fight bigger, more powerful creatures. The good news is, he is deservedly massacred by Orochi.
- Resident Evil 2:
- By the start of the game the zombie apocalypse is roughly two days old, the Police/Army/Umbrella mercenaries have been nearly completely wiped out, half the city is on fire, and apparently the news of the situation has spread far enough for the government to consider nuking the city. This is where we find a comically oblivious truck driver who acts in complete shock when a guy bites into his bicep. Where and what has he been doing for the last few days... were the thick plumes of smoke and the blood soaked streets not enough of a clue something big was going down?
- The extent of the destruction is largely only depicted in the sequels to RE2, but it still seems very odd that —as the gun shop owner can attest— no one noticed anything amiss until the streets were completely overrun with zombies.
- As great as the idea was in theory; the zapping mechanic fails to the point that it starts to affect your Willing Suspension of Disbelief. Keys/emblems/items/files duplicate themselves on the exact same shelf, the spontaneously generating STARS locker, the fact that Claire and Leon would logically have crossed paths at least ten or so times more than they do, the fact that the Scenario A character never meets the Tyrant nor sees any of the damage he causes, puzzles reset themselves etc. What's worse is that these are problems that could have been easily solved by just adding a few more scenario-exclusive areas.
- The E-brake puzzle in Resident Evil 0 is one of the most harebrained things to ever come out of the series. Two arithmetic puzzles keyed in on opposite ends of a speeding train are the only way to stop the train in an emergency, which —as the very word implies— can "emerge" at a split-second's notice. A few diehard fans have tried, but there's no possible explanation they could come up with for the puzzle's existence that doesn't just make it even more insane. It can't be a coincidence that 0 was that last traditional RE game to come out before the series underwent a Genre Shift; it's seriously that stupid.
- Max Payne 3 contains many instances, but one that stands out in particular is when Max finally gets to the location where the wife of his now dead employer is being held hostage, along with another girl he is sworn to protect. You'd expect for his to quietly take down them hostage-takers quietly, or at the very least, wait to they leave. What does Max do? He charges on in loudly proclaiming his entrance, all in front of about a dozen enemies. Not surprisingly, the wife gets killed. At this point, it is hard to buy Max as anything but an incompetent buffoon. To be completely fair to the game...he agrees.
- In Valkyria Chronicles III, much of the plot of both this game and the first can be axed if only Riela would present herself in front of the Gallian military morons, and says "I'M A GODDAMN VALKYRIA" (and turn into a Valkyria, of course). But no, the intrigues of the top brass (which involves the Yggdism Church) prevents her from doing exactly that.
- Army of Two: The Devil's Cartel, the big "twist" is one gigantic case of Fridge Logic: Salem being the main villain dosen't make sense for a variety of reasons, first off it's completely out of character, the game does a really shitty job of explaining why he became evil, long story short: he got pissed that Alpha and Bravo wanted to rescue a girl(which Salem was against due her not being their "priority" in spite of him saving dozens of civilians in the previous game)and then the vehicle he's in got hit by a rocket and everyone thought he was dead. He may have been pissed, but it still makes no sense for him to turn his back on TWO (especially Rios). Also, Salem claims that Bautista(the head of the cartel) let him join the ranks, it defies logic that the cartel not only didn't kill Salem when they had the chance but allowed him to join and become a figurehead(El Diablo). Also, apparently the "shoot your partner" ending of The 40th Day is the canon ending(Rios shooting Salem), despite the fact that those endings make it clear that your partner is stone cold DEAD, having it changed so that Rios shot Salem(very much out of character for him) and that he survived makes no sense whatsoever. Then there's the final act, where things get really convoluted and nonsensical, when Alpha, Bravo and Fiona(the girl who you saved at the beginning and whom Alpha and Bravo were trying to rescue) confornt Bautista and Fiona kills him, Salem(who's been taunting you over the radio for the past few levels) calls you and tells you it was a set-up(Foreshadowed by Fiona commenting on how easily she escaped capture), how on earth did he know exactly how things would go down, how could he have predicted that Fiona would kill the guy, and how did he know Bautista wouldn't double-cross him? and what was the point of the set-up anyways? Was it just to fuck with everyone? Then Salem takes Fiona hostage and holds a gun to her head, Rios arrives and tries to talk Salem down, in spite of the fact that Salem had previously killed the mayor whom Alpha and Bravo had been trying so hard to protect, Rios had a hard time accepting it, but he should've had enough common sense by then to know Salem wasn't planning on negotiating. Then Salem kills Fiona(in a major case of Cutscene Incompetence, any one of the three could've shot Salem in the head) Ok if he was going to do that, why didn't he do it earlier instead of waiting until TWO showed up and doing that needlessly complicated set-up with her killing Bautista? His plan made no logical sense whatsoever
- In Lego Batman 2: DC Super Heroes, there's so many cases of They Wasted a Perfectly Good Character that it's obvious they didn't show their work. Here's some examples:
- Lego Marvel Super Heroes:
- Loki gets such a ridiculous amount of Popularity Power that he's in full-on Villain Sue mode. To the point where he not only easily manipulates Doctor Doom of all people, (who's really not much fun in gameplay either) but makes him look like a bumbling moron. But the moment Loki's Villain Sue status goes through the roof is when he mind-controls Galactus.
