Trope Co: Instant A.I. Kit
Are you a Mad Scientist or Evil Genius who doesn't have the spare time to gather up everything yourself? A Teen Genius looking for a new and original science fair project? A Gadgeteer Genius in need of some inspiration? Or just someone who is building a perfectly harmless homemade transistor radio and certainly not a device to assist you in world domination? No matter what your circumstances, we here at Trope Co. can supply you with all the parts you need to build your very own Artificially Intelligent Super-Assistant! Parts will include some or all of the following and more:
- One (1) Xbox 360 and One (1) Playstation 3 gaming console - great computing horsepower at a discount price! (Also useful for playing games with your new robot buddy.)
- A $250 Radio Shack grab bag - you can't go wrong with a big pile of electronicky ... stuff.
- Fifty (50) holographic bio-optic storage cubes - the latest technology with super-fast access speed! Great for storing all the intercepted broadcast information on the planet or your giant collection of perfectly legally-downloaded videos and mp3s!
- A teddy bear - Use it to teach your new friend warmth and humanity, or target practice, depending on your particular bent.
- 50" LCD HDTV - Your new Artificial Friend can project his image on it for communicating with inferior fleshy life-forms, or use it to watch the big game, your choice! (Why not both?!)
- Your choice of either a Flux Capacitor or an Oscillation Overthruster.
- Three (3) spools of professional-quality fiber-optic cable;
- 500' of contractor-grade ventilation tubing;
- One (1) spool of Cat5 ethernet cable - even if you never use the cables or tubing, strew them about the place for ambience!
- A lump of a strange, rocky substance that glows with an otherworldly colour - we're not sure exactly what it does or where it came from, but it whispers to us in our sleep.note
- Fifty (50) metal spatulas.
- One (1) box of dry macaroni noodles.
- One (1) positronic quantum processor with invertible polarity.
- One (1) pair of rubber kitchen gloves.
- One (1) pair of safety goggles - because we here at Trope Co. care about your safety!
- One (1) lightning rod.
- One (1) klein bottle of 99.99% reverse-osmosis-purified water.