Must be Monday. New podcast! Just click on the fancy logo below.
Fifi was the mastermind behind Rumpel.
Fifi was more than a pet to Rumpelstiltskin.
The reason Shrek's father tried to eat him...He was a runt. Listen when he goes to the AU, one of the ogres says he's kind of small. He definitely looks much smaller than them.
Donkey is one of the kids from Pinocchio that drank the potion disguised as beerAll of the other creatures seem to be from a fairy tale or story. In chapters 31 and 32 of Carlo Collodi's The Adventures of Pinocchio, children who stayed in Toyland would turn into donkeys.
Dragon was a pink Pegasus Pony (magic potion) during the events of Shrek 2She was too "ashamed" to leave her cave, which is way she doesn't come to see her husband as soon as the children are born. The little Donkey-Dragons were more than just a few hours old - at least two days. Or three. Or a week.
Shrek's father is also named ShrekOne of Shrek and Fiona's kids is named Shrek in Shrek the Third, thus explaining its title. If this is the case, then the big guy himself must be Shrek II / the Second. Thus, Shrek's father, he who bathed his son in barbecue sauce and put him to bed with an apple in his mouth, must have been Shrek the First, and perhaps even the one from the book, whose adventures are totally different from Movie Shrek's.
Dragon is a transvestite/transsexual or is a hermaphrodite. Donkey only called Dragon a "girl" was because "she" has a feminine appearance. However, considering how things are in the Shrek universe, it's highly possible that (like the Wolf), the Dragon simply as a penchant for "dressing up" (in the matter dragons do) like the opposite gender/sex. An alternate possibility is that Dragon is a hermaphrodite (IE: Having both male and female reproductive organs *Note: You cannot see a male reptile's...erm...naughty parts without closer inspection*) with a feminine personality/appearance. This would explain why "she" was able to have babies.
The Fairy Godmother has a body composed of the tears of her charges, with her true self hidden away somewhere else.She finds weepy princess-types, then uses the tears and emotion as physical and magical components for setting up her Water(tear)-golem Lich bodies. Shrek 4 or 5 will involve a deformed, swampwater-based Fairy Godmother seeking vengeance for Charming's "death" in 3, or as close as doesn't matter after someone unknowingly drops her Soul Jar into Shrek's swamp. And she would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for letting Fiona become a self-reliant dragon-fighting Martial artist. although she could have been trying to prevent that, considering the Queen's skills in 3.
Shrek 3 was simply a combination of bedtime stories told to the kidsThe kids had gotten a little older and demanded bedtime stories from Fiona, Shrek and Donkey, all in different rooms. The three can -just- hear each other, but the kids can't. They build stories based on each other's wild mass improv. This theory explains the low quality of the third film; it was just a mish-mash created by the character's improv and the kid's demands of the stories. "And then, and then, and then there was a shipwreck! And the captain was never seen again! And Rapunzel stinks!"
Shrek Goes Fourth will be about one of Shrek & Fiona's kids going through the original storyOne of their kids wants to become one of KingArthur's knights (double-Aesop points if it's his daughter Felicia) and Shrek is deeply uncomfortable with it, given that knights are usually trying to kill him and/or are Prince Charming.
Neither Farquaad kissing Fiona at their wedding nor Prince Charming kissing Fiona at the ball would have worked to keep her human.Both Fiona's original curse and the "Happily Ever After" potion specify that it has to be TRUE LOVE'S kiss that breaks the spell (curse)/keeps the spell permanent (potion). Fiona and Farquaad were marrying each other out of convenience, not love, so that one's obvious. But I don't think Charming's kiss would have worked either, since if Fiona had taken the potion, she would have been magically induced into falling in love with Charming. That doesn't count as "true" love.
It was Fairy Godmother who cast the curse on Fiona.Fiona says in the first movie that it was a "witch," but how hard do you think it would be for the FG to disguise herself?
