WMG / Homestuck Jossed Four

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There was only ever one session.
I was rereading some earlier strips, mostly the ones involving the trolls' session. At one point it is pointed out that despite the fact there were two separate teams and units that seemed to suggest two distinct sessions, the eventual twist in the story is that there was always only one session.

Now remember this is a story about self-reciprocation, is it possible that the trolls' sessions and the kids' sessions are connected more than that? The answer occurred to me yes and Cascade seemed to further confirm it. Jack Noir was easily able to transport to the trolls' world using the equipment on Earth.

I thought maybe the original intent of the game is to create the universe that created your universe. Basically, the kids created the trolls' universe and the trolls' created the kids universe. A stable time-loop, but at this point I'm not sure. As in this case these two sessions were necessary for the creation of the Green Sun.

Then I thought, "Due to the fact that the game take place in a timeless zone, perhaps all sessions are taking place simultaneously." Then perhaps that all the sessions are depending on each other for one reason or another. If that's the case maybe all the sessions are just one really huge session at work.
  • Yeah, I've been believing that each universe is really a link in the chain, creating the next... until it becomes a huge (probably infinite) loop.

The battle in the other plane is beyond time.
Under certain conditions what occurs in that other plane always will have been like that. On the bad side, that means the walls of John's room were always vandalized. On the badder side the world is doomed because it is being destroyed, thus will always have had been destroyed.

On the bright side? If John and his allies emerge victorious it will always have had been better.
  • It is beyond time, but that doesn't mean that time is not linear. Earth is doomed no matter what.

Anyone who's not God Tier cannot enter the universe they create.
Vriska was, at the time, the only God Tier troll, so Skaia sent Jack Noir their way to ensure they couldn't enter their new universe. That Karkat talks about his plan to be a "god" in the new universe may back this up. Relatedly, all the post-Scratch kids will end up either God Tier or dead, with the most likely outcomes being "all dead" or "all dead except Jane".
  • Jossed by the language used about the new universes by Hussie. Andrew has referred to players as nascent demigods who end up shaping a universe. The God Tiers are just that, more extreme power and more direct godly parallels, but not strictly speaking a necessary part of the game. Besides, Karkat clearly was capable of opening a door.

Derse Dreamers vs Prospit Dreamers
Derse dreamers are too cynical to really grow up; they are trying too hard to be adults. They need to mature by letting go and enjoying their time left as kids. Prospit dreamers are too idealistic to really grow up; they aren't trying hard enough. They need to mature by wising up and taking responsibility for their lives. These are the "ultimate goals" for the game that Hussie once spoke of, so long ago. This is based off of an analysis of the kids, who it fits best. Some of the trolls cause problems for the theory, as detailed bellow. Note that pre-game personality is all that applies. In- and post-game, we have seen maturation and mellowing towards the middle that sBurb/sGrub seems to be shooting for.
  • Vriska and Nepeta: These two seem to have landed on the wrong planet. They are the biggest problems with the theory. Vriska is totally cynical, Nepeta is totally idealistic, as far as we see. Perhaps Vriska is fantasizing her romances too much (ie, she thinks she's the troll equivalent of a princess waiting for her prince charming)? Nepeta I really can't resolve. Is she too focused on her moirail to focus on herself?
    • Don't forget Feferi is a Derse dreamer. But going with Jossed. There seems to be no correlation between dreamselves and personality. While dreamselves are still rather mysterious, there's far simpler explanations at play for all known sessions. For the Trolls it was broken between the Red Team and Blue Team, and Sollux was an outlier (as he worked heavily with both teams). For the humans, it's simply genetics.
    • Word of God is that it is complicated and hard to distinguish, but could be tied into personality and class. However, he also points out that it's more literally based on the teams and genetics, so Jossed is upheld.

Someone must die in order for a Dream Self to awaken.
From the ones we've seen, Dream John awoke when Dream Jade died, and Derse Dream Sollux awoke when the normal Sollux died. Prospit Dream Sollux may have already been awake (as Sollux references seeing the future), and Sollux was used to kill Aradia, so maybe he woke up when Aradia was killed. Dream Jade may have awoken when Grandpa died. Dream Rose awoke when Future Dream Rose 'ceased to exist' thanks to Future Dave/later Davesprite altering the timeline. Dream Dave has been awake all along but didn't know it, so this is more ambiguous...until you realize that Cal was alive in the Medium and is not when on Earth. Cal must have 'died' in Dave's meteor impact. Dream Terezi is...admittedly something of an abnormality, though it could be said that Aradia's death led to it. Dream Kanaya is referenced as being awake already, but we don't know much about Kanaya before the events immediately preceding the Trolls' Sgrub Session. Dream Vriska awoke immediately after a beatdown by Aradibot, so Normal Vriska may be dead. (This theory was posted soon after the [S] Make her pay Flash, incidentally.) Alternatively, one could also argue that Aradia's death led to it, but that is getting a little overused! Dream Gamzee, Dream Eridan, Dream Feferi, Dream Nepeta, Dream Karkat, Dream Tavros, and Dream Equius remain unexplained, and Dream Aradia does not exist, but it's possible that Sollux may not have been such an abnormal case of Dream Self-awakening after all...
  • Vriska survives (bottom corner) until the end of their session unless she somehow manages to pull a Sollux and come back.
    • Looks that way, since the Vriska that helped to fight the Black King was apparently Dream Vriska. Note the intact vision eightfold.
  • Jossed here: Kanaya's dream self was woken by Doc Scratch.

The ultimate alchemy is...
Creating a new universe. It takes a ton of grist and what could take more grist then that? The ultimate reward is getting to go there and repopulate but if you die against the black king Sburb can just wait until more life pops up.
  • Does this really count as a guess? I figured it was canon, since it's pretty much the only way to interpret the ======> to ==> switchover, and it seems to reflect the general consensus on the 9/18 update.
  • Jossed here: new universes are created by paradox-cloning frogs and breeding the frogs until the frog-god Billious Slick is born.
  • I thought the Ultimate Alchemy WAS the breeding of the Genesis Frog. Early on when John notices the cloning equipment Karkat or Vriska says its part of the Ultimate Alchemy. So wouldn't this be confirmed?

The Mediums are actually the afterlife.
There seems to be a mild heaven/hell motif going on, and it would certainly explain Grandpa Harley's appearance.
  • Jossed; the afterlife is in the Furthest Ring, which is equidistant from all sessions.
    • And that in and of itself seems to be a temporary afterlife before a real one.

The Ultimate Alchemy is the process of bringing back Skaia.
Or, in other words, bring back the Earth. Because, really, what else would take that much grist that recreating an entire planet full of life. Now, the trolls have already played the game, and they lost, which makes them the last of their kind. Earth is already doomed, as Nannasprite would not lie (I think.) The reward for all of this would have to be something good. The congratulations for beating the game is the ability to recreate your world, but in your image. The Guardians have played the game before, which is why the are that strong- the would have had to have been to beat the game. Them beating the game is also why the Earth is still around, obviously. Now, it is their job to pass on their genes to then next set of players.
  • Jossed, making a universe.

All the paradoxes and weird self-fulfilling prophecies are Sburb's fault. Because it is sentient.
Everything that has happened in the story and everything that will happen is already predetermined; we're not seeing events as they play out, we're seeing an edited version of everything, a final product with some bad cut-and-paste jobs and maybe some jpeg artifacts. If that reminds you of anything. There's enough to see that it wasn't always this way but the introduction of Sburb changed it all, messing with reality, tying itself around Earth with intricate little knots of time and space and now it's totally inseparable. The planet now exists only because the kids needed to live there in order to play the game, and now that Earth has outlived its usefulness as a breeding ground for players it's gone. In the original timeline, they were just four unrelated internet friends playing a game. Now they are not, because the game rewrote their pasts to connect itself to them. Sburb needs the kids to play it for some reason that is unknown at this time, maybe just to continue existing and preying on other planets (maybe the reason life exists on any planet at all is because of its machinations?).

Basically Sburb is a somewhat sentient reality-warping godparasite thing that may or may not be intrinsically malicious. It might end up being the Final Boss. Beating it would be like literally punching reality in the face.
  • Corollary: The kids realizing this and rebelling against the game and their kernelsprites was what Andrew had originally planned for the 4/13 update.
    • No, it wasn't.
  • Jossed. Sburb is just the portal to the incipisphere, it's not really that important in the scheme of things.

