Deadpool is a 2013 action game developed by High Moon Studios, previously known for their Transformersgames. The game stars yours truly, Deadpool, seeking revenge on Mister Sinister after a botched contract gone wrong. The game was initially announced at the 2012 Comic-Con to great praise, and was released on June 25th, 2013 in America (June 27th in Europe). I once again do my best Nolan North impression and I like to think I'm getting pretty good at it. Also, prepare to see numerous cameos from various other Marvel Universe characters.The game opened to mixed reviews- many outlets praised my Nolan North impression and the humor of the game, but the gameplay was less well received. Apparently shooting, stabbing and slashing isn't considered fun by some people. Heh, what do they know?
Actually A Doom Bot: The first two times I kill Sinister, Cable tells me that those were clones (and he had a dozen in reserve for the end fight), but Cable said I got the real one at the end.
Adaptational Attractiveness: HEY! Are you saying my girl Death ain't attractive already?! Well okay, I get that her having, skin, helps some people see her as less creepy.
And Now for Someone Completely Different: Thanks to a convenient face-sucking session with Rogue, she ends up stealing my voices, my katanas, my mask AND my starring role! Too bad I didn't manage to witness it myself but from what the voices told me, it was pretty goddamn awesome!
Art Shift: If I remember correctly, my wondrous game changes into an eight-bit parody early on. I didn't really mind it at first, but there's only so many noisy cutesy sprites an insane superpowered mercenary can take.
Artistic License - Gun Safety: I guess scratching my balls with a gun while I'm splayed on my easy chair have gotten some of the safety nuts riled up, but they don't understand! They're so big that I really need the extra reach!
Ascended Meme: I have to throw you losers on the Internet a bone here and there, so I've got a few references that even you guys will get.
Attack! Attack! Attack!: When you geeks play as Rogue, she can't use my teleport or counter. In fact, that button makes her just use a horizontal slash.
Probably more clones, Sinister always seems to have more those.
Bad Future: Cable says the future sucks, so we have to kill Sinister to fix it, or something like that. I wasn't really listening, because let's face it; Cable is always yapping on and on about "impending doom" this and "end of the world" that. Yeesh, lighten up, Summers!
BFG: Cable caries on that's almost as long as he is tall, and he won't let me use it saying it's too heavy. Some Giant Mooks also carry these, either in the form of chain guns or rocket launchers, the things are so heavy that they actually slow me down when I use them.
Big Bad: Mister Sinister, or should I say Captain Douche.
Blade Spam: When you losers finally unlock my second sai overdrive, you get to see how much fun "Stabbity Stabbity" is.
Also, I guess this is where I mention my similar attack with my sledgehammers. I would list this under "Hammer Spam," but clearly, I'm the only one awesome enough to use that.
But Thou Must: Verily, but without all that Ye Olde Butcherede Englishe. When I finally sneak up on Sinister, I let the player have a nice chat with the dialogue box - though if the gamer keeps it up, the box gets downright creepy, and the "have fun/don't have fun" option simply becomes "stab Sinister/stab Sinister." Finally, a win/win!
Except when he tried to bribe me with promises of a big-breasted fan girl who totally wants me. Or did I imagine that?
Comically Missing the Point: Look, the point is Sinister needs to pay for messing up my contract. All that other stuff about the future and the X-Men and Sinister doing something (dare I say it? OF COURSE) sinister? Whatever!
And seriously, you can't tell me that Sinister is in the security tower and not expect me to kick his ass.
When trying to blast into a safe room with C4, White Box suggests using 20 ounces of C4, and the Yellow Box expresses his hate for the metric system and wanting to use the American system. And no, I'm not going to point out to him that ounces are from the American system, but maybe I'll bring that I'm Canadian, maybe.
Contest Winner Cameo: He was supposed to bring me a pizza, but he never showed up. Where did I find him, you ask? Pottering about in the catacombs of Genosha is where! Worse than that, the asshole tried to kill me before I got the chance to demand my late pizza be given to me for free! You bet I filled the punk with lead. He needed to know his place!
Cable caries one, too, and won't let me try to use it!
Crazy-Prepared: I had a feeling High Moon was going to reject my awesome videogame idea. So I left a "present" for them in their HQ.
Death from Above: I fight one variety of mook that acts like Storm's evil brother, trying to drop lightning bolts and icicles down on my head.
I later get Cable to jury-rig the foot of a destroyed Sentinel to rocket about Genosha at random, dropping in on some henchmen too stupid to bother looking up.
Mr Shuggums must have been taking notes. He stepped on the real Sinister for me! Who's a good boy?
Distressed Damsel: I wouldn't be surprised if all the X-Babes needed saving. Wolverine too.
Double Jump: Hey, if almost every other superhero in a platformer can have one, why can't I? Up yours, physics!
Driven to Suicide: Seriously, does Cable realize how boring he is? Whenever he gives me his dire-warning-from-the-future crap, I just wanna blow my brains out!
Dropped a Bridge on Him: How Vertigo dies the first time, I just casually shoot her. Easily the most unceremonious death in the game.
But just to give the player the full experience in my game, they get to take a shot at Vertigo again thanks to the miracle of cloning. And I guess Sinister didn't make any improvements since that shot kills her, too.
Drop the Hammer: My stylish pair o' sledgehammers, perfect for getting those stubborn bloodstains off the carpet. Wait, no, got that backwards - perfect for getting those stubborn bloodstains on the carpet.
Dual Wielding: All of my weapons, period. Hey, what can I say, if you got two hands, might as well make use of them!
Effortless Achievement: Hey, the game loves its fans! So here's two achievements for merely starting the game and two more for finishing looking around the apartment before you even start the slashy stab kill stuff. You're welcome!
Excuse Plot: What? No, this is super serious stuff, man. Chimichangas and tacos are at stake! Plus, you get to see how awesome I am.
They're probably talking about that thing with Mr. Sinister, and satellites, and future stuff.
The only thing we care about is that Sinister killed the guy I was supposed to kidnap! That's obviously the most important part!
I think "observant" would be the word you're looking for.
Yeah. If you're one of those observant types and look close enough when I'm rewriting the script High Moon sent me, you'll see... It says exactly what me and my thought boxes are saying. How did you guys do this anyway? You got any telepaths working there? You got, don't you?
Gameplay and Story Segregation: Technically, my teleporter works a lot better than the silly little distance it lets you travel in my game. And it almost never needs a cooldown. But it just wouldn't be as much fun if you could teleport all over the place and win the game in about two seconds flat.
Okay, that would actually be totally awesome, but then you would miss me gutting all those clones!
Gatling Good: I get my hands on a sweet minigun when I hijack a helicopter. Gatling very good!
Some of the mooks I fight have them too. They shoot ice for some reason. But when I kill them, I can shoot ice too!
Generic Doomsday Villain: Mr. White, doesn't have a lot of personality and is mostly just around to serve as a target for me. Come to think of, pretty much all the villains in the game are, the Marauders don't even talk, Sinister barely gets enough screen time to display much personality, apart from being pissed off at me for foiling his plans.
Giant Space Flea from Nowhere: Get this: if you get too triggerhappy on a machine that produces Exploding Barrels in a game like this, it glitches itself and some random NPC dude out of existence, ends up in a platform hell, gains sentience and tries to kill me! Who knew? Seriously, if someone told me that was gonna happen...well, I probably would've done it anyway since that was a pretty cool level.
Good Bad Girl: Lady Deadpool (Rogue), When Rogue absorbs my healing factor. She also absorbs my slutty personality.
Gorn: I could give Mortal Kombat a run for its money with the over the top gore in my game.
Half the Man He Used to Be: Shit happens sometimes to me. Makes for a great party trick if I actually manage to land on some poor bastard's head.
Healing Factor: Part of my power set if you didn't know from my comics (and if your don't, get the hell off this page and read my fabulous TV Tropes entry. Or better yet, read the comics. I need the money dammit!) and good thing too, cause I get very, very mutilated in this game. Hell I even do it to myself when Cable doing his "The Future is Doomed" Blah Blah Blah.
And everybody that has this in comics has theirs ignored here, mainly Wolverine and Sinister.
Hey, Catch!: Since the cool futuristic pew-pew guns come with a fingerprint scanner by default, I might as well make use of it and challenge random unaware clones to an impromptu shootout: while they're trying and failing to find the trigger, I'll just turn their head into fine red mist with my other gun. And even if they'd manage to find the trigger in time, they still wouldn't be able to fire it! Win-win for me!
Highly-Visible Ninja: And yet I still manage to get those stealth kills! 'Cause I'm awesome. Sinister may also consider getting a less crappy temp agency for his goons.
Impaled with Extreme Prejudice: Both me and Arclight. Too bad for her she doesn't have a healing factor, although she does have a nice pair of titties, almost didn't notice I was busy being penetrated by a huge rod thanks to them!
Intimate Healing: I bravely, selflessly, heroically kiss Rogue so that she can absorb my healing factor!
Interface Screw: Let's see YOU try to walk where someone tells you to when your head is on backwards and you're missing an arm to twist it back! Probably not gonna happen 'cause you don't have my awesome healing factor. Also, what's up with that part where the player just sat there with a thumb up their ass with their fancy first person camera when I saw one of those transformers and ran to it? I can't have a game when the dude with the camera doesn't do his job properly! Show some goddamn initiative, man!
Inevitable Waterfall: Double subverted on this one! While I was at sailing down a river with Death, I thought there was one ahead! Thankfully, it was extremely short. But then, the other one that follows immediately after got me so deep the Player's camera lost me for a bit!
Justified Tutorial: Well, justified for you, maybe. I know what I'm doing...but then again, this is a new medium for me, so I guess I should maybe pay attention. HA! No.
Jiggle Physics: Rogue, Domino, Death... Basically every girl I meet. Coincidence? I think not.
Katanas Are Just Better: Well duh. They ain't as fast as my sais, or as strong as my hammers, but they're the best of both worlds. Or the average of both worlds, I guess.
Kill It with Fire: Seems like High Moon didn't think all those dismemberments and awesome acrobatics from yours truly were enough, so they decided that when I hit dudes hard enough, flames shoot out of my weapons and the ground temporarily turns into magma. Doesn't really make much sense, but I sure as hell ain't complaining!
Lampshade Hanging: Those imaginary girls sure were insightful. Not that I would know, considering I fell asleep while they were talking:
Girl 1: "Oh my god, this conversation is like sooo cliche." Girl 2: "I know, right? It's almost like we were specifically written with female character tropes in mind. It's almost painful blah blah blah *incomprehensible muttering*.
Alongside that, I lampshade plenty of objects me and the voices in my head meet when we come across them in our travels.
Me: Exploding barrels! Also Me: It's like they were placed there specifically for us to use. High Mooooooooon!
OOC Is Serious Business: While I mostly make jokes of everything, even Sinister's Evil Plan, the massacre of the mutants on Genosha by the Sentinels is something that even I won't joke about.
Optional Stealth: On one hand, you don't get to see my awesome acrobatics when you sneak up on goons with their backs turned. On the other, their reaction when I get an instant kill on them is HILARIOUS. Decisions, decisions...
Overly-Long Gag: Hey, it's not my fault if the player keeps leaving me hanging at critical moments, like whether I should get myself out of an awkward situation. Like hanging up the phone. Or when they force me to slap my best buddy Wolvie silly instead! Quite frankly, you have no one to blame but yourself. And High Moon. And Daniel Way. And the achievement system for encouraging this kind of behavior.
Railroading: Attempted by White Box. He really wishes me and Yellow Box would stop fucking around and actually pay attention to the story.
Rage Against the Author: If High Moon can't make my game the way I want, you bet your ass I'm going to call them out on it!
Rebus Bubble: Used when Cable tells me to stay away from the security tower, because Mister Sinister was on it. Of course I go after him anyways. Hey, the guy basically stole my contract!
Real Is Brown: It is not! Oh, you mean the coloring. Yeah the doesn't a lot of color outside of some the characters costumes do its areas, in order, consist of; a skyscraper, a sewer (a very brown one), most of it in a ruined city on Genosha, with some buildings with grey interiors, and briefly going into a cave. So get used to grey, cause there isn't a lot else.
Rule of Funny: Same here. Wait, would that cause some kind of cool-funny Internet singularity problem? Awesome!
Saying Sound Effects Out Loud: Designers really need to understand that buttons and stuff should make "beep" and "boop" sounds when you press them. Until they do, I guess I'll fill in for them. But they'd better appreciate it!
Sexposition: This one time, Summers was going on about his dire-warning-from-the-future crap and it was so boring that I had to shot myself to shut him up. However, he left a note (in my chest) saying he wanted me to the north of Genosha. I didnt want to until the note mentioned that there's also a big-breasted woman who claims to be my biggest fan! There wasn't... I was actually groping Cable.
Stealth-Based Mission: Ordinarily, I wouldn't pass up the chance to have bullet-y fun for everyone. But I reeeeeally wanted revenge on that prick Sinister, so I made sure to take out all his guards silently. Sure as hell not gonna bother doing it again if I need to watch the player fall in love with a text prompt again, though.
Stuff Blowing Up: I wouldn't want to restrict myself to just stabbing, shooting, lasering, slashing, smashing, and stabbing. I mean, that'd just get dull. So I have a few grenades and land mines. You know, for giggles.
Also, at various plot-critical moments, I reach into my handy stock of C4 to make the kind of explosions that break the budget. Literally.
Super Powered Mooks: Sinister's army of clones has about a half-dozen different kinds of these, but most of the game is spent fighting his powerless ones. Doesn't seem like he's really got it down pat though, I'm pretty sure Gambit knows more than 2 words and I don't think his powers consist of "do your best zombie impression and then blow yourself up". Would be a lot funnier if that's all he could do, though.
Take Our Word for It: That guy I was supposed to kidnap WAS a bad guy. If what you're told about him ain't enough, there's the fact that he's helping Sinister.
Take That, Audience!: I told the comic nerds who complained that Rogue cannot currently fly in the comics but can in the game to stop whining about it, move out of their parents' basement and then get laid. Hey, I got their money already, what are they going to do about it, trade the game in?
The Unreveal: When the X-Men, and later Cable, try to talk about Sinister's plan, I don't pay attention because exposition is boring.
Toilet Humor: Well, there are toilets, and I'm practically made of humor, so it's to be expected. Besides, it's a natural thing, there's nothing to be ashamed of... well, except for that guy. Wears his socks down his underpants, if you know what I'm saying.
Unexpected Character: The freaking Marauders are in this game! I even lampshade it. They seriously couldn't get better villains?
Unexpected Gameplay Change: Come on! You should have seen the sidescrolling platformer bit coming when you saw the green pipe I was about to go down.
High Moon does this a lot in my game, actually. Something about how the pipe-surfing and turret sections break up the brawler gameplay so it doesn't get repetitive. Whatever.
Unreliable Narrator: Y'know that part about me finding my No. 1 fangirl?, when I get to grope "her," I end up groping Cable.
Villainous Breakdown: Sinister has a big one when I show at his door step and slaughter the army of clones he sends at me.
With Catlike Tread: Look, if you want to perform a stealth kill with unsilenced handguns, shotguns, uzis or plasma rifles, don't come crying to me when everyone in the room hears about it! I'm just making use of the opportunity to be awesome when I pump enough clips into them to simultaneously dismember and juggle them in midair.
Wolf Pack Boss: In the final battle, Sinister throws waves of clones of himself at me, and they hit like wimps!