WMG / Stephenie Meyer

They both wrote popular teen book series with loads of Meaningful Names, and both named their Main Character the name they would have given their next child. Both of their main characters start out as self-professed "nobodies" who wind up having fantastical adventures. Meyer is what Rowling would have been if she didn't have any writing skill.

Stephenie Meyer is a Shadow of the Lovers Arcana that grew an Ego and became a human.
Therefore she represents the aspects of the Reversed Lovers Arcana, in particular the idea of a "forced pairing." Her Small Name, Big Ego problems could be attributed to her still struggling to come to grips with the fact that she isn't properly human and/or the Midnight Channel did a number on her sanity.

Stephenie Meyer is a pseudonym for Stephen King.
Think about it. "Stephenie' is a feminine version of Stephen, (maybe the alternative spelling was made in relation to his name) and 'Meyer' means 'higher or superior.' Like a King.

Stephen King created Stephenie Meyer either as a social experiment, something to add to his universe, or just to troll teenyboppers.
  • Considering Meyer's attitude, it also makes her name a lot more meaningful.

That must be why Stephen King said in an interview that Stephenie Meyer "can't write worth a darn." He doesn't want anybody to guess his secret.
  • Then the actress portraying her in interviews must be a very brave woman, what with the hate machine being all big and hatey. Unless you're suggesting that Stephen Kingnote  has mastered real life Latex Perfection...

They Plotted a Perfectly Good Waste?
  • She's actually a marketing genius who specifically targeted the demographic of "idiots who decide they hate a series and then continue to obsessively follow it anyway".
  • So, Springtime for Hitler?

Stephenie Meyer is a vampire hunter
She wrote the Twilight books to make vampires too embarrassed to go out and be evil.

Stephenie Meyer is Tara Gilesbie.
At some point she realized she could make money with her talent. The rest is history.
  • Unlikely. At least Meyer can spell.
    • That's the reason why editors exist. Or maybe Gilesbie was just trolling us all with her horrendous spelling.

Stephenie Meyer planned Twilight to prove a point
Stephanie agrees with the haters and critics about the stalking, abusive relationships, and negative connotations around the book. She wrote the book to prove a point about how teenage girls simply don't know what real love is and to prank the majority of her fans into thinking what they are reading is positive role modelling. She wrote it bad on purpose to find out who does and does not critically analyse texts.

It's a grand plan. The biggest, most sincere fans of the book will be the ones she can arrange to have her sparkling vampire son date.

Stephenie Meyer is a Ghoul
The Twilight Saga was written to both protect the Masquerade, and horribly mislead young girls about vampires in order to open up new potential feeding grounds. It was a smashing success.
  • Supernatural did one on this, while serving a few slaps on the side.
  • Brilliant! Why couldn't we see this earlier! we must mobilize the bear cavalry!

Stephenie Meyer is a marketing genius.
Related to one of the ones above. SMeyer started selling her book on a lark, and when it got popular, decided to keep writing, because it's making her fabulously wealthy. She has even created a controversial public persona just for the purpose of drawing in more attention. That, or she's having fun throwing people for a loop.
  • The fact that she literally rewrote Twilight with the genders swapped and barely much more only further adds onto this. Hate her or not, the woman knows how to earn her income.

Stephenie Meyer is J.K. Rowling's Nobody
Rowling writes good Harry Potter books, and Meyer writes bad Twilight books, so she's in the Kingdom Hearts universe.

Stephenie Meyer is a Replica

She has a mentality of a five year old in an adult body. The real Stephenie Meyer died and Mohs created a replica of her from the real Stephenie Meyer's replica data. She only lived for five years and haven't grown mentally unlike Luke.

Stephenie Meyer is a Troll
And the Twilight series is her instrument of trolling.

