Useful Notes / Conspiracy Theories

"It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things."

Conspiracy theories are, essentially, Wild Mass Guessing, Headscratchers, and Fanon Discontinuity (in the sense that something didn't happen according to the way "official" sources said it did) applied to Real Life. Like all memes, conspiracy theories mutate and interbreed almost too fast for humans to track. Any of the theories and sub-theories mentioned below can be, and in all likelihood has been, combined with any or all of the others by at least one person. Don't be surprised if the theory raises more questions than the original incident in the first place. The only thing such theories prove, if anything, is that we're all too human. or maybe illuminaty? D:

It is important to distinguish a Conspiracy Theory from a regular theory about a conspiracy. A conspiracy is merely a plan by more than one person to commit a crime, and a theory about it could be made. However, it is different from a Conspiracy Theory, as a Conspiracy Theory explicitly means a fringe theory which purports that events, either in the news or in history, are not as we understand it but really the works of secret cabals of cunning conspirators acting for malicious ends, from merely getting rich to propagating an ideology up to and including world domination.

One very easy way to debunk many of these theories, especially the big ones, is through the use of Occam's Razor. Suppose there was a plot to commit mass murder or to fake a terrorist attack. Suppose a hundred people were directly involved, and they were each paid a hundred million dollars. Suppose all their friends and relatives, some whom would be investigators, reporters, ect, also had to be paid off, pass up the case or the story of the millennium. They all had to be paid off or silenced. The bribe or assassination rate was a hundred percent.

Speaking of which the conspirators were able to carry out said plot. They had the intelligence to do so, the fact they are derided for being so stupid is neither here nor there. They had shown there is no price they will not pay, no depth they would not stoop to. They had already carried out all manner of terrible deeds. The lone ranger on the Internet would not evade them. Nor are those involved above executing those who alone know the truth...aha, why are they still spreading their message? Or maybe because they are still breathing there being no conspiracy and thus no need to do something to stop the truth from getting out is exactly the plan.

People who tend to have these can be found under "Conspiracy Theorist." The Mel Gibson film Conspiracy Theory has its own article.


  • #-G: 9/11, Aliens, Disasters, Disinformation, Famous People, Guns
  • H-N: Health; History, Monuments, and Ancient Civilizations; Homosexuals; Jews/Israel; The John F. Kennedy assasination; Law and Enforcement; Media; New World Order (NWO)/Secret Societies
  • O-Z: Race and Immigration, Religion and Apocalyptica, Science and Technology, Sports, Tax Protestor Arguments, Wars, Weather and the Atmosphere
  • Other: Other, Parodies, Actual Conspiracies

Waldorf: Seems like a lot of people are plotting to Take Over the World.
Statler: This world? Who would want it?
Both: Do-ho-ho-ho-hoh!