- The game has over 150 playable characters available, but they only give passing focus to anyone beyond the MCU stars, Wolverine, and Spider-Man. Typical, right? Except, despite, again, 150 characters, over 100 of these are white male characters. Hell, Falcon, a character who's one of the main characters of their recent animated show and film, is DLC! Sure, a small number of minority characters isn't exactly uncommon, but when your cast is that big, you'd expect them to include a bit more diversity.
- There is a Wall Banger that happens at the very end of the Ultimate (Wii U and Nintendo 3DS) version of Monster Hunter 3, otherwise a highly-regarded Polished Port of the Wii version. After completing every single quest in the nine rank chapters of Moga Village, the Guild Sweetheart tells the Guild about the main character's deeds and achievements while hunting and/or capturing monsters. But apparently she gushed about him/her too much, because the quest sent to test the hunter's skills is a G-Rank mission against an Ivory Lagiacrus, an Azure Rathalos and a Brachydios, neither of which are pushovers even on High Rank. The Wall Banger is the fact that there are no other G-Rank missions in the village, so even the most skilled hunter from Low and High Ranks will be curb-stomped by monsters adjusted to a rank that no player will likely have played at that point yet. The player is essentially forced to go to Tanzia Port and play most of the same missions from Low and High Ranks just to access G Rank and find some decent gear and weaponry to complete an offline quest. An example of both Wall Banger and Fake Longevity.
- Certain Missions in Project X Zone require that a certain unit pair never dies. So whenever a certain unit pair loses all their health, the entire mission is lost, despite the fact they could have easily been revived.
- Medal of Honor has always at least tried to maintain a realistic and well-researched view of the WWII battles they've featured, which makes the final mission of Airborne such a Wallbanger. You play as a paratrooper trying to take a Nazi flaktower (something the real life Allies never really did) which is stupid on it's own because it's an anti-air defense, meaning sending paratroopers would be tantamount to mass suicide. It also features Nazi Super Soldiers capable of surviving an RPG blast to the FACE that can fire the massive MG 42 (a machine gun designed for stationary placement) from the hip.
- In the Bioshock Infinite DLC Burial at Sea, we learn that Daisy wasn't a Well-Intentioned Extremist, she was sacrificing herself for the greater good' and that Comstock never truly believed in his religion and merely used it for his own benefit. These events pretty much destroy the idea that the War in Columbia was a war of extremists, neither of whom were really heroic and makes it more of a Black and White, Good Vs. Evil story. This seemed done mainly to placate the Social Justice Warriors who complained that portraying a black woman as a villain was racist and misogynist, even if said villain was complex and had a sympathetic backstory. Making Daisy a good guy and Comstock into a cynical profiteer also undermines the whole "Extremism can make even the most righteous and well-intentioned person into a monster" message of the original game.
- This also contradicts their characterization in the main game, especially in their audio journals. Comstock is never even hinted at not believing in his religion; at the end of the game he has no problem goading Booker into killing him because he believes its what's God wants and will turn Elizabeth against him. It's also made clear multiple times he has no problem dying if it means Elizabeth will continue his work. Similarly Fitzroy has no issues attempting to kill Booker in the 'Vox wins' universe because him being alive ruins his martyr status. Her troops don't even hesitate to kill, burn, and loot their way through Columbia, forcing out innocent people for the hell of it. Talk about Character Derailment.