Stephenie Meyer isn't a real person.
The book was written by a small team in the US Government, in an attempt to create a successful franchise to bring money into the government. Seeing how much money the books and movies have made, and the ridiculous amount of merchandise available (seriously, they have band-aids and hair straighteners with the Twilight image!) it's working. Meyer isn't a real person, she's an actress hired by the government to be the "face", the one to pretend to be the author. Everything about her life and backstory is fabricated.

Stephenie Meyer is Lilith and Twilight Books are promoting Lucifer
Stephenie Meyer body is fat while her head isn't, conclusion? She is pregant all the time. And Lilith is said to bear million children per day Vampires Sparkling? Lucifer Means "light bringer" thats says all
  • Don't insult Lucifer, he may be the embodiment of darkness but he's at least better than this crap.
    • Which is why he and Lilith separated after she decided to give him this "tribute." Needless to say, it was an unhappy Thanksgiving for the kids.

Stephenie Meyer is Hastur
her signature resembles yelow sign slightly ...

Stephenie Meyer is E.L. James
The plot is the same, the styles are the same, so are the characters. What better way then to write a fanfic of your own novel? That way you don't infringe on the copyright. Plus, you get to cash in on the fans' disappointment at the lack of sex in Twilight.
Stephenie Meyer is a real Vampire.
She is pulling a Fright Night Part 2 style scheme in order to make people more tolerant to her race, ergo lowering their defenses so her army of the undead may feed on the living.

Stephenie Meyer's child would go back in time to destroy her
He would go back in time to become an actor and star in a similar adaptation of a vampire book series. he shall raise a fandom of teenage girls to overthrow the dominance of the Twilight book series. And for further insult, he would name his new identity after his unloving mother: "Stephen Moyer".
  • Alternatively, 20+ years from now they'll write what is essentially a Fix Fic of Twilight, which will be considered one of the greatest vampire romance novels of all time. And he/she will do this as the ultimate Take That to Stephenie Meyer, proving that even her own kids are better writers than her, and the infamous reputation of Old Twilight will be replaced by the well-deserved popularity of New Twilight.

Stephenie Meyer is just a normal woman who wanted to write a book series.
    • No, it's true. And this page is incredibly ridiculous. She never intended for her books to be hated so much. No real person should ever be treated this way if they have done no intentional harm. I mean, "Stephenie Meyer's child would go back in time to destroy her?" What the heck are you people thinking?!

Stephanie Meyer became a success through a Jackass Genie.
Not thinking that Twilight would be anything but utterly forgotten pseudo-smut, she made a wish that Twilight would be the one of the most successful romance of all time. Since Meyer never specified the type of success-Twilight mainly became a financial one, with the Jackass part being the extreme Love It or Hate It of Twilight.

Stephenie Meyer got into trouble with trees when she was younger and wrote Twilight as revenge
She either fell from or was attacked by one as a child and wrote her books well knowing that they would be sold in awfully large amounts, meaning the deaths of several trees... Or at least that's what Uncyclopedia suggests.

Stephanie Meyer is afraid of aging and/or death.
Meyerpeyers are filled with Fridge Horror surrounding their life, and in most stories could easily lead to a Who Wants to Live Forever? scenario. Stephanie glorifies a race of immortals, in spite of all that her "heroes" do are eat, mate, fool around sometime spend decades at school. Not just that, but aging is clearly vilified and the vampires take every step to not age(all vampires turned as young adults, retaining the same mentality). Meyer is doing this because she fears the march of time
  • This could actually be true. Meyer's books are incredibly nihilistic, and she has outright admitted to being anti-human by her own words.
Stephanie Meyer hates modern day women.
Notice how her Author Avatar even as a Vampire, is useless without Edward's help?

Stephanie Meyer is one of the Old Ones,
and her clingy, overly-dependent protagonist, and said protagonist's disturbing, nigh-worshipful relationship with her vampire saviour are merely the means to achieve her goal, which has nothing to do with vampires, which are of course entirely fictional, having been invented by her species for PR purposes. The true purposes of Meyer's novels is to promote the basic ideals of that good ole-timey religion to younger and increasingly atheistic generations, for obvious reasons.