There is no "real world." Skaia, the Medium, and Earth have co-existed for millions of years. The kids have been playing the game since birth.
Sburb itself is nothing more than a reality manipulator. Since the meteors in the Veil, upon hurtling toward Skaia, are redirected through space and time through defense portals, it is extremely probable that the babies John created in the ectobiology lab all find their way to appropriate points via these meteors. Also consider that the kids have been using captchalogue cards and sylladexes well before Sburb was installed on John's and Rose's computers, and the exiles all lack sylladexes; they and strife specibi are facets of the Homestuck universe as a whole, and are not necessarily related to Sburb. The kids are literally fighting to save the world from destruction, not to just survive their instance and return to a "real world" like in Problem Sleuth.
  • Confirmed-ish but Jossed in principle. Skaia isn't unique to the Kids after all.

Basically every session except the Alpha/Beta ones are Troll sessions. There are only humans at all because Karkat/Kanaya skipped the last frog
UU can't see into the Alpha session because of Roxy, but she implies that she can see into just about every other session. When she draws god-tier Dirk she sticks the god-tier-troll wings on him, which implies that she's only ever seen trolls reach the god tier, which would imply that any other session with humans either A) gets blacked out or B) never gets any god tiers or C) are uncommon enough that UU's never seen them.
  • What seems to have been implied is that Humanity has gone extinct since the end of the Alpha Session or else they live completely apart from Trolls, possibly even in another universe entirely. UU doesn't seem to have observed many sessions though, and her research instead seems to be in a historical sense. While it's unknown why trolls are so dominant later, Humans certainly didn't evolve solely because of Kanaya and Karkat's mistakes, as dozens of species evolve in universes created by Sburb, and the Trolls themselves are the products of a 48 player session of unknown species.
    • Oh Hussie how you managed to bait us so.

The future is mutable.
Dave, the Knight of Time, has already traveled back over four months to prevent the Bad Future of John and Jade (presumably) dying prematurely, significantly changing the timeline of the game. The future involving the exiles is accepted as canon, implying that the world will inevitably become a wasteland, but this is not set in stone as long as Dave is alive. We may be treated to a Tarantino, wherein Dave finds a reason to change the future again and a montage shows the relevant changes to already-revealed events such as the exiles' actions.
  • Related: The future is only immutable when you play by the rules. The one time the future was changed was when a character intentionally broke the rules (John going for the seventh gate early). The toy bunny doesn't count as breaking the rules because Jade never attempts to get anyone to do anything but follow the script (but with a powerful item to help). Rose is now going Off the Rails, so may be able to actually affect an outcome.
  • Jossed, it just folded into the alpha timeline.

A character's inventory system is more or less tied to the technological level of their society
The more-or-less prohibition-era shenanigans of Problem Sleuth and the Midnight Crew have a classic adventure game inventory, with easy access to items but finite storage space. The kids (And apparently everyone else from their time) have capchatalog cards, which are less convenient but more versatile. The exiles, who have no real civilization, are reduced to "pick it up and carry it."
  • Adding to this, the kids, who were born post-computerization, all have sylladexes, while Dad has to resort to carrying around captchalouge cards with him.
  • Probably jossed, the Trolls use esoteric moduses that range from kinda high tech to very lowtech.

Every session ends up sending out one of those remote-control data storage whatsits out into the Furthest Ring.
For the humans, it contains Rose's walkthrough, intended to aid past and future Sburb players. For the Trolls, it was the virus that spawns Lord English, which (will eventually/already has/may or may not) destroy the universe. What they contain mirrors which race sent them out.
  • A guide written by people who lose mirrors humanity?
    • A guide meant to help others mirrors humanity. A program meant to destroy the ones who wrote it mirrors the trolls.
    • Jossed.

Kissing a corpse without a dream self will make them into the undead
]]== Nice Job Making It Worse, Heroes.
  • Which would nicely fit with all the "don't turn your back on the body"- business.
  • At the point Homestuck is at right now (6/29/11), Karkat says "IT WAS. A MOTHERFUCKING. JOKE." This is a direct line Gamzee said earlier, which may mean that Gamzee has now killed Karkat, Sollux and Kanaya and is now using Karkat's Trollian account to fool John 0_0
    • Except, why would Terezi avert Karkat's death at the hands of Noir, only for him (and possibly Terezi too) to die at the hands of Gamzee?
  • Jossed. Kanaya is special, ordinarily it does nothing. Otherwise Tavros would have turned undead as well.

Every last character in Homestuck (save for Dad/Mr. Egbert, the Kids and Trolls) is actually an AI in Sburb, which is really a front for Lord English's crimes.
Bear with me, please. I know where I'm going with this.

We know that John created all of the Guardians and the Kids (including himself) via paradox cloning, and sent them to different eras to make sure that he'd even be able to do all of this in the first place. We also know Karkat did so as well for the Trolls, and that according to him at least one person per non-null session would do so in order to make the players involved. The point that this brings up is that if all this is true, then it would imply that they were always in the game in the first place. Nobody who was in a Sburb session simply entered it; they returned.

However, this doesn't mean that the Kids and Trolls were hard-coded into the simulation; it is just as likely that they're actual people (in a 4:12 split by certain differences that get exaggerated in the simulation) who Lord English has targeted for his own agenda. From this, then, he created an entire simulation to confuse them and make them believe that Sburb was reality, complete with fake Guardians who seem to care for them more than their actual legal guardians would, and a fake Internet that somehow works even when all means of getting connected are seemingly severed. Even the other players Karkat was talking about are really NPCs to give an illusion of community. For this, he could easily exploit their misfortunes and add to his power, making sure that everyone remains unaware.

The First Guardians are also creations of English. The key difference is that they have more power than any other AI in Sburb, even more than the Black King, so it stands to reason that English would use them as moderators to make sure the players stay in line. It seems that he'd create Doc Scratch first, as the twelve Trolls were (if Alternia coming before Earth was just covering for it) the first victims of his simulation, and weren't particularly resistant. As for the four Kids, they seemed to be more so, especially one of them who seemed to be more aware than English hoped. So through various machinations, he created a second First Guardian to moderate the four newer Kids and keep their threat level down.

As for Mr. Egbert? He wasn't involved in the paradox cloning at all. This means that he is outside the time loops, and by extension from outside Sburb. It remains to be seen just who exactly he is, how he ended up in Sburb, and what his motivations were to enter it.

In short, Lord English created Sburb to continue his criminal activity and torture sixteen kids with illusions of reality. "Mr. Egbert" may or may not stop him.
  • This is stupid. Jossed.

Sburb is a representation of events that happened eons ago, in a long-dead universe
The planets, Derse and Prospit included, are mirrors of planets that existed in that universe, and Skaia was a source of great power located in the center. The black-carapaced beings from Derse wanted to take it as their own, but the white-carapaced Propites wanted equilibrium in the universe, so they tried to protect it. While the two worlds warred on the planet the power rested on (represented by the battlefield), the other races tried to stay out of it... until one day, a young frog named Bilious Slick decided to stop the war. He rallied all of the other planets to his side, but it only brought the wrath of the Dersians upon them. But they persevered, and Slick and his compatriots eventually assassinated the Black King and Queen, stopping the war. Sadly, it was too late for most of the universe; entire planets were burned bare and whole races were wiped out. Slick and his army, together numbering 1025, were all that was left of civilization. In despair, they turned to the great power and tried to recreate their world as it once was. But the power could not recreate; it could only create new things. Slick and his friends then created the Medium, the Incipisphere, Skaia, and a whole new universe that would be infinitely connected to them. If the new universe came to face such a peril as theirs, there would be a relatively easily accessible way to start over.

Slick put in the Frog Temples as a "signature" of sorts, a sign that he had once existed. The races on the planets are copies of those that allied with Slick and the frogs. The Dersians and Prospites are identical because they had all died when the new universe was creates, so Slick based them off of gamepieces from a game that is as old as existence itself.
  • So Lord English is a frog that went rogue?
    • Lord English was never meant as part of the game, but is rather a glitch in the system, perhaps caused by the Medium copying itself so many times, causing it to be permanently warped... rather like JPEG compression.

  • Jossed.

The Beat Mesa is half of a massive pair of Timetables.
They're fairly similar, aesthetically. Eventually, the kids will use them as part of their plan to meet up with the trolls - they'll use them to warp the entire Land of Heat and Clockwork into the troll's universe, take them aboard (as it were), and then warp back, ready to wreck Jack's shit with four times the party size.
  • Jossed, but partially correct. By scratching it, John will cause a massive release of time energy and hard reboot the game.

