WMG: You Don't Mess with the Zohan
Mariah Carey was behind everything.
Mariah got sick of being upstaged by Madonna
, Britney Spears
and Lady Gaga
and decided to top all of them by becoming the first person in the music industry to have a superhero for a hairdresser. Throughout the entire movie she
was playing Gambit Roulette
behind the scenes; everything that happened was to further her goals. First she bribed the Israelis to let Phantom go, giving Zohan an opportunity to fake his death. Once Zohan was in the USA, Mariah realized that he would need a place to stay but didn't want him to know she'd been manipulating him, so she caused the accident that resulted in Zohan meeting Michael. Later on, she discovered that Phantom knew Zohan was alive and decided to take advantage of the situation to get rid of Walbridge
, who was starting to get on her nerves for various reasons. She infiltrated Walbridge's company in disguise
and influenced him to make the decisions that lead to his downfall. She even recommended that he hire the redneck terrorists because she knew that Zohan and Phantom would team up to defeat them. She agreed to perform at the hackysack game so she could make absolutely certain that everything was going according to plan. In case you're wondering how she could have the knowledge that would be needed to pull off all of this, she's a Time Lord
Zohan Is a direct descendant of The Assassins.
Given his heritage, it's logical to assume that he is from a line of descendants of the Legendary Assassin
, most likely a direct descendant of one of his offspring who stayed in the Middle-East : the Assassin "Altaiz" translation: