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Too Dumb To Live: Professional Wrestling

  • In a real life case: WWE Champion Brock Lesnar was scheduled to face Hardcore Holly on the September 12 (taped September 10), 2002 episode of WWE SmackDown!. Lesnar was still new to WWE back then, and Holly, who hated having to work with rookies, regularly stiffing them (punching/kicking them full force, resulting in bruises and occasionally concussions) and sandbagging moves (not distributing weight evenly, making it very difficult if not outright impossible for the one to the lift the other), was furious about having to put Lesnar over. So, aside from stiffing Lesnar, he at one point decided it would be a good idea to sandbag a Lesnar Powerbomb. Brock, being legitimately one of the strongest wrestlers in the company, lifted him anyway, and accidentally dropped Holly on his neck, breaking it and shelving Holly for 13 months. On the bright side, Holly learned his lesson regarding sandbagging, and no one was stupid enough to try such a thing with Lesnar again.
    • Holly denies that he was deliberately sandbagging Lesnar in his book. When asked point-blank about the incident in an interview with Wrestlecrap.com, he responded, "No...[if] Brock can belly to belly suplex Big Show over his head, do you really think I can sandbag Brock Lesnar…highly unlikely and impossible! Just a move that went wrong as moves do go wrong at times in pro wrestling."
  • On the May 25, 1998 episode of WCW Monday Nitro, WCW United States Heavyweight Champion Goldberg defended the title against Jobber Johnny Attitude, who came out for the match with a bald head and even imitated Goldberg's mannerisms. The match itself lasted 1:09. If you've never heard of Johnny Attitude, there's a reason.
  • On a more mundane note, those Jobbers who try to slam or shoulderblock Kamala, Earthquake, Vader, etc.
  • At ECW's December 5, 1998 show (aired on December 9), held at the Burt Flickinger Center in Buffalo, NY, Lance Storm (w/"Tammy Lynn Bytch" [Dawn Marie]) was scheduled to face Mikey Whipwreck. Storm walked to the ring carrying a cassette box for Hitman Hart: Wrestling With Shadows, saying that he wasn't going to let Paul Heyman "screw" him like that, and left. Mikey got on the mic and issued a challenge to wrestle anyone. Rod Price walked out and accepted. Mikey chickened out, saying that he wanted to wrestle, but that Price doesn't wrestle, he fights, and left. Price got on the mic and issued a challenge to anyone who "wants a damn fight!" Cue "Natural Born Killaz," AND HERE COMES NEW JACK!. Jack proceeded to Squash Price in his usual style in about two minutes, finishing with the guitar shot off the top. Joey Styles even said, "In ECW, you do not throw out open challenges."
    • On the September 16, 2000 ECW Hardcore TV, the Musketeer threw out an open challenge to anyone...and "The Female Fighting Phenom" Jazz ran in and kicked his ass in 49 seconds. After the match, Joey Styles mocked him by saying, "Good night, d'Artagnan!"
  • Real Life case: Teddy Hart, an infamous Spot Monkey notorious for refusing to follow the script and doing insane high-flying moves just to show off. Doing these moves forces the other wrestlers to catch him unprepared, nearly getting everyone injured or killed. This blatant disregard for everyone's safety plus Teddy's primadonna attitude, have led him to be fired and blacklisted from several promotions, including WWE, TNA, and ROH (where the stunt took place) — which is a pity, because he does have a lot of talent, but until he grows a brain he isn't going anywhere.
Oral TraditionToo Dumb to LiveRadio

alternative title(s): Pro Wrestling
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