There are fake copies of The Tumor
John will find at least one of these copies. Then he will then throw it away in disgust, realising that, in fact it's not The Toomah.
  • Jossed.

The game is designed to screw you over... if you try to cheat.
While not explicitly mentioned as such, there are two instances, the Bad Future and the current Time Line, of the game becoming so messed up that it may well be Unwinnable.
  • John uses a Jetpack to jump ahead into his 7th gate, and (presumably) dies soonafter. This means he can't get Jade to enter the game, and the game is presumed Unwinnable by Dave and Rose.
  • Jade, seeing a vision of a crying John, send him Game-Breaker to help him in his time of need. When Jack Noir gets his hand on it, the end result is that the Reckoning is kicked off far earlier than it should have been, ultimately resulting in the crying scene the present was meant to comfort.
In both instances, it's due to the fact that somebody tried to cheat the game for an easy win. The lesson here? DON'T FUCKING CHEAT.
  • The irony is that, without the jetpack and Fear No Anvil, John would never have got those paradox clone babies launched before the kids' brought-forward Reckoning. Two wrongs make a right?
    • The jetpack might be a borderline case, where flying over encounters deprives you of experience you might need later, and the hammer's code was earned legitimately in an already-doomed future, so between that and the necessity of the paradox clones, the game might have been lenient enough to let that slide.

The Gods of the Furthest Ring are simply trying to help the kids.
And Rose is not simply insane, as people have been guessing.
  • Dave could hear them too (but chose not to because he thought they were kind of creepy, especially the ones that sing), so Rose is definitely not nutty in the sense that she's hallucinating them, and that also means they are not specifically targeting her either.
    • Not to mention their sole known-to-the-audience suggestion at least sounded like a really good idea...
      • Mind you, just because they aren't evil, doesn't mean prolonged contact with them and using the Thorns of Oglogoth isn't subtly doing things to Rose's mind. Blowing up Gate 1 wasn't their idea, after all.
      • They are evil, probably.

Sburb is actually TWO games.
The first is the one the Kids and the Trolls played, where you attempt to build up to Skaia. The other is a chess-themed game between Derse and Prospit, that the players are meant to alter, but not interact with directly. The goal of reaching Skaia is there so the players can repair the ruined world after Black has won, which the player's side has given ample experience in.
  • Not especially; the Trolls interacted heavily in the game and any player can go to the Battlefield and personally fight in the war.

The number of players in a session continues to diminish until the end of the multiverse.
Let's run with that implication that there were 48 players in the session that created the trolls' universe (based on their number of astrological signs). So we have:
  • 48 -> 12
  • 12 -> 4
First a division by 4, then by 3. Now let's pretend that this is enough to establish a pattern. The factor would continue to diminish by one with each subsequent session. This implies, first of all, that there were 240 players in the session before the one that created the trolls' universe (48 x 5 = 240), and 1,440 in the one before that (240 x 6 = 1440)! But second, if we carry this "logic" forward further, a universe created by a successful (i.e. post-scratch reset) version of the kids' session would have only two players (4 / 2 = 2) - most likely a Hero of Space and a Hero of Time, as speculated above. And after that, another two player session (2 / 1 = 2), with a similar lineup. But... then what? The factor can't go down any further, right? Oh, but it can. The equation to determine the next session would destroy all existence: two, divided by zero.
  • The next session will have an infinite number of players. As long as n is not 0, n/0=∞.
  • Wait, no, the next session will have two players: Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff. They will play a game of SBAHJ, where they will find out that Sweet Bro is the Bro of Time and Hella Jeff is the Jeff of Space. Sweet Bro's guardian is his mom, Jeff's is Geromy, and the imps will (after an ill-advised prototyping with... I dunno, a stuffed squirrel or some such) take on the form of squirrels that try to steal their game discs. Jeff will dream on Prospit, where Skaia's clouds will show him visions where he is the star (it's him) and he has to challenge the Big Man (the Black King). Meanwhile, Sweet Bro, the Derse dreamer, will fall under the control of the horrorterrors (hot gods) and do their bidding (put... jelly on them. Whatever). Jeff will use the sockkind abstratus, with which he will create....... DISTACTIONS, while Bro will attempt to use both rulerkind and spoonkind but utterly fail to get the hang of either... man, I could go on for hours.
    • Or as stated above, the next session will be Mobius and Hadron's, and the corresponding numbers will be 2:14, for reasons both outlined here and listed on (as of this writing) the first WMG on the page.
  • Or we could simply say, no probably not. Andrew for instance has left open that other human sessions escaped up to whatever number you feel like, and the rebooted session the Kids will be in will have 8 players via technicality. Extrapolation from 3 points, including one that has only been referenced once is a bit silly don't you think.

There is a wrong number of players in one or both Sburb sessions
This is actually two WMG, but mostly consist in the idea that the number of players in the Sburb/Sgrub games is “wrong”, causing the problems that the characters face, it can be either just the Kids game or the Trolls game, or both.

The Kids number of players is two short

This caused the glitchs in the game, among other things the shorter spam of time before reckoning and mixed roles (for example the Page of Breath and the Heir of Void are combined in the Heir of Breath A.K.A. John), causing the game malfuction
  • This doesn't even make sense. Titles aren't set in stone.

The Troll numbers of players is too short

The Arc Number is Four-Thirteen, Four kids and Thirteen trolls, but they are missing one troll or maybe a extra player that might appear later that will join the game, but connect itself with the trolls session.
  • The Troll's Arc Number is Six-Twelve. There were twelve six-solar sweep old trolls.

The Troll number of players is too big

It can be assumed that more prototypes = more powers to the Black Royals, making the almost impossible game for the trolls. This caused the game too "crash"
  • No their predecessors had 48. The trolls were just bitching.

The SBURB games are counting down.
  • The special number in the Troll's game? 612. 6+1+2= 9. The Kid's game? 413. 4+1+3= 8. My guess is, there can only be 7 games after this.
    • 214?
    • Alpha is 11 11 11 or 2X3 either way thats 6 so maybe it's not exactly in order, what with the timey-whimey and whatnot.
      • Unless the 7th game was the one that "created" the Alpha session. At least, we know UU is or has been in a session of her own.
      • Jossed by UU's exposition; after the Alpha Session, trolls go on to play Sburb many more times.

The Heir/Page/Etc of Breath not only has power over wind, but can breathe life back into people as well.
This might explain why "the windy thing" effect was seen coming out of Tavros' mouth when he tried to revive Vriska. It may also explain how John sees his father again the way Vriska said he would.
  • No, that's inherent to any player. The windy thing from Tavros was simply him using his own powers.

The Hero of Life's function
Two theories here, one versus the other:
  • The Hero of Life is incapable of being killed outside the Medium, at least once. This would mean that Feferi and HIC's abilities to resist the Vast Glub were not connected to their blood, but rather to their roles as the Hero of Life. This would also mean that Jane miraculously survives the explosion.
  • The Hero of Life is the first to die in each session, and must continue their work from their dreamself or dream bubbles to ensure the survival of the other players. As none of the players were killed in the Trolls' session during the course of the game, Feferi's death was unnecessary; she was, however, the first troll to be killed in the Medium. Jane's explosion may lead to her playing the rest of the game as her dreamself, leading to the revival of Jake's.
    • Jane did survive the explosion, though through God-Cat's interference. It seems the second theory is Jossed, as Sollux died due to the Vast Glub or Aradia died due to Vriska's machinations, depending on how you define the session.
  • Jossed: Life is merely an aspect focusing on healing or vitality. Different classes can interpret this in entirely different ways, as shown with Meenah, Feferi, and Jane.

    Skaia, Horrorterrors, Denizens and Bilious Slick 

Skaia is sentient-and the villain of the story.
It is stated that Skaia will catch some of the meteors with portals, which, as theorized above, may be the ones that hit Earth and other planets with Sburb sessions. However, this is only possible because there were Sburb sessions-otherwise, there would be a stalemate between Prospit and Derse. In other words, Sburb is launching meteors at inhabited planets (instead of, say, stars) to save itself from meteors that were only launched because of its actions. Skaia isn't a place of wonder. It's an Eldritch Abomination that is playing a game, at the price of hundreds of billions of lives. The chess motifs, the playing card motifs, even the nature of Sburb... they all hint at the worldview of Skaia. So, you may ask, why do the trolls say it's so essential that The Reckoning is stopped? Because, in truth, Skaia isn't in any danger. The meteors won't destroy it, they'll just make it throw a tantrum. And that tantrum would destroy the universe.
  • So (probably writing from much later), Skaia is Lord English?
  • Jossed, Skaia is basically the closest thing to a benevolent god. However the Elderterrors are close to the original idea.

Skaian portals are able to send objects trans-Scratch
Right here: http://www.mspaintadventures.com/scratch.php?s=6&p=005953 , mostly in the third and fourth paragraphs. All 48 trolls and ancestors were birthed in the post-scratch session. Not only that, but such an event occurring is the "calling card" for Lord English's arrival in the post-scratch session. Since Lord English is implied to have conquered multiple sessions, this must happen fairly often. Thus, it is possible, plausible, and basically confirmed, that a post-scratch session's ectobiology session can send paradox clones back to a pre-scratch session, and from there it is not much of a leap to determine that a pre-scratch session would be able to send stuff to a post-scratch session. I mean, if Jake can sit there warping pumpkins from other sessions all day, I'm sure skaia could do it without blinking.
  • Jossed at least partially via several mistaken assumptions: Karkat said he only made 24 grubs and English's calling card is specifically that players were not created in their session, which doesn't specifically mean they were made in another session. Likewise, there's been no indication Skaia can transport things across universes; it seems to be limited to the Exile's terminals and whatever process Jake and Jade are using, which is probably similar given their tech comes from the Medium.
    • And Jossed via Rose's exposition. In the Human sessions, and presumably the Troll ones, only 8 babies were made. However, they were sent to two points in time, and the resulting differences created an alternate universe. From Skaia's perspective, the two sessions aren't cause and effect, but simply two alternative paths.

Skaia/SBURB will actively attempt to prevent "winners" from entering their created universe
This is likely because having god powered individuals entering newborn realities would cause only destruction, not creation. The psychology of Gods is delved into in the "Be Jack Noir" section, where he thinks "You wonder if it will always be like this. What sort of future does a new god have to look forward to? Will this malaise follow you for eternity? Will you be perpetually tempted to destroy everything you see, knowing that in just a few moments of recklessness, you will be left with nothing else to destroy forever? What will eternity feel like when a single moment of boredom feels like an eternity unto itself?"

Doesn't seem like having Gods directly involved would be very conducive to the maturation of a new Universe.
  • None of the players are gods, so much as demigods. Jack isn't one of the kids anyways, he's completely insane and blows up planets for fun.

  • You are assuming that the trolls "won". The final boss may not be the final task, the riddle probably is. You know the one they were "too good" to even bother finding out in the first place.
    • Except Karkat for some reason but he's being all coy about it.
      • They didn't, because of Karkat's impatience.

There are only two universes.
And SBURB keeps life cycling back and forth endlessly between them as a way of keeping Lord English trapped. At any given time one of the universes is inhabited by exiles from the last game session whose job is to rebuild the world, and the other contains the descendants of the last group of players (who presumably also interbreed with the exiles who fixed it up and their progeny to make repopulation more feasible, even better if there's something about the exiled game characters that wards off the negative effects of inbreeding until either the exile blood gets too diluted or people start to evolve away from their roots), except for current Earth which is populated entirely by the descendants of the exiles from two game sessions back because the trolls never got in.

Whenever the currently active universe reaches a point where the forces of entropy are about to take over and slowly drag it all downhill to the end of the universe and LE's release, instead SBURB activates and clears things out so the universe will be rebuilt instead, flipping things around so instead of entropy taking over creative energy surges. And the surviving original life from that world gets to move onto the fully restored other homeworld, after they've played through the game and proven that they're strong enough to face whatever the past exiles have built up there. If they aren't strong enough, well, humanity proves that repopulation will go on anyway.

When they reach the end of the game they only think that the ultimate alchemy they use is creating a new universe. In truth it's creating the door to let them through it, and their very own constellations as a kind of trophy to mark that they've beaten the game. (Mortal minds are incapable of grasping just how enormous the amount of grist needed to create a whole universe would be, so they look at the already mind-bogglingly huge amount needed to create a few star systems and assume that with a number that massive it just has to be a whole universe that they're making!)
  • Jossed.

The outer gods didn't have Rose destroy the journals to try and prevent Bec's creation
They did it to force DD? to use Dave's copies, to make sure Jade got his Sburb beta discs. That also explains why they didn't do it in the Bad Future: With John dead, the beta discs were useless to her and the paradox of her helping Dave enter was eaten for breakfast.
  • No they genuinely tried it. And did the above. At the same time. It's confusing.

The Noble Circle of Horrorterrors were the players that created the Troll universe
They became its gods, put Gl'bgolyb on one planet to act as an emissary (maybe even on some more planets?), and somehow learned to contact Rose in the kids' session as well.

The Horrorterrors are
Players from previous sessions who migrated into the created Universes upon completing their game of SBURB. Their alien geometries are a side effect of their Godhoods and the twisted laws of the Furthest Ring. Alternatively, they are players from Failed Sessions, banished beyond reality as their Incinisphere deteriorates.
  • This doesn't even make sense, there's nothing in canon to support it.
  • Well, thanks for that judgement. It is a pretty wild Mass Guess, but still, it's a pretty cool idea.
    • Doesn't seem to be the case as of later canon. The Trolls and half of the kids seem to be hanging out in the Furthest Ring with no serious repercussions.
      • Throwing under Jossed because there's loads of evidence against it and nothing for it. The Wild doesn't have to be literal you know! There's a fine line between throwing out a silly theory and suggesting something that's so unlikely it's kinda dumb.

Skipper Plumbthroat is a subconscious representation of Grandpa Harley.
Also posted on the MSPA IDE/Theory thread. After Grandpa Harley learned how scared Jade is/was/will be (depending on what part of the timeline we's in) of the Gods of the Furthest Ring, he decides to voyage behind the Veil and teach them a lesson or two. Though the Horrorterrors see him as a pathetic, weak mortal with his own problems (as exaggerated by Plumbthroat), they still see him as a threat. He's just that badass.
  • That is so awesome that I want it to be true.
    • He's apparently the representation of whatever's killing the horrorterrors which is probably Jack.

In the kid's session, The Gods of the Furthest Ring are the trolls, and Beq is loyal to them.
Makes sense to me. I mean, they did make the universe. They probably only destroyed the code because they thought he'd become loyal to Lord English.
  • Jossed. The Gods of the Furthest Ring are various horrorterrors, and the Furthest Ring itself is not unique to sessions since it connects all of them.

The Gods of the Outer Ring are the Final Boss
They come from beyond the orbit of Derse, where the sky is forever dark, and they seethe with malice towards all manifestations of creative potential (but especially those products of creativity that manifest as dna strings necessary for the survival of the world.)

If you can be mindfucked by these creatures just by looking at the sky on Derse, then the entire planet is under their malign influence. They are the true power behind the dark throne, and the source of its strength. No wonder Light always loses — Dark was receiving pieces from off the board!

Dave is a 'Prince of the moon'. The gods want a 'royal audience'. With King and Queen dead, Dave is the next in the line of succession. This the 'worst thing you could ever do': disrupting the course of the game badly enough that a player falls under the influence of individuals the want to smash the board and burn the pieces.

  • Corollary: Rose has already been "possessed" by these forces, while Dave is immune because he's never looked up into the night sky of Derse without his sunglasses on. This explains why Rose seemingly went off the deep end (or the "dark end") after her Future Dream Self fused with her - since it happened, she's already created weapons of dark magic (from a tome she wouldn't use as a weapon earlier because it was too evil) and blown up her gate.
    • Beyond blowing up her gate on a whim, what evidence do we have (that isn't cicumstantial) that Rose is losing it? The tome had instructions on BRINGING the Outer Ring Gods to the summoner. The Thorns just channel magic and the eldritch powers of one such god. Just playing Devil's advocate here...
  • The BK and BQ are the final bosses, the elderterrors are just the side that advises them. They're evil but unfought by a normal session.

The horrorterrors are actually Bilious Slick.
That is to say, they are universes created by past sessions. Every session of SBURB is in fact a Horrorterror spore (or something) and while Bilious looks AT FIRST to be a frog..... seriously, how does a frog become the universe?
  • He contains the universe inside himself.
  • This would explain what's killing them.
    • Ah yes the progenitor frog natural predator of the tentacled space horror. Actually wait this being Homestuck that makes a lot of sense. Perhaps Skipper Plumbthroat is the Kid's frog?
  • B. Slick lives in the remains of Skaia, so he seems to be the exact opposite of what this WMG describes.

Skaia's true purpose is to somehow defeat Lord English.
Okay, with Doc Scratch more or less confirmed as the Felt's Cue Ball, this logically leaves Lord English as the Cue Stick. Pool theme FTW and all. But wait, isn't Pool a two-player game? Who would Lord English be playing against? Surely it must be something as vague and inscrutable as Lord English himself, something like... The Ultimate Riddle. Thus the true purpose of the game is to somehow answer the ultimate riddle, and discern how Lord English can be defeated.
  • Skaia's true purpose is to create more universes.

Skaia exists to summon Lord English
Think about it. It results in The End of the World as We Know It, which is the condition for his summoning. It creates the First Guardians, who appear to be loyal to him, and consider this part of facilitating the universe's ultimate purpose.
  • Skaia exists to create universes. Derse creates the guardians.

The Kids' Denizens are Magical Girls.
In order of appearance in the animation: Blue, violet, green and yellow side by side, and then red/pink. Jade gets the blue one, Rose gets violet, John has to fight the green and yellow because he changed his chumhandle from GT -> EB, and Dave gets the red/pink one. It would also be incredibly silly.
  • Nope.

A part of Bilious Slick survived Jack's attack
You can clearly see his hand is still intact. It'll either be used to resurrect him or somehow create a new frog.
  • Rendered irrelevant by UU's explanation of the Genesis Frog. He contains all alternate universes.

Jake's Denizen will be Erebus.
In the original session, John's was Typheus (sometimes called the "Father of all Monsters") while Jade's was Echidna, the "Mother of all Monsters". In the Alpha Session, Jane's Denizen is Hemera, personification of day; therefore, Jake's will be the opposite: Erebus, personification of darkness. (Nyx would also be possible, except Denizens seem to always be the same gender as their player.)
  • If John and Jade's Denizens were counterparts, then wouldn't Jake's Denizen be Aether (Personification of Light/Male counterpart of Hemera), not Erebus? Perhaps Bro's will be Erebus and Mom's will be Nyx.
    • Not necessarily: Dave's Denizen was Hephaestus, not another monster opposite Cetus. While Jake's may bear one of these relations, Bro's and Mom's don't need to.
      • Why would Erebus correspond to Hope at all? Also Haphaestus was male while Aradia was female.
    • Mom's Denizen is confirmed to be Nix
    • Jake's Denizen is Abraxas, drawing from Gnosticism like Yaldabaoth.
Dog-Tier Jade will fuse her Battlefield with the Alpha Session's Battlefield to bring it up to Level 8.
The Battlefield "levels up" each time a player enters the session. Since the God-Tier Kids will be in the Alpha Session, there will be eight players, so the Battlefield should level up eight times. However, the Kids have already prototyped their Sprites and leveled up their own Battlefield, and the Alpha Kids will only bring it up to Level 4. The remaining four levels will come from the God-Tier Kids' Battlefield, which Jade brought with her.
  • Alternately, the Alpha Session won't have a Battlefield until Jade brings hers... but her battlefield is in pretty rough shape and it's not clear if it's possible for it to level up more times, especially if it's not in the same session when some of the alpha kids arrive.
    • Original theory jossed, alternate theory semi-confirmed. There was a battlefield, but CD blew it up.

     The Finale 

The very final page of the comic is named "[S] Kids: Ascend"
"A realm where four will gather, the Heir of Breath and Seer of Light, the Knight of Time and Witch of Space, and together they will Ascend." Sure, Rose is actively fighting against this now, and even the other kids don't seem particularly enthusiastic about it, but... hey, all the best stuff in the comic have come from when the pages are called "Ascend," and it's the very purpose of the game, so...?
  • WMG Number two: The final page will be named "[S]Sburb:End" of "[S]Homestuck:End" or similar.
    • "[S]John:Reunite with loving wife and daughter".
  • The last page will be epilogue so probably not ascend. Considering they'll be grandparents by then.
  • Probably Jossed. All four kids are God Tier already.

The very last page of Homestuck will be scratched out and unreadable by the damages on disc 2.
Dammit, Terezi!
  • Weeeell, sorta? Homestuck is broken right now, that's why we brought the disc to someone to get it fixed…
    • Yeah, straight up Jossed now, probably because it was a real pain for Andrew to draw the messed up graphics.

There will be Thirteen groups of Four member parties in Homestuck once is all said and done.
  • Certain
    • John, Rose, Dave and Jade
    • Wandering Vagabond, Peregrine Mendicant, Aimless Rogue and Windswept Questant
    • The Guardians
    • The Four Kernalsprites
  • Prospective
    • A group for each of the kid's enemy factions.
      • The Midnight Crew, for John
      • Four surviving members of the Felt, for Jade or Rose?
      • ______, for Dave
      • ______, for whoever isn't getting the Felt.
      • This could extremely easily tie further into the four types of Grist: John and the pitch-black Midnight Crew work with Oil, Jade and the glowing-green Felt will work with Uranium, Rose and (god forbid) ever-so-pale Team Sleuth will work with Chalk, and Dave and... someone work with amber.
    • Four main trolls, one for each kid. There are 12 trolls, but so far only four (cG, gC, gA, aT) have chatted and appeared in person in the comic.
      • It's possible the four trolls revealed thus far are foils to the main characters (cG = John, gC = Jade, gA = Rose, aT = Dave).
  • Jossed, Andrew's confirmed that Act 6 will not have nearly as many characters and Acts 4 and 5's boom in characters was always meant to wind down.

Derse will be destroyed in the final confrontation.
Okay, not exactly wild, but if the "frog-temple foreshadowing" is going to pay off completely, well... A fully-prototyped Jack will be slinging about a hell of a lot of firepower (not that he hasn't already) and will be an absolute bear to fight. And on the possibility that the kids do emerge victorious, what RPG final bosses of that caliber don't explode spectacularly?
  • Jossed.

The finale will be fully voice casted
Because, hey, how else can you make the ending even more awesome?
  • Andrew has jossed any official voice work. How else would you make the ending incredibly difficult to animate and have to deal with voice actor try outs and bullshit.

The Final Battle
will involve all characters introduced thus far, and more importantly, will follow problem sleuth's style of taking viewer input.
  • Probably not considering a fair number of characters are dead and are not coming back.

Andrew Hussie is saving Octoroon Rangoon for the final battle with Jack Noir
Just listen to it. It's quite obviously a far more frantic remix of Jack Noir's theme. At the very least, it will be used for Jack being involved with something epic.
  • Octoroon Rangoon was used in the flash of Dream Dave and Rose dancing. That's a Jossed.

Lord English's peg leg will be an Achilles' Heel in the Final Battle.
The leg stump is visibly bleeding, so Lord English may not be so invincible after all.
  • Jossed. Hussie has said his one weakness is apparently Doc Scratch's gun.

Andrew is going to somehow use each and every one of these theories.
What? There's precedent for it.
  • Yeah, except at this point there have probably been more jossed theories than confirmed ones.

Homestuck will end on the 2nd of February 2011.
The 2nd of February 2011 will be 1025 days since Homestuck started. 413 + 612 = 1025. Seems a reasonable guess. Plus it would fit in the current estimate that it will last somewhere over two years. Either that or it'll finish on the 1st of February because that would be the 1025th day.
  • Hussie has more or less stated at this point that trying to keep to some strict schedule is completely impossible for him, so I doubt it.
    • Obviously, completely Jossed by now.
    • As of 2016, this prediction was off by five years and thirty-nine days.

The story will end by the kids breaking the prophecy and saving the world
  • Nope. Earth's boned has been, was, and will be. They can't change that.

The finale will feature a massive battle, involving the kids, the guardians, and the exiles
Specifically, John, Rose, Dave, Jade, Dad, Mom, Bro, Grandpa, Warweary Villein, Parcel Mistress, Authority Regulator, White Queen, and Bec vs. Jackspers Noirlecrow, Draconian Dignitary, Hegemonic Brute, and Courtyard Droll. Note that this battle pits a team of 13 vs a team of 4.
  • Well there's a lot of joss considering like half the list is dead or doomed.

