Hello. To Tropers, my name is Maedar. What's a Maedar you ask? Well, in the 2nd Edition of the Dungeons & Dragons
game, it was the name given a male medusa. (Fans of my Shadowchasers
series know that its not what they're called in that fic.) I chose the name because I thought it was unique and no-one would copy it.
My other pseudonym, used on Fanficion.net, is Cyber Commander, which is this
. It's an utterly worthless card, not only weak, but not weak enough
to use Machine Duplication on, which makes it really
bad. The card may have gone totally unnoticed if not for the fact that Honda claimed it was his favorite card. (Why, I have no idea.) Again, I chose the name because I figured it was a unique name that no-one would copy.
But anyway... My real name, I won't disclose, but I'm a security guard and as you may have guessed, a part-time writer. I was born on August 31st; Princess Diana would die on that same date, the day I'd start college, a bad omen, I must admit... (I also share the same birthday as Caligula
, as some delightful individuals
have pointed out, but Richard Gere too.)
People have often asked me where I get my ideas. (Why
I get my ideas is a close second.) I wish I could tell them... I've been trying to figure that out myself for years! Seriously, if I had to guess, I'd say that being a writer is sort of like being a wizard in the works of J. K. Rowling
, you either have it or you don't. And having said that, writers, just like the wizards in the book, are varied. There are great ones (like the three main characters, of course), ones that aren't so great (like say, Gilderoy Lockhart) and downright nutty ones (like Professor Trelawney). (Are there writers you could compare to Voldemort? Well, maybe a few, like the guy who wrote The Turner Diaries
But enough about Rowling.
It's not that I don't have inspiration, of course. Here are a few sources that I'm a fan of, which have helped greatly:
Live Action TV
Amazing I have time to write, huh?
Anyway... Here are some Tropes that apply to Maedar, just so you get to know me...
- Berserk Button: I believe I speak for every security guard in this city when I say that the people who annoy us the most are the ones who think this profession is occupied by people who "couldn't become real cops". And by the way, to those who think they can abuse and disrespect a security guard because we aren't real cops and do not have the power of arrest, we can get a real cop (or a few) to our posts in two minutes, tops. Believe me, I have yet to meet even one real cop who finds that joke funny.
- Big Applesauce: And proud of it! It's a Hell of a town...
- Big Eater: What can I say? It's true.
- Cassandra Truth: I've often made predictions about the OCG game that no-one has believed. "Crush Card Virus' days are limited." Check. "Inzektor decks aren't going to survive the next list." Check. "The Aesir are going to be seriously nerfed when they're released." Check. "You're going to be disappointed by the real version of The Seal of Orichalcos." Double check. No-one has ever believed me.
- And boy, was this the case during Yu-Gi-Oh! 5Ds. I was practically the Only Sane Man, insisting that Z-One was an imposter while everyone was sure he was really Yusei. So when the truth was told and people were filling discussion boards with page after page of rage (mostly because their fanfics all made no sense), I wasn't surprised at all. (And to make matters worse, only one of the people who had spent the whole time insulting my logic apologized.)
- Dangerously Genre Savvy: A lot of people base their careers on assuming people are stupid. A Bad Liar often forgets that it takes two minutes - tops - to find the official documents on the subject they're lying about on the internet, which I often do. Here's a benign example (it only involved the card game): A guy who was in favor of putting Skill Drain on the OCG Forbidden List claimed he had a "killer" combo during the Tele-DAD era, where he used Skill Drain, used Forbidden Lance on his own DAD, and was thus able to use DAD's effect to win the game. This seems like a powerful combo, but it has one problem: Forbidden Lance wasn't released until two years after the Tele-DAD era. (And people can be caught like this on FAR more serious subjects, I might add.)
- Doesn't Like Guns: I'm no pacifist, but seriously, you'll never catch me near one of them. (And the NRA really gets on my nerves.)
- Drugs Are Bad: Never smoked, never drank, never had anything stronger than coffee, and if it's "cool" to do those things, I'd rather be warm. Seriously, have you every kissed a girl who just smoked a cigarette? I did once... Never called her back.
- Even Bad Men Love Their Mamas: Hey, I'm not "bad", but... Let me put it this way, if you say bad things about my mom, then seriously, you're gonna think differently.
- Fun with Acronyms: Looking back, this may have been the only good part about those two crossovers I mentioned below. I was rather good at making these up.
- In Name Only: Following the Miscarriage of Justice that is the Amanda Knox case, I will now consider my Italian heritage to be nothing but a technicality of my family line.
- The Legions of Hell: A lot of folks who read my fics ask me what deck I personally use when I play the Yu-Gi-Oh! game. Answer: Dark World.
- Old Shame: I once did a crossover with The Powerpuff Girls and Codename: Kids Next Door, and even wrote a sequel. Let me put it this way, you can read them on fanfic, but... Please DON'T...
- Another thing I regret... Well, there's a reason why Gerald Laxina does not appear in the new version of Thousand Year Door. The fanfic author who created the character is a former friend, emphasis on former. Since our falling out, he has created an extensive blog devoted to insulting one of my fics. I must say, I have never seen so much effort given to a blog that is one huge snark, and I trust I need say no more.
- Saw "Star Wars" Twenty-Seven Times: Actually, it's exactly 36 times, as of last count.
- Sweet Tooth: Eh... Call it a weakness.
- Shut Up, Hannibal!: My typical reaction to anyone who promotes the ideas listed below who tries to intimidate me with them. If I don't ignore them.
- Trademark Favorite Food: Steak and mashed potatoes
- What Might Have Been: I've never told anyone this, but what the Hell... One fanfic that I outlined but never wrote cast Seto Kaiba as the protagonist, putting him in a position similar to Dante in The Divine Comedy, going through Hell in order to reach Heaven in order to find what ultimately happened to Kisara. (Noah would have had Virgil's role.) Why? Well, it was complicated. I planned to have him encounter many famous - and dead - characters from several genres and realities, not just anime. They included Grand Moff Tarkin, Jabba the Hutt, and Chewbacca, and that's just from Star Wars. (Why was Chewbacca in Hell? Again, it was complicated.) While dueling would be used to solve a few problems, it would be the exception, not the rule, to the way Kaiba would survive. So... Why did I abort this project? Well, to be honest, this was an idea that was overworked to death until I didn't like it at all. Take note: It is possible to work on something too much.
- Why Did It Have to Be Snakes?: No surprise to me why Indiana Jones hates these things. My dad is the same way; guess that's where I get it from. (By the way, this is not why I made a bunch of Snake People the villains in one of my fics. I did that because, well, let's face it, lots of people find snakes scary.)
What follows are Subverted Tropes
; I don't like them at all, but I will oppose them when I can:
- Conspiracy Theory: Whenever someone claims anything mentioned on the Trope Page is real, I can only think, "What an idiot".
- Disproportionate Retribution: I really don't like Lindsay Lohan's detractors who constantly ask why no judge has ever "thrown the book at her" and had her locked up in a real prison. Yeah, sure, the judge should give absolutely no clemency to this unrepentant, brutal... uh... shoplifter? Seriously, people, The way these people talk, you'd think she committed a capital offense. Real prisons are too busy with criminals who commit crimes like assault and battery, rape, and murder, and simply don't have the budget. Furthermore, the common claim that she "got off easy" isn't true. Most who did what she did would have only been fined; she got community service work because she was rich and a fine would have meant little.) (Not that I'm a fan of Lohan, but honestly...)
- Draco in Leather Pants: Remember when I compared writers to Harry Potter characters? Fanfic writers who believe this sort of thing are the ones that I'd compare to Gilderoy Lockhart. I'm also not a fan of the Ron the Death Eater and Obligatory Swearing Tropes. I refuse to read the works of writers who use them.