Ogres are part frog, part human.Since Fiona's father was a frog despite his human form he still carries frog genes as such Fiona's true form is that of an Ogre her "cure" was actually Fairy Godmother's blessing as it allowed her to have a normal childhood as a human during the day but due to either the Fairy Tale nature of the Fairy Godmother's magic or as an Evil Plan to take control over Far Far Away the "curse" would turn her into the form closest to her true love with their first kiss.
Prince Charming is Artie's FatherThey both have similar hair styles, and are both royalty. So it is possible that Artie is both Charming's son, and Fiona's cousin (yet still have Charming be able to legally marry Fiona) if Fiona's mother had a sister who married Prince Charming (making Charming not biologically-related to Fiona). This may also mean that Charming's real name is Uther Pendragon (the real King Arthur's father).
The fourth movie will include many swipes at One More DayThe plot seems to match up too well to not do it. Given that the owner of their main competition also owns Marvel now...
Sleeping Beauty suffers from narcolepsy.The Real Life condition where you keep falling asleep all of a sudden. Obvious, isn't it?
The fourth movie will not be the last Shrek movie, though it is being set up as such.Just had to put it out there...
The fourth movie will be the last Shrek movie, but not the last Shrek 'Verse movie.The fifth movie will be subtitled "A New Book/Story", both breaking the Numbered Oddly Named Sequels and referencing that it's no longer Shrek's story. It will star either one of Shrek's children (as guessed above), the characters of the alternate FFA fighting against the rise of Rumplestiltskin or another villain, or Shrek's father from the book (who, in a montage at the end of the film, will have and enjoy having a kid but Wangst about having to give him up by ogre law, and will act like an Always Chaotic Evil ogre so Shrek doesn't feel so bad about being abandoned).
Shrek's very existence somehow caused the near-genocide of his species.In the main version of the story, you never see the dozens of other ogres (who would have no reason to hide, what with Shrek's reputation from the first film, him being one of the smallest full-grown ogres, and a distinct lack of King Rumplestiltskin). The only time they appear outside of the It's a Wonderful Plot is in the after-film dance party, which is evidenced by Harold's living portrait to be as non-canon as FFA Idol from the second film (if he could be brought back to life after the beginning of the third film, or was still alive in picture form, it wouldn't have been such a big thing when he croaked [and then subsequently died], and Lillian would have to be at least a little batty [wall-induced brain damage, maybe?] to be acting that way toward a Broad Strokes version of her husband).
Donkey was a jester cursed into being a donkey.This in no way conflicts with him being the donkey from the Bremen Town musicians. It does explain why he's got such a memory for songs and (although it needs no explanation) why he acts like such a fool (no pun intended). He may, in fact, have been a jester in the court of the king and queen of Faerie, after Oberon went back to fetch that funny ass Titania had made of the mortal and turned him all the way into a Donkey.
Donkey is Bottom, from Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream.The spell that was placed on Bottom to make his head look like a donkey's slowly started to effect his whole body, so he ended up looking like a donkey.
AU!Fiona did not free herself from the tower, Rumpels did itNo matter how twisted the contract is, it is still a contract. And you always get what you were promised in it. In this case, the royals of Far Far Away got the freedom of Fiona from the tower. Rumpelstitskin's intervention probably consisted on getting rid of the lava and the dragon (hence why none of them are there when Shrek and AU!Donkey go there later and why Dragon is Rupelstitskin's captive/property in the final act of the movie), thus making Fiona able to escape the tower. Since she had no way to know about the contract, she came to the conclusion that she liberated herself.
In the Shrek Forever After alternate timeline, Charming was killed attempting to rescue Fiona.Shrek beat Charming to the dragon-guarded castle by less than a few months, and Fairy Godmother wanted to keep Fiona there at least until her son arrived. Since Charming didn't rescue her, and neither Charming nor his mother appear in Forever After, something went seriously wrong with their plan. The easiest way Rumpel could assure his throne, removing what would have been dangerous competition in the form of the Fairy Godmother (backed by Charming and Fiona), would be to somehow make sure Charming failed. Devastated by the loss of her son, Fairy Godmother would no longer be a threat.