Homestuck will end with the characters destroying the paradox, preventing the events of Homestuck from ever having happened, waking up in new lives and simultaneously experiencing a profound philosophical revelation:
Everything they have ever done has been a complete waste of time.
  • Then J would never have been born.

The group will defeat Lord English by prototyping nanna with David's Sord
Because this would be hilarious and ironic.
  • Can't triple prototype.

Have we forgotten Jade's accidental Humongous Mecha code?
It may be expensive, it might even be a Red Herring, but having a giant robot could seriously even the odds in the final battle.
  • She also has the code to make Johnny 5, which is probably not helpful, but would make a nice schlock-movie present for John.
    • The "giant mecha" is just a toy.
    • A toy, huh? So, that's what she alchemises with the Con Air bunny to make Cyber-Bunny!
      • ...Fair enough! :D
    • She didn't have the grist for it. Also JOHNNY MOTHERFUCKING FIVE.

The Guardians, Trolls, dead Dreamselves, dead realselves, Dersites, Prospitians, and Felt will return.
But one person will have to stay behind to distract Death.
  • Death is confirmed to not work like that in the HS verse; players have dreambubble Purgatory in a sense, but everyone else has some afterlife that has yet to be seen. The one person who has returned from that was incredibly upset about it.

Act 7 will either be the beta version of Homestuck, or will end with a link to the first page, causing a Stable Time Loop.
Most characters that have changed over the course of the story will be taken care of by the end, but the Alpha session will end up scratching, triggering a switch back to the original session. Okay that doesn't really make any sense but I thought it was funny.
  • A scratch from the Alpha session seems unlikely- not due to impending success, but because the Beat Mesa belongs to the Hero of Time's planet. There shouldn't be an extra Beat Mesa in the Alpha session, and the Beta kids already flung theirs into Skaia.
    • There was a much more in depth discussion of this on the Alpha WMG page, and we concluded that it is Jossed. All signs, from UU and Rose and others, indicate that the Alpha Session will be successful, and unless Dirk's land has some sort of Scratch mechanism (much like Dave was half-awake on Derse, despite that being part of a Hero of Heart's apparent role), there's no way for them to Scratch anyways.

The kids will defeat the superpowered, allegedly unbeatable Jack Noir in the end
It appears practically impossible at this point, and it would be extremely awesome. Ergo, it has to happen. Maybe now that Jack has scratched himself into the trolls' session, he'll bring them back with him somehow, and then the kids and the trolls will team up against him in an extremely epic battle. A bit of reinforcement: remember that the third Arc Number, 10-25, is the sum of the previous two numbers, 4-13 (the kids' number) and 6-12 (the trolls' number). This implies some sort of synthesis between the two sessions. * Most of Act 5 Act 2 has been devoted to this. It's not easy and actually if done correctly will make him an enormous Anticlimax Boss.
  • At this point Jack is more or less outclassed. If the kids and the trolls really do team up, he'll be facing five God Tiers, one of whom is pretty much omnipotent like him, as well as his own Good Counterpart who has all of his powers.
    • Actually, when you take everything into account, Jack would be facing all four god-teir kids, one of which has first-guardian powers; three or more trolls, powerful from their Sburb session; PM, who also has first-gaurdian powers; plus probably many more characters.
      • Exactly. Meaning that defeating Jack is no longer a huge priority.
  • It's possible that Jack will just stay where he is, rampantly destroying things/dueling with PM.
    • Main WMG Jossed, but this is confirmed. PM ends up slicing Jack's arm which houses the ring on off, depowering him of the prototyped power.

Spades Slick will somehow enter an alternate universe and aid in the eventual defeat of Lord English.
How is this possible? simple, Slick owning Die's voodoo doll that lets you enter a timeline where someone is alive or dead is not a thing that stopped being true, and we also know that Snowman does have a pin, this can be used to escape the universe that is being destroyed. Evidence for this is that in the page where Hussie is going "There are still characters I haven't killed yet!" Spades Slick has a question mark rather than an X, this combined with Die's voodoo doll means he almost certainly is somehow going to be relevant in the future, as I said he will probably want to help defeat Lord English, after all he knows that he needs to utilize glitches in time to hurt him.
  • It's damn near impossible to fit the original Midnight Crew intermission into a coherent spot on the timeline.
  • Though the fact that Hussie somehow managed to rescue Slick and is in the process of cybernetically repairing him does help increase the possibility of this WMG...
    • And now Slick is loose on some planet that seems to be Post-Scratch Earth.
    • Jossed. He ends up going after Jack English and gets his head cut off by Dave.

The whole thing is All Just a Dream
Act 7 will show John, playing in his backyard with several toys strewn about, playing out Homestuck. As he either awakens or stops playing, the last line of the comic will be: "It begins to dawn on you that everything you just did may have been a colossal waste of time."
  • Jossed.

The series will end when Lil Cal is destroyed by the crowbar.
This is why Andrew saved Slick. His role is to destroy the Juju that is more or less the cause of all the misfortune in Homestuck, negating its effects on all timelines and returning all sessions and all players to the way they should have been.
  • Jossed, although Cal's soul is destroyed by Dave.

Trickster Cherubs and the new universe
Trickster Mode is unlocked by combining the juju of two vacillating cherub personalities. Would a trickster cherub be (either logically or by definition) one in which the personalities have resolved into co-dominance or outright merged into one consummate being? Is this the explanation for how Cherubs can have a society despite being asocial cosmic entities dictated by psychological instinct? If this is true, then it means ‘normal’ cherubs live their lives as Aranea explained, but any vacillating pair that manages to cooperate and attain Trickster Mode goes on a different path. They proceed to live in the Zilly continents with all the other trickster cherubs that have “solved all their personal problems”. And this is how there can be cherub culture and mythology, which was something only exposited in the trickster arc.

Jade said she’d deliver the post-scratch Earth to the universe their session creates. Earth is where Calliope and Caliborn were hatched and raised. Therefore, the universe the humans are going to create is the one cherubs exist in. Which means….

The civilization of trickster cherubs seen in the trickster arc will be brought into existence by the protagonists. And the protagonists will live in this world. And they will all become tricksters. The legendary weapons correspond to the eight kids’ strife specibi because they are the rulers presiding over the seven continents. Dirk alone will have nothing to do with this horseshit.

This is how Homestuck will end. The kids cavorting around as the rulers of a planet of living Lil Cals.

  • Jossed.

Lineup for the final show down will relate 413.
This troper thinks it will line up like this 4 humans, 3 trolls probably Karkat, Terezi and Vriska (Somehow Aradia and Vriska will switch live and dead status as they seem to be intended to be opposites of one another) and now we officially have our 1 with fedoraFreak being in the medium... and appearently godtier.
  • What about Kanaya?
  • 4 trolls, 4 alpha kids, 4 beta kids, and Calliope. 4 session offer 13 players.

Alternatively 413 and 612 4 children enter final battle. John, Rose, Dave and Jade. 1 unknown player enter. Being fedorafreak. 3 reset players enter. Nana, Kid Hass, Little Bro and Missy Lalonde, one is unlikely to make it. 6 trolls enter final battle. Karkat, Aradia, Kanaya, Terezi, Vriska and Gamzee. 1 troll revive and enter. We know Vriska returns to witness the green sun. 2 random trolls become relevant again and enter. That Jaspersprite-Nepeta pesterlog was fairly ominous other than maybe Sollux who seems to keep trying to grab some spotlight dispite not actually doing much.

  • Jossed, sadly. When claiming the reward, there are both the Alpha and Beta kids, three Trolls, Calliope and Dad Crocker. Also, the final confrontation with Lord English involves Vriska unsealing Caliborn's Juju, which contains the spirits of the Beta kids, to use against him.

  • The prediction is vague enough to apply with some stretching. Say, in [S] Collide the Beta Kids engage in the final battle in groups of 4 (John, Roxy, Rose, Kanaya), 1 (Jade), and 3 (Dave, Dirk, and Terezi).

     Homestuck Meta, Hussie, and Structure 

When Hussie begins releasing other eight God Tier Hoodies, he will make a self-aware statement along these lines:
"As I'm sure even the least astute of you has deduced I would do, I have released the first of the remaining God Tier hoodies, despite the fact that at least one of them will never be depicted in the comic under any circumstances whatsoever. Technically, I am now a fashion designer, just as I am also technically a seller of astrological merchandise."