- The Memetic Mutation Trope is pretty dumb too. To give one example, most of the villains in Freakazoid! were pretty ridiculous (and that was the whole point), but I would say that Candle Jack wasn't even in the top ten. Or twenty. (What? Did you really think I was gonna do that silly joke?)
- Gangsta Rap: I've never understood why this music (I use the term loosely) ever became popular. Here's some trivia: I know nobody truly reads Playboy for the interviews, but the magazine still has them, and I read somewhere that more than 50% of ALL cuss words in ALL of the magazine's interviews can be found in Snoop Dogg's interview. Given the long history of the magazine's run, that should tell you something about the "artists" in this genre.
- The Hunger Games: Can someone tell me why this series was so popular? I think it was garbage. I've seen better writing and plot from the scripts for the half-hour toy commercials that were passed off as cartoons in the '80s. See, the plot is pretty much the same as The Running Man, and makes just as little sense. The despotic government thinks that killing children and forcing people to watch is going to prevent another insurrection? Seriously? Makes you wonder how they were able to quash the first one.
- Hypocrite: I'll give you an example. I know a guy who argues loudly for the rights of gun ownership. He also argues loudly that they should lock Casey Anthony up and throw away they key. This basically means he adamantly supports the 2nd Amendment, but thinks they should burn the 6th. He is beneath contempt.
- Politically Incorrect Villain: I've proud to say I once volunteered, along with about 600 others, to form a counter protest against a planned protest by the WBC. (The cowards never showed up. Figures.) And I'd do it again, either to oppose them or a similar group.
- Reality Show: I firmly believe that the purpose of these shows is to entertain viewers by humiliating people. The worst is Survivor. It claims to encourage cooperation among the contestants, but it really encourages them to double-cross each other.
- Shock Jock: Rush Limbaugh had some nerve to insult Sandra Fluke. If anything, she has has more right to comment on politics than he does. Know what she has that he doesn't? A degree. (Howard Stern has one, btw, and I don't like him either.)
- I'm also sickened by the fact that these guys tend to be Karma Houdinis. Don Imus was fired for his racist slur against the Rutgers' girls, and was back on the air with another station in less than a year. Only in America...
- Those Wacky Nazis: Let me put it this way, if you deny the Holocaust, wear jewelry or tattoos shaped like that awful symbol, portray them in a positive light, or even promote the untrue myth that Hitler invented the Volkswagon, you can consider me an enemy. (In fact, I don't like the name of this Trope. "Wacky' suggests there's something funy about them.)
- Twilight: I have no problem with the Our Vampires Are Different Trope, but this show makes me think that Bram Stoker is rolling over in his grave every time it airs.
- Even worse is Fifty Shades of Grey, which is little more than a ripoff of Twilight. (It's obvious, seeing as it's really an expanded version of Twilight fanfiction that the author once wrote, but very few fans of the book even care.) Writing fanfiction as a hobby is okay, trying to actually sell it is not. And hey, when you rip off another work to write a bad story, you should try ripping off a good story, not another bad story.
- Zombie Apocalypse: Or rather the growing number of people who believe this is actually possible due to the popularity of The Walking Dead. It's a fantasy, people, for crying out loud!
I'm also a firm believer that The Complainer Is Always Wrong.
(Ah, heh, heh... That was a little joke there, people... Guess I couldn't resist.
Heh... Seems I lead a pretty active life for a security guard from Brooklyn, huh?
I'll close this by giving some advice on writing fanfiction. When I look at my earliest works, I think "What the Hell was I thinking when I wrote this crap?"
In other words, everyone starts small, so if at first you don't succeed, try, try again, several times if necessary. Not only is patience a virtue, so is tenacity.
Oh, and Ghiselle
, I know you're reading this, and I don't give a damn. (To anyone else who's wondering, let's just say, it's personal.