- For some, the end of Star Fox Adventures went a little something like this: All right, it's the final fight, I'm about to face off General Scales in one final smackdown... Wait, why did that Krazoa Spirit spontaneously come out of him? Why is that Krazoa statue laughing evilly and floating off to space? WHY THE HELL DOES FOX HAVE TO BEAT ANDROSS AGAIN IN THE EXACT SAME MANNER AS THE LAST GAME(S)? (Alternatively: WHO THE HECK IS THIS ANDROSS GUY?)
- Another big one occurs in Star Fox Command. In one of the paths, Krystal sympathizes with Andross, calling him a man of pure intentions, only wanting to help Lylat, but was railroaded by Pepper wanting to stop Andross research. She also states that the only reason Andross is the bad guy was because he killed Fox's father. First off, even if Andross was unfairly treated, it still does not excuse his reaction to Pepper wanting to stop whatever research was taking place. Second, not only was Andross responsible for the death of Fox's father, but he also was responsible for the deaths of others in Corneria when he unleashed one of his weapons upon them before the events of Star Fox 64. Finally, there's the matter of him trying to kill Krystal in Adventures in order to restore himself and destroy the Lylat System. Whatever pure intentions Andross had had long gone by the time Adventures took place. Given her personality in the previous games, one would think that she would know better than to stoop that low, even if Fox was in the wrong in kicking her off the team. Oh, and this conversation takes place in a path that led to her rejoining Star Fox for good.
- And it gets worse than that... Star Fox Adventures, Krystal's introduction to the series, has Andross trying to come Back from the Dead by draining Krystal's life force, killing her and almost causing the destruction of Sauria (Dinosaur Planet) in the process. But wait! It gets worse! There are a few slight implications that Andross was involved in some way, in causing the destruction of Cerinia, Krystal's home planet, of which she is the only survivor. Let's repeat that for clarification: HE TRIED TO KILL HER, MAY HAVE KILLED HER ENTIRE CIVILIZATION, AND WOULD HAVE KILLED ANOTHER, and she, of all people, IS DEFENDING HIM?! It probably wouldn't be surprising to say that Krystal underwent some major Character Derailment in Command.
- Mario Tennis has a tournament mode which allows you to play Singles or Doubles. If you play in Doubles, you get a computer player as a partner. In a game that allows up to 4 players in Exhibition Mode, why, why would they have a Doubles Tourney mode and not let you play it co-operatively with another player? And then for the Nintendo GameCube version, they did it again. Adding to that, in the N64 version, you can't choose your partner for the Doubles Tournament. Your partner depends on the character you chose. For example, if you picked Mario, your partner would always be Luigi. The Gamecube version does get somewhat redeemed since you at least get to choose your partner.
- Even a critically acclaimed franchise like The Legend of Zelda has inevitably triggered questionable moments, like:
- In The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword, just before your second fight with Ghirahim, he shows Link a painting that depicts two Gates of Time; one that Impa destroyed in Lanaryu Desert, and other in the Sacred Grove that you're trying to activate, which Ghirahim is trying to find. Link never reveals its location, however, he doesn't bother to tell the priestess that Ghirahim is looking for the gate, which he not only eventually finds, but uses it to drag Zelda to the past and revive his master, Demise, setting up the curse of Ganon's various appearances throughout the series. While there have been moments in the franchise where the heroes or the villains have had their plans thwarted by the Idiot Ball, this one takes the cake.
- During the ending, before Fi disappears forever, she tells Link that she feels the stirring of happiness at their time spent together. The problem is that there has been no evidence at all of these growing emotions throughout the entire game, so the whole scene comes off as a half-assed attempt at Character Development thrown in at the very last second for the sake of a cheap Tear Jerker.
- Ganon was widely depicted as a Card-Carrying Villain early in the series, but this was thankfully averted in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker, giving old Ganon a Freudian Excuse. Then, Nintendo releases Skyward Sword, revealing that Ganon is nothing but a continuation of Demise's curse, completely ruining The Wind Waker's beautiful characterization of Ganondorf and re-establishing his role as motiveless Card-Carrying Villain.