Ms. Paint and Cal represent actual people in Adnrew Hussie's life.
Ms. Paint represents either his girlfriend and/or the combined positive attributes of every single girlfriend he ever had in his entire life. Cal, on the otherhand, represents someone he truly hates in real life and/or the combined negative attribute of every person he has ever met.
  • Ms. Paint was a character that was thrown in to placate Ryan North and that the fandom ran with. Make of that what you will.

Act 6 will be devoted to the Alpha Session. Act 7 will be about Lord English.
The Homestuck Disc Portfolio depicts a series of dots representing the Acts. Four red dots for Acts 1-4, a blue dot followed by a red dot for Act 5 Acts 1 & 2, a green dots for Act 6, and a white dot for Act 7. We already know that red represents the Beta session, blue the Trolls' session, and green the Alpha session. Since there is only one green dot, it seems that the Alpha session's story will be resolved in one Act. White is something outside those three universes, or possibly a combination of all three. Since Lord English exists in multiple universes, Act 7 is most likely centered around him. Plus, since he's the Big Bad, it only makes sense for the final act to feature him.
  • Jossed; Word of God is that Act 7 is going to be the Epilogue.
    • Not jossed, it could be about the final fate of Lord English, a sort of "Where Are They Now?" Epilogue. Alternatively, perhaps Act 7 will give us a proper introduction to UU, if her universe is the result of both groups of kids and the trolls working together (see immediately below)?
      • The idea of Act 7 being about the final battle against Lord English though is Jossed.

Homestuck is an allegory of the Bible.
The Medium is purgatory. The four kids died when the meteors struck and went to purgatory. They can contact the others to save them from the depths of hell. The guardians, exiles, and sprites are guardian angels. When John faced his denizen under Terezi's influence, he ascended to heaven - the denizens represent their inner demons and the kids must learn to accept them rather than defeat them. He was brought back from the dead; John being the Heir of Breath means he is the Son of God. He has originally denied this role, represented by his attitude towards Dad, but will learn to accept it by wanting to rescue him and realizing Dad's role as his guardian angel. Skaia is God, the white kingdom are angels and the black kingdom are heretics. Jack Noir is Satan. Jade's dream-self dying will represent her losing her innocence and will make John the purest character of the kids. He will sacrifice himself to save the others from Karkat - this time accepting his role as the Heir of Breath - and they will ascend to heaven with him eventually. Their lands also represent their inner turmoil and past sins, defeating the monsters as penance. Rose thinking her mother is harming her and Dave beginning to think his brother is creepy represents them having doubts and denying God - for this, they are sentenced to Derse/Hell and are only saved because of John. Karkat is the Antichrist. He will corrupt the kids with sin and create the 11 other trolls. They will lose due to their own faults and place the blame on John/Jesus, leading to his first death and second deaths.
  • Jossed oh so very much. Firstly, after John died facing his Denizen, Weird Time Shit happened and he ended up not going through the Seventh Gate. Secondly, the trolls aren't evil. Thirdly, the kids really are responsible for Bec Noir, who messes up the trolls' session. The list goes on.
  • And as of 8/12/11, it's apparent that if anything, Karkat represents the Second Coming of Jesus, hardly the Antichrist.

WMG’s based off of AH’s Neverending Metafiction

FIRST, Know how the story and its trope page states, “Giving something a name gives it power, knowing a name gives power over it?” The Horror Terrors become Squiddles when each one dies by realizing their individual name. Their plea for help comes from how those powered by the Green Sun are naming them. It is possible the Felt are slaying the Horror Terrors in Spades Slick’s world as a way to gain power and territory, because in that world, each Horror Terror is a living world, each nick-named Land of ____ and ____ to avoid saying their real name. The Felt conquer each Land by tearing apart the Land’s planet, compared to Rose tearing apart the Land’s surface structures and seeking hidden treasure to aid her new-found masters. When the Felt learn their real name, they gain power over them, taking their bodies for themselves, and they die, moving on from their world to the Human world, mentally and spiritually locked in for eternity as their dream-selves known as Squiddles. And taking into account how fans slowed down that Squiddles intro to find Anime Girls within the static, its possible their dream selves are actually locked in a medium like a cartoon channel in our world, filled with shows like Squiddles and Horror Terror Magical Anime Girl Hour. That last name is a stretch, but you get the idea.

ALSO, there’s massive foreshadowing here if you look right. It is implied Lord English is going to be Falcor, but it is what he is that is Lord English. He’s a luck dragon, with massive luck. Theory goes it will either be Vriska, due to being Thief of Light, and possessing ability to amass luck, or another Troll who shows abilities similar to Falcor, such as blue-fire breathing and aerial flight without wings, like John.

Andrew pokes fun at Dave being his author avatar, but he’s really referring to how Bastian is Atreyu’s inner self. In this case, Andrew is Dave’s inner self, from another world, and as Andrew created this story-verse, Dave, in universe, kick started this story. My theory here is as Dave is the Knight of Time, he goes back to before the Trolls created the universe, meets Sollux, gets a copy of Sgrub altered to be Sburb, and uses his time travel abilities to fill in gaps that Stable Time Loops cannot explain. Of course, this happens later in the story, near the end of Homestuck.

Vriska’s mind-controlling Andrew could parallel the Childlike Empress sending Atreyu to find a cure for her illness, when she really wanting to be named and end the Nothing. In this case, Vriska wants to die, either as the source of the Trolls and Kids problems, or as a hero, slain by or slaying Bec Noir, thus ending her old identity as the Bluh Bluh Bitch.

FINALLY, Andrew Hussie reads these theories, or someone posts the above on the MSPA forums, and there he reads them. He puts the ideas in the story, but because we saw Vriska view a younger Jade notice AH’s meta-fiction, Jade, as her dream-self, warns some one on Prospit of these theories, like the White Queen, and alters the story so that someone relative to the Exiles, like that One-Shot Prospit Painter, becomes the Big Bad, overcoming Bec Noir, as a playful screw you to his fans. Like as Fridge Logic calls Hussie the Webcomic Kojima, he will pull a planned ass pull near the end of Homestuck that was brilliant all along. OR, he reads all the above, calls this poster a Virgin Loser, and moves on without any Fan Influence as he has been doing for the longest time. But, one can dream, right?
  • I read the first few sentences and yeah this is Jossed.

This WMG page is the new suggestion box.
Hussie continually checks this page here, picks out the WMGs that he likes AND would make the most sense in the plot, and makes it canon.

AH may have based the names SGRUB and SBURB off of real life experiences or sociology
SGRUB could represent the backwards nature of Alternia according to humans perspective, and SBURB represents the perspective of humans in general. Possibly representing the struggle of urban vs. suburban living; peaceful in the suburbs, while chaotic in the cities. Sort of like 2 sides of the same coin, and since the Trolls created the Humans; an alternate world/universe from their failed session, this may not be too far off. In Alternia, the Troll's lifestyle and how they exist is completely bizarre to us, while on Earth; Representing humanity in general, it is exactly how we live to an extent; which is bizarre to them, or whoever is left of them.
  • The Trolls' Lives were peaceful before an outside influence fubared them

    • Speaking of 2 sides of the same coin, the dream worlds of Derse and Prospit fall under a similar paradigm, but in a much older sense; the typical clash of light vs darkness, present in all fiction/lore/myth. AH even mentioned it at one point as a Kingdom of Light and a Kingdom of Darkness that were mentioned to be constantly at each others' throats and were to fight in one final battle when the time came in which Prospit would be defeated according to prophecy. Also, both sides fought alongside each other when presented with an existential threat (Jack Noir). Who subsequently wiped the floor of both kings, and killed off a majority of the inhabitants of both worlds. Also the tumor at the core of the Skaia is a Yin-Yang Symbol. Said Tumor must be the very forces of Chaos which lead to the birth of both universes, so by throwing it into the sun, a massive Scratch would occur and purge everything, resetting the entire multiverse.

    • However this may just be grasping at straws for me.

Atomyk Ebonpyre is cursed.
Think about it. Every time it plays, something awesome is happening...but then something really depressing specifically, a main character death happens or is revealed immediately afterwards. This happens at [S] Accelerate and [S] Descend. The song's out to get the kids.
  • One could make some sort of admonishment about two data points being insufficient to diagnose that sort of pattern... but then, this IS the WMG page...
    • And we'll likely never hear it again.

Andrew Hussie is Dave
The real events of the story began on April 13th 2012. Dave/Hussie is retelling the story of the Kids and Trolls to prepare civilization for the Reckoning, allowing many more people to survive, and he's making it a damn good story so that it gets spread around and is remembered well.
  • This is really sad. People I know have genuinely believed this. It's just a story guys.

No ships will be made canon
Hussie will continue to ship tease all the way until the end, but we'll never get any definitive answers.
  • WK/WQ and Dad/Mom are canon.

Problem Sleuth and (by extension) Jail Break are the future of Homestuck.
Specifically, it's where Dave is currently residing. It's already got the skyscrapers, so the meteors just need to destroy some of them in such a way that the remaining buildings are in a grid-like pattern.
  • Problem Sleuth, Jailbreak, and Bard Quest are all video games in the world of Homestuck.
    • We have videogames with historical settings in Real Life. Problem Sleuth and Jail Break are videogames with prophetic settings.
    • The canons are too irreconcilable, the different origin stories are impossible in the same canon and the universe is completely sideways in PS.
      • That's just the Immaginary world (the one accessed through the portals and the forts). The real world where they ended up in the epilogue though...
      • ... is still made out of GPI's Part-pickles.
  • Red Miles means this is impossible.

There will be a Problem Sleuth intermission.
The first meta thing in the beta session was the webpage for MSPA, and it showed the Midnight Crew, foreshadowing the Midnight Crew intermission. So, Jane's love for Problem Sleuth foreshadows a Problem Sleuth intermission in the Alpha Session. Also, the PS intermission will parallel the Midnight Crew Intermission. The PS cast are all Prospitians.
  • Not only that, but Team Sleuth (along with Hysterical Dame and Nervous Broad) will be the Exiles of...some other session (pre-Scratch Ancestor, probably). It will culminate with PS and co. jumping into the main plot, as PS already has experience with nigh-invulnerable mob bosses.
    • Jossed by Word of God; the PS crew will not appear in Homestuck.

The Flash showing the Pre-Scratch Kids & the Trolls entering the Post-Scratch game will be released on the 31st of May.
And it will use 'Beta Version' from the album Mobius Trip and Hadron Kaleido. Because if it did, not only would the song tie into the flash, it would keep up with the current theme of using songs from the solo albums a year after the albums were released.
  • Jossed

The Kids and Trolls will arrive in the Alpha Session on April 13, 2012 . . .
. . . three years after the start of Homestuck.
  • Jossed

The Beta Kids will arrive in the alpha session on 4/13/12.
It is going to take the kids three years to get to the alpha session and on 4/13/12 Homestuck will celebrate its third year anniversary.
  • Both of these are unlikely barring a time skip... aaaaaand Jossed.

The 'three years' thing is setting up for an event on 4/13/2012.
Specifically, the arrival of John and Jade in the Alpha Session. This is because their adventure began on April 13, 2009. Three years later means 2012. From our perspective, their journey will have only taken a few months. Additionally, all the other characters will also advance in age three years besides Alpha session characters, who will only advance a few months. This means that John and Jane will be sixteen on the dot, while the rest of the human kids will have been sixteen for a few months, and the trolls will be well into their seventh sweep. Adding on to this, the adventure will end on 10/25/2012.
  • We're two days away as I type this and just completed an intermission that chronicled the kids' first year. Barring a time skip, this is looking jossed.
    • Jossed.

It will take half the entire run of Homestuck to defeat the ultimate enemy.
Taking a guess that this character will be Lord English, then this will follow Problem Sleuth. It took half of that adventure to defeat DMK, right? And look at the parallels between DMK and Lord English:
  • The Vessel: Chicago Overcoat vs. Cairo Overcoat.
  • Both are demons.
  • Both characters are the reason that the main characters are stuck in their home or office.
Lord English's powers may also allow him to create an ultra-massive black hole... Now, if the enemy is Bec Noir:
  • The alternate version of Bec Noir is Spades Slick, leader of a notorious gang. The non-imaginary counterpart of DMK is... Mobster Kingpin.
  • Also both demons.
  • Bec Noir has space-altering First Guardian powers. DMK eventually combined with BHMK.
The second option might work better, as prototyped PM gets the look of SEPULCHRITUDE!!! and she may be the end of Bec Noir.
  • Jossed by Andrew; Act 6 will be as long as Act 5 more or less and Act 7 will be as long as Act 1 more or less.

Homestuck will end on April 26th 2013

Exactly 4 years and 13 days after it started, in the fourth month of the year 2013, fitting in the ever-recurrent 413 number theme.
  • It's actually kind of doubtful that it'll go that long. Remember, Hussie originally planned to end it on the one-year anniversary, then the two-year anniversary, then "when it's done".
    • Third anniversary. 14 days "late". He will insist that he did not plan it that way.
      • It's August 2013, we're still far from done, and I have no idea if this has been moved here already.

Andrew Hussie will not show us most of the events of Act 6 thanks to Roxy
UU has stated that she can't see most of what happens during the Alpha kids' session because Roxy has blacked out the session with her Void powers. It's been made clear on multiple occasions that our ability to view Homestuck is tied into one or more of the same mechanisms used in-universe for pseudo out-of-universe entities to view and meddle with things, e.g. by shutting off the fourth walls or closing curtains over them, blowing up exile terminals, scratching the disc, etc. Whatever Roxy does will probably affect us too. Otherwise, it would have to leave a loophole for in-universe meddling.
  • Additionally, Hussie has used these events to fast forward the story telling on at least one occasion (Doc Scratch's narration takeover), and Hussie has said on his formspring account, "[A]ct 6 will be considerably shorter, and act 7 will be minuscule."
  • Plus, if many fan theories are right, and UU is a stand-in for the MSPA readers, then we are as vulnerable as she is to anything that blocks her ability to see. This is our warning and the first foreshadowing of (non)events to come.
    • We saw what Rose did when she was blacked out though, so tentatively Jossed (besides the fact this would probably make the comic something of an anticlimax).
  • And now the Author Avatar is dead, adding more fuel to the fire.
  • Potentially Jossed; it has now been shown that Roxy blacking something out in-universe does not necessarily black it out for us the readers, as she blacks out a bucket brigade to protect UU's innocence, but we can still see it.
    • Pretty Jossed, since act 6 has been the LONGEST act.

Homestuck will end on 4/26/13
Four years and thirteen days after it began.
  • Jossed.
    • How is it jossed? We do not know if we are being faked out yet and it is not past 4/26/13 yet.
      • Nope. Still jossed.


All of the worlds in-play are actually Earth, at different points in the sun's lifespan.

Earth is obviously Earth, of course. Yellow sun and human beings. The cherub planet is most likely <i>also</i> Earth, when the sun is dying in the far future. Because the Statues of Liberty are a horrible movie reference. Thanks a lot, Dave. Alternia's second moon is known to not be an original feature of the planet. Alternia is Earth in between the humans and the cherubim, when the sun is changing color and swelling, but still strong and vital.

This also thematically matches the romance spectrum, where the trolls with all four quadrants are in-between the humans, who only have red, and the cherubim, who only have black.
  • Jossed: The sun expanding to a red giant will actually destroy the earth. The Cherubs will have to live on Mars if they live in a human universe at all.

Whatever the secret weapon that Vriska is trying to find really is, it's hidden in the Alpha kids' session.
Because, after all, X marks the spot.
  • Jossed.

The "secret weapon" is the Scratch of the cherubim session.
  • Jossed. The secret weapon is a boon of Yaldabaoth.

Everyone who died during "[S] Game Over" will end up in Calliope and Jade's dream bubble
And this isn't counting the ones who can still potentially be saved by John's paradox powers. Things that may occur from this:
  • Jane will go back to normal.
  • Jake and Jane will both meet Calliope.
  • Dave, Karkat and Kanaya will be filled in as to what's going on and Jade will try to show them her fantrolls (which may either offend or flatter Karkat and/or Kanaya a little).
  • Calliope will have a fangasm over meeting real trolls.
  • Gamzee will remember Calliope and suddenly feel placated in her presence.
  • They'll all start planning something.
    • A further, tear jerker addition to this theory. Though they will stick around for the grand finale and help out, they will not be brought back from the dead. They will repopulate their species and create new worlds for them, but John, Dirk, Roxy and Rose will be the last humans, and Terezi the last troll.
  • Jossed. Only Jane joins Calliope and Jade in the dream bubble before John resets the timeline, and both Jade and Jane are from the post-reset timeline, so never actually died.

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