Duloc was the Wicked Queen's kingdom.After the Wicked Queen's death, Farquaad becomes ruler. This would explain how they got hold of the Mirror.
In Shrek 4, there was one other day Rumpelstiltskin could have taken for great effect.Losing a day implies that the traded day never existed to the character who traded it. Everyone else continues on as if the day was there, but the character seems to be erased from existence that day. As well as any memories of that day being erased. In the movie, Rumple takes the day Shrek was born because it extends the effect for all time. But there was at least one other day Rumple could have taken away that would have caused plenty of problems: the day Shrek met Donkey. Think about it. The day Shrek and Donkey met was also the day (or night as the case was) he started his trek to Du Loc. So, Shrek wouldn't have be able to start the first movie's quest until after that day. Meaning assuming he would still decide to leave his swamp to go to Du Loc, there's no guarantee he even becomes friends with Donkey, which in turns means he might have to deal with Dragon alone. But even if, he still manages to become friends with Donkey and the plot still turns out exactly as it did in the movie or if he manages to save Fiona by himself the damage would be done. Delaying his quest by a single day means the Rumple would succeed in his deal with the King and Queen because it took them until last second to receive the new originally.
The new movie about Puss in Boots will not be set anywhere near Far Far Away.Look at the teaser trailer and you'll see that the humans look slightly cartoonier than in the previous films. Either we're in a different country in the Shrek universe, or the movie is about another of Puss's nine lives and we might not be in the Shrek universe at all.
All of the fairy tale folk not seen in later movies were killed by the villainsThat's why we don't see them anymore.
If their is a sequel to Puss and Boots it will be based on the orginal Puss and Boots storyThe spin-off film was just an orgin story explaing how he became a hero and got his boots, and why he is spanish. If their is a sequel it will have him venturing out of San Ricardo with Kitty Softpaws and finding themeselves in a Far Far Away type kingdom tormented by an evil shapeshifting oger.
A Puss in Boots sequel will feature a plot inspired by a princess tale like The Little MermaidThe villain will be a female who is a queen or a witch trying to take over the kingdom (possibly Far Far Away).
Charming's father died (Possibly like a knight by dragon or monster) or travelled to an alternate dimension.The former comes from the fact that he's never seen, unless this is a case of there's always one parent in fairy tales. The latter comes from the fact that Charming is called Junior at times by Godmother. I assume that his father either still died, or travelled to Disney's Cinderella's dimension while Godmother was pregnant and married Cinderella.
A Puss in Boots sequel would be Darker and Edgier than the first film.The Puss we saw in Shrek 2 was much more hardened, killing ogres for money. Obviously something big happened to him between the first Puss in Boots film and Shrek 2.
Shrek actually does eat peopleAll those eyes in the jars you see lying around have to come from somewhere.
Fiona is actually this universe's BelleThey have the same bangs, and there's no other Beauty and the Beast characters present, except for a small cameo by Cogsworth and Lumiere in Shrek 2. In the third movie, Belle is not a part of Fiona's group of princess friends, even though every other princess is there, even an ugly stepsister. This whole story is basically just a retelling of Beauty and the Beast. Except, this time they end up Beast-Beast instead of Beauty-Beauty.
Between the time of the Puss in Boots Movie and Shrek 2, Kitty Softpaws was killed by an ogrePuss was claimed to be the only one willing to personally go after Ogre bounties in the tavern King Harold goes to, since he has a vendetta towards them after losing her. He was brooding and bad-ass like any other mercenary when first given the job, but soon realized that Shrek isn't like other ogres. That's why he quickly warms up to him and helps him out through the second half of the movie. Maybe even letting go of a grudge towards the ogre race because an evil one killed his love interest.