- In a similar vein, Link was always depicted as an ordinary boy/man with a pure heart and tremendous courage, in effect an everyman. Skyward Sword basically retconned his backstory so that he's no longer an everyman but rather the divine goddess' chosen champion, essentially meaning that he doesn't make his own personal choices but is reincarnated to fulfil a set role, making him a 'good' counter-point to the now even more hollow Ganondorf.
- The Master Sword's origin as a sword forged by the mystical sages to keep evil in check is retconned to an unoriginal 'It came from the Gods'. It also makes no mentions of the Wind and Earth sages of The Wind Waker.
- The Hyrule Historia's poor attempt to make an official timeline of the games brings many wall bangers. The biggest one, of course, being the "Downfall Timeline" that supposedly happens if Link dies in the end of Ocarina of Time, something that hasn't been hinted before. It also has many continuity errors like the Oracle games who, according to the timeline, takes place after A Link To the Past and features the same Link and the same Zelda despite the fact that the Oracles heavily imply that both of them meet for the first time in the linked game.
- Another from The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword is having Wii MotionPlus support but not having a left-handed mode. The choices for the left-handed are to try and use their right hand for precision swordplay or hold the sword in their left and have to account for Link being mirrored from my perspective. Even more insulting is that Link has been left-handed himself in several games.
- From The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess there's The Reveal of Zant's true nature. Not the reveal itself. It's actually a good way to give a villain some depth. Or, at least, it would be if it wasn't so poorly handled. The reason many fans complained about it, and rightly so, was that there was absolutely nothing done to foreshadow it. For most of the game, you're led to believe Zant is this menacing, powerful, nearly unshakable force of darkness and evil and then when you get to the fight with him, he just breaks his earlier persona with little to no warning. And while a flashback shows he was insane from the start, it's shown during said Villainous Breakdown and nowhere before. Writers, there's a Plot Twist and then there's an Ass Pull. This was a definite Ass Pull to many.
- The Last Story gets one for not letting the player keep the Zanlance, which disappears without explanation, and is never seen or mentioned again. You've been stonewalled by series of barriers, shields and force fields. Finally you get something that can strike right through one these that would logically solve this problem for the rest of the game. Then, it is abandoned just in time for another "unbreakable" aura to hinder you.
- Street Pass Mii Plaza: In Find Mii, each color has a unique magic ability, some more useful than others, and a few being very essential. Mii Force does the same as a constant gimmick to their pod's attack. The change from Find Mii to Mii Force managed to make formerly useless colors and make them powerful. Remember how useless Dark Green magic was? They still suffer the same treatment in Mii Force; a bouncing ball that's exponentially overshadowed by its lighter cousin (a tractor beam that's very handy in collecting Gems) and has absolutely abysmal offensive and defensive capabilities. And people still have the nerve to stay Dark Green!
- Fire Emblem:
- In Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn, you absolutely cannot Take a Third Option regarding the fate of Pelleas in your first playthrough. You must play the game twice to get out of killing him. Even though it turns out that killing him is useless anyway! Also, early on, you meet Izuka, the most Obviously Evil character ever. Pelleas is quite trusting of him despite this, which is understandable for various reasons, if idiotic. The real Wall Banger comes from when Izuka feeds Muarim the elixir that turns him into a Feral One. Muarim is saved and Izuka...keeps his job. Despite the fact he crossed the Moral Event Horizon and has been proven to be a terrible strategist, Pelleas STILL completely trusts him. The reason of course is because the plot says so.
- In Awakening, Chapter 21, Chrom decides to meet with the leader of Plegia to discuss the location of a MacGuffin, despite knowing that Plegia has a long history of hostility towards them and that they're almost certainly plotting a trap. They are, and during the summit, the Fire Emblem is taken by Plegia. Chrom's rationale for this? "My sister never refused a diplomatic gesture, no matter how foul smelling." Said sister got herself killed by Plegia because she listened to Honor Before Reason. Sorry, Chrom, but lampshading that this is a terrible idea doesn't change the fact that it's a terrible idea.