Charline Harris got her initial inspiration from Buffy the Vampire SlayerThink about it. The show's been mentioned a couple times, so she's clearly a fan. And remember that episode in the third season when Buffy got telepathic powers? They were kinda fun but also unpleasant and overwhelming and the only person she couldn't read was her vampire boyfriend. Obviously Charline Harris saw the episode, thought the idea was neat and decided to put her own spin on it.
Sookie purposely lets people destroy her house.She's come to realize that people will just buy her much better stuff to replace what they broke. When Eric and Pam fight in her kitchen, she's rather forward and automatic in her demand that she be repayed.
Sookie's an Unreliable NarratorHence the continuity errors - she doesn't remember all the details. She also may have fudged some things in her favor.
Sookie dies in the finaleThe later books are just someone piecing together her life after the finale. The reason why she seems different is because the person is assuming that was how she